I wanted to start this off by saying my grandpa boppa along with my dad, are the two people that made me the man I am today. As I was writing this I realized something, the small things you enjoy in your life are the things people remember you by (at least in my case). I will always have memories of Boppa sipping on his tea mixed with snapple which in most cases was 99% snapple and very little tea. I will remember going over to Boppa and Mia’s house staying up all hours of the night watching pink panther and national geographic. Boppa loved animal shows. Boppa also had a love for sweets, oreos being his all time favorite. Boppa also had a tradition where he would give us kids a dollar everytime we saw him. I remember as a kid the Boppa dollars made me feel so rich like I could buy anything in the world. Boppa always had something to show me in his garden and it’s little moments like that I’m grateful I didn’t take for granted. Boppa was the most kind person I have ever met and every day I strive to be just like him. Everytime we went to the grocery store or a restaurant Boppa absolutely had to talk to everyone, he was always someone that could cheer someone up and make people’s days just a little better. He was the best grandpa I could’ve ever asked for and I’m so grateful I had a man like him in my life to be such an amazing role model.

Dad Eulogy - Part 8

Finally, I wanted to end by recognizing my Family.  Beth, Will, and Hannah thank you for your support and your patience over the last 3 years.  I know it wasn’t easy to see the Grand Dad you love, go through what he went through.  You displayed courage and kindness.
Lexi you also helped me and my family a lot during this difficult time.  You made a difference in our lives.  Thank you.
Thank you Sis for all that you do.  Getting Mom and Dad through the disease and the healing you continue to bring after Dad passed.  Dad, Mom, and I need you and you have come through in Spades.  
Mom, I don’t even know where to start.  You are the model of a good wife and Mother.  Heck, more aptly a model for a good Saint.  Your dedication to Dad, Sis, and I for over 55 years is something that has earned you a huge amount of grace.  I know the past handful of years has ripped you up more than I can imagine.  Know that the life you…err…the life we had with “Wild Bill” was remarkable.  Keep sight that Dad is no longer in pain and torment.  He’s finally playing cards and dominoes, 24x7, and I think also keeping an eye out for all of us suckers still left..   

Thank you and God Bless.


Dad Eulogy - part 7

You can usually see them but you can’t pull them out.  I grab his tail.  I will not lose.  I’m pulling and pulling.  I will not lose.  It becomes evident that I’m not strong enough.  Dads yelling it’s time to go.  We are tied 5-5.  Hmmm…I wonder what would happen if I use a nearby stick to shock him into letting go.  I grab his tail and lift.  I will not lose.  I find a strategic location on the back-side of the Armadillo and insert the stick.  The armadillo in obvious alarm of being violated let’s go.  I win the bet!  
How many of those are mini-miracles?  At least a few I think.  Thank you Dad!  Thank you Sweet Mother Mary and thank you Good Lord Jesus.
BTW, if you have any wild or fond memories you’d like to share please post them on the Zoehller website to help commemorate him.  I think it’d be great to honor him and help others to remember.  Tyke did one on how Mom and Dad met at the bowling alley.  It once again seems to me a little more than coincidence, as it is a story Dad remembered and spoke of, up until his very darkest days.  Thank you Uncle Tyke, that meant a lot!
Also thank each of you for coming.  Your support for my Dad, family, and especially my Mom, means so very much. 


Dad Eulogy - Part 3
This wasn’t too long ago.  Maybe 3 years.  His Alzheimer’s had impacted him to the point where he could still function, but he would lose words often, could no longer keep score, and had developed a lot of paranoia and anger.
I kinda feel like I’m talking to myself as much as anyone because he won’t remember it anyway.  “Hannah now wants to spend more time w/ friends and boys then w/ me.  Will won’t talk to me no matter how hard I try.  Beth is spending too much money on things we don’t need and my job is at risk.”  “Dad, what did I do wrong?  Dad, what do I need to do to make things better?  How do I fix this?!?”.
Dad listened to me rant away….I conclude.  I’m spent.  I think it’s over.  He’s already forgotten what I’ve said anyway.  I’m gonna go make us some ice-cream… 
As I get up to go to the freezer, he croaks out “Billy, there is only one thing you really can do.”  “What Dad, what?”   Dad says:  “Just Love your kids and wife.”. 
At first I kinda just laugh and think to myself  “thanks for your help Dad…NOT!”.  We finished the game and our ice-cream, Mom gets back from errands, and I go home
Later that night in bed I started to think about it more.  Isn’t that exactly how he treated me?  This wasn’t just him talking.  This was his model of how to live.  I want to have an impact on my family.  How do I get there?  Dad did that by Loving me.  Dad did it by spending time w/ me.  Dad did it by showing me how to live.  Not telling me how to live.  Dad, in the midst of late-stage Alzheimers is still helping me.  Was that Dad or God?  Yah, another mini-miracle.
Ok, let’s talk a little bit about Dad’s life.  Here’s a bullet list of items I’ll never forget and just want to share them with you to give you a feel for how amazing, crazy, and rich his life was.  BTW I started with over 20 and narrowed it down to top 10 for brevity’s sake.  So starting from the top of the top 10 fond memories or reasons Dad was called “Wild Bill”,  David Letterman style. 

Eulogy part 2.
Dad used to go to Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament weekly.   Like midnight-1 am or some crazy time like that..  I’m going through my mini confession on how I need to be better and he listens.  Eventually when I’m done he says “Billy last night during Adoration I was reading this book.  One of the things in it will interest you.  The author, who I think was a saint, said “God will judge you as you perceive him”.  I say, “Huh”?  Dad goes on, “God will judge you as you perceive him.  Do you perceive him as mean and judgmental or do you perceive him as kind and forgiving?  How you think of God, and how you act to others, is how you will be judged.”.
Think about that for a minute.
Do you try to be forgiving and kind and generous in your life?  I do.  Do we fall short?  Certainly.  But God who is much better than us, has got to be nicer and more generous than we are.  He surely is infinitely more forgiving and compassionate than me…  If I am these things even a little, he is these things a lot!
And Dad’s words really impacted how I think of myself, my life, and my God.  I went from thinking “Billy, you aren’t good enough.”.  To “Billy, just keep trying and learn to do better next time”.  Dad who just happened to come across this guidance in the wee morning of my melt-down basically flipped me on my head.  I went from negative; to positive.  I went from beating myself up and worrying about things I can’t change; to learning and actively considering how to do better in the future.  In my opinion the timing and impact of this was a mini-miracle.
The 2nd message isn’t as deep really, but just as impactful.  Similar situation, similar results, similar mini-miracle due to impact and the fact it happened so late in his battle w/ Alzheimers.
When Dad was still at home I would come over every week to give Mom a break.  So Dad and I are playing cards at his house and I’m talking about my family.  I’m not complaining per se, but I’m definitely struggling.

Dad Eulogy
I wanted to spend a little bit of time talking about Dad.   It should last about 15-20 minutes.  I’m hoping by reading this instead of looking at you it will reduce the amount of tears, so please bear with me.  There are 2 things in particular that Dad gave me that I reflect on often.  One is a bit religious, the other is about family.  I’d like to share them with you.  I’d also like to have a little bit of fun and celebrate his life by telling a few fond quick stories.  They don’t call him “Wild Bill'' for nothing.
So Dad’s “Words of Wisdom”.  Dad couldn’t get through college but he was brilliant in so many ways.  He was an absolute Wizard at Math.  Dad could make friends with almost anyone anywhere anytime…unless they were a bit uptight then sometimes it didn’t go so well.  You had to be able to laugh at yourself a bit to really get him.  Even more importantly to me was how he viewed life.  Particularly religion and family.  Two things in particular my father taught me that really changed how I thought and approached life.  I think he would be pleased if they could also somehow impact you a little.
First message:  I’m not a bad person, but I certainly can do better.  I also have my fair share of regrets.  I don’t remember the exact circumstances, but about 15 years ago I was confiding some of this to my Dad.  “What if I’m not good enough?  What if something I did offended God too much?  “I wish I could just be as good as you are Dad”.  He said “you are already better than I’ll ever be.”.  Which was as nice to hear…as it was untrue. 

Bill was one of the first residents that I had cared for. He was so sweet and loving and told very funny jokes.  Always telling us good morning and goodnight or the I love yous and thank yous. From playing dominoes and puzzles to just sitting outside enjoying the rain or eating ice cream and enjoying the sun.  I’m going to miss him dearly as much as I miss the rest of the residents that I have lost. My condolences to the Grohman family and much love to y’all as well! It was a pleasure and honor to care for Mr. William Grohman. 

Tyke

I am Bill' brother in-law who never met Bill until later after the marriage. I was overseas in the service. Charmaine was just fresh out of the convent and hardly ever dated. She was invited to join a team bowling event one night and accepted. They were short one guy. They recruited some guy(Bill) they found playing pin ball. Bill and
Charmaine hit it right off and started dating. In a matter of weeks they were in love and in months they were engaged and married. They raise two wonderful kids and were happily married for 55 years. Nothing for me to worry about. Bill turned out to be a really great guy. A real fairy tale.
Clayton-Tyke Smith

Sodalis was where I first met Bill and Charmaine.  That was were God puts use on the same path. We were going to comfort each other during  the very hard path we’re about to take . Bill loved eating cookies he always said please and thank you. Bill had become part of our family plus Charmaine.  Heaven gained another Angel  alone with Glen and Gentry. 
Peace be with you and your family. 

Bill and Art were such fun loving friends. They were always pulling pranks but they probably learned that at  St Gerard. 
The 4 of us had many fun times together.    I will never forget when Art was dying Bill would come over every few  days and take him out for a drive. We will miss him greatly.      Love Barbara Govett

I remember Bill when I was younger. He was always so funny. Rest In peace my friend. God wrap your arms around this family and give them strength. Love you Rita Cloud

OBITUARY

William James Grohman Sr

July 3, 1942 – August 14, 2022

Zoeller Funeral Home

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