Silent, Strong Dad

He never looked for praises
He was never one to boast
He just went on quietly working
For the ones he loved the most.

His dreams were seldom spoken
His wants were very few
And most of the time his worries
Went unspoken too.

He was there…A firm foundation
Through all our storms of life
A sturdy hand to hold on to
In times of stress and strife.

A true friend we could turn to
When times were good or bad
One of our greatest blessings
The man that we called Dad.

In Loving Memory
          Dad


When I hear the words creative, smart, and caring, I immediately think of my dad. He was a man who truly loved and cared about his family. My dad lived a simple life never asking for much or for anything in return.
 
I loved my dad very much and have so many fond memories growing up. One, in particular, was when I was about 6 years old going to Angels Hardware and Lumber with my dad to get all the supplies needed for him to build my custom playhouse. I can still remember the smell of the wood as we both traveled down the aisles to purchase what was needed to complete this project.
 
Other fond memories include going camping at Crystal Lake, surprising me with my first doggie named Charkie, making my handmade gavel when I became Honored Queen for Job’s Daughters, and most importantly, the day my dad walked me down the aisle and kissed my cheek on my wedding day. These special memories that I shared with my dad will forever be cherished in my heart for the rest of my life.

My dad had a compassionate heart when it came to the love of animals. My dad rescued quite a few animals in his lifetime. It was just in his nature to care for those who cannot care for themselves. The night before my dad passed away, he rescued a little kitten and brought it home to my mom. Sadly, that would be his last good deed on Earth and the last time we would see my dad alive. We have named the little kitten Denny in honor of our father. I know little Denny is going to bring a bright light to our family, especially for my mom.

Dad, as you entered the gates of Heaven, I can only imagine that all your little pets who are now at Rainbow Bridge formed a welcoming line as you were reunited with your mom, dad, brother Jimmy, and all our loved ones having the happiest reunion in Heaven where there is love, peace, and joy with our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. This is not the end, but only the beginning of eternal life and many great things to come. I love you with all my heart and soul. You will definitely be missed, but never forgotten. Dad, until we meet again, you will be our little angel in Heaven watching over us as you did here on Earth.


A few days later after my dad’s passing, Louie and I were outside with our little fur babies asking Jesus for a sign that my dad was by his side in Heaven. I immediately was thinking, show me the white butterfly; that was the sign for my grandfather that he was in Heaven. I’m not exaggerating, a few seconds later, a white butterfly suddenly appeared from my neighbor’s yard and flew right past me. I was overwhelmed with emotion.  I thank Jesus every day for bringing us peace and comfort during this difficult time and showing us signs that my dad is in Heaven. 




My father wasn't the type of person to show his emotions or express how he felt but under that tough exterior was a man who loved his wife, children, grandchildren and great grandchild. He didn't have to say it in so many words because he expressed it with his actions and concern for all of us. 

As a child, I remember my dad being up with me at night when I was sick. He was a worrier and that didn't change when I became an adult with children of my own. His love and concern passed on to my children. When I would leave my parent’s house after visiting, my dad would always tell my mom “watch her, make sure she gets in the car.”  In addition, he worried about his grandchildren and would ask about them and want to know where they were and what they were doing. He loved to see videos of his great grandson Aaron that I had on my phone. However, he would get so frustrated when he would touch the screen and the picture would disappear. He could never figure out how my phone, Facebook or Instagram worked.

Memories of my father include.... him calling me Moosy Boo when I was a little girl, camping trips to San Onofre State Beach, and going on deliveries with him when he worked at Baby Toytown. I remember   watching Laurel & Hardy with him and also the time he painted our room lavender. He was also very generous and bought me my first car when he hit the pick six at the race track!

I remember he liked to barbecue and he also made delicious chili beans and homemade wontons. As an adult, I would still bring my london broil to him to barbecue because he knew exactly how to barbecue it. 

I remember him walking me down the aisle at my wedding and him coming to the hospital to meet each of his grandchildren when they were born. I will also never forget the joy in his face when my children would come to visit him.

My father was a simple man, he didn't have or want a lot of materialistic things. He wasn't very social but loved spending time with his family. He especially loved spending time with his grandchildren. On his birthday he would always tell us not to buy him anything, His perfect birthday celebration would be to have his grandchildren come to the house and bring him a pastrami sandwich from the Hat or a pizza from Petrillos, those were his favorites. 

My father’s passing was unexpected, I wish I had the chance to say goodbye and let him know how much I loved him and how blessed I was to have a father who cared for me and my children as much as he did. He may not be with me physically, but he will live on in my heart and memories forever!



Behind his tough exterior, my grandfather was a kind man who cared for his family. His affectionate gestures may not have been grand, but they meant something. For instance, I remember walking to my grandparents house every day after middle and high school. When I walked in, my grandfather would stop whatever it was he was doing (usually watching the news), go to the kitchen to grab a cold drink, snacks, and a give me a neck rub. This was his character, he didn’t have much, but what he did have he would give to his family. I truly admired his selflessness and it's this attribute I hope to carry on. 

I remember going over to my grandfather's house on his birthday and dropping him off a sandwich from the hat and just talking about what we've been up to. He was always interested in what we had to say and always looked out for our well being.  

Family Chain

We little knew that morning,
God was going to call your name.
In life we loved your dearly,
In death we do the same.

It broke our hearts to lose you,
You did not go alone,
For part of us went with you,
the day God called you home.

You left us beautiful memories,
Your love is still our guide
And though we cannot see you,
You are always by our side.

Our family chain is broken
And nothing seems the same
But as God calls us one by one
The chain will link again.

Author: Ron Tranmer


I have been blessed for 29 years to have the grandfather I did, he always had us on his mind and cared about us very much. He would always ask about work and if I said something dangerous, he let me know he didn’t like it. He was always looking out for our safety. There is a special place in my heart for my grandpa because I spent a lot of time with him when I was younger, and I got to know him. I remember he used to pick me up from preschool, sometimes we would walk home and he’d tell me about some of the things he used to do around the neighborhood when he was a kid. We used to paint and build little things at my grandparents' house, it was nothing specific but he would get me any little things I needed as I kept building. I used to make water messes on the sink pretending it was the ocean with an old TV dinner tray being the boat. I thought I was going to get in trouble but instead, he brought blue food coloring to make it look more real. He did everything he could to show he cared. As time with on we would go watch the horse races at the Santa Anita track and the car shows. I wish I would have learned more about how he picked horses. I thought it was so cool how he would look at the horses walk by then speed away to make his picks and be in the chair before the race began. At car shows he would talk about all the cars he owned and how much he bought and sold them for, which always left me speechless. Being in my late 20’s it was nice having conversations with him being able to understand more and realizing how similar we are in some ways.  My wife Carla and my son Aaron were also loved very much by my grandpa, he would ask how they were doing constantly.  I share the same middle name Stephen like my grandpa. When my son Aaron was being born and we were choosing names it was a no brainer to give him the same middle name, that's how much I cared about my grandpa and how much he meant to me. Thank you grandpa we miss you, we love you, and we’ll see you later.


Visiting the Abernathys was something we always looked forward to. That was when I would get to see my cousins - Dennis and Jimmy, and Aunt Annadell and Uncle Abe.

I remember wondering on the long,long drive from Concord what sort of rascally mischief the boys would be up to this time - it was always something new. Usually it was new ways to tease and torment me, the youngest of the cousins there.

Annadell would share stories with Mick about the things that had happened since we were last there,  like the time Dennis took Grandma’s expensive new tube of ointment and squeezed it all out. I can’t recall now whether he squeezed it into the toilet or on the floor, but at any rate, Grandma was without her new ointment, and not too thrilled about it!

I remember a little house or maybe a shed, that was in the backyard at Annadell’s house. Dennis and I played marbles in the dirt back there. He showed me the first ‘boulder’ marble I had ever seen, a beautiful old cat’s eye type, only filled with many little swirls, all were different colors. It was stunning.  I was not able to win it from him, however.

I remember my dad commenting that Dennis was a natural artist - he could pick up a pencil and draw a perfect circle. I guess artisitic talent runs in the family. Our Aunt Violet did a lot of drawing and painting, and I was a professional graphic artist. My brother Fred could also just pick up a pencil and render people and things.

I recall that he placed second in a Freckle King contest. He was blessed with an abundance of them.

But these are just a few of the memories of I have of my cousin Dennis. He was funny, he was a rascal. Mostly I remember lots of laughter, food (especially avocados) and good times when we all gathered at Ann’s house, and the tears when we had to leave. Lots of love.

Aloha,
Vicki


I THOUGHT OF YOU WITH LOVE TODAY

I thought of you with love today,
but that is nothing new.
I thought about you yesterday,
and days before that too.
I think of you in silence,
I often speak your name.
All I have are memories
and a picture in a frame.
Your memory is a keepsake,
with which i'll never part.
God has you in his keeping,
I have you in my heart




Diane, Jennifer, Allison,
     Thank you for inviting me to the beautiful memorial and celebration of Dennis’ life.  I have many memories of Dennis and all of you as I spent much time with your family as Robert’s girlfriend from age 15-21.  In many respects, I grew up with you!  It has been over 40 years ago since I had last seen you, but I remember so fondly going  to the racetrack, the beach, Catalina Island, but most of all being welcomed to your home where Dennis barbecued for us.  I remember how proud he was at Jennifer’s Daughter of Job coronation and what a lovely story to hear at yesterday’s ceremony about  the gavel he made 
     They don’t make them like Dennis anymore!  Truly he had values from a kinder and gentler time.  I do remember that although he was never a person of many words or over sentimental, he once shared with Robert and me how lucky he was to find such a beautiful lady as Diane.
    Congratulations to all of you on your now much extended family!  Dennis must have been bursting with pride.
     With much love and appreciation for Dennis and all of you.

Cindy Sewell (Kawa)


OBITUARY

Dennis Stephen Abernathy

November 25, 1943 – August 22, 2019

Turner & Stevens Live Oak Mortuary & Memorial Park

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