Bruce "Melinda Ryder" Winter

Bruce Winter, 70, of Kansas City, MO, passed away peacefully in his sleep on September 8, 2026, at The University of Kansas Hospital/Kansas City Hospice with family by his side after a 6-month battle with cancer.

Born Bruce Edward Winter to Vernon and Jeanne Winter on March 8, 1956, in Saint Louis, MO. He was the second born of four siblings, having an older sister Nora, and a younger sister and brother, Lynn and Paul. Family joke that when he came along, he knocked Nora off her pedestal of being the star and an only child, and they fought like cats and dogs ever since. If they only knew that he really was born to be the STAR!

Bruce attended Normandy High School in Saint Louis and graduated in 1974, then headed to Northwest Missouri State University in Maryville, MO. He only attended 1 year before transferring to the University of Missouri - Kansas City in Kansas City, MO. He graduated in 1980 with a bachelor's degree in Elementary Education.

During college in Kansas City, Bruce started working as a bartender at the Cabaret and started, what would become a long career, in female impersonation. He continued bartending for many years at numerous gay clubs around Kansas City. He moved into Food Service and worked at the Central Exchange for 20 years as well as doing outside catering jobs all over the city. After the CX, he started working at NKC Health as the kitchen manager in the Children's Learning Center, where he retired after 16 years. The children there adored Mr. Bruce - they can still be heard complaining that the mac-n-cheese and green beans are not as good as Mr. Bruce's.

Bruce's female impersonation career as Melinda Ryder was iconic, he was a pioneer in drag, helping pave the way for female impersonators in Kansas City. Marking 50+ years in the industry, he has become a legend in the Kansas City LGBTQIA community as Kansas City's Original Redhead through his theatrical art, advocacy, and philanthropy. He, along with his spouse, have raised millions for charity over Melinda Ryders' career beginning with the AIDS Foundations, animal rescue organizations, Cancer awareness and research, and local not for profit charities. Melinda even turned Hamburger Mary's Kansas City Drag Bingo into a 16-year career of raising money and awareness weekly to support local organizations. Becoming the restaurants Matron!

Melinda Ryder commanded a stage, no matter where it was, and you couldn't help but be at awe. Whether it was in a local club or on-stage winning titles like Miss Gay Midwest America 1979, Miss Gay Kansas America 1982, Miss Gay Missouri America 1984 and he went on to become 2nd Runner up that year at Miss Gay America. Bruce was later recognized for his career as Melinda Ryder with an exhibit at The Museum of Kansas City, celebrating a 50-year career as 'Queen of Kansas City' that included a collection of costumes, images, and memorabilia. 'Arrive as a Star, Leave as a Star'

In 1981, Bruce met Kirk Nelson at a softball game where Bruce was a cheerleader. They started dating and had been together since 1982. Bruce and Kirk have a love not matched by many. They truly found each other's soul mates. They were married in 2012 and would have celebrated 45 years of being together in February 2027. Kirk made sure that Melinda Ryder was always at her best. Making almost all of her costumes, wigs, and doing her makeup for every performance. Kirk never left Bruce's side...not when he was 1st diagnosed in 2002 with cancer, during his transplants in 2005 and 2007, and not during the last 6-month battle of cancer where he sat bedside with Bruce every day. Their love and devotion are unwavering to the end. Bruce's infectious smile and robust laugh still filling the room if he was able...you know that laugh where he threw his head back and could be heard on the other side of the room?

Bruce is preceded in death by his father, mother, and older sister Nora.

He is survived by his spouse of 44 years, Kirk Nelson. His sister Lynn Winter and brother Paul Winter (Kelly); Nieces: Katherine Smith (Patrick), Maggie Fitzgerald (Austin), Ava Winter, Samantha Cook, Emily Winter, and Nicole Freeze (Mike); Nephews: Isaiah Winter and Shaun Crockett (Janelle); Great-nieces and nephews: Alexis DeVries (Dylan), Emma Crockett, Annie Freeze (Brayden), Audrey & Lanie Smith, Dominic & Hudson Cavanaugh, Nolan, Quinn, Margot and Roonie Fitzgerald plus cousins and MANY friends!

A Celebration of Life for Bruce Winter/Melinda Ryder will be held on Saturday, October 10, 2026, at the Unity Temple on the Plaza; 707 W 47th Street, Kansas City, MO. Visitation is from 2 pm - 3:30 pm and the Celebration is from 3:30 pm - 5 pm.

In lieu of flowers, please make donations to either Lazarus Ministries KC (www.lazminkc.org) or GLAMA KC (www.glama.umkc.edu)

Bruce/Melinda may have been 'Born a Star', but she left a LEGEND!