Almost your 31st birthday, Dev. 
Still missing you everyday. 
Love, 
Mom

I love you, Deven, my favorite. 
Missing you everyday. 
Love, mom

I’ve been putting off leaving a memory because I don’t want this to be real. I keep hoping it’s just a horrible nightmare and I’ll run into him humbly proving a point to someone who is trying to outtalk him on a topic. I still think of Deven as the brilliant, young teenager I last saw him as. He never grew up in my mind and would forever be this child prodigy we all grew to love him as. I loved how we could have a random conversation with each other. That’s what happens when you put two self proclaimed oddballs together. I’m sad I didn’t get to know him more. I think my last time seeing him, we were camping on the beach and he insisted on being the resident “sweeper” making sure the sand wasn’t all over the place. We all joked about it the entire weekend and he’d try sweeping all of our feet off before we walked into the RV. My heart breaks so much for everyone in his life. His personality and aura was as deep as the ocean. He will be missed so much. I pray for his gentle soul to be at peace. I’m sending endless healing vibes and love to the rest of the family. You are in my heart and prayers. I hope you can celebrate the happiness and smiles he was able to give everyone he crossed paths with during his time here on Earth. 

[Part 2] 

Everyday, we would leave work and start driving home and see Deven walking. Everyday we offered him a ride. Everyday he said that he was fine. This went on for over a month. We eventually pulled over one day and jokingly said, “Get in the car. We have candy.” And Deven surprised us by getting in. We drove him to the bus stop and talked along the way. We found out he was going to spend an hour getting to his house on the bus. After several trips we found out that he only lived a couple miles out of our way, and so we started driving him home in the mornings.

When our offices moved up to North Austin, we started driving him to work, too. Deven was a proud man and always wanted to pay his share, but Regina was a mothering type who didn’t want to accept his money, so after throwing in for gas a couple of times, Deven learned it was easier just to let her enjoy his company and that this was more than sufficient payment for giving him a ride. This arrangement worked well for several years until he moved north and we moved to Manor. By that time, he had his truck and was able to get himself to work. Drives weren’t quite as much fun. We missed the camaraderie. At one point we talked about getting a place together and sharing the rent. But that never happened.

It became a habit to take Deven out to breakfast about once a month after work. Again, he tried to pay his own way, but Regina wouldn’t hear of it. Even after we stopped driving him, we still made time for breakfast.

As I said, my relationship with Deven was rather sedate and serious. I was the one who said the things that they couldn’t or wouldn’t say. But Regina had a completely different relationship. She thought of him as her best friend, a little brother and a son all rolled up into one. Their relationship was more loud and brash and they said things to each other that they would never have said to anyone else.  [Continued next post]

This is the eulogy I delivered for Deven at his memorial:

Deven was my best friend. I don’t know that he would say the same for me, but that’s how I saw him. I know you’ve probably read this in my comments on his obituary page or his Facebook memorial page, and I don’t wish to be redundant, but it’s an important thing to me, to be reminded that he was the person closest to me in this life because I miss him constantly.

Deven was a very private person, and I don’t think he really opened up completely to anyone. To me, he was someone I could share my thoughts and concerns with, someone I could go shooting with, someone I could talk to about music, books and politics with. Deven had a way of keeping me grounded and always knew when to stick a pin into my balloon to keep me from getting too far from reality. I loved him like he was my brother, or as if he were my son. It’s too bad he didn’t like the Beatles, he might have been perfect.

Deven was smart. I mean he was genius smart. He was intelligent at a level that few of us are. It made for some very interesting conversations about the meaning of life, the universe and everything. Regina, Deven and I used to have some crazy conversations when we would drive him to and from work. I have to admit, when Regina and I moved to our new house, and Deven moved to a new apartment and driving in together was no longer possible, it made the ride to work a little less joyful.

I always knew I could count on Deven. If there was something I needed help with, I knew that Deven would be there. Deven was there when we moved and needed help packing and getting things to our new home. Deven was a perfect example of what it means to be a friend.

I remember when I first became friendly with Deven. We worked out of a building on Airport Commerce. Deven would take the bus to and from work, and the bus stop was about a mile away from work. Everyday, we would leave work and start driving home and see Deven walking. [Continued next post]

Deven was my best friend. I tried to think about who else in my life might hold that designation aside from my husband, but to be honest, he was my closest friend, and therefore best. He would not say the same about me, and I'd never expect him to. I know that he had many good friends, though, and that's because he was such a wonderful person. He never had any trouble getting along with anyone. That's part of what made him amazing. 
I'm glad to have had the chance to know Deven. I admired and envied his ability to come up with the most witty thoughts and responses on the fly even if a lot were sarcastic and many poked relentless fun at me. It was something I enjoyed and had come to expect.
Deven was definitely smarter than I, and he was also better at his job than I was. I'm admitting it now, and I hope he somehow sees this and makes fun of me for it like I know he would. 
Deven, I miss you. I love you with all my heart like a brother, a friend, a son, and a confidant. Ours was a strange friendship, but I treasured it. You will never be forgotten. I will miss all the memes and images you would link me to freak me out. I will miss the relentless teasing and name-calling. I will miss someone reminding me how old I am in one breath while identifying as an 83-year-old attack helicopter in another. 
I will miss your help when I can't seem to get something right at work. I'll miss you making fun of me after providing the aforementioned help. I'll miss how you would tease me about breaking things because you know I can't stop exploring all the functions of our new tools at work. 
I'll miss 2:00 AM. I'll miss having breakfast with you at Jim's some mornings. I'll miss having you come over to play games or eat a Thanksgiving feast. I'll miss embarrassing you on your birthdays by decorating your desk as if we were high school besties. 
I don't know what else to say, but it still doesn't seem like I said enough. I miss your presence, and I always will.

I worked with Deven on the overnight team at TNI for a year. He was a fantastic supervisor and an all around good guy. We had many conversations on the overnight team and I remember them fondly. When I took my promotion at work he was the one who helped me get through it all and offered up words of encouragement to stay with the company. To hear of his passing is heart breaking especially to this old man. Thank you Deven. Vaya con dios

I met Deven when he was a young teenager. That boy could outwit most adults, even back then! He thought on a different level than most people  and was extremely intelligent. I would have conversations with him where his knowledge and outlook could rival most educated adults. I realized where he inherited that natural  intelligence on the night that I played trivia with his mom, my sister-in-law (true story). 

Since I know there is nothing that could ever be said to lessen this heartache, I’ll simply express this... Jana, Mercades and everyone else who knew and will always love him, I’m so sorry and heartbroken for your immense pain and unbearable loss. I’m thinking of and praying for all of you every single day. 

Tara 

My Condolences, thoughts and prayers to the family. He was a great, respectable, soft spoken gentleman. My heart breaks for the family.  

Deven was my best friend.  I don't know that he would say the same of me,  but to me he was one of the most important people in my life. 

Having him around made the late night hours at work something to look forward to. 

Deven was smart,  witty and wry. We always joked that we should record our commute conversations for posterity. He was always able to make me and my wife laugh. 

He had a dark sense of humor and was always able to twist a concept in such a way as to make one look at it in a completely new way. 

I don't want him to be gone. There is a void in my heart that will never go away. I want him back at work, telling me that I made things awkward. I want to go back to the range and shoot the rifle he built with him again. I want to sit at breakfast and talk about how he didn't like the Beatles. 

I want to be able to say good-bye.  I dont want him to be gone. He barely lived. I want to wake up from this nightmare and tell him about it and have him laugh at me and call me gay. 

I want him back. 

OBITUARY

Deven Lee McGehee

November 9, 1994 – May 16, 2019

Weed-Corley-Fish Funeral Homes & Cremation Services

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