OBITUARY

Francis M. Greer

July 11, 1968June 4, 2018
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Francis M. Greer, age 49, of Bronx, New York passed away on Monday June 4, 2018. Francis was born July 11, 1968. Beloved husband of Lynn. Beloved son of Francis F. & Mary. Loving brother of Deborah & Michele. In lieu of flowers, contributions in Francis' memory may be made to American Diabetes Association and The National Breast Cancer Foundation.

Fond memories and expressions of sympathy may be shared at www.georgewerst.com for the Greer family.

Services

  • Visitation Friday, June 8, 2018
  • Visitation Saturday, June 9, 2018
  • Funeral Service Saturday, June 9, 2018
REMEMBERING

Francis M. Greer

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Shirley Chen

June 15, 2018

Shirley Chen

June 15, 2018

Fran,
Your passing was a shock and you will be missed greatly. “Those who we love don’t go away. They walk beside us everyday... unseen, unheard, but always near, still LOVED, still MISSED and very dear,”. This is what gets us through each day. You have been an integral part of Lynn’s life for 15 loving years and therefore part of ours too. We will miss you for your impact on us has been meaningful and unforgettable!
Until we meet again! We love you!
Shirley, Kenny, Bella & Max

Brian Fawcett

June 9, 2018

This week, I will say goodbye to a great friend!
I met Francis Greer at my first official job in Long Island City working for United Brass Works. It was basically just me and Fran working the supply house, all alone...just the two of us... You would think working in a warehouse was boring! Not with Fran! We had a daily routine of packing orders while listening to Howard Stern. Getting our work done early so we could spend the rest of the day playing chess, wiffle ball, video games, cleaning our cars, crosswords and the mandatory end-of-day jam session.
Outside the occasional nap, we accomplished so much there together. Fran would practice his knife skills during the day and go to school at night to become a chef. At my age back then, I never met someone so motivated, so driven.
He taught me some chords and encouraged me to join a band. He saved my life at a Nirvana concert - at least, that's what he told me... after he picked me up out of the mosh pit and carried me to the bar so that he could buy me an orange juice! I still don't know what happened...
Fran also helped me build my first computer which planted a seed for a long career after music had its run.
I'm so glad I got to spend all that time together with you. Without you there would be a huge hole in my life. I will always think of you as a friend. But you were so much more... a mentor, motivational speaker, brother and at times even a father.
You've touched so many peoples lives and I'm so grateful I was one of them. I just wish I had guts to tell you all of this a long time ago...with a big bear hug and grandma pizza to go along with it!
Thank you so much!!!
Love ya big guy!

Melissa Abramowitz

June 9, 2018

13 years ago you married my best friend and became a brother to us. You were one of the kindest, funniest, most generous men I knew. The perfect match for Lynn you were just two peas in a pod. The shock of your loss is overwhelming and there is a pain in our hearts that no words could begin to express. You were taken from us much too soon. I posted a picture of us in happier times....and one with the love of your life. We will miss you Fran (aka Fubar) and hold your memory close every day. Rest In Peace , friend and brother, until we meet again and laugh over “Cash is King” and our other little jokes. We will love you always and forever.

Lynn Greer

June 9, 2018

You passed away on June 4, the day before our 13th Wedding Anniversary. You were the love of my life and always will be. You were my best friend, my strength, my everything. Life will not be the same without you. I feel safe knowing that you are looking down on me and will be my guardian angel for the rest of my life until we can be together again. I love you today, tomorrow and forever. Rest In Peace my love.

Mary Greer

June 9, 2018

My heart is broken. My son, you were the joy in my life and I will miss you every day for the rest of my life.

Richard Greer

June 9, 2018

I was so taken back with the news of my cousin Francis Greer passing away today. I’m sure your up there jamming away with my pops on the guitars 🎸. Love you and miss you cuz. 😢

Debbie Niven

June 7, 2018

Dear, sweet soul.
Always smiling, ready to help, loving and kind.
You will be missed by so many whose lives you touched.
Eating brisket and chicken soup with matza balls without your cheers will never be the same.
RIP our dear Fran. 🙏🙏🙏
Debbie and a Mark Niven

BRIAN FAWCETT

June 7, 2018

BRIAN FAWCETT

June 7, 2018

Nintendo Wii Battle

Biography

The love of my life, Francis Michael Greer was born on July 11, 1968 in Queens, NY to parents Francis (better known as Frank) and Mary Greer. Fran, as he was called from an early age, had 2 sisters, Michele, 2 years older and Deborah, 13 months younger. Fran was extremely close to his family and they were always there for each other. Fiercely protective of each other and even when they had disagreements, they never let it fester for too long. “There is nothing more important than family” Fran would often say and as in all families, they may have disagreed and even fought occasionally, but in the end they always had each other’s back.
Fran was the same way with his friends. I would not say Fran was anti-social, but I will say that growing up Fran had a small, extremely close knit group of friends – Rob, Pat, Kevin, Mike M., Ron and Mike F. Often you would see women who grew up with close girlfriends, but rarely, would you see a group of men who met in grammar school, grow up, some moved miles away even in their formative years and still remain as close in heart as if they still lived in the same neighborhood. Always making time for each other and when one of these men were in trouble or pain, they would rally around and be there in a heartbeat. Fran would often say to me when suggesting that we go out with other people that were not in his immediate circle “I have enough friends”. Whenever one of his friends needed him, Fran was there – no questions asked and vice versa.
I met Fran through Yahoo Personals!. I responded to his personal ad in August 2003. We corresponded through e-mail and phone calls for a couple of weeks before I agreed to go out on a date with him. When I finally agreed to a date, being from Brooklyn, I suggested that I find the place and meet him there. Fran said “No, I got it”. I had no idea where he would find a place, since he lived in Glendale, Queens – a world away. A couple of days before the date I called Fran, who told me he had lost my phone # (no surprise there, since Fran loses everything). He asked me for my number and I told him if I had a good time on the date, I would give him my number after the date.
On August 29, 2003, I met Fran at Areo’s in Bay Ridge Brooklyn. I remember thinking how cute he was. The conversation flowed very easily and I found myself enjoying the evening very much. I remember thinking “why doesn’t he remove his sunglasses from the top of his head”. I don’t know if he was trying to be cool or not, but it was distracting. After dinner we went for a walk along the Shore. We walked and talked and after a little while, I saw a flash of lightning in the sky. I picked up the pace of my walking and explained to Fran that my worst fear was lightning, so we both started running back to my place. When we got to my front door, I handed him a piece of paper with my phone # on it. Since I had been dating through on-line personals for some time, my best friend, Melissa and I had a deal – I would call her after each date to tell her I was home safe and give her a report on how the date went. As Melissa, would later tell in her speech at our Wedding, I would always find something wrong with the guy I was dating at that time, however, after my date with Fran, I said to Melissa “You know, I couldn’t find anything wrong with him”. According to Melissa, she knew right there and then it was true love.
There is an episode of The Big Bang Theory (Fran and my favorite program) in which Leonard tells Penny he loves her and Penny’s reaction is “Thank You”, which led to a very awkward moment and an eventual break-up. My reaction to Fran telling me he loves me was very similar to Penny’s, although, it did not lead to a break-up. After a few weeks, Fran told me he loved me and I didn’t know what to say so I basically said nothing except that I needed more time. Fran looked visibly hurt. I didn’t want to hurt him, but I wanted to be sure of what I was feeling and not just say “I Love You” because he did. A week later I told him I loved him too. It was a beautiful moment.
Fran and I had a lot in common and enjoyed being around each other and as each day and month passed, we grew closer and closer and discussed a possibility of a future life together.
On August 28, 2004, Fran planned our first Anniversary celebration but since I am a person who is constantly trying to guess surprises (and often do guess). He found out from Melissa that I suspected he was taking me on the World Yacht Cruise, so instead of taking me there, he pulled up to my second guess – Rockefeller Center (I thought we were going to Top of the Rock at the top of Rockefeller Center). When he pulled up he said “Ha, you thought we were going here – wrong”, then he sped away and took me to the World Yacht. After dinner we went up on deck – it was a beautiful night out – looking over New York Harbor – it was very romantic. I was in love and happier than I had ever been in my life. At some point I was looking out over the water and when I turned around Fran handed me a box – I opened it up and there was a hat in it that said “GROOM”. Well, I was confused. When I looked back at him, he was down on 1 knee, ring in hand. I was so thrilled, that I pulled my cell phone out and started dialing people to tell them Fran asked me to marry him, but the only problem was – I had not given him an answer yet.
Within a week of the proposal I had the place booked, dress bought and just about every little detail for our Wedding planned. I have always loved to plan parties and events and could not wait until I was finally able to plan my own Wedding to the man I loved. The whole time I was planning our Wedding, I kept saying to myself “Am I Dreaming? Is this really happening?” It’s a very similar feeling right now, except, now I am saying “This is a nightmare. I am living in a nightmare and I just can’t wake up”. “How can Fran be dead? This is impossible”, but then reality sinks in and I realize I am not dreaming or having a nightmare – I am waking up each day with the same daymare as if I were sleeping. I walk through life in a constant state of haze because I can not believe he is gone.
On June 5, 2005, I married the man of my dreams in a traditional duel faith ceremony. We had both a Priest and Rabbi preside over the ceremony (which is ironic, considering the fact that Fran and I are both not religious), but to make both sides of our families happy we agreed to a dual ceremony. I remember the week before our wedding, it was freezing in New York. I prayed as hard as I could that come the day of my wedding, the temperature would be at least 75 degrees. I was wearing an off the shoulder, short sleeve dress and the ceremony was outside in a tent like structure and I wanted to be able to utilize the gardens as well. I believe I may have prayed a little too hard because the day of our wedding it was bright and sunny and 95 degrees on Long Island. We got married at a beautiful catering hall, The Swan Club in Roslyn, NY. I fell in love with the hall the moment I saw it. Fran was all about making his “Princess” (which is what he would call me quite often) happy. Everything that day went off without a hitch even with the 95 degree heat. Everyone was complaining about the heat, especially the bridal party, who had to pose for pictures in the gardens, dripping with sweat. Once the photos were done, it was inside to the reception, where it was nice and cool. We did not have an elaborate wedding or reception and there were less than 125 guests present, which to me was absolutely perfect. I don’t remember every single detail of that day and can’t even remember what food was served or even if I ate. However, I do remember the laughter, the joy, the bliss, the dancing, the friends, the family. All of these things will live in my head for the rest of my life and that day will go down in the record books as the best day of my life.
For our Honeymoon, we went on the first of many cruises (cruises would become our vacation destination of choice). This cruise however, will go down in history as the best cruise I ever had because it was with the love of my life, we had a Junior Suite and it was just the 2 of us. We went swimming with dolphins, enjoyed Broadway style shows on board and had perfect weather. I was happier than I had ever been in my life because I had finally met the man of my dreams. The man I would live with and grow old with.
Many people have said over the last few days that Fran and I lived more in 13 years of Marriage than most live in a lifetime. And I would have to agree with them.
Fran and I never had a lot of money saved at any one given time because we both thought it more important to spend it while we had it, sometimes on frivolous items but mostly on vacations. We both enjoyed traveling a lot and I was usually planning our next vacation while still on our current vacation. While we did occasionally travel alone, most of our vacations were with family and friends. We both enjoyed being around our families and friends and always thought “the more, the merrier”. Some of our more memorable vacations were:
2008: Vegas for his 40th Birthday Surprise
This Birthday would go down in the history books as the best event I ever through – not because of it’s elaborate place or event, but because it was a week full of surprises that I know I would never be able to equal or top. Since I am a person who likes to plan things very early, late in the Summer of 2007, I contacted Rob and asked him what he thought about going to Vegas for Fran’s 40th Birthday. He was all for it. He contacted all the guys and most of them agreed without hesitation. I contacted his Mother and Sisters who said yes immediately and even got some of my own family to do. I think we had close to 20 people going to Vegas. I arranged to have his party at the Bellagio buffet (which I had heard was the best buffet in Vegas). I had told Fran we were going away, but would not tell him where, except that he needed a Passport. There were so many surprises that week, I’m surprised Fran didn’t have a heart attack. As the week drew closer, I also informed Fran that he would need to pack a suit for the trip. His exact words to me were “whatever you have planned which requires me to wear a suit – cancel”. He would live to regret those words.
His sister, Michele dropped us off at JFK airport on the morning of July 5, 2008 at the Jet Blue Domestic terminal. When Fran saw we were not at International, he asked “are we going to Vegas”. I just smiled and he said “no way”. I asked the man doing our curbside check-in to please tell my husband where we were going – he confirmed that we had tickets to Vegas. After about a half hour sitting at the gate waiting for our flight to board, Fran sees some very familiar faces heading straight to us – his Mom and 2 sisters. Deborah said “you didn’t think we were going to let you fly off to Vegas without us, did you?”. We arrived in Vegas and checked into our Timeshare unit at the Flamingo resort. All of his friends and my family were all schedule to arrive within the next 24-36 hours so it was very hard to make sure we did not run into anyone else we knew until the party at the Bellagio, scheduled for Monday evening.
When we walked into the Bellagio on Monday evening, July 7, 2008, the look on Fran’s face is not one I am likely to ever forget. He was in total shock and amazement. All of the people that he cared about most in this world were all there to help him celebrate his 40th Birthday. During dinner, Rob gave a speech and during the speech he asked Fran to be best man at his wedding only 2 days later in Vegas. Fran and I looked at each other and he said “I guess I have to go buy a suit” – yep.
2013: Vegas/California:
We arrived in Vegas and rented a car and drove to LA. I had always wanted to see Los Angeles and we did all the typical touristy stuff – went to the Farmers Market, did a tour of Hollywood and Beverly Hills, went to see a taping of The Price is Right with Drew Carey and spent time with friends. We ended our trip in Vegas again and got to see the World Series of Poker being filmed live and met a Poker Pro – Chris Moneymaker (a highlight of our trip).
2017 & 2018: The 80s Cruise:
When Fran and I heard about the 80s Cruise, we both got very excited. This cruise was tailor made for us. Being teenagers in the 80s we both loved the music, the clothes, the TV shows from that era and when we heard about a cruise devoted to all things 80s we couldn’t wait to join it and the people on the cruise were so nice and nearly everyone was around our age and no children on the ship. We dressed up (or at least I dressed up) for the many theme nights they had and finally had a date for the Prom. We played trivia with Brad and Steve and even started listening to their Podcast when we returned home. These were the 2 best cruises we ever took (aside from our Honeymoon). On the cruise in 2017 Fran got to meet one of his teenage idols – Debbie Gibson (who was just as nice as could be, even having been swarmed by a starstruck Fran in the airport). She even liked one of the earrings I was wear (purple lightning bolts) so much that I gave her one and she autographed the other one for me and wore the one she kept on stage that night.
2015, 2016 & 2017: Saratoga:
In 2015, Fran and his friends were sitting around discussing possible vacations and the Saratoga Racetrack came up. All the boys were heavily into Horse Racing and would go to Belmont several times a year, but they wanted to see Saratoga, so they asked me to research house rentals in Saratoga, which I did. 5 couples would go and we rented a house right near the track the first year, but because we kept running out of room for people to sleep, we kept switching house, but finally in 2017 we found a house about 45 minutes from the track that would accommodate everyone and that was the house we would use going forward. Unfortunately, Fran and I only got to experience it one time and from what I hear, the gang, minus us, will continue the tradition.
Over the years, we always talked about what we would do when we retired (we were planning to move to San Diego. We both hated the long hard Winters in NY) and what we would want in the end (Fran always said he wanted to be Cremated and no Wake). I don’t think either one of us could ever have predicted that the end would come so early for him.
Yes, my husband had some medical problems. He was a Diabetic and had Hypertension. In 2014, immediately following another one of our amazing cruises, Fran developed a blister on the bottom of his foot that he ignored for quite some time. When it got to the point that he could not ignore it anymore, he went to his sister and showed her his foot. They immediately went to the hospital, where Fran was rushed into emergency surgery to save his life. He had to have half of his foot amputated. It was a long, long road ahead for Fran, but he was a trooper and took care of his health from that point on. It was a wake-up call for him.
Fran seemed to be doing fine the last few years and then we went on (what would turn out to be) our last cruise – The 80s Cruise in March 2018. A few weeks after the cruise, Fran had me make an appointment for a Dermatologist for him because he wanted to have the Mole on the side of his head looked at (per his sister Michele’s request) so off to the Dermatologist we went. While there, Fran mentioned that he had a little abrasion on his right nipple. The doctor took a biopsy of it and a few days later Fran called me in the office with the bad news – he had Breast Cancer.
I thought the foot was bad when it happened, but when Fran called me, I literally could not move – I was in shock. We immediately went to see a Breast Surgeon the Dermatologist recommended. Dr. Lynn Josephson, with Westmed was kind, caring and knowledgeable. She did a breast ultrasound that showed that the cancer did not look like it had spread and scheduled a Mastectomy for April 24, 2018. She had also told us that after the surgery, there would most likely have to be some kind of Chemo, but that would be for the Oncologist to determine. We checked in to White Plains Hospital on April 24, 2018 for the Mastectomy. Everything went very smoothly with the surgery. Dr. Josephson kept us apprised during every phase of the operation and the staff at the Hospital was top notch. When the surgery was over, Dr. Josephson informed us that no lympnodes were involved and that it did not look like the Cancer has spread. She also gave Fran the option to go home that day, but he opted to stay in the hospital one night for observation. He wanted to make sure everything was good and was being very cautious. The following day Fran came home and was on limited mobility and disability for 2 weeks.
I made an appointment with the Oncologist my Breast Surgeon had recommended because he was closer to us than the one Dr. Josephson had recommended, although, both were still affiliated with Westmed. Dr. Jarett Feldman informed Fran that Chemo was the best course of action. Even though their were no Lympnodes involved and it appeared that Dr. Josephson had removed all of the infected Cancer cells, it was Dr. Feldman’s professional opinion that in case there were microparticiples that were not seen with the microscope and to prevent the Cancer from returning when Fran was 70 years old, it was better to tackle it now. Fran was in agreement and we scheduled his Chemo to begin on Monday, May 21. Before the Chemo could begin Fran would have to go get a Metaport placement in his chest (a 30 minute routine operation done as an outpatient procedure). Although, Fran was confident about Westmed’s practice, we decided that a second opinion was in order so I made an appointment for Sloan Kettering on May 15. Fran’s Metaport procedure was on Monday, May 14. Sloan could not fit us in until that day.
On Monday, May 14, 2018 I got up like any other day and got ready for work. I asked Fran if he wanted me to go with him to the hospital and he said “No, go to work. I’ll be fine” so I kissed my husband good-bye and told him to call me when it was over. When I walked out the door that morning, I had no idea it would be the last morning I would share in that house with my husband. I had no idea that in just a couple of short hours my life would change so drastically, it would become unrecognizable.
His sister Michele was picking him up that morning to bring him to the hospital and she was late. I would text Fran periodically to see if she were there and the last text I received from my husband was “In car. Relax”. They were late getting to the hospital and just before they took him to surgery he called me. That would be the last time I would hear my husband’s voice clearly.
Hours passed by and I would call my Mother-in-law who was with Fran at the hospital and ask her for status updates. Finally after about 2.5 hours, I received a phone call from her with the Doctor standing near with a status update. He said they had a few problems, but the port was in and Fran was in recovery. In hindsight, I should’ve asked “what problems”.
Fran was not coming out of the anesthesia for a very long time and when he did finally awake, he said that he could not feel anything below the neck. The hospital staff said it was because of the anesthesia. When hours passed and he was still unable to feel anything, they decided to keep him overnight and run some tests. The first test they ran (before I got to the hospital) was a Catscan and from this test it was determined that Fran had Brain Cancer (which is what one of their Doctors on staff had told me). When I got to the hospital they were getting ready to take Fran down for an MRI. I kissed him good-bye and he told me to go home (it was very late). That was the last time I heard the sound of my husband’s voice. I waited for him for 2 hours, but when he did not return, I went home with my friends at 1:30 in the morning.
At 4:30 in the morning I received a phone call from one of the radiologists at White Plains Hospital who informed me that my husband had suffered a couple of strokes, a severed artery and compressed spine. I was devastated and ran back to the hospital.
On Tuesday, May 15, White Plains Hospital transferred Fran to Montefiore Medical Center because they had a Neuro ICU department that were better equipped to handle cases such as these.
Fran was in Neuro ICU for 3 weeks and while he was cognizant at times, he was also very heavily medicated and asked to be sedated most of the time as to not feel the pain.
Fran and I had many conversations over the years about quality of life and he always said to me “If I have no quality of life, pull the plug. I do not want to live the rest of my life as an invalid or in a wheelchair”. The Doctors at Montefiore were telling us that he would be in a nursing home for the rest of his life with a feeding tube. After being on the machines that were sustaining his life, Fran finally begged to have the machines turned off and asked all of us to just “let me go”. It broke my heart, but I knew it was what he wanted and although his sister Deborah was his Health Care Proxy, if a Psychiatrist had determined he was of sound mind to make his own decision there was not a thing Deborah could do about it.
The Psychiatrist first visited my husband on Friday, June 1 to give him a mental examination. Upon conclusion of her conversation with him, she had told me that because he was heavily medicated and on Morphine, she could not determine he was of sound mind. She said she would return on Monday, June 4 after he had been off all of the medication for 12 hours.
Knowing what my husband wanted in his last days made the next 72 hours unbearable. The minutes and hours ticked by until finally, Monday morning arrived and I had to make my way back to the hospital, knowing that today was most likely my husband last day alive. I arrived at the hospital at around 9:30AM, the Psychiatrist was due to see Fran at 10:30AM. When I arrived at the hospital I tried to get Fran to reconsider having the machines turned off and begged him to listen to the Psychiatrist regarding a possible life outside of the hospital. Faced with the very real prospect of losing my husband, I was now terrified of living without him. Fran had made up his mind and I could see that he had mentally checked out on me. When the Psychiatrist showed up, I was asked to stay for the first few minutes while she explained all of his options and then she asked me to leave. After about a half hour she came to find me and told me that he seemed to know exactly what he wanted and asked me if Fran and I had ever had the conversation regarding end of life procedures and I told her yes and that Fran had always said he did not want to be kept alive by machines. The Psychiatrist determined that it was not depression that was making the decision, it was Fran. She signed off on the paperwork that Fran was of sound mind to make his own decision. Shortly after 12:00PM, the doctors shut off the machines sustaining Fran’s life per Fran’s request. They told us he could live as much as 2 days on just the Oxygen they gave him.
At 5:45PM, I left the hospital. Rob was with Fran. I kissed Fran good-bye and told him I would see him in the morning. The next day was our Anniversary and I was really hoping and praying that Fran would live to see another Anniversary. While I was on the bus with my friend Jeanne, I received a call from Rob at 6:30PM. He told me to come back to the hospital – “Take a cab if you have to”. With no cabs or buses in sight, Jeanne and I ran back to the hospital. When we got there, it was already too late. Fran was gone. I collapsed onto the hospital floor in hysterics. Rob and Jeanne tried to calm me down, but I was too hysterical. The love of my life was gone and I would never know another. Rob told me “he waited for you to leave before he went to sleep. He did not want you to see him go”. This only made me feel worse. I wasn’t with him at the end. I loved this man and now I had to figure out how to go on without him.
Fran was cremated a week after he passed and now I must figure out how to pick up the pieces of my life.
I spent 15 years with this man and he died the day before our 13th Wedding Anniversary. He will be forever in my heart and in my soul.
Rest in Peace my Prince Charming.
I love you today, tomorrow and forever.
























We are insignificant.
In the whole of the infinite universe…we are insignificant.
This is not to say that we don’t have impact.
This is not to say that we don’t affect.
But in the grand scheme…we are insignificant.
The universe is beyond our comprehension…huge, immense, incredible…these words pale in comparison to the reality of the incomprehensible.
But we are insignificant.
An individual may have meaning to another. To a mother, a brother, a sister, a spouse….
Perhaps more than meaning…perhaps purpose, influence, focus, any number of things.
To any given individual, one person, one soul, may be significant…for a brief moment in the universe.
But we are insignificant.
None of us will move continents. None of us will change the course of planets. None of us will alter solar systems or galaxies.
We are insignificant.
Lives may be impacted and protracted.
Lives may even be subtracted.
But we are insignificant.
In this reality it is important to understand that, for those briefest of moments, we co-exist.
We can do so in harmony or discord.
We can cherish the existence or lament the torture of being here.
But we are insignificant.
What we do, we do, ultimately, for our own selfishness.
That selfishness could be for pleasure or pain.
For positive or negative.
But this insignificant goal gets us through this existence.
How we make use of the time we have…of the people we encounter…of the relationships we foster…that makes significance in the here and now.
And no matter how insignificant we may be in the grand scheme of the universe, for now, for here, for the people we have in our lives, the significance of the moment could be everything.