Jo Ann Renfro

Jo Ann Stevens Renfro, age 72 of Detroit, MI, (Indian Village) passed away peacefully on Tuesday, February 26, 2019. Jo Ann is the daughter of the late Kenneth Stevens and Claudia Croney. Jo Ann is survived by her beloved husband Richard Renfro of forty-two years and dear daughter Crystal Stevens. Jo Ann treasured her four grandchildren (Kendra, Justin, Tre, and Jordan) and six great-grandchildren. She leaves behind many family and friends whom will miss her dearly. Visitation will take place Friday, March 8, 2019 3:00 pm to 8:00 pm at the A.H Peters Funeral Home 20705 Mack Ave, Grosse Pointe Woods, MI 48236. Funeral services will be Saturday, March 9, 2019 2:30 pm at the Jefferson Ave Presbyterian Church 8625 E. Jefferson Avenue, Detroit, MI 48214. Jo Ann will lie instate at 2:00 pm. In lieu of flowers, please consider a donation to the National Stroke Association. Jo Ann was loved by everyone who knew her and will be deeply missed. Book of JoAnn A Loving Tribute to My Wife March 9, 2019 JoAnn and I first met in 1972, . JoAnn and I were both employed at Blue Cross/Blue Shield health care insurance company. At that time, the company had recently consolidated some of the satellite offices to the new building of East Lafayette, in Detroit. When we met, I had recently been promoted to a supervisor, and JoAnn had attained an important job during the two companies transition and consolidation. JoAnn worked as an administrative person in the health unit, which was located down the hall corridor from where I worked in the office services department of public and Staff Affairs Division. I first noticed JoAnn when I went to the health unit to check on any services they needed, or, if all of their required services were adequately met. JoAnn and another employee shared duties as receptionists. On this special day, JoAnn professionally greeted me in the health unit. She and I immediately smiled at one another. When JoAnn introduced me to her supervisor, I could hardly pay attention to what the supervisor said, because I have been thoroughly enamored with JoAnn. After returning to my office, I sat and stared out into space thinking about the beautiful face I have just seen in the health clinic. After that meeting, every time I had the chance I would go down the hall to take a peek into the health unit, hoping to see JoAnn. I thought falling in love is very far from my centered self. I had plans for myself. Of course, I never wanted to have a serious relationship with anyone. I was too busy trying to earn my way in the company, and the world. I thought if I allowed another person to close in my life it would complicate my Ambitions. All I wanted to do was have fun, enjoy life, and chase women. Until... One afternoon, JoAnn came in to my department! I had noticed her immediately when she came through the large outside entrance double doors. I thought she would make a left turn and go talk with my boss. She did not, but held her head high and began looking at me. JoAnn knocked on the window to my office, but remained standing in the doorway. Looking surprised at her, I said, "yes, please." JoAnn said she wanted to ask me a question. I had no idea what words would come out of her mouth. She asked me… "would you like to meet one of my friends." There was no hesitation in my reply. I said, "what about you?" I believe this caught her by surprise because she just smiled, and said shell get back to me later that was there and she left my department. Later, we met for lunch and ended up at my condominium, located down the road less than two miles East. We learned that we were both born and raised in "small-town America;" JoAnn from Fairmont, West Virginia, and me from Hamilton, Ohio. We learned she was born September 21, 1946; me January 1, 1946, both born in the first year of the "baby boom." We learned we both love to read. we discussed our families. We later discuss what we wanted to do with the rest of our lives. JoAnn told me she had long thought of working in the geriatric field of service, because she had a "special place in her heart for old people". I told her I planned to make a little bit of money to help pay for my return to college. We agreed that it was odd to have this kind of conversation so early in a relationship. But because we did have this conversational exchange, I became intrigued and even more curious about JoAnn. We were both looking for deeper connections. Well along in our relationship I told JoAnn I needed to find another job to help carry us forward. JoAnn said "that is okay, but well make it with each other." I began to think that she was right, because when we were apart, we had started to become so eager to see each other. Some of you may know the feeling Im trying to convey, when you think of the person all day and yearn, that is, cant wait to see and be around that person. I had never experienced anything like this in my life! Even as I write this tribute it is extremely difficult to stay focused and attempt to finish each word. It is been so hard to concentrate. I need to take frequent breaks. I am left with the thought and throughout our union we often told each other: "I Love You." This thought helps a little bit, but my pain is nearly unbearable!! My hurt is even more agonizing when I reflect on the way JoAnn suffered since she experienced or stroke. My vocabulary does not allow me to express the depth of my torment since her death. Ive prayed to God since May 2017, for some small amount of clemency… for my soul and well-being. Forty-five years is a long, long, long time, but too short for our love. As Ive thought and said recently, I now, understand why some people become drug addicts. No matter how small, God please have mercy. Right now, I feel as though my heart break is too much to bear. When people have battles in war, instead of killing each other, I believe, the most effective weapon to inflict on any enemy is to take away the people they love the most. As time went on, sometimes I worried that JoAnn cared more for me, than she did for herself. This is not healthy. Nevertheless, before, during treatment, and after JoAnns stroke we both laughed and told each other: "I love you." When JoAnn and I met in 1972, she was living with another person, but soon moved out of that house, on the west side of the city into her own apartment, on the east side of Detroit. We wanted to live closer to each other. I recall a big laugh we had one evening. After informing her of the trouble she had caused between other women and me. I told her that one woman I knew had broken the windows out of my car; and another had thrown a brick through the front window of the place where I lived. We laughed together really hard about these events. She said that is too bad but "thats what you get for messing around". The first Christmas of our love we drove to her hometown so that I could meet her parents, her mother and father. I recall that years after that particular trip we would get a big laugh when we discussed JoAnns geographical road expertise. JoAnn forgot to tell me about the fragile nature of the old rickety bridge we have to cross to get to her house. Although I did "stay" with her parents we were not allowed to sleep in the same room because we were not married. Her parents and I like each other. I got the opportunity to meet JoAnns daughter, Crystal, who is being spoiled by JoAnns mother and father. Later we planned to bring Crystal to live with us. We asked her several times. Crystal said "no" to all of our entreaties. So after discussing it with Joannes mother we left the situation alone. Not too long after my meeting JoAnns parents we traveled to Southern Ohio in order for JoAnn to meet my parents. Both my mother and father liked JoAnn a lot. My mother especially loved JoAnn, and JoAnn later told me that my mother was a beautiful person. Throughout our years together JoAnn has said, on several occasions, she believed my mother was an angel… "if there are angels on earth then your mother must be one of them." I have incorporated JoAnns comments into my section of my autobiographical story. JoAnn spoke at my mothers funeral. People who attend of the services commented on how well Joanna articulated her praise for my mother. JoAnn loved all people. JoAnn loved all animals. JoAnn did not even like to harm pests. She said, "they had a right to life just like everyone and everything else." We agreed that many times in life we liked animals more than people. On Valentines Day, February 14, 1977, after living together for a short while, we decided to make it permanent… forever! Both JoAnn and I attended college and graduated. In fact, although we did not attend the same schools, we were working in attending college at the same time. It was a tremendous struggle; not the book learning, but the effort to find jobs and "pay our own way." Both JoAnn and I, early on in our lives, thoroughly learned at the value of a good workout ethic. I believe this is another reason JoAnn and I were attracted to each other. JoAnn and I believed in improving our community and making the world a better place. After I left Blue Cross/Blue Shield in 1974, I got two separate jobs, one after the other selling insurance and afterward computer products. In 1976, criminals stole two of my automobiles (a second vehicle replaced but the first stolen), and I was fired from my computer job. We did not get reimbursed for the second loss. That summer, I informed an administrative-buyer at one of the colleges where I had maintained a small account that I would soon be terminated from my computer sales marketing job. That administrator put his arm around me and said, "that will be no problem for you Richard, we have a seat waiting for you here at the college." We both smiled, and that afternoon I registered and entered school for the fall term. I believe God was speaking to me on this occasion. I walked home, eager to tell JoAnn of our latest good fortune. I did, and we celebrated. Another one done and many more to get done. When I arrived at home that evening, JoAnn hugged and kissed me and said how happy we were regardless of what happens! I agreed! I believe this is about the time JoAnn and I began toasting each other for a good fortune- whatever the fortune might be. We believed in each other, we believed in God, and attended several different churches. JoAnn was raised attending a denomination, chosen by her parental grandmother. I attended an African Methodist Episcopal church in Ohio. When I told JoAnn about Miss Craig, a lady, for whom I help do chores, from approximately age four til her death at my age eleven, her age about 95 (according to nebulous records. I believe Miss Craig was older than the records reflect), in 1957 JoAnn cried. Miss Craig lived in an upper two room flat, of an old gray house, two houses from where I was raised. In the center of all-purpose room start in 1700s pot-belly stove. Her kitchen which reminded me of pictures of ancient wood structures I had seen in school text and old magazines, was located down about thirteen steep steps, and to the left of the main house. Miss Craig did not have running water, or a bathroom. Miss Craigs "outhouse" was located in the backyard of our property, near the alley, which paralleled the front houses on that street. Often I had to empty Miss Craig slop jar in the outhouse; "fetch" her coal and the block of ice for her icebox. Miss Craig quickly became my personal teacher for accessing the Bible, newspapers-and the world. Miss Craig attended at the same church my family attended. Miss Craig was very active in many church events. As I said, Miss Craig died when I was eleven years of age. I did not attend Miss Craigs funeral, since I had become afraid of dead people, having seen the inside of a funeral home when a neighborhood boy died. When telling JoAnn the story about Miss Craig, we discussed Death. Many years later, JoAnn helped me understand death better. JoAnn suggested and help me write a term paper to relate life and death to young students. JoAnn told me she began to understand death when her grandmother died, when JoAnn was very young. This was another time I learned of the deep feeling JoAnn had for senior people. I often wondered if she had chosen the right vocation. JoAnn assisted me when I composed the part of my manuscript pertaining to Miss Craig. JoAnn researched records related to Miss Craig and other items discussed in my story. JoAnn and I traveled to several places to document some of the sources for my story. We traveled to the sticks of Kentucky to search for Genealogy information related to we travel to my father and my mother. We traveled to Pennsylvania to look for information and records concerning Richard Allen and the AME church. While in Philadelphia, We attended Mother Bethel Church. We met the minister, his wife, and the other members of the church. We ate a small lunch in the basement of the church, and looked at the historical photographs, displayed on the basement wall, of some of the bishops of the African Methodist Episcopal church. We looked at the strong bust of Richard Allen, displayed in the church. JoAnn and I and others in attendance that day, saw a short movie, what showed how and why Richard Allen started the AME church. We met Richard Newman, the author of Freedoms Prophet, a book Newman researched and wrote concerning Richard Allens development and establishment of the AME church. When we attended that Sundays services, we observed how involved members of the Church were in the individual development of their children. JoAnn and I discussed my development to the church I attended in Ohio. JoAnn thought that this involvement by the church complemented very well the work done by parents, and the various schools, in the growth of the community children. I told JoAnn that this was a long historical interest of the AME Church that is, the development and welfare of children in the community. Richard Allen is buried in the tomb in the basement of the church. Although I am angry that JoAnn will not have the opportunity to read the final product of my autobiographical story, she is the person who has provided some of the motivation for me to finish. JoAnns help, JoAnns encouragement, JoAnns life, and our life together are the reasons I will complete my manuscript. I could see and feel the tremendous struggle JoAnn had after her stroke. JoAnn often related to me how difficult it was to remember and how difficult it was for her to read, she told me and another person, who worked for National Stroke Association, that she missed reading the most since her stroke. Several occasions during the evenings after I fixed our dinner and we said eating, the effort she made to feed herself, affected me to the point I would need to get up and leave the room, because I cannot bear to see her in that condition. When I return to my seat, JoAnn would get up, come to me, hug me, kiss me, and tell me how good the food was, thank me, and rub my cheeks with the back of her hand. JoAnn and I attended Jefferson Avenue Presbyterian Church for over thirty years. We have both volunteered in church and neighborhood community activities. JoAnn helped me devise a method to detect dyslexia reading affliction in several students, who attended "The Learning Tree." As church members can attest, at Christmas time, JoAnn especially enjoyed seeing happiness on the childrens faces when they receive their gifts. She told me, more than a few times, how happy this made her feel. I watched her wrap their gifts. It made her extraordinarily happy. Sometimes we will discuss the need for parenting. We agreed that people have become parents for other peoples children, and that sometimes in todays world school teachers take on the role as parental substitutes for some students. We agreed that many problems in society can be traced to the contributions and impact parents and teachers had on children. Because we were both very interested in the welfare of children we often discussed, in detail the associated problems, and what we can do to help. In fact after JoAnn stroke, we visited the school where we plan to help the students with the reading, and any other concerns the principals and teachers thought we could help with. JoAnn and I thought these interactions would be beneficial for the children and JoAnn. We discussed this with a local school principal. When I pursued my degree, JoAnn showed her excitement because she knew she would be attending some of the events during my student teaching, held for the parents and students. She especially enjoyed seeing my interaction with the students, and at Christmas events and performances by the children she became very interested in enthusiastic. At home, we discussed various aspects of the development of the students. Well JoAnn and I were both attending college we worked a number of different jobs; school college business manager, soliciting business to raise money for publishing school paper, bartender, waiter, painting, shoveling snow; juvenile girls organizations, Salvation Army, Herman Kiefer Hospital, accounting firms, passing out packets of various products, whenever and wherever requested. Both of us have volunteered in our community, and the city at-large. Right before JoAnn experienced her debilitating stroke, she volunteered to teach reading to both children and adults. JoAnn volunteered at Detroit Medical Center. When she received her identification badge she felt honored, and was very proud to wear it, and even prouder to speak to patients, and do whatever they requested her to do. Upon completion of my undergraduate degree, several federal law-enforcement organizations showed interested in my joining them. I said to JoAnn I think I will accept one of the organizations offer. JoAnn supported my decision; and told me she planned to attend paralegal school. We celebrated! While training for the job I eventually accepted, JoAnn attended one of my graduation ceremonies. Several years ago, JoAnn and I attended a retiree organization conference in Annapolis, Maryland. We had planned to attend other related events in coming years. When JoAnn completed her legal training, she began her employment at a well-known wall law firm and we celebrated. We celebrated with broad smiles on our faces, again after the company recognized her for her outstanding work. A few years after Joanne had her supervisor retired, we socialize with her supervisor and his friend. JoAnns supervisor died not too many years ago. we attended his funeral, and JoAnn spoke glowingly of her supervisor. JoAnn was an excellent speaker. I watched with much pride whenever she spoke at neighborhood functions, law events, and innumerable other functions. Right before JoAnn experienced her stroke, she attended several meetings related to our neighborhood. JoAnn tried to inform the younger and newer neighbors of some of the efforts the older neighbors had accomplished. I hereby recognize JoAnn for her many years serving as black captain, board administrator, and all the other dedicated effort she contributed to her neighborhood, to the city, and to the nation. People like you make the world a better place. JoAnn we love you! I love you thank you! What is life? Life is very short. It passes so quickly. "Life is like a walking shadow, a poor player that struts and frets his hour upon the stage, and then heard no more. It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing…" Words cannot adequately express the depth and breadth of my wretched extreme pain. I have at the opportunity of meeting many people from various groups and societies, from all over the world, never have I met a more loving, unselfish beautiful person as JoAnn. JoAnns true beauty radiates from the inside out. We must place JoAnn in the class of people who other people like immediately upon meeting them. Some people have said that a man often marries a person who is similar in some way, it to his mother. I never wanted to marry a person who was as loving as my mother. My mother had a habit of hugging every person she encountered. I had always thought that this was a bad idea- a bad trait… until I met JoAnn During the course of researching and writing a section of my book, related to genealogy, and some of which JoAnn helped me research, I asked her what she thought about my parents, she repeated what she had said to me earlier during our relationship, that "if there were angels on earth, then my Mother must have been one of them." I believe, in fact JoAnn was an angel herself. If angels meet in Gods heaven then my Mother and JoAnn will meet again God is gracious! I love you once: perhaps that love has yet to die down thoroughly within my soul; but let it not dismay any longer; I have no wish to cause you any sorrow. I loved you wordlessly, without a hope, by shyness tortured, or by jealousy. I loved you with such tenderness and candor and pray God grants you to be loved that way again. "I Loved You" by Alexander Sergeyevish Pushkin "the quintessential statement of the theme of lost love" in Russian Poetry. Richard Renfro

Funeral Home:

A. H. Peters Funeral Home of Grosse Pointe

20705 Mack Avenue

Grosse Pointe Woods, MI

US 48236