Jeannine Marie Madeleine Chamberland MacDonald

In the fall of 2006, Mom handed me a black and white "Composition" notebook and said to me, "This is for you". In it, Mom had carefully recorded the important dates and events of her life up to the present. All of the entries were written in pencil, in her beautiful penmanship. A note on the first page, in the top right-hand corner read, "Copied from 23 October 2000 and updated"; the notebook itself was dated 19 October 2006.

After Mom's death on December 24, 2014 I came across three other notebooks among her belongings (all written in longhand and in pencil): the first was the original journal from which Mom had copied and updated her notes dated 23 October 2000; another one was dated 18 March 2005; and a third one was dated 13 February 2007. On the first page of the last journal Mom wrote, "This is especially for Jacqueline. I may add to it. I will try to bring up-to-date all important dates of my life and a few details."

In putting together Mom's memoir, I compiled the entries of all four journals to give a more complete picture of Mom's personal experiences and reflections. I also kept the text in its original journal format to preserve Mom's personal voice.

Mom's journey beyond 2007 up until her death on Christmas Eve in 2014 is not recorded in her journals except for a few entries between 2008 and 2012 when Mom came across her journals and jotted down a few additional comments on her current life. By this time, Mom's ability to recall recent events was slipping, which limited her ability to write and record her activities. As the co-writer of Mom's story, I have done my best to summarize her life's journey from where she left off in her journals, a journey which I had the privilege of sharing most intimately in these last few years.

And so begins the story of a loving, courageous and grace-filled French-Canadian woman... my mother, Jeannine Marie Madeleine (Chamberland) MacDonald...

I was born 2 March 1923. My family was then living on rue Lepailleur in Pointe-aux-Trembles (Québec), the very east side of Montréal Island, now part of the city, I believe.

September 1923 - At six months, I was struck with meningitis. At the time, the doctor did not have any cure for it and I was not expected to live. Mother (Magda Chamberland, née Magnan) put me in the hands of the Virgin Mary and promised her that I would wear only white and blue until my First Communion, and of course black, when necessary in school. A miracle must have happened as I recovered completely to the surprise of the doctor. Mother believed it was a miracle. She kept her promise, need I say.

May 1924 - May 1928 - We moved to Montréal at 3899 rue Lajeunesse on the north side of the city. We lived there for four years.

May 1928 - December 1929 - We moved to 7451 avenue Casgrain in the north part of Montréal.

September 1929 - I started school at Ste-Cécile.

December 1929 - As we were warned that our house on Casgrain was being demolished, we moved in a hurry to a basement apartment at 7375A rue De La Roche, awaiting the next door flat to be free.

April 22, 1930 - I made my First Communion. I attended a new school, Notre Dame du Rosaire.

1 May 1930 - We moved to 7379 rue De La Roche on the third floor, the building next door to our previous basement apartment. It was a lovely bright and large flat (Mom told me that she really enjoyed this apartment). I continued my school year in the local school, Notre Dame du Rosaire. We lived there to the end of April 1931.

May 1931 - We moved to 5158 rue Garnier, further south in the parish of St-Stanislas and only two streets from "grand-mère" Magnan, my mother's mother. This house was my grandparents' home when Mom was a young girl: Odilon & Zénoïde Magnan (née Trépanier). This, too, was temporary. The house being old and needing a lot of work done to it, we moved two doors south to 5150 Garnier.

In 1932 - We moved two doors away, to the south, to 5150 rue Garnier. This house too had once belonged to my mother's father, then owned by her sisters, who then occupied a smaller apartment above. Father (Joseph Raoul Auréal Chamberland), lived there until his death on 10 October 1961 at the age of 79. Mother lived at this address until late 1962 or early 1963 when she moved in with Raymond and Marguerite (Guite), my brother and his wife, at 5278 rue Marquette. Mother left this home (in 1966) to live in a home for the aged in the centre of Montréal where she could get medical care, which by then was needed. She was there only a few weeks; she died in her sleep on 4 August 1966 at the age of 80.

I lived with my parents at 5150 Garnier St. until December 1952. While living there, I met our neighbours, Mr. and Mrs. Leo and Carmen Browne next door. I babysat for them. In 1940 Mrs. Browne's aunt, Mrs. Martineau, was manager of an office of Tétrault Shoe factory. Mrs. Martineau offered me to work for them at the "big" salary of $8.00 a week!

1 November 1940 - I started work at Tétrault Shoe Co., which was located in the far east end of Montréal. I was 17 years old.

Early June 1946 - After 5 1/2 years at the Tétrault Shoe Co., I was offered a much higher salary to work somewhere else. I took the job, but they were dishonest and only needed someone for an annual bulk mailing. Once the mailing was done, I was out of a job and too proud to even think of asking my previous employers to hire me back.

Later June 1946 - Through a good friend, I applied at the Bell Telephone Co. and started right away in the Accounting Department and was fortunate to move on to different departments with promotions until the 30 April 1959.

In the meantime, Mother had severe arthritis and needed constant help in the house. So my sister Denise, who was with child, her husband Phil (Robichaud) and their baby Manon, moved in; they needed help of another kind. With all that, there was no space for me.

2 December 1952 - After looking around, I luckily found a lovely elderly lady who needed company. I moved to 4636 Marcil Avenue, N.D.G. (Notre Dame de Grace), the west part of Montréal, and lived with Mrs. Mabel Harcourt. She was a darling lady. Unfortunately, Mrs. Harcourt died in November 1953. I stayed there a short while after until her son Charles married Margaret Burke who had been his love for many years. Margaret had been caring for an old aunt and uncle, and Charlie had been caring for his mother and a brother, while they awaited marriage.

1 March 1954 - In the meantime, I had met Arlen Bellamy (later Kerr). Arlen had moved to Canada from England. We met through a mutual friend and became very good friends. We moved to Shuter Street just north of Sherbrooke Street in downtown Montréal, a 10-15 minute walk from my office at the Bell Telephone Co. on Guy Street. We liked our flat, but the landlady was horrid. She would come into our apartment while we were at work and would nose around. And we could not have any friends over as she would knock at our door to complain. So, we moved again.

1 May 1955 - Arlen and I moved to 4530 rue Girouard, Apt. #14. By now, Arlen was doing well, having a good job and wanted to be on her own. So, she moved out after a little while, but we kept in touch from then on.

Then, Joan Smith (from Toronto) moved in for a while, awaiting a place nearer her work. When she left, I was quite happy to live on my own. I lived there until 1 May 1959.

1955 - I went on vacation to Bermuda with my friend of a few years, Margaret Pollock, whom I met through the Bell Telephone Co. and who lived only two streets away from me. We spent two weeks there and enjoyed it very much.

9-20 April 1956 & Christmas 1956 - I travelled to Mexico twice in 1956. My cousin, Jean-Marie Déry, worked for the Canadian Embassy in Mexico as Ambassador to Canada. He was an excellent tour guide and his passion for Mexico was contagious. I fell in love with the Mexican culture and its people, who were very friendly and welcoming to Canadians. It was at this time that I learned to speak Spanish, which I picked up very easily and became quite fluent.

Spring 1957 - I returned to Mexico. This was my last trip there.

17 March 1958 - I went on vacation to Bermuda with Margaret Pollock again. We stayed at "Inland", a guest house in the city of Hamilton in Pembroke Parish, where we vacationed before. "Inland" was the home of Bill and Betty Townsend. When we arrived, Betty apologized that we couldn't have the same room that we had had on the previous visit, as they had a guest for the winter. On the second day of our vacation (18 March 1958), we were introduced to their winter guest - Robert MacDonald. It was the "coup de foudre" for both of us! Bob was a chef at the Bermudiana Hotel. After being there a short time, meeting Bob daily, he asked me if I would go out with him (to see a show or whatever). I said I would like to, but could he find a companion for Margaret. So we went out fairly frequently all four of us. I enjoyed the outings as a foursome. However, toward the end of our vacation, Robert asked me if we could have a quiet walk on the beach, only the two of us, before we left. So, the next day, being the day of our return home, we had a walk on the beach and he asked me if we could keep in touch from now on. I was very pleased and agreed to it. It was there and then that we knew where we were heading. We exchanged addresses and promises to keep in constant touch. Bob was returning to Brockville in late April and would like to see me sometime in Montréal. Bill and Betty Townsend were pleased to hear of our friendship. They told me that Bob was a real gentleman and hoped our friendship would continue. Then, I went home with Margaret and told her the news. I was pleased, but not sure if it would happen. I left Bermuda the 6 April 1958, but my heart stayed there.

21 April 1958 - Bob returned to Canada (Brockville) shortly after Margaret and me. His first visit to Montréal was on the 21 April 1958. I met him at the train station. We had a cup of tea and a light meal at the restaurant. Then, he insisted on going to one of the large shops, in the jewellery department, and I was unable to believe it. He asked me to wait a moment, and came to get me to offer me a diamond ring and asked me to marry him at a quiet moment in the restaurant. I was speechless, need I say. We went to my parents for supper and surprised everyone. I was not yet recovered from the shock. I saw him off at the train; he had to leave for Brockville in the early evening as he worked the next day. I went home still in shock. We wrote to each other every day from then on and had the odd phone call, also. Bob could not visit in Montréal every week. A few times, I was invited to the "Grahams" (Sam and Margaret) where he lived in Brockville (30 Centre Street). They had a spare room for me. My visits there were pleasant. I enjoyed them. Bob could not be with me a full weekend (because of his work at the Brockville Country Club), but between hours that were free, we would go for walks. It was nice in the country.

We decided that the above courtship was enough and planned to be married. The best time for Bob was in October.

11 October 1958 - We were married in the Cathedral-Basilica of Mary, Queen of the World (Marie-Reine-du-Monde) in Montréal, in the small wedding chapel. Bob being an Anglican, we had to be granted special permission to be married in the Catholic Church. Monsignor Robert Mitchell performed the ceremony. We honeymooned at "Yoo-Hoo" in Bermuda, of course, guests of Bill and Kathy Waldron, who were friends of Bob. We spent two weeks there.

Upon our return, Bob was able to find a temporary post in Montréal until the end of April, as I was not able to break my lease. We lived at 4530 rue Girouard, Apt. #14 until the end of April 1959. The lawyer who owned the property was Mr. Bobrove. He did not like me because at the time I was in charge of his telephone account at the Bell, and every month I had to call him and be firm by threatening to disconnect his phone to get his payment in, which was always paid late. So he took this as an excuse to hold me to my lease to the last day. What a relief when the lease was up!

1 May 1959 - We moved to Brockville and lived in a small cottage at 3 Bayview Road near the St. Lawrence River. We were also near our friends, Mr. and Mrs. Sam Graham, who lived at 30 Centre Street, just a 5-minute walk away. I loved it there, but the cottage was not winterized. We stayed there until 1 December 1959. The cottage was lovely during the warmer seasons, but by December it was not very comfortable.

1 December 1959 - We left for Bermuda for a two week vacation.

15 December 1959 - We went to work at the Trellis Bay Club for the winter on the tiny island of Bellamy Cay, situated just off Beef Island in the Caribbean. Bob and I were in charge of a hotel "at sea", you might say. Beef Island was built in the shape of a horseshoe and Bellamy Cay was situated in the centre of the Bay. There were six double rooms at the Club house all equipped for summer use with showers and all the amenities of a good hotel room. The dining-room was in the centre of the Club, with an open view of the Bay. There were also four beach cottages across the Bay from us, on Beef Island.

Bob was chef, among other things, and I was the "business" girl (sometimes the manager), acting as accountant and receptionist. We worked there until the 1 April 1960. The place was beautiful and we both loved it, but the work involved long hours and we were both exhausted; in fact, we were responsible for running the resort 24-hours daily. Receiving new guests on our small island and with all the care they needed, was an exhausting task. The yachts would arrive at any time of the day or night. It was not rare to get up at 4:00 a.m. in the morning, or earlier, (having gone to bed at 11:00 p.m. or later) to add up long bar bills (without the help of an adding machine) to receive payment from the captain of the guest ship before leaving for other destinations. It was a good thing I was not bad in arithmetic! At night, the band (often a steel band) would play till very late to please the guests who were dancing. Our room was only 10 or 12 feet from the dining room/dance hall. Sleeping was not easy, need I say.

On some rare occasions, I would travel with Bob by Ferry to do business in Road Town, which was located on Tortola Island (just a few miles from Beef Island). I liked these trips. We got to meet the owners of "Fort Burt", Chris and Millie Hammersley, who ran a similar business, but more like a hotel in town; no middle-of-the-night guests arriving, etc., etc. On one of these occasions, we found out that Chris wanted to go to Europe with his wife, Millie, for two or three months for an extended vacation. As we had promised to work at Trellis Bay until 1 April 1960, we agreed to take over the management of Fort Burt during the summer months when they would be away, and we looked forward to it.

1 April 1960 - We left Bellamy Cay to move to Fort Burt in Road Town, on Tortola Island, the main island in the British Virgin Islands. As Fort Burt was a larger hotel-style resort, we planned to train with the Hammersleys for the whole month of April. However, Millie took ill, and they had to cancel their plans. So, it turned out to be a month of easier duties and a change of pace for us. We left Fort Burt at the end of April 1960 to return home to Canada.

May 1960 - On the way home, we stopped in Bermuda for a week and stayed at Kerri House, now "Royal Palms" in Hamilton, for a complete rest; then home to Brockville via Montréal for a week. We stayed with Charlie Harcourt at 4636 Marcil Avenue (N.D.G., Montréal), which turned out to be very fruitful!

15 May 1960 - We moved to Brockville; Bob was expected to work there for the summer at the Brockville Country Club. We lived in a small cottage right by the St. Lawrence River at Heather's Point. This time, we overlooked the River from the second floor of a two-story building; the ground floor served as a garage. The owner had a larger cottage on the same parcel of land.

October 1960 - The cottage was lovely for summer use, but it was not winterized. I seem to remember it had a wood stove, but I don't remember any other heating system. Sometime in October, the landlord, Perry Conklin, offered us a room in his house just for the winter, as Bob was to return to Bermuda for another season as chef at the Bermudiana Hotel in the spring. The house was in Brockville on King Street. It was a really nice big house with plenty of room, but it was not a home as the owner turned out to be a real bully! By then, I was five months pregnant and showing, and the owner did not want to see me around. He expected me to be the "maid", you might say. Over and above our rent, we paid two thirds of the cost of all the food purchased and I cooked all the meals. I also had to do all the washing and ironing. I was not allowed to sit in the TV room to knit (the only time I had to relax after the dinner dishes), or watch a program with Bob (I was knitting a sweater for Ian for Christmas and some little things for the baby). I had to hide in our room, more or less. Need I say, I was miserable for weeks!

30 December 1960 - By now, I was near my eighth month and I was beside myself. Bob called me from the Brockville General Hospital (where he worked during the winter months) to ask how I was doing and I burst into tears, unable to talk. He immediately told me to leave the house empty-handed and go to Grandma and Grandpa Grahams' (at 30 Centre Street). He would settle with Perry later. I took a cab in tears and was received with open arms at the Grahams'. Poor Bob, he had to face the bully to retrieve what little baggage we had. We stayed with the Grahams until Jackie came along.

9 February 1961 - A very special day - In the early hours of the night, I had the first signs that things were happening. I called the doctor in the morning. He was angry at me for not calling him earlier. My darling Jacqueline Marie was born at 7:30 p.m., all of 5lbs 15 ounces, small but healthy. I guess I was not quite fit because Bob made all the arrangements for her Christening himself, a few days later. We returned home from the hospital on the 18 February (at the Grahams'). Jacqueline was christened the very next day (February 19th) at St. Francis Xavier parish in Brockville.

25-28 February 1961 - Bob left for Bermuda at the end of February. He stayed with Charles Harcourt overnight at 4636 Marcil Avenue then headed to Toronto (256 Elm St.) to visit Ian, Bob's son, before leaving for Bermuda. Bob arrived in Bermuda on the 28th. Plans were that as soon as Jacqueline would be able to fly, we were to join him. Bob was offered permanent employment at the Bermudiana as a chef. Jacqueline and I lived with the Grahams until we joined Bob in Bermuda.

25 March 1961 - Jacqueline and I left for Montréal prior to going to Bermuda to join Bob. We spent a few days at Charlie's. While we were there, Jacqueline and I went to see Mom and Dad and family. Poor Daddy, being deaf, he did not understand that we were leaving for an indefinite period. He thought we were leaving for a vacation only. As I was leaving with baby Jacqueline, he asked me when we were coming back. It broke my heart. The cab was at the door and I had to tell him. He waved goodbye from the porch as tears rolled down his cheeks. It was the first and last time I saw my dad cry. I never saw him again.

5 April 1961 - Jacqueline and I left for Bermuda. Charlie Harcourt insisted on coming with us to help with the journey. It was reassuring to have him travel with us, and I am sure Bob felt better for it. (I would not be surprised if he made the arrangements with Charles on that night he stayed with him before leaving for Bermuda.) Charlie stayed with us in Bermuda for two weeks. He left on April 20th.

I must say, the morning that we were leaving for Bermuda, I had such a laugh. Jacqueline had discovered her fingers, and the faces she made looking at them had me in stitches. Vera Burke (Charlie's sister-in-law who was there for a few days to help with all the preparations) had to break up the party. We had to catch the plane. We arrived safe and sound in Bermuda with Bob to greet us.

5 April - 13 May 1961 - Bob, Jacqueline and I took possession (on rental only) of "Tee Cottage" in Warwick, for a few weeks while the owners were house-sitting a bigger home.

13 May 1961 - We moved to "Wycliffe" on Pitts Bay Road, Pembroke, near St. John's Road, a short ride to Bob's work (he had a mobilette). We lived there until 2 September 1962, ever so happy.

26 June 1961 - I started work at the Bermuda Telephone Company. Mr. Desmond Walker was my boss. Bob and I became good friends with him and his wife, Jean, and we kept in touch with each other until his death in 1997. (I lost touch with Jean shortly after that.) I worked for Bermuda "Tel" until the end of August 1962 as Bob and I were returning to Canada in September.

10 October 1961 - Daddy died suddenly in Montréal at the age of 79. I went to Montréal for a few days to attend the funeral alone. In the meantime, Jacqueline was looked after by a nurse friend, Yvonne Caldwell, for the days I was away. The couple loved her so much that they were in tears when I went to take her home.

We loved living in Bermuda Bob and I, however, things were not good in Montréal. Dad had died, Mother's health got worse, and my sister Denise had to have eye surgery, etc., etc. Also, Jacqueline was allergic to many things: wheat, citrus and cow's milk for a start. Also, we don't know how she broke out all over with sores, caused possibly by some insects. She had gastroenteritis and was in great danger for a few days, etc., etc. I was concerned about all these things and Bob worried about both of us. In the meantime, Bob received a call from Canada Catering in Montréal, offering him a manager's position in the cafeteria of Avon Cosmetics in Pointe-Claire, Québec, which he accepted. Bob said that too many things had happened (as mentioned above) and after months of care, the doctor advised us to leave Bermuda; Jacqueline should not take the winter there, the damp climate was too hard on her. (I never questioned it, but just now (in 2007) I wonder - Bob was worried about Jacqueline and me - he may have called the company for an opening around Montréal, for a change of climate. Knowing Bob, he might well have done that for the sake of his family, in spite of his love for Bermuda. He made the move for the two of us. Bless his good heart.)

2 September 1962 - We left Bermuda. We were very sad to leave, but it was a wise move. Again, we went to Charlie's where we stayed for one month at 5015 Clanranald, Apt. #16, NDG, his new home, while looking for a permanent place to live.

1 October 1962 - We found an apartment in Pointe-Claire, Québec at 500 Delmar Street, Apt. #5, second floor, two bedrooms, and just a few minutes' walk from Avon.

1 March 1964 - 11 November 1965 - I worked for D. S. Scott Transport Ltd.

12 November 1965 - 5 May 1967 - I worked for Delorimier Distributors Inc. in Pointe-Claire as Assistant and Secretary to the Credit Manager, then acting Credit Manager for 1 year.

4 August 1966 - Mom died in her sleep after years of torture with arthritis. I learned of the news at work. She was 80 years old.

1 October 1966 - We moved to the next building at 502 Delmar St., Apt. #14 on the 3rd floor, a 3-bedroom apartment, to allow space for Ian who came to live with us for an indefinite time.

8 May 1967 - 25 November 1967 - I worked for Terry Industries in Pointe-Claire as Secretary to the Credit Manager. This post I left when we moved to Cornwall, Ontario.

1 December 1967 - As Bob was offered work at the Cornwall General Hospital as Food Service Manager in charge of the Dietary Department, we moved to a duplex apartment (second floor) at 611 St. Felix Street in Cornwall, Ontario K6H 5B4 (Tel. 613-933-4669).

Summer 1968 - Ian, having moved with us from Pointe-Claire, could not find employment in Cornwall. He left for Montréal during the summer.

2 December 1968 - I started work at Fennell, Rudden, Campbell & Wilson, Barristers & Solicitors as Receptionist and Title Searcher. I retired from there on 9 September 1986.

11 October 1969 - Ian married Janet Taylor at St. Monica's Church in Montréal, Québec. The Reverend Joseph Sullivan officiated. They were both 21 years of age. Coincidentally, their anniversary is the same date as Bob's and mine, just 11 years later.

20 April 1971 - Bob underwent lung surgery to remove the lower lobe of his right lung which had a malignant growth (squamous cell carcinoma) at the Kingston General Hospital (Kingston, Ontario). Bob, a two-pack-a-day smoker, quit "cold turkey" from that day on.

6 July 1971 - Carolyn Anne MacDonald was born in St-Laurent, Québec. This was Ian and Janet's first child; our first grandchild.

August 1971 - Bob, Jacqueline and I travelled to Virginia Beach along with my brother Réal and his wife Madeleine (Mado). We stayed at "Johnson's Apartments", 317-30th Street in Virginia Beach owned by Mrs. Leona Johnson. Our spacious, 3-bedroom apartment was on the second floor, and was fully equipped with fridge, stove and air conditioning - very comfortable. It was just a five-minute walk from the beach.

5-26 May, 1972 - Bob, Jackie and I went to England for three weeks. It had been many years since Bob had seen his step-brother and step-sister, John and Joan (Sperr) who lived in London and his uncle Dave and auntie Lily (Nicoll) who lived in Brighton. It was Jacqueline's and my first time in England. We all had a wonderful vacation.

3 December 1974 - Arlene Anne MacDonald was born in Montréal, Québec. This was Ian and Janet's second child and our second grandchild.

1973 - 1979 - We enjoyed many summer vacations in the States. We alternated between Ogunquit, Maine and Virginia Beach, Virginia. I preferred Ogunquit for its beautiful rugged coastline and long scenic walks along the Marginal Way (which stretched from Ogunquit Beach to Perkins Cove), and Bob preferred the warm waters of Virginia Beach for swimming and relaxing in the warm sun.

30 November 1978 - mid-May 1979 - Bob's bowel ruptured from diverticulitis and he was rushed to the hospital with peritonitis infection. To save his life, Bob received emergency bowel surgery and was given a temporary colostomy. In the following months, Bob underwent two more bowel surgeries to repair his bowel and to remove the colostomy.

Summer of 1980 - Bob was diagnosed with a brain tumour to the cerebellum. The tumour was removed on 15 August 1980 at the Ottawa Civic Hospital (Ottawa, Ontario). It was a malignant secondary growth originating from his lung. Dr. Brien Benoit performed the surgery.

Early September 1980 - Jacqueline left Cornwall for Trent University in Peterborough, Ontario, which she attended for three years.

29 September 1980 - We moved to our own home at 604 Fifth St. East, Cornwall, Ontario K6H 2M7 (Tel. 613-933-4669).

8-27 August 1981 – I travelled to Virginia Beach with Bob and my older sister, Yvette Lafèrrière, who was suffering from the early stages of Alzheimer's disease. We had a hurricane in the last week; first week was very hot. Our dear friend Mrs. Johnson was getting old.

9 August 1982 - Bob's second brain surgery performed by Dr. Russell (Ottawa Civic Hospital).

30 August 1982 - Bob began radiation therapy at Melrose Lodge in Ottawa. His last treatment was on 13 September 1982.

16-29 October 1982 - Left for Virginia Beach with Bob for a two week vacation. The first day into our trip (October 17th), a south-eastern storm stirred up and followed us all the way to Virginia Beach, lasting until the 25th. By then, the rain and winds had stopped, but the temperatures remained cool. We left for home on the 28th and the weather warmed up as we headed north - all in reverse! This was our last vacation together.

2 April 1983 (8:00 p.m.) - Bob received a conditional Baptism and First Holy Communion at St. Peter's Church in Cornwall, Ontario. Father Kelvin E. Maloney performed the ceremony at the Easter Vigil Mass.

10 April 1983 (12:30 p.m.) - Bob was confirmed in the Catholic Faith at St. Peter's Church in Cornwall by Bishop Eugene LaRocque. Fr. Kelvin E. Maloney had been Bob's spiritual advisor. I was so proud of Bob.

13 April 1983 - Bob had his third and final surgery to the cerebellum at the Ottawa Civic Hospital. Dr. Benoit performed the surgery which proved to be very difficult due to the build-up of scar tissue.

21 April 1983 - A shunt was put in to relieve the pressure in Bob's head.

29 April 1983 - Bob was transferred from the Civic Hospital in Ottawa to the Cornwall General Hospital.

3 June 1983 - Jacqueline graduated from Trent University with a B.A. in French and Psychology. Bob was still in hospital and too weak to attend the graduation ceremony in Peterborough. He was very disappointed to not be able to attend Jacqueline's big day.

6 June 1983 - Bob was discharged from the Cornwall General Hospital and was sent home for palliative care. As an employee of the CGH, Bob was given the use of a hospital bed (which we set up in our downstairs den) and all other necessary equipment needed to care for him and to keep him comfortable. Dr. Denis Deslauriers was Bob's palliative-care physician; he came faithfully to the house whenever Bob or I needed him.

19 July 1983 - Bob's last visit to Dr. Benoit in Ottawa. He could do no more for Bob. Bob was very disappointed, but put on a brave face. After a long period of silence during the car ride home he announced, "I guess God has a vacancy for me in Heaven".

1 September 1983 - Bob seemed to be losing ground all morning and the doctor didn't think that Bob would pull through. He became quite cyanosed in the early afternoon. He was having difficulty breathing and had a constant gurgle in his throat. The physiotherapist came to give Bob a treatment and his breathing seemed more relaxed afterwards. Fr. Kelvin Maloney came at 3:30 p.m. and gave Bob his Last Rites. After his visit, Bob slept until 5:10 p.m. and woke up feeling better. Jacqueline spoke to Bob and told him that it was time to give me my anniversary gifts. Jacqueline knew about the gifts that Bob had prepared for me for our 25th wedding anniversary and she was worried that Bob would not live to see that day (October 11th). Bob, thinking that it was our anniversary, was delighted and wanted to celebrate. I offered him some water, but he asked for some wine! I opened a bottle of Lamberti Castelvetro (his favourite) and Jackie and I had a glass with him. Jackie then fetched Bob's gifts which I opened with him. Many months earlier, when Bob began his religious instruction with Fr. Kelvin to become a member of the Catholic Church, Bob had ordered a papal blessing for our anniversary. When the scroll arrived, Bob had Jackie frame it. When I opened it up, we immediately hung in on the wall facing his bed and put a picture light over it. Bob was beaming from ear to ear when he saw it. His other gift to me was a beautiful two-and-a-half-inch Royal Windsor Cross made of Spode bone china in a rich cobalt blue - a stunning piece of jewellery. I was speechless, need I say. It was an unforgettable moment.

3 September 1983 (3:39 p.m.) - My darling Bob died today. He passed away peacefully at home with Jacqueline and me at his side. He fought a long and courageous battle. He was 63 years old.

6 September 1983 (11:00 a.m.) Bob's funeral Mass at St. Peter's Church in Cornwall. Fr. Kelvin Maloney presided over the service.

15 September 1983 - Picked up our dear friends Bill and Kath Waldron (at whose home Bob and I had honeymooned in Bermuda) at the airport in Dorval, Québec. They were unable to attend Bob's funeral, but were able to make arrangements in time to attend Bob's burial. They travelled from New Zealand, where they were now living.

17 September 1983 (1:30 p.m.) - Bob's burial ceremony at the St. Lawrence Valley Union Cemetery in Ingleside, Ontario. Jackie and I attended the ceremony along with Ian and his wife Janet, and their girls, Carolyn and Arlene. Bill and Kath were also in attendance. Father Kelvin Maloney from St. Peter's Church officiated. We all returned to our house for supper after the ceremony (except for Fr. Kelvin).

18-19 September 1983 - I drove Jackie to Peterborough with Bill and Kath. Jackie was beginning a two-year program in Creative Arts Administration at Sir Sandford Fleming College. After saying goodbye to Jackie at the College on the Monday (19th), we drove home to Cornwall only to find the front door ajar and the house broken in, with things upset all over the floors! Quite a few pieces of jewellery were missing from Jackie's room and mine. The robbers also upset Bill and Kath's suitcases and stole some valuable pieces from them too. The police came to investigate and it was determined that the robbers had entered through the upstairs bathroom window, which had been left open, by climbing on the roof of the stoop above the front steps. I felt as though I had been personally violated and I was so upset for our dear friends, who had been victimized as well.

25 February - 6 March 1984 - Jacqueline and I travelled to Bermuda for ten days. Around the end of 1979, Bob and I had hoped to travel to Bermuda with Jackie, to where our life together had begun. Unfortunately, our dream did not come to fruition due to Bob's poor health. Before Bob died, he made me promise to take Jacqueline back to Bermuda to show her where we had met and fallen in love, and where we had lived happily together for the first 18 months of her life.

22 June 1985 - Jacqueline graduated with a diploma in Creative Arts Administration from Sir Sandford Fleming College in Peterborough.

17 August 1985 - Jacqueline married Barry Graham at St. Peter's Church in Cornwall, Ontario. Fr. Kelvin Maloney officiated.

25 August - 1 September 1985 - I travelled to New Brunswick and Maine with my good friend and neighbour, Sylvia Henderson, who lived across the street from me on 5th Street in Cornwall.

17-24 August 1986 - I travelled with my friend, Phyllis Eamer, to Lac St-Jean, Québec.

2-19 February 1987 - I travelled to Vero Beach, Florida with a side trip to St. Petersburg and Cypress Gardens, with Sylvia and Phyllis.

7 July 1987 - Suzanne Marie Graham was born in Peterborough, Ontario; Jacqueline and Barry's first child, my third grandchild.

20 September - 5 October 1987 - I travelled solo to Virginia Beach, Virginia. Unfortunately, Leona Johnson was not well during my visit.

1-27 February 1988 - Travelled to St. Petersburg, Florida with my younger sister Denise Robichaud and visited with our brother Réal Chamberland and his wife Mado, who were also vacationing in Florida for the winter.

2-16 October 1988 - My last visit to Leona's in Virginia Beach. Her health was very poor and I had to encourage her to eat well. She was very discouraged and I tried to help her accept her cross. I bought her a lovely glass ornament in the shape of a book that opened up and was decorated with flowers. On it was written the poem, "God grant me the Serenity, etc. " I hoped it would give her courage. Sadly, Leona died nine months later in July 1989. She was in her 85th year.

18 February - 18 March 1989 / 26 February - 30 March 1990 - Denise and I travelled to Pass-a-Grille and St. Petersburg, Florida.

2-26 March 1991 - I travelled solo to Pass-a-Grille, Florida and visited with my brother Réal and his new wife Thérèse Bissonette who were vacationing there for the winter. (Mado had died on 1 September 1988.)

7 January - 11 February 1992 - Travelled to Daytona Beach (spent two days there) and Pass-a-Grille, Florida with my friend Jean Scott. We visited with Réal and Thérèse almost every day in Pass-a-Grille and made a day trip to Treasure Island and John's Pass Village with Jean and Thérèse.

4 May 1992 - I found dear Charlie Harcourt in his last sleep in his favourite chair. He probably died on the 1st or 2nd of May. Not seen after the 30 April. What a shock! He was 89 years old.

10 September 1992 - Brendan Joseph Robert Graham was born in Peterborough, Ontario; Jacqueline and Barry's second child, my fourth grandchild.

29 October - 18 November 1992 - I travelled to Jekyll Island, Georgia with my friend Muriel Lauzon. The weather was cruel, so windy, we could hardly walk. Days Inn had only breakfast, mainly eggs and bacon. We ate all over the Island and visited every museum and shop - nothing else to do! The last couple of days we had improved weather and we witnessed a kite competition on the beach - really interesting. Muriel was a good sport; I enjoyed her company.

13 February - 5 March 1993 - Disaster- Muriel and I travelled to Daytona Beach by bus (Jolly Tours) with "ROWDY" crowd and weather was the worst in years! Muriel was the only bright point. She is a good companion.

1-18 May 1994 - Travelled to England. Stayed overnight on the 1st of May in Montréal with my niece and her husband, Yolande and Sylvio Beauregard; had a lovely visit with them. They drove me to Mirabel Airport the next day to catch my flight to London. I arrived at Heathrow Airport on the 3rd. Checked in to the Aber Hotel on Crouch Hill, the same B & B where Bob, Jacqueline and I had stayed on our first trip to England in 1971. Stayed in London until 7 May and visited everyday with John and Joan Sperr (Bob's brother and sister) at their residence in Highgate Village. John owned an Antiquarian Bookstore on High Street and their home was above the shop. Joan and I met each day to do a bit of sightseeing and shopping after a nice lunch at one of the local pubs. In the evenings, we would have dinner together with John at the house. On the 7th, I took the train to Brighton to spend a couple of days with Bob's cousins, Don and Liz Nicoll, and Don’s mother, Lily and his sister Annette Heath. Returned to the Aber Hotel in London on 9 May and spent more time with John and Joan over the next two days. Then I travelled to Winchester by train on the 11 May to meet an old friend, Sheila Wort and her husband, Frank. It was nice to see Sheila after 23 years and to meet her husband Frank. Together we visited Westminster Cathedral and the Edinburgh Wool Shop. I stayed in a B & B overnight in Chandler's Ford, near Eastleigh where Sheila and Frank lived. We had a lovely visit together. Sheila was near tears when I left the next day, and so was I. We had only known each other for a short few weeks in 1971, but corresponded since. We felt close. (Mom met Sheila when Dad had his lung surgery at the Kingston General Hospital. Dad shared a room with her husband. Sadly, Sheila's husband passed away shortly after. Frank was Sheila's new husband.) I spent the next five days back in London, and had a lovely time with John and Joan. We had our last supper together on the 16 May and after our sad goodbyes, John drove me back to the Aber Hotel. He told me he enjoyed my visit and my interest in his favourite subject - books! His last words to me were, "Don't be too long coming back!" I arrived safely back home on the 17 May. Yolande and Sylvio, and my brother Raymond and his wife, Guite, met me at the airport. We had supper together and a nice visit. I drove home to Cornwall the next day. What a happy trip. I hope to go back VERY soon to see John and Joan.

Spring of 1995 - I went to England; lovely trip. Visited with Bob's brother and sister, John and Joan, in London and with Bob's cousin and his wife, Donald and Elizabeth Nicoll in Lewes. (Donald was Uncle Dave and Auntie Lily's son.)

January 1996 - I sold our house in Cornwall at 604 Fifth St. East.

15 January 1996 - After almost 13 years of living alone, I moved to Peterborough to be near Jacqueline and her growing family. I moved into Cathedral Court at 333 Brock Street, apt. #220, Peterborough, Ontario K9H 7P1 (Tel: 705-748-0726). I'll enjoy being close to Jackie and family. Now I can see my grandchildren grow up. Pity Bob won't be with us.

15-30 April 1996 - I went on vacation to Bermuda. I had a wonderful time visiting old friends.

27 June 1996 - Maureen Frances Graham was born in Peterborough, Ontario; Jacqueline and Barry's third child, my fifth grandchild.

Spring of 1997 - Solo trip to England; lovely trip. Again, I visited with Bob's family.

4 July 1997 - My granddaughter, Carolyn MacDonald, married Michel Lamy at St. Patrick's Church in Markham, Ontario. Reverend Michael Waites officiated.

20 October 1998 - I underwent a pulmonary lobectomy to remove a spindle-cell carcinoid tumour from my left lung. The biopsy showed that it was non-malignant. Dr. J. W. Martyn performed the surgery at the Peterborough Civic Hospital. I spent one week in hospital recovering.

18 May - 1 June 1999 - Went to England; unfortunately, my companion Jean M. was most incompatible. A disaster! She was an old friend from the States, but we had nothing in common except old memories. She was very rude to people wherever we went: insulting the stewardesses on the plane (both ways) and aggressive in every shop or restaurant we went to. I could not wait to return home. A nightmare. Much regretted trip.

Despite it being an overall disaster, I did enjoy some good moments. We spent five days in York. Beautiful. Also went to Ringmer for two days at the Nicolls'; so pleasant with invitation for 2001. Rest of the time spent in London with short trips around London's most important "spots". Visited the Sperrs with an invitation to supper every day spent in London (except Fridays). They were both well and I enjoyed my visits with them.

13 November 2004 - Today, going through many things, I found this book (Journal dated 23 October 2000). All is well, getting on in years, 81 yrs. & 3 mos., at a slower pace, but still going. That's all I ask. Jacqueline faithfully spends time with me once a week. I look forward to the day, presently - "Wednesdays". She is the light of my life and my reason to keep going on.

13 December 2004 - Noëlle Anne Lamy was born in Markham, Ontario. Carolyn and Michel's first child; my first great-grandchild.

1 March 2005 - Today, I made my last drive in my Ford car (Tempo). Tomorrow, Jacqueline will drive it away. I decided that my driving days are over. (This was recorded in Mom's "Birthday Book". Mom was turning 82 the next day and her driver's license was expiring. By this time, Mom's sense of direction was diminished and she was feeling less sure of herself behind the wheel. Having always been a sensible woman, she recognized and accepted her recent limitations, and decided to give up her driving privileges which she had enjoyed for over 45 years.)

1 May 2006 - I moved to 1434 Sherbrooke Street W., Apt. #328 (in Peterborough). Same phone #748-0726. I have a small apartment called a studio; one-and-a-half rooms. All meals are provided by the residence and they are excellent. Many distractions (activities) are available. I play bridge twice a week; I have attended games of Trivial Pursuit and I play carpet bowling to replace missing players. The walk around the building is a quarter of a mile long; I try to walk my mile daily. There are many other things to join.

26 June 2007 - Samuel Alexis Lamy was born in Markham, Ontario; Carolyn and Michel's second child, my second great-grandchild.

November 2007 - My apartment is comfortable enough, but I am terribly lonely. The residence is a very long distance from everything: church, shopping area, etc… I have met many people here, but made no friends so far. Our daily food is excellent, and all quite comfortable, but my greatest pleasure is playing bridge twice a week. I do walk around the building for exercise, about a quarter of a mile, but too far to go anywhere else on foot. I hope to move soon to an area where I can meet my friends and do some small shopping when needed.

Now, at 11:00 a.m., October 9th 2008 - I did move to 481 Reid St., Apt. #204 at Jackson Creek Retirement Residence (Peterborough) on 1 October 2008, and so far quite pleased with it all, especially being within walking distance of church; so I am grateful.

Today, November 5th, 2008 - I am quite satisfied and hope to stay here now forever. I can go to church, to Mass on Sunday without any difficulty, so all is well, and hope to never move again.

Today, 19th November 2008 - I am quite comfortable here and hope never to move again.

Today is the 3rd May 2009 - I am quite happy here in all ways. Jacqueline takes me out every Wednesday to do shopping if needed and dine out. It gives a bit of activity this way. The food is good and pleased with the apartment, very small 1 room, but comfortable.

4 June 2009 - Still everything well. Thanks.

1 August 2009 - My granddaughter, Arlene MacDonald, married Joseph Byles at the Belcroft Estates in Gilford, Ontario.

23 November 2009 - All's well so far. I like it here. People are pleasant and meals are good.

30 December 2009 at 2:40 p.m. - I just finished reading this whole book. (Two journals, dated 23 October 2000 and 13 February 2007 were written in the same notebook). It has been quite interesting, but I am also rather lonely in my apartment. Food is very good.

Today, 9 June 2010 - All's well. Still going out Wednesdays and look forward to it. At the moment we are "trapped" in our rooms because a few "flues" have started and they hope to avoid more cases. It is a bit lonely, but wise to do so.

9 June 2010, later in the day - Things are generally O.K. However, today we are asked to stay in our rooms, meals will be brought to us. Two cases of the flu are the cause and they hope to prevent a larger number. It is rather lonely, but it is wise. They are hoping to prevent more cases.

It is 3:20 p.m.; the "soleil" is touching my shoulder (as I sit by the window in my room). I hope all this will stop (lockdown). It is to protect us. The last one (flu outbreak) was many cases and they hope to prevent that. I am lonely, but I appreciate their rule.

27 November 2010 - Today, still here and all is right.

19 September 2011 - Payton Taylor Byles was born in Dubai in the United Arab Emirates; Arlene and Joe's first child; my third great-grandchild.

Today, 7th February 2012 at 8:15 p.m. - All's well.

Mom continued to enjoy life at Jackson Creek for nearly two more years, remaining there for just over five years until December 2013. In the beginning, Mom participated in many craft activities making greeting cards and seasonal decorations, and enjoyed games of carpet bowling and word games of all sorts. She remained an avid crocheter until about 2011, and enjoyed making granny squares with the Saturday-morning knitting club, who made quilts for the local youth shelter. She also participated in the exercise programs which were offered twice a week, and enjoyed her daily walks around the block. Being a lover of music (especially classical music and music from the 30's, 40's & 50's), Mom never missed a concert or recital, which took place two or three times a week in the residence lounge. Mom also enjoyed visits from the therapy dogs who would visit twice a week. Wednesdays were Tuck Shop days at Jackson Creek, and Mom and I would look forward to our weekly visit with Sharon and her husband Cliff (who ran the Tuck Shop) as we browsed through the many sundries displayed on the tables. The highlight of Mom's week, however, was the celebration of the Mass. Mom looked forward to celebrating the Mass with Father Andrew Bégin every Thursday morning in the residence chapel, and again on Sundays at St. Peter-in-Chains Cathedral, which was a ten-minute walk, uphill, from Jackson Creek. For the first year or so, Mom was able to walk to Mass without any difficulty, but eventually her legs became weak and her sense of direction became less reliable, and she would have trouble finding her way back to her residence. Around this time, one of the volunteers at Jackson Creek, Jacqueline Burke and her husband Jack, offered to pick up Mom every Sunday on their way to Mass. They did this for a couple of years, until their health and Mom's declining memory made it too difficult to manage. Thankfully, Mom continued to enjoy her weekly Mass with Fr. Bégin at the residence and as her memory worsened, he would knock at Mom's door upon his arrival to say hello and to remind her of the Mass. As it was, she would often fall asleep in her lazy chair after breakfast, and was always so grateful for his thoughtful reminder.

As time went on, Mom's memory loss progressed and her physical health declined along with it. Mom, who had always enjoyed walking, began using a cane and then eventually needed the use of a walker. She no longer walked around the block, but enjoyed the footpath which wrapped around the residence. During inclement weather, she would walk up and down the halls, on all three floors. Just as Mom’s physical strength and energy were declining, so was her interest in the activities she once enjoyed. Mom became more of an observer and participated less in the activities she attended. Music, however, remained a source of joy for Mom, and although she could not recall all the words of the songs she heard, she would often sing a few words here and there or would hum along with the melody.

Mom and I continued to enjoy our weekly visits together, usually on Wednesdays. When Mom lived at Sherbrooke Heights, we would eat our lunch in the dining-room and then head into town, to run our errands. When Mom moved to Jackson Creek, we started eating out, to give Mom a change of menu. For many months we ate at Tim Horton's, but as their menu became too rich in sodium, we switched over to Wendy's restaurant. We both loved their salads and wraps, and so it became our weekly lunch destination!

In February of 2011, our daughter Suzanne returned from Peace River, Alberta with her fiancé, Josh Wheeler, after living there for five years. Shortly after her return, Suzanne began to join me on my Wednesday visits with Mom and this continued until Mom's death in 2014. We dubbed these weekly visits our "Nana Days". Occasionally, we would have lunch together at Jackson Creek and enjoy the company of Mom's friends, but as the meals were rather expensive, we usually went out for lunch to our favourite spot, "Wendy's". After lunch, we would spend the afternoon shopping, visiting friends, or enjoying a walk through Jackson Park or the Peterborough Zoo. Mom's favourite stores were the "Dollarama" or "Buck or Two", which suited her Depression-era mindset to a tee! We enjoyed these times together, sharing our experiences across three generations, and their memories will be treasured forever. Eventually, Mom needed the use of a wheelchair. We soon got used to hauling it in and out of the car and pushing it through the snow, ever grateful that it gave us the opportunity to continue our outings together on our Nana Days.

In the fall of 2012, Mom's health took a turn for the worse. She experienced weak spells and was found on two occasions lying on the floor beside her bed in the morning, having fallen sometime during the night. Shortly afterwards, we discovered that she was losing significant amounts of blood in her urine. Before the family doctor could determine the cause, Mom was admitted to the Peterborough Regional Health Centre in Peterborough on 29 November 2012, suffering from severe anaemia. She required a blood transfusion of four units of blood. Tests indicated that a tumour was present in her bladder and surgery was scheduled to be done as soon as the blood transfusion was complete. The following day, on 30 November 2012, Mom underwent ureteroscopic surgery under the skilful hand of Urologist, Dr. William Meade. The biopsy results of the tumour came back positive for an invasive urothelial carcinoma high grade.

Gratefully, Mom recovered very quickly from her surgery and she was in relatively good health by Christmas. Dr. Meade suggested monitoring Mom's condition by scheduling regular cystoscopies. The first of these was done three months after Mom's surgery on 5 February 2013 and everything looked clear. Given the aggressive nature of Mom's cancer, Dr. Meade was pleasantly surprised by Mom's clean bill of health. He suggested that she return in six months' time for another cystoscopy rather than put her through another stressful procedure in three months' time. Her next check-up was scheduled for August 27th. In the meantime, Mom resumed her usual activities and Suzanne and I continued our regular weekly visits with Mom on our Nana Days.

By now, Suzanne and Josh's July 13th wedding was fast approaching. Wedding plans were in full swing as Suzanne and I visited several bridal shops, cake decorators, florists, party rental shops and printers. Mom joined us on many of these outings and enjoyed all the activities and excitement. Although she would forget from visit to visit that her granddaughter was getting married, she was always pleased to hear the news and enjoyed taking part in the planning, as it unfolded in the moment.

Suzanne and Josh were married at Burnham Gardens in Peterborough on July 13th 2013. Mom was in very good form that day. Her hair was freshly styled and she was wearing her bright floral-print dress in hues of purple, blue, fuchsia and green with a matching full-length jacket. She looked absolutely beautiful! She was still very weak on her legs, however, and needed some assistance with her walker as it was an outdoor wedding and the ground was rather uneven. Fortunately, during the formal photo shoot, family members were on hand to discreetly "prop" Mom up. Overall, the day went rather smoothly with the help of a Red Cross nurse, Helen Lowry, whom we hired to assist Mom during the wedding ceremony and until the dinner was served. Mom enjoyed the festivities and was delighted to be reunited with her youngest brother, Jean-Guy Chamberland from Longueuil, Québec who travelled with my cousins René and France Chamberland from St-Jean-sur-Richelieu, Québec.

Perhaps it was the sight of her granddaughter in her beautiful wedding gown or perhaps it was the grace of God, either way, Mom seemed to grasp the significance of the day and was caught up in the joy of the festivities. Her presence on this momentous occasion meant the world to us, especially after her ordeal in December when we were doubtful that she would live to see this day. Now, on this happiest of occasions, are joy was complete.

By the end of August 2013, Mom was slowing down considerably and was taking lots of naps. Her checkup on the 27th with Dr. Meade indicated that the tumour was growing again in her bladder. The doctor resected the tumour and scheduled Mom for a return visit in three months. Given Mom's age, cystectomy (removal of the bladder) was not an option. Dr. Meade's main concern was to keep ahead of the tumour to prevent the return of any bleeding. Mom returned to the hospital on 26 November for another cystoscopy. By this time, the tumour was encroaching upon her right kidney and Dr. Meade scheduled Mom for another cystoscopy and transuretheral resection to take place on December 19, 2013. It proved to be a difficult resection as the right uretal (kidney) orifice could not be cleared. The resection went quite deep into the muscle and one area was very thin and bleeding. Mom suffered acute renal failure following the surgery and required a catheter because of the bleeding. She remained in hospital for exactly three weeks as the doctors (Dr. Meade and Dr. Garth Hanson, the Nephrologist) monitored her creatinine levels and fluid retention. Throughout this time, Mom remained in good spirits and was grateful for our daily visits. She never complained, and always had a kind word for her caregivers. On Christmas day, Barry and I, along with Suzanne, Josh, Brendan & Maureen celebrated with Mom in her hospital room. She was delighted to be surrounded by her family.

By this time it was clear that Mom would never return to her home at Jackson Creek as she could barely stand, let alone walk, and needed frequent assistance for personal care. Just one year earlier, on December 31st, Mom was deemed eligible for admission to a Long-Term Care Home and days before her surgery, Mom was placing in the top five on the waiting list for Extendicare Lakefield (our first-choice home). It was just a matter of time before a bed became available. However, we knew that Mom could not remain in the hospital indefinitely. We went in search of a home that offered enriched care as a temporary measure. On 7 January 2014, Barry and I visited the Empress Gardens in Peterborough and while we were touring the facility, we received a call on our cell phone from Karen Smith, Mom's case manager at the Community Care Access Centre. She had wonderful news for us... Extendicare Lakefield had a bed for Mom!

Mom was discharged from the Peterborough Regional Health Centre on 8 January 2014, three weeks to the day after her surgery. It was a bright and sunny day under blue skies and the snow was sparkling in the sun. After being confined to a hospital room for three weeks, Mom was in awe of the lovely wintry landscapes as we drove from Peterborough to Lakefield, oblivious of the fact that we were taking her to her new home at Extendicare Lakefield. We arrived at 11:00 a.m. and were warmly received by Lori Sage from Admissions who escorted us to Mom's room, number 422, in Trent House.

From the moment we walked through the doors, we knew all was well. From the warm reception we received from the staff, to the beautiful large red silk rose that was placed on Mom's pillow, we felt that this was "home" for Mom.

Mom, of course, was very confused in the beginning, but the staff was very patient and understanding, and within a couple of weeks, Mom was visibly settled and content in her new surroundings. Albeit, she still had moments of confusion and would ask about her old apartment and the whereabouts of its contents, but for the most part, she was enjoying herself and making new friends. By March, Mom was gaining strength and started using her walker, with supervision at first, but eventually was able to get around on her own without difficulty. Everyone was amazed at her recovery.

Life was good for Mom during this period as she was very involved in the social activities of the home and had many friends to keep her company. Suzanne and I continued our weekly visits and enjoyed some outings with Mom in Peterborough, although we mainly spent our Wednesdays with Mom at the residence, enjoying whatever activities were happening on that day.

Around the beginning of March, it was suggested to us by the home's social worker, Sandy, that we keep a journal in Mom's room to record her social activities and visits. In this way, Mom could be reminded of the activities she had participated in, which she might have forgotten.

This journal turned out to be a blessing. Looking back through its pages, we are reminded of all the wonderful moments we shared with Mom in her last year. I have included these journal entries as part of Mom’s story as I feel they encapsulate the memories of a very precious time with Mom...

12 March 2014 - Today, you had lunch with your daughter Jacquie and your granddaughters, Suzanne and Maureen. After lunch we did some armchair exercises with Hannah, and you really enjoyed kicking the big pink ball around in the circle. Unfortunately, the music was cancelled for the afternoon because of the blizzard outside, so we just relaxed in your room after exercising. You enjoyed a nap in your reclining chair while the girls rested on your bed and read a National Geographic magazine. The snow is falling steadily outside your window as I am sitting here writing in your journal. The three of us will be leaving you shortly to go home before the roads get too snow-covered. It's been a lovely afternoon, Mom, and I'm glad to see you are settled in and looking so well. Love, Jacquie xox

12 March 2014 - I also had a nice little nap today :) Maureen

12 March 2014 - Had a visit with Jeannine in the Montessori Room, folding laundry and doing a puzzle. Sandy - BSO/PSW (Behavioural Supports Ontario/ Personal Support Worker)

19 March 2014 - The Feast of St. Joseph - Suzanne and I came to visit you today and we enjoyed a lovely lunch together by the large fish tank. After lunch we joined Hannah and the other residents in some armchair exercises. Afterwards, we enjoyed a lovely hour of musical entertainment with Hal Allison at the monthly birthday pub while you ate some chips and Cheezies for a snack. At the end of the pub, Hal announced all the birthdays for the month and yours was the first one to be called out! You were so surprised that he knew the date of your birthday! It was a lovely afternoon. Love, Jacquie xox

19 March 2014 - Had a visit and a walk. Had Jeannine help with sorting of buttons, in coloured tray. Re-directed Jeannine back to her room and engaged in conversation about her afternoon visit with family. Will see her tomorrow. SP - BSO

21 March 2014 - Jeannine and Sandy spent time together in the Montessori Room, engaging in a couple of activities. She had made a handbag for her daughter as a surprise. SP - BSO

23 March 2014 - Barry and I took you for a lovely afternoon drive in and around Lakefield. The weather was cold, but beautiful and sunny. You enjoyed looking at the trees and houses and the snow-covered landscapes. We also saw three lovely white swans in the Otonabee River that runs through Lakefield. Love, Jacquie & Barry

25 March 2014 - Jeannine went to Laughter Yoga. She had fun today. Julie - Activities Assistant

26 March 2014 - That's wonderful, Julie, thank you! JG

26 March 2014 - We had an exciting day today! We had lunch in Peterborough at Wendy's restaurant and you enjoyed the "Apple Pecan Chicken Salad". Next we went to the Dollarama store and purchased some craft materials for us to use together - we will have our very own craft day soon! We also went to Wal-Mart and enjoyed looking at some of the new garden ornaments that have arrived for spring. There were lots of garden fairies and bobble-head turtles and frogs!

We arrived back home around 3:30 p.m. and you and Suzanne took turns reading "Little Women", a book we purchased at the Dollarama store this afternoon. You read aloud quite well and enjoyed the story very much.

While you were reading with Suzanne, Shirley (another resident), came in to visit with us. We had a lovely chat together and you were very happy that she popped in to see you. All in all, it's been a great day :) Love, Jacquie & Suzee

30 March 2014 - We enjoyed a lovely afternoon of poetry with Josh and Debara (Activity Assistants) while sipping on cups of Cream of Earl Grey tea. It was very enjoyable! Jacquie & Barry

1 April 2014 - We have enjoyed another lovely afternoon together! Mum and I enjoyed our lunch of "pork bites", with blueberries for dessert. After lunch, Briena (Activity Assistant) came by to start on a "Welcome Board" for you, asking you about where you grew up, your favourite colours, activities, music and many more. She said you could work on it together on Thursday. We are excited to see the finished product!

Next, we rushed off to our daily exercises with Hannah. As always, your favourite part was kicking the big pink ball around the circle!

Last week, while we were out together, we bought some paint supplies and today we decided to try them out! You painted a "Welcome" sign in lovely bright colours. Mum painted a picture of a bird and I, a bird house - a good pair! We made a bit of a mess and had to go clean up!

We are now at the quiet part of the day, and dinner will be served shortly. Mum and you are taking turns reading from "Little Women" as I am updating this journal. It is a cloudy day, but we saw our first robin of the season today, so spring must be right around the corner!

We are already looking forward to our next visit! Much love, your granddaughter, Suzanne xox

6 April 2014 - We enjoyed a lovely stroll down the main street of Lakefield (Queen St.) today, admiring the many shop windows with all their Easter decorations. The sun was shining brightly and the weather was lovely and mild (12C). The robins and squirrels were out and about enjoying this fine spring day! Lots of Love, Jacquie & Barry

9 April 2014 - It has been a bright and beautiful spring day! You enjoyed your drive to Peterborough (where we had lunch at Wendy's restaurant) admiring the scenery and the trees as we drove along. After lunch we stopped in at the bulk food store (Bulk Barn) and the dollar store (Dollarama) to purchase a few things that I (Jacquie) needed.

The highlight of our afternoon was a trip to the Peterborough Zoo. You enjoyed visiting the emus, wallabies, ibises, lemurs, wild cats and meerkats! It was lots of fun.

Right now, we are sitting by the fish tank and you are enjoying a nice cup of tea :) Love, Jacquie

13 April 2014 - We went for a walk today around your residence. We walked along Fraser Street, D'Eyncourt and Clementi streets. We went as far as the river (which was flowing swiftly) and enjoyed the squirrels and birds along the way.

Hope you have fun making your Easter egg wreath tonight with Debara! Love, Jacquie & Barry

16 April 2014 - Suzee and I took you to Peterborough today and we had lunch at Wendy's restaurant. You had your favourite salad, "Apple Pecan Chicken". We did a little shopping afterwards at Rexall Drugstore and Wal-Mart. On the way home we stopped at McDonald's to pick up some tea and muffins to enjoy in your room. Suzanne brought her Tablet (computer) with her and we enjoyed looking at her wedding photos from last July as we sipped on our tea and munched on our muffins. It was a lovely afternoon! Love, Jacquie & Suzanne

Easter Monday - April 21, 2014 - You had a lovely Easter dinner at Jacquie and Barry's house with all the family. Suzanne and Josh helped prepare the meal. We feasted on turkey and stuffing with cranberries as well as, squash puff, baked potatoes and asparagus. For dessert we had strawberry-rhubarb pie and ice cream. It was a lovely family gathering. Love, Jacquie *(Sadly, this was Mom's last meal at our house.)

23 April 2014 - Suzanne and Josh came with me today to visit you. We had lunch together in the dining-room - a Western omelette with corn muffin and mixed vegetables. After lunch we listened to Hal Allison as he sang some songs for us at the pub. Love, Jacquie, Suzanne & Josh

16 May 2014 - Brendan and I came for a quick visit today, now that everyone is feeling better. We enjoyed a lunch of chicken salad sandwiches with a Greek salad, and pears with maple cake for dessert. Yum! As soon as we finished, we headed off to exercises with Hannah. We met a new friend, Maxine, along the way. She was lonely, so you invited her to come along with us. We all played with the big pink ball until Hannah arrived. Then Hannah let me lead the ball bounce during exercises since I did a good job :) You were a bit tired today, but you brightened up when you got to kick the ball! We have just left you in the Chapel, sitting with Shirley and Father Heffernan for a tea party! Sadly, I have to work shortly, so we couldn't stay. We are looking forward to starting our regular weekly visits again on Wednesdays now that Jacquie will be returning from her trip. Much love, Suzanne & Brendan xox

23 May 2014 - It's good to see you after a long time away! First, there was the flu outbreak here at your residence, which started the last week of April. Your residence was under lockdown and no visitors were aloud for three weeks! While you were still under lockdown, Barry and I left on May 4th for a pilgrimage tour of Ireland with our parish priest, Fr. Ken Rae. We were away for two weeks and just returned home this past Monday, May 19th. So, here I am once again, after being away for a month!

Today, we enjoyed a light lunch together - minestrone soup, grill cheese sandwich and cucumber, tomato and onion salad. For dessert, we had peach mousse, and a cup of tea. At 1:30 p.m. we exercised with Hannah and some of the other residents (Fr. Bernie Heffernan, Pauline, Anne, Gloria Morris, Gloria Fox, Phyllis, Shirley, Gill St-Pierre and Donald). You participated in most of the exercises, although you were very quiet. Afterwards, we had a cup of tea (I had coffee) and a couple of biscuits in the Trent lounge.

Presently, you are napping on your bed. I think you are quite tired today. We were hoping to do some baking in the Country Kitchen with Barbara (a friend) for the residence yard sale tomorrow (Saturday 8:30a.m. - 2:00p.m.), but unfortunately it was cancelled. Instead, they decided to do the baking in the regular kitchen.

I think I'll take some pictures of your blue hydrangeas and white carnations (your belated Mother's Day bouquet) while you are sleeping. They look so lovely!

I may pop in tomorrow during the yard sale. See you then, I hope. Love, Jacquie xox

24 May 2014 - It's a beautiful hot and sunny day; a perfect day for your residence yard sale! I joined you for lunch today after singing at a funeral Mass this morning at St. Martin's church. We had vegetable-barley soup, egg salad sandwiches, three-bean salad and stewed rhubarb for lunch. The soup and the rhubarb were very tasty!

After lunch, we went outside to look at the yard sale and then went for a walk around your residence. It was very hot! We found a lovely shaded sitting area at the back of your building (on the north side) and relaxed there beside the willow trees that grow along the pond. It was nice to sit in the cool breeze. We didn't see any ducks, frogs or turtles though :( Then, we came back in and you are presently enjoying a little nap while I update your journal. We (the whole family) hope to be back tomorrow after Mass. Enjoy the rest of this beautiful sunny day! Love, Jacquie xox

25 May 2014 - We enjoyed a lovely walk around your residence today and relaxed beside the pond watching the turtles sunning themselves on the logs. Love, Jacquie, Barry and Brendan

28 May 2014 (Entry made on June 4, 2014) - Today, we had a busy day in Peterborough. At 10:30 a.m. you had a dental check-up and cleaning. At 11:30 a.m. we went to the Eastgate soccer field to watch your granddaughter Maureen play soccer. Her high school team beat the Port Hope team 4-0 in the COSSA semi-final game. Maureen's team later went on to win the final match, which qualified them for the provincial-level tournament (OFSAA) in Thunder Bay next week!

After watching Maureen's game, we had a late lunch at Wendy's restaurant. We decided to go to Landsdowne Place Mall after lunch to look for a new spring coat for you (the one you have now is getting a bit snug on you), but we didn't find one that we liked. Before we knew it, it was after 4 o'clock and we needed to get you home. Suzanne drove you home after dropping me off at Bible study class at Sacred Heart church in Peterborough. You arrived just in time for your dinner at 5:25 p.m.! Love, Jacquie & Suzee

1 June 2014 - Today, is a beautiful warm and sunny day. Barry, Brendan and I walked with you to the canal off Hague St. in Lakefield. We enjoyed watching the boats go by on the canal and the people walking their dogs on the footpath. On our way back to your residence we walked to the beach and saw a few brave people enjoying a swim. I think the water would be a bit chilly at this time of year! We arrived back just in time for your dinner and had a nice chat with Audrey who sits at your dinner table. Love, Jacquie, Barry & Brendan

4 June 2014 - Today, we had a bit of a sleepy day. We enjoyed a lunch of corn-on-the-cob and Greek salad with baked apples for dessert. We had a seat by the aquarium and watched "Larry" and "Mo" and their silver "bodyguards" swimming along. We hurried off to our exercises with Hannah and then went for a walk down to the pond. It was beautiful, but pretty windy, so we didn't stay long. We did see one turtle swimming along. Now, we are sitting in your room and reading from "Little Women". Love, Suzanne & Jacquie

11 June 2014 - What a lovely rainy day today! The gardens were looking lovely! We enjoyed our lunch of fish and chips while enjoying the view. After lunch, we headed off to our exercises with Hannah. You managed to kick the ball right over Gill's head! Goal!

Next, we all headed over to the dinning-room for "Pub Day" and enjoyed some ginger ale and Cheezies. We were feeling sleepy afterwards, and came back to your room to have some quiet conversation. You were all tuckered out and dozed off on us. We will leave you now to run some errands, and look forward to next week's visit when we will be joined by your son, Ian, and his wife, Janet. Love, Suzanne & Jacquie

15 June 2014 - We stopped by for an afternoon visit. It's a beautiful, sunny day and it's Father's Day! We enjoyed sitting at the back by the pond. We didn't see any turtles today, just a few minnows swimming in the water. Love, Jacquie, Brendan & Barry

18 June 2014 - Your son Ian and his wife Janet came to visit you today! They travelled from their home in Stouffville, Ontario. They joined us for lunch in the "celebration room" where we enjoyed a delicious chicken dinner from Swiss Chalet, which Barry and Brendan picked up for us. Suzanne and I arrived around 11:00 a.m. to help you get ready for your big day. The only person missing at lunch was Maureen, who was writing an exam in Biology.

After a leisurely lunch, we went for a walk, all seven of us, down to the river to enjoy the sights along the promenade. We saw a few boats along the canal and many lovely homes and gardens. We walked all the way to the Lakefield beach and then back to your residence. It was a lovely sunny afternoon and you enjoyed your family get-together very much! Love, J, B, Suz, Br, Ian & Janet

22 June 2014 - We enjoyed a lovely afternoon in the Trent garden. It was a lovely sunny day with only a very gentle breeze. There were big white fluffy clouds in the bright blue sky that moved ever so slowly. Two mother robins were sitting on their nests perched in the corners of the eaves. It was a very peaceful afternoon. Love, Jacquie

P.S. You really enjoyed the garden and look forward to visiting it again soon!

25 June 2014 - Today, when I arrived, you were watching television in the lounge area. You were wearing your turquoise dress and pearls and you looked very pretty!

For lunch you had the corn-on-the-cob with Greek salad, and I had a mushroom omelette with mixed vegetables and garlic bread. For dessert, we both had baked apples with pound cake and lemon cake (you had the lemon cake). It was a very filling lunch!

After lunch we had a sing-along with Dan Armstrong. We had a songbook to follow along with the lyrics and we both enjoyed singing many old-time favourites like, "You are My Sunshine", "My Wild Irish Rose", "It's a Long Way to Tipperary", "Danny Boy" and many more!

Presently, you are resting on your bed while I update your journal. I will be leaving you shortly to attend my Bible class at 5:00 p.m. in Peterborough.

Suzanne sends you a big hug; she is at home today, nursing a sore throat and a cough! She looks forward to seeing you next week. Love, Jacquie

29 June 2014 - We enjoyed a relaxing visit together on the Trent terrace this afternoon. The trees and flowers were blowing in the breeze and we could hear the sound of the leaves rustling in the wind. The birds were flying about "cawing" and "chirping" as they went about their business. You enjoyed the peacefulness of the garden as well as the company! Love, Jacquie & Barry

2 July 2014 - Suzanne and I joined you for lunch today. We had breaded fish, mixed vegetables and mashed potatoes with gravy. For dessert we had frozen raspberries and Jello. After lunch, we joined Hannah for exercises. At 2:15 p.m., we all went to the horse races! You won $40 (fun money) on your first bet with Unbearable Bear! You didn't win any other races, but you had fun watching Redonkulous Donkey, Rocky Road the Horse, Monkey Business, Mint Chip the Penguin and Hoptimistic the Frog race down the track to the finish line.

After the races, we relaxed in the Trent garden (you were napping with Suzee who had her head resting on your shoulder) where the birds were singing and the leaves of the trees were rustling in the gentle breeze. Love, Jacquie & Suzanne

9 July 2014 - What a beautiful sunny day! We finally have a break in the rainy weather that has plagued us the past few days! The flowers in the courtyard look happy, though! We told you about the young doe we saw by the side of the road on the way here.

We had a light lunch today of chicken nuggets and potato salad with slices of pineapple for dessert. Yum! We hurried off to our exercise session with Hannah, next. There was a much bigger group than usual, and we all felt chatty today!

As a special treat today, Eileen Hennessy, an Irish singer and guitar player, came to entertain us! She told us she remembered you from when she performed at your last residence, Jackson Creek Retirement Residence. You know the words to many of the songs this time, which must be because you remember her.

We have just finished trying on some new clothes we bought for you to check the size. You got two new sweaters, two pairs of pants, a skirt and a coat! You looked lovely in all of them! It's always exciting to get new clothes! You got your exercise standing up and sitting down to try them all on, though! We are all a little tired now, so we will probably have a rest. Until next time... Love, Suzanne & Jacquie

13 July 2014 - Today is a very special day! One year ago today, your granddaughter Suzanne was married to Josh Wheeler :) You attended the wedding along with your brother Jean-Guy Chamberland from Longueuil, Québec and your nephew and his wife, René and France, from St-Jean-sur-Richelieu, Québec. It was a lovely day, and you enjoyed it very much.

This afternoon, you and I sat outside in the courtyard. It was warm and sunny. The wind was blowing a refreshing breeze through the courtyard and we could hear the rustling of the leaves and plants in the garden. We also saw a robin feeding her young in a nearby nest. Suzanne and I will be back tomorrow to visit you! Love, Jacquie

14 July 2014 - It was another special day today! Suzee (your granddaughter) and her husband Josh and I joined you for lunch. You, Suzee and Josh had turkey and potato salad with a pickle and a bun, and I ate baked eggplant parmigiano with rice. The soup was beef barley. The eggplant and the soup were delicious! For dessert there were fruit salad and tiramisu pudding. After lunch we exercised with Hannah. Barry (my husband) and our son Brendan and daughter Maureen arrived at 1:40 p.m. while we were exercising. After exercise class, we sat outside on the terrace under a big purple umbrella! Because it was Suzee and Josh's first wedding anniversary yesterday, we celebrated the occasion with a delicious lemon cake made by the same person who made their wedding cake, one year ago. It was just as delicious as it had been on their wedding day! After cake, we sat around the picnic table chatting, reading and snoozing! Everybody was sleepy! I think it was the peaceful atmosphere of the garden and the pleasant sound of the songbirds (robins) that made everyone feel so relaxed. It was a memorable afternoon! Love, J, B, Suz, Josh, Br & Moe

23 July 2014 - Suzanne and I had lunch with you today. We had fish & chips and mixed vegetables with raspberries for dessert. After lunch, we exercised with Hannah and some of the other residents. Following exercises, we brought you back to your room to rest - you were very tired today and you had a bit of a wheeze. We had Caleigh, the RN, check you out. Everything seemed all right, except that she did notice your wheeze. They will make a note of it in your chart.

After Caleigh left, Suzanne read to you from "Little Women"; you listened to the story, dozing on and off.

It was a quiet day today, but it was wonderful just being with you! Love, Jacquie and Suzanne

27 July 2014 -We had a relaxing hour by the pond this afternoon. You enjoyed the many trees and the calm water as we listened to the "cawing" of the noisy crows. The breeze was gentle and the skies were bright blue and sunny.

You will be having dinner very shortly so we are off to the dining-room now. Love, Jacquie & Barry

30 July 2014 - We had a busy day in Peterborough today. We had lunch at Wendy's and you enjoyed an "Apple Pecan Chicken Salad". After lunch we took you to the eye doctor for an eye exam and then we returned to Lakefield. Love, Jacquie, Suzanne and Maureen *(This was Mom's last trip to Peterborough.)

13 August 2014 - It's been two weeks since my last visit! We were away last week in Wasaga Beach, where we spend our annual family vacation. It was very relaxing and we all had a good time at the beach and at Blue Mountain in Collingwood, which is only a half hour's drive from Wasaga Beach.

Today is cool (20C) and cloudy with strong winds. We went to exercises with Hannah after lunch and enjoyed the afternoon pub with singer, Hal Allison. We had ginger ale, chips and Cheezies for a snack!

You were coughing a lot today and had a very bad wheeze. I had the nurses check you out, and they gave you some Ventolin, which seemed to help you breathe more easily. They are going to keep an eye on your breathing from now on.

We came back to your room around 4:00 p.m. and I read to you from "The Secret Garden" (another book we purchased from Dollarama the same day we bought "Little Women") for about 20 minutes while you rested on your bed.

You are anxious about missing your dinner right now (4:40 p.m.) so I will leave you shortly. Love, Jacquie xox

Sadly, this was our last journal entry. Mom's health took a turn for the worse (the start of a series of ups and downs) and we began to focus our energies on Mom's comfort and care. Looking back, I regret not having kept a record of the events that followed as there were many beautiful and uplifting moments with Mom worth recording. These moments of grace punctuated the sad ones with their gift of joy and remain forever imprinted in our hearts, if not on paper.

From the middle of August onward, Mom received daily doses of Ventolin and was put on oxygen 24 hours a day as her oxygen levels were low. Any exertion on Mom's part, such as transferring from her bed to her wheelchair, would cause Mom's breathing to become laboured. Mom's appetite was also diminished, and she required some encouragement and help with feeding. As changes were happening rapidly at this time, I called Fr. Andrew Broda at St. Paul the Apostle church in Lakefield, and asked him to anoint Mom. A day or two after Father's visit, we witnessed an improvement in Mom's health and although she was still very weak and tired, she was less distressed and more alert and was feeding better on her own.

On the 27 August, while Suzanne, Maureen and I were visiting with Mom, my brother Ian arrived on a surprise visit. Mom was delighted to see him and together we spent a lovely sunny afternoon sitting in the shade of the entrance canopy, enjoying recent photos of the great-grandkids that Ian shared with us on his Tablet.

Around the second week of September, Mom's health went downhill again. By this time, she was spending most of her time in bed, except for her meals. She no longer had the energy, or the interest to attend the activities she once enjoyed. Her appetite diminished significantly and although she continued to eat her meals in the dining-room, she required assistance with feeding and eventually was moved from her wheelchair to a geriatric chair to provide her with more comfort and support. She was so exhausted that she could barely hold up her head and would doze off in between bites.

As everything in life has its season, this was now the season of letting go. Gone were the days of eating at Wendy's, running errands, visiting friends, and having leisurely walks in Jackson Park or the zoo. Our days with Mom were now quiet and relaxed. They consisted mainly of helping Mom with her meals and sitting quietly with her in her room, holding her hand while she dozed on her bed. Sometimes, we would read to her from "The Secret Garden" and sometimes we would just read quietly to ourselves, offering her a loving smile when she would open her eyes and look at us. Then, returning the smile, she would go back to sleep, comforted by our presence.

On the final weekend of September, Barry and I attended a Catholic conference in Niagara Falls and Suzanne took over the "Nana duties" while we were away. The following is an e-mail from Suzanne telling us about her visit with Nana on the Saturday (September 27th):

"Today was a really good day! Nana very much enjoyed her time outside. We were out for about 15 minutes, and she wanted to stay longer, but we were on the little tank, and we ran out of air. She was happy to doze, though, while I read to her again afterwards. She was still pretty weak, but she was quite alert, and spoke English most of the time. I'll visit again tomorrow afternoon, and see if we can go out again, depending on her energy level. It seemed to really rejuvenate her! She loved the flowers, and the fall colours, and I played with the wind chime for her, which made her smile. I think mostly she just liked the sunshine and the breeze."

And so the days went, with their ups and downs, but running through them were two unchanging constants: Mom's unwearied courage and grace in the face of suffering, and the unfaltering kindness and compassion of the caregivers at Extendicare. The burden of loss was lessened by these two constants. Although Mom's life was slipping away before us, it was not a time of overwhelming sadness, but one of love and tenderness.

All along Mom's earthly journey, she carried within her a spirit of gratefulness that animated her being and kept her moving forward in all the circumstances of her life, especially in times of adversity. This spirit of thankfulness remained with her till the end and brought peace and joy to her countenance. She was forever grateful for the love and care she was receiving, and always expressed her love and gratitude to those around her with a kind word, or gesture of thanks.

Likewise, throughout the ups and downs, there was always the warmth, tenderness and patience of Mom's caregivers. The kindness and compassion to which they gave witness brought great peace of mind to our family, knowing that Mom was loved and cherished. So loving was their care that Mom would often acknowledge their kindness by blowing them a kiss or giving them a peck on the cheek.

Summer passed into fall and along with the fall colours came the preparations for the Christmas bazaar. November 22nd was the date set for the bazaar and the days leading up to it were filled with activity. There was baking and pickling to do and many festive crafts to make. Mom attended as many of these activities as her strength permitted, often dozing off in her wheelchair, while watching the goings on. She enjoyed the company of these social activities and always had a kind word or comment to share with fellow residents.

On the day of the bazaar, I arrived bright and early at 8:30 a.m. I browsed the tables for about half an hour, and then joined Mom who was finishing off her breakfast in the dining-room. She was pleasantly surprised to see me so early in the day. I helped Mom finish her breakfast, and then we had a good look around at the bazaar. I bought a lovely Christmas centrepiece for Mom's room with a battery-operated candle in the centre and a little paper-plate Christmas wreath to hang on her bedroom door. She was delighted with both of them. Then, we stopped for tea in the chapel and enjoyed some home-baked cookies and beer bread made by the residents while we sat and watched the busy shoppers. Later, we had lunch together in the dining-room and then I left Mom to rest in the afternoon. She was pretty exhausted from all her activity, but was very contented with her day.

As Christmas drew closer, decorations started going up at Extendicare in each of the four Houses. On December 7th, it was Trent's turn to put up their Christmas tree. When I arrived that afternoon, Mom was sitting in the lounge with some of the other residents who had gathered around for the tree-decorating party. Debara and Josh, two of the activity assistants, were busy assembling the tree as it came out of its storage box. Mom looked on attentively as lights, ribbon and ornaments were added to the tree and made it come alive with colour. Mom also had a turn at decorating the tree and hung two ornaments on its lower branches from the comfort of her wheelchair. Cookies and hot chocolate were served and Christmas music played in the background. Mom watched contentedly as the other residents danced around the floor with beaded garlands draped around their necks and Christmas balls hanging from their ears. Time stood still in the joy of that moment as Mom and I were caught up in the gaiety of the festivities.

It has been noted that the dying often leave us with one last happy memory before they depart. For us, that cherished memory was the resident/family Christmas lunch, which took place on 16 December, just eight days before Mom passed away. Looking back, it would seem that Mom knew that the end was approaching and put on a supreme effort that day to make the occasion a memorable one. Barry, Suzanne and I attended the luncheon with Mom and together we enjoyed a traditional turkey dinner with all the trimmings: cranberries, mashed potatoes, gravy, stuffing and carrots. To round off the meal, apple pie and vanilla ice cream were served for dessert with tea and coffee. We were even offered a glass of wine with our meal and we all shared a toast with Mom who raised her glass of tomato juice as we clinked our glasses together. What amazed us all, was that Mom enjoyed every morsel of her food and ate it all without any assistance. By the end of the meal, having exhausted her strength, Mom was ready for a rest. We brought her back to her room, tucked her under her afghan and kissed her goodbye. She drifted off contentedly, having enjoyed a full and pleasing afternoon with her family.

Circumstances prevented me from returning to Mom until 19 December. In the span of just three days, Mom's health had turned drastically for the worse. I arrived at supper time on the 19th and couldn't believe the change I saw in Mom. She was sitting in her "Geri-chair" in the dining-room and her head was drooping. When I attempted to feed Mom some minced turkey and vegetables, she could barely open her mouth at each spoonful. Her eyes were closed, and she would only take nibbles.

Things were pretty much the same the next day. Mom had barely eaten all day and when I arrived at supper time all she could manage to eat was an "Ensure" butterscotch pudding and half of a glass of "Ensure" strawberry beverage. I took Mom back to her room after supper and she sat in her Geri-chair dozing on and off, waiting for the caregivers to prepare her for bed. Her last words to me before I left were, "Oh, my darling!" and she gave me a big hug. This was the last time Mom spoke to me.

By December 22nd Mom was experiencing pain, moaning and groaning and calling out for help. To relieve Mom's discomfort, the charge nurse gave her a catheter and some morphine. She was resting peacefully when I arrived. As soon as Mom saw me, her right arm wrapped around me and she gave me a long hug as she lay on her left side. I had a good cry and a long talk with Mom while she lay there resting. She couldn't talk, but she was listening intently.

On the 23 December, Mom developed a fever. When Barry, Suzanne, Brendan and I arrived at 12:30 p.m. she was resting peacefully in her bed with her rosary placed beside her on her pillow. Maureen arrived sometime later, around 2:30 p.m., and Ian and Janet arrived at 3:30 p.m. At 6:00 p.m., Father Andrew Broda came to administer the Sacrament of the Sick to Mom. We all held hands and said the "Our Father" together around Mom's bed with Fr. Andrew.

Barry and I arrived at Extendicare Lakefield at 1:00 p.m. on December 24th. Mom was resting peacefully; the morphine was keeping her comfortable. She was unable to speak, but she could turn her head and open her eyes (her left eye was mostly shut). Her mouth was open when she breathed, so we moistened it frequently with dampened oral mouth sponges. Barry and I recited the Rosary (Glorious Mysteries) and the Chaplet of Divine Mercy for Mom. Suzanne, Brendan and Maureen arrived around 5 p.m. from Christmas shopping. At 6:30 p.m. we left Mom to attend the 7:00 p.m. Christmas Eve Mass at St. Martin's church in Ennismore, which was 15 minutes away. Suzanne remained behind with her Nana. Mom was resting peacefully and appeared stable. Before taking leave of Mom, I explained to her where we were going and told her we would be back in a couple of hours. I also told Mom that if Jesus came for her while I was gone that she would have to go with Him and not wait for me to return. I told her how wonderful a Mother she had been to me and that I had had a most wonderful journey with her. I thanked her for being my beautiful mother and kissed her goodbye. I held her left hand for a moment and squeezed it and she squeezed my hand twice in return. I cried even more after that and I thanked her - it was her way of saying goodbye. Her left eye was mostly shut, but her right eye was open and showed such tenderness and understanding.

We arrived at the church around 6:45 p.m. and by 6:51 p.m. we received a text from Suzanne saying, "You need to come now" and again at 6:53 p.m., "Hurry". Brendan and I left the church immediately and Barry and Maureen followed us a few minutes later (we had come in separate cars). Barry and Maureen were delayed because Maureen had to change out of her altar server vestments. Brendan and I arrived at Extendicare at 7:10 p.m. and Suzanne was waiting for us at the front doors, shaking her head and sobbing, "She's gone!" We were hugging each other and sobbing when Barry and Maureen arrived, five minutes later.

At 7:00 p.m., on the Night of all nights, my beautiful mother, Jeannine, gave up her last breath.

They say

we all come into this world with nothing...

but I had a remarkable mom

who fed me and led me,

provided and prayed for me,

loved and encouraged me,

sacrificed her needs for mine,

gave me happiness,

acceptance and self-worth...

So, really, I came into this world

with everything.

Thank you for loving me

and for helping me discover

the blessings that come

from the One who loves us all.

Your kindness, devotion,

and countless acts of love

gave me my first glimpses of God.

(Verse taken from a birthday card that I gave to Mom in 2009.

I found it among her keepsakes.)

Nana's Homemade Vegetable Soup

12-16 cups chicken broth (from chicken powder - 1 tsp. per cup of water)

1/2 cup brown rice

1 or 2 onions, chopped

1 cup celery, chopped

1 cup cauliflower, chopped into bite-size pieces

2 carrots, sliced thin

1/2 cup (or more) canned tomatoes

1/2 - 3/4 cup pasta (like elbow macaroni)

Spray with parsley, celery seed, pepper, a little oregano or any favourite herb.

Rinse brown rice thoroughly and place it in a large stock pot. Add remaining ingredients except for the pasta and bring to a boil. Once soup reaches a boil, turn down heat and let simmer for about an hour. When rice is nearly done, stir in pasta and simmer for 8-10 minutes until al dente.

* * * * * * * * * *

MACDONALD, Jeannine Marie Madeleine (née Chamberland)

Passed away peacefully at Extendicare Lakefield on the 24th of December 2014 in her 92nd year. Beloved wife of the late Robert MacDonald (1983). Loving mother of Jacqueline (Barry) Graham, and step-mother of Ian (Janet) MacDonald. Cherished grandmother of Carolyn (Michel), Arlene (Joe), Suzanne (Joshua), Brendan and Maureen. Great-grandmother of Noëlle, Samuel and Payton. Cherished big sister of Réal (Thérèse) and Jean-Guy (Fernandes). Predeceased by her parents Auréal Chamberland and Magda Magnan and her siblings Yvette, Yvon, Raymond and Denise. Fondly remembered by many nieces and nephews. Family and friends will be received at COMSTOCK FUNERAL HOME & CREMATION CENTRE, 356 Rubidge Street, on Monday, December 29, 2014 from 2-4 & 7-9 p.m. Funeral Mass will be held at ST. MARTIN OF TOURS CATHOLIC CHURCH, 513 Ennis Rd, Ennismore on Tuesday, December 30, 2014 at 2:00 p.m., Rev. Father Andrew Bégin officiating, to be followed by a reception in the Parish Hall. A private family interment will be held at a future date. In Jeannine’s memory donations may be made to the Alzheimer Society Peterborough Office, or the Respect Life Office Diocese of Peterborough. The family would like to thank the wonderful staff at Extendicare Lakefield, especially Trent House, for the care and compassion shown to Jeannine during her time there. Online condolences may be made at www.comstockfuneralhome.com.