Patsy Marie Myers Cole

Patsy Marie Cole was a woman for whom actions would speak louder than words. Her life motto might well have been “if it isn’t logical, it’s not important.” The qualities of being fair, just and the ability to recognize what was right were clearly driving forces in Patsy’s life. She was also the kind of person who could respect a “do not disturb” sign, whether it was real or implied. She was analytical and observant, with an ability to be simultaneously spontaneous and keenly perceptive. Patsy was modest in her actions and extremely literal in her thoughts and in the manner in which she communicated with others. When Patsy said something, she meant it. All those who knew her appreciated this trademark quality.

      Patsy was born on March 27, 1960 at Oshawa General Hospital in Oshawa, Ontario. Her parents were Harold and Laurraine Myers. Patsy was raised in Whitby, Ontario. Even as a small child, Patsy wanted to understand what was right and what was wrong in any given situation. As Patsy grew older, she realized the importance of being treated fairly, and in return, she treated everyone around her the same way. This belief in fair play served Patsy well throughout her life and despite her natural shyness; she enjoyed a solid group of friends.

      Since Patsy sought to treat those around her with respect, she often found herself in the role of playing peacemaker within her family. She was comfortable in working through the types of sibling rivalry situations that quite often occur, because she loved the challenge of conflict resolution. She would look at the most reasonable and practical ways to settle any disputes. Patsy was raised with one sibling. She had an older brother, Allen. Patsy was constantly involved in activities with her sibling. Patsy and her sibling had the typical rivalries while growing up, but they shared many life experiences.

      During her childhood, family and friends viewed Patsy as a quiet and reserved person with what most would consider a calm and tranquil demeanor. In fact, she was a fairly curious child who had the ability to entertain herself and didn’t require much in the way of outside stimulation. A great deal of Patsy’s free time was spent learning how and why the things around her worked. She was an active child who loved being outdoors and absorbing all the sensory input that nature could provide. She took part in figure skating and bowling. In her spare time she liked scary movies, John Wayne movies, playing cards and board games. Patsy's memorable achievements included wining bowling awards and bowling with the "Youth Travelling Bowling Team" (YBC).

      The fact that she was curious was an asset to Patsy while she was in school. She possessed strong study skills and good concentration. She relished the task of scrutinizing problems, investigating all of the options and then solving them. Patsy enjoyed tackling the project that was right in front of her and working it straight through to its conclusion. Sometimes, she would become so involved in the process of problem solving that she would lose awareness of her surroundings. Experience was Patsy’s best teacher. She graduated from Henry Street High School in 1978. She enjoyed some courses more than others, having favourite classes and teachers.

      Those who didn’t know Patsy well might have thought her to be objective and somewhat emotionally detached, but family and friends who were close to her knew that she was capable of unexpected flashes of humour. Patsy’s good friends tended to be “thinkers” like herself. Even though the circle of friends was somewhat small, it was a strong and loyal group, and Patsy liked nothing better than to spend her free time with them. Patsy was well known for always being up front and open, never hiding her true feelings, qualities that drew deep loyalty from her friends because they understood and appreciated her for the person she was. Another quality that people admired in Patsy was her ability to link cause and effect and apply the appropriate connection in her assessment of any new situation. While growing up, some of her best friends were Robin and Laurie. Later in life, she became friends with Val, Dawn, Bonnie, Annie, Gerry among others.

      This same loyalty and up front honesty Patsy shared with her friends carried over to other aspects of her life, including her relationships with her family. On May 2nd, 1987, Patsy exchanged wedding vows with Daniel Cole at the Holy Family Church of Whitby, Ontario. The marriage became a solid relationship, due in part to Patsy’s skill at bringing fresh energy and clarity to meeting Daniel's needs. She was a great listener who enjoyed the couple’s “together” time, especially when it came to celebrating special occasions.

      As the family grew, Patsy was easily able to adapt to the changes and challenges of parenthood. Patsy was blessed with one child, a daughter, Jillian. Patsy was never impulsive in dealing with family problems. Instead, she would carefully think things through before implementing the solution in a logical and objective manner. Patsy was a strong, clear communicator who excelled at eliminating confusion by making matters crystal clear to all those involved. At the same time, Patsy’s inventive nature could turn some of the boring old household chores into a fun activity for the family.

      In her work life, Patsy was the kind of person who had no difficulty in taking on a project and seeing it through to its completion. She excelled at dealing with those pesky details that can derail some people, and once she understood exactly why she was working on a project, she could plow full steam ahead. For Patsy, being able to grasp the logical components of any task was significant to her in appreciating its importance. Even if she worked alone on an assignment, Patsy was able to incorporate and welcome new insights from co-workers, and she would readily use them if they improved the process. Her primary occupation was a Retail Associate. She was employed at Wal Mart for 37 years. Patsy always made the effort to be a team player, doing what was necessary in order to get the job done.

      Patsy’s curious and inquisitive nature influenced her choice of leisure pursuits as well. She applied her strong concentration and analytical skills as to how things worked to her choice of activities. She particularly enjoyed the “alone” time her hobbies provided. Her favourite pursuits were gardening, playing cards, watching hockey and Nascar. Patsy was content to enjoy her hobbies alone but was also willing to share her interests with others.

      Patsy had the ability to stay calm and the determination to do what was necessary to get the job finished, traits that helped her enjoy sports. Recreational sports included bowling. Patsy was also something of a sports fan and enjoyed following her favourite events whenever she got the opportunity. Tops on her list were hockey, Nascar, baseball and show jumping.

      Patsy appreciated the occasions when she was able to travel and get away on a vacation. She enjoyed learning about different locales and was open to exploring new and different places. Favourite vacations included Daytona Beach, Florida. She thoroughly enjoyed the task of gathering and analyzing travel information as she prepared for an upcoming trip.

      Patsy was a lover of animals and cherished her pets. Patsy loved all of her pets equally. They were best friends for all her life. Her family was rounded out by her dogs Logan, Atticus, Tucker and her daughter's horse Chant.

In April of 2013, Patsy's very dear friend, Val, donated her kidney to Patsy. Patsy knew most of her life she would need this kidney transplant and 30 years ago, Val had offered her kidney to her. Patsy and her family were and forever will be very grateful for Val's powerful act of kindness, love and friendship.

Patsy passed away on December 4, 2014 at Oshawa General Hospital. She fought a brave battle against cancer. She is survived by her daughter Jillian, husband Dan, Mother Laurraine, Brother, Allen, Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, Nieces and Nephews. Services were held at Oshawa Funeral Home. Patsy was laid to rest in Resurrection Catholic Cemetery in Whitby, Ontario.

      Patsy strongly believed that talk is cheap. She was the type of person who would show others her feelings through her actions. She was practical and realistic but was able to be flexible when the need arose. She had a curiosity about the things around her and tried to experience life directly rather than sit back and talk about it. The experiences she treasured most were those she shared with her loved ones. Patsy Marie Cole will be greatly missed.

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COLE, Patsy Marie (Nee: Myers)

Peacefully at Lakeridge Health Oshawa on Thursday, December 4th, 2014 at the age of 54. Beloved wife of Dan for 27 years. Loving mother of Jillian (Brenden). Cherished daughter of Laurraine and the late Harold. Dear sister of Allen (Cathy). Sister-in-law of Ken (Mary-lynn), Bob (Alison), and the late Bill. Predeceased by her mother and father-in-law Jim and Edith Cole. Patsy will be lovingly remembered by several nieces, nephews, aunts, uncles, cousins and friends. The family would like to thank a very special friend Val for giving Patsy the gift of life. Visitation will be held at the OSHAWA FUNERAL HOME, 847 King Street West, (905-721-1234) on Tuesday, December 9th from 2 – 4 and 6 – 8 p.m. Memorial Service will be held in the Chapel on Wednesday, December 10th at 11:00 a.m. Followed by a reception. Memorial donations can be made to the Kidney Foundation, Canadian Cancer Society and Durham Humane Society.