Carolyn Kay Van Gelder

Kay, the oldest daughter of Garret and Mabel Van Stelten, was a 1959 graduate of Ocheyedan High School. She also attended Worthington Community Junior College.

In 1960, Kay married her high school sweetheart, Gary Van Gelder. The couple celebrated 65 years of marriage. They held residences in Ames/ Nevada, Iowa; Columbia, Missouri; and Houston, Texas.

If her family members or friends were asked about Kay’s best attributes, they would most likely not begin with stories of her travels, how she always caught the biggest fish, or the fact that she could transform a New York Times recipe into dinner that very night. Of course, she did all those things, but they wouldn’t start there.

They would begin by telling you of her fierce love for others, of her unwavering support and encouragement, her steady and ever-present courage through all adversities. These gifts are the ones that will be cherished.

Kay created beautiful things that reflected her love for nature. Through gardening, handcrafts, and pieced quilts of museum quality, her choices of colors and patterns reminded us of the natural world. While others sought the mall, she could be found browsing The Whole Earth Catalog.

She had a lifelong curiosity about history, natural science, and politics as well as an appreciation of classic and contemporary literature. Her active interest in genealogy led her to become the family’s historian. Kay spent years researching and compiling stories about the family’s ancestry while documenting births, deaths, marriages, and locations.

For decades, Kay was a bird watcher, carefully noting the name, time, and place of each sighting. Her enthusiasm caught on with others, prompting bird discussions especially when an unusual bird was sighted. Her lifelong list detailed 145 individual birds, a significant number.

Her care of others was expressed through her deep love of family and countless years of selfless volunteering for MAM (Memorial Assistance Ministries), an organization that provides food, clothing, shelter, and career opportunities for the Memorial area in greater Houston.

Daughters Kelly and Kate flourished with the strong foundation of their home and grew to be outstanding, independent women with much to offer the world. They have brought inspiration and joy into this family through their spouses and children.

Kay will be greatly missed, yet her legacy continues by those who remain: husband, Dr. Gary Van Gelder of Houston, Texas; daughter, Kelly Margaret and husband Alex Shapleigh of Seattle, Washington and children Garret and Glenn; daughter, Kathryn Sue and husband Gil Phipps of Asheville, North Carolina, and children Grace and Liam; sister, Connie Dheere and husband Bernie of Lee’s Summit, Missouri, and children Jill (Peters), Sara (Reis), and Benjamin Clark; sister, Nadene Eller and husband John of Urbandale, Iowa, and children Matthew Wennerstrom, David Wennerstrom, and Megan (Thompson); brother-in-law, Doyal Van Gelder of Elko, Minnesota, and children Jamey, Charity (Conti), Terry, and Jesse; brother-in-law, Craig Van Gelder and his wife Barbara of Rhododendron, Oregon, and children Marcus, Peter, and Andrew.

Kay is preceded in death by her parents, Garret and Mabel Van Stelten of Ocheyedan, Iowa; her parents-in-law, Arthur and Marge Van Gelder of Ocheyedan, Iowa; infant twin daughters; sister-in-law, Debbie Van Gelder; and brother-in-law, Todd Wennerstrom.

No service is planned at this time. A future internment will take place at Ocheyedan Township Cemetery, Iowa.

In lieu of flowers, Kay’s family suggests:

Texas State Parks @ tpwd.texas.gov

Memorial Assistance Ministries @ mamhouston.org