Martha "Martie" Lane (Hoevel) Eftink

To everyone, she was Martie, though she was born under the name Martha Lane Hoevel in St. Louis in 1953 to Cora Lane Hoevel (nee Harris) and Chester Paul Hoevel. Her mother (who was called "Jimmie") was from Cape Girardeau and her father from St. Louis. Martie grew up in both Kansas City and St. Louis and graduated from Parkway Central High School where her vivacious personality led to her being named the President of the Pep Club.

Martie went to the University of Missouri at Columbia where she often told people she got her "MRS." Martie majored in kindness and storytelling. Through either serendipity or divine providence she met her future husband, Gerard, on a blind date in Columbia in 1979. They married on June 7, 1980 and moved to Kansas City where they lived together as a couple for just short of 41 years. In fact, their 41st Anniversary would be two days after her Celebration of Life (don't call it a funeral).

Martie first worked with insurance agencies, until 1983. Her work as a 9 to 5 employee ended for good when Rachel was born and (as if it were a sign to her from God) her employer that same month announced it was moving its entire office to Cincinnati. Martie always found time for her family, and for years she found part time work that gave her joy. It is not surprising that much of her work was done for free. She often worked with little kids, as a room mother for her own kids, a Girl Scout leader, a fund raiser, or event organizer. Martie was valued because people recognized she was the rare person who did three things well all at the same time: (1) she had a star quality that she used to entertain people both young and old, forcing them to smile, (2) she always did the hard, thankless work, and (3) she was great at organizing while happy to be co-leader rather than the titled leader.

Whenever Martie was asked to get up and speak to a group, she would not skip a beat. Her speaking style was to take real events and give them a funny, often self-deprecating, twist. Many people still remember her stories fondly.

After working on these volunteer projects involving kids, she was offered paying jobs and nonpaying positions away from the kids' school, but it had to be part-time so she could be there for her own kids, and their friends.

Martie loved to research and write. When asked to be in leadership for the Junior League, she volunteered to be the librarian, and she became a great librarian. She wanted this job because she decided to go through their archives and write about their history. For four years she wrote a column called "Past Times" that was published in a Junior League magazine. It was an educational column which told readers about the great history of this league of women. She loved it.

Next she was offered a job with the Career Management Center, where she was acknowledged in published books as a valuable assistant to the author. She was also a contributor to cookbooks. She spent much time in the kitchen experimenting for her family, with the greatest of success.

Martie then worked several years in a preschool where she received recognition as a great storyteller for the little kids. She loved this job, and all the children, as well.

After this she took a different kind of job, working outside at Adventure Woods. She was chosen for her ability to work with kids, as a counselor and team building leader. Being healthy and full of energy to burn at the time, she jumped into the task. She led adolescents through challenge courses, working on team building skills.

Martie's last part time work was as a research assistant and trusted helper at the law firm of her husband. People often commented that she was the sweetest legal office worker they ever talked to. It was probably true.

Martie loved to compose with words. She honed her craft so as to best affect her audience, to bring them happiness. This is seen in her many letters, her assistance to others writing, her storytelling to children, and in the anecdotes that she told people in conversation. Years ago, Martie even volunteered to write letters of recommendation to help girls get into sororities in college, even if she barely knew them. She even wrote thoughtful notes to people when their pet died. She looked for what some of us may think were small things, and tended to them. Martie often used a metaphor about the Little Bus. She downplayed her own abilities by saying she had been riding on the Little Bus, in school and in life.

Her first love was being a wife and mother. She inspired her family, acting just like that pep club president from years ago. Anything she loved outside of the home had to be limited to part-time so she could first share her love with, and be present for, her family.

Martie kept thank you letters she received, putting them in containers the family has recently started going through. It is truly remarkable how many thank you notes were written to her, from both adults and kids. And she kept every one, for the words on those pieces of paper were special to her. Many said how much she inspired them with her team building skills, how her research and writing was great, how nice she was to them, how she seemed to recognize their need, or how her acts of kindness will be long remembered. All might be thought of as small things, but all are remembered.

Martie ended the strenuous outdoor work at Adventure Woods when Rheumatoid Arthritis was first felt in the year 2000. Then in 2015 she was diagnosed with Congestive Heart Failure, and in the last few years a pacemaker/defibrillator was implanted. She continued with a very much scaled back life, concentrating fully on her grandchildren. The last few years, people would not have known she was once running kids through obstacle courses in the woods, helping people write books, helping her husband with challenges at his law firm, and speaking publicly, all while getting an "A" in raising her kids.

Martie wanted to be loved, was loved, and gave love back. That was much more important to her than money. She never really asked about money, and she saw no reason why she should not work for free.

Martie is survived by her husband of over 40 years, Gerard ("Gerry"), her daughter Rachel Lane Cary of Omaha, her son James G. Eftink of Lake Winnebago, her four grandchildren, Jocelyn Lane Cary, Aiden James Cary, Anna Lane Eftink and Ellie Jane Eftink, her-son-in law BJ Cary, her daughter-in-law Lauren Eftink, her brother Paul Hoevel, and her sister Ann Howard, along with their spouses, Julie Hoevel and Steve Howard, her nephew Chris Hoevel, her niece Michelle Hoevel Smith, her mother-in-law Matilda Eftink, and her husband's siblings Bobby Eftink, Maurice Eftink, Marion Eftink, Mary Beth Corgan, Kathy Walker, Patrick Eftink, Joanie DeLisle and Eric Eftink, their spouses, and their children and grandchildren. Martie will join in heaven with her mother Cora Hoevel, her father Chester Hoevel, her father-in-law Robert Eftink, her sister-in-law Susan Eftink, and her beloved cocker spaniel, Sparky.

The light shined brightly for long, flickered, then appeared to go out, but it is simply that we cannot now see it.

CHARITABLE DONATIONS

Martie liked flowers, but she observed that the cut flowers have to soon be thrown away, while charitable contributions help others and therefore should be preferred.

You may consider charitable donations to the following organizations which would help people who are faced with the same challenges that Martie endured:

For Arthritis (including Rheumatoid Arthritis):

Arthritis Foundation

For online donations - www.arthritis.org

For mail - 1355 Peachtree St. NE, Suite 600, Atlanta, GA 30309

For heart disease (including congestive heart failure):

American Heart Association

For online donations - www.heart.org

For mail - 7272 Greenville Ave., Dallas, TX 75231