Montana Sean Brown

Montana, son. . . I miss you so much, I love you so much, I saw so much of myself in you, my personality, my humor, everything about you was so much like me growing up. And, because of that, I was hard on you. . . I tried so hard to protect you. . . To focus your energy (which was boundless) in healthy directions, to make good decisions and choices, which you did the majority of the time. . . You were always so honest and sincere yet funny and mischievous. Remember how I told you that whether you wanted to be or not that you are a leader. . . that you had to use your powers and influence to channel things in the right direction rather than sew anarchy and chaos? You were an unstoppable force of nature, you did not accept that something could not be done or "no" for an answer. . . you always kept trying either by reasoning, discussing, arguing, charming, negotiating, or ignoring to get what you wanted. I really thought in the last six months, where we have spent so much time together, during "Daddy lockdown" that we were making some real progress. . . I so wish I could have protected you from this. I really thought I was doing all the right things to do that. I have so much guilt and anger over having been out of town, like I provided the forum for you boys to get into this trouble. . . I am so sorry for my part in this. You were a character. . . the stories I am hearing from your friends and brothers about the crazy fun things you did and the memories of our own fun times and even hard times. . . it is so overwhelming. I am trying to make this count for something Montana, I don't want your life to slip away so soon and not have mattered. . . because I know you had the capacity and strength to grow into adulthood and be a great man, possibly one who would make a great difference in the lives of many others. . . Son, I know we will see one another again. . I have no doubt in my heart and my mind and my soul about that. . . but I am going to miss you. . . I so miss you. Son, Monty. . . I am sharing what happened to us with others in hope that we can save some other child's or adult's life. That we can make a difference for you having left us so soon, I miss you, my son. . On Saturday December 21, 2013 we are going to celebrate your life and hopefully positively affect some others. . . all I know is that you are gone and that I miss you. . . for more information go to www.facebook.com/montanaseanbrown

Love your Dad

Eric Sean Brown