Theodore James O'Neill

Born on January 25—a birthday he shared with his mother, Mildred—Ted was the third of five sons born to Mildred and Hugh O’Neill and raised in Brooklyn’s Bedford-Stuyvesant and Bushwick neighborhoods. When Hugh passed in 1950, older brothers Hugh and Douglas stepped into the role of family heads, ensuring the survival (and relative good behavior) of Ted and younger brothers, Kevin and Lawrence.

All the O’Neill boys shared a talent for drawing, a gift from their father. Ted credited his skeptical streak to his mother and the Protestant sensibility she brought to their Catholic household. Though she never converted, Mildred ensured her children were raised in the Church—earning one priest’s praise as “the best Catholic mother in the parish.”

Ted earned a place at Regis High School in Manhattan, where he often joked that when he walked into a classroom full of fellow “noble hearts,” he instantly sensed the lowering of the average IQ in the room. After graduating, he attended Fordham University, enduring a three-hour daily commute that left a stronger impression on him than his coursework. He went on to earn a Master’s in Mathematics from the University of Rochester and spent a year teaching math at SUNY Oneonta. It was during his stay in Rochester that his life’s direction was changed forever, for he had the great fortune of meeting and falling in love with Joan Morton. In 1965 they were married in Joan’s hometown of Fulton, New York.

Following a brief academic stint at Washington University in St. Louis, Ted and Joan—now expecting their first child, Ted—moved east. Ted began a 34-year career in information technology with General Electric in Pittsfield, Massachusetts, while Joan pursued early education. Their daughter Laura joined soon after, and life in the Berkshires was rich with hiking, canoeing, snowshoeing, Tanglewood picnics, and all the environment had to offer.

In 1979, the family relocated to Madison, Connecticut, where Ted commuted to GE’s corporate offices in Bridgeport and Fairfield, often being sent across the country and occasionally abroad. He thrived during the Jack Welch era, but when his meticulous planning helped GE survive the feared Y2K apocalypse, he found he’d worked himself out of a job—and into a well-earned retirement.

Retirement suited him. Ted filled his days with home projects, chess, birdwatching, drawing, reading, boating, and cycling. Lots and lots of cycling. He also volunteered for Recording for the Blind and Dyslexic, the Madison Land Conservation Trust, and the Scranton Memorial Library, where coaching the Young Children’s Chess Club and Destination Imagination teams brought him tremendous joy and many great stories.

After 56 years of marriage and adventure, Ted lost Joan in 2021. He is survived by their son Ted and wife Etsuko Nakamura of Tokyo; daughter Laura and partner Patrick Nauseda of Gloucester, MA; his brother Lawrence and wife Diane Sonde of Brooklyn, NY; sisters-in-law Joan (Niantic, CT) and Marie (West Hempstead, NY); and many beloved nieces and nephews scattered across the country.

Visiting hours will be held Friday, October 31, from 4–6 PM at Swan Funeral Home in Madison, CT. In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to the Madison Land Conservation Trust, the Scranton Memorial Library, or Madison Community Services, Inc.