Jacqueline Brenda Ryan

Mom was born Jacqueline Brenda Gooch on December 1st, 1943 in Richmond, Virginia to Robert Reginal Gooch and Virginia Fern Whiting. Mom always talked of a happy childhood with her parents and spending lots of time with her extended family on a farm in rural New York. She especially loved taking the long, scenic train rides back and forth to New York and talked of the 4 feet high snow that would come up to the second story window during the New York winters. As mom and her sister, Patty, grew older they spent less time in New York and more time back in Richmond, where they lived with their parents. She and her sister Patty grew up in an age when young ladies wore dresses and etiquette was taught in school. Mom would tell us stories about coming out parties, sock-hops, and getting suspended from school for smoking in the bathroom.

Mom enjoyed her childhood and teen years and remained close with her parents whom she described as loving, fun, and supportive. She and her mom were especially close. Mom decided to follow in her mother’s footsteps and attend the same Business College as her mother who had a successful career with the telephone company. Mom had just completed her first semester of Business College at age 18 when she lost her mother to suicide. This was a shock to the whole family. Mom was very close with her family and this event devastated Mom, her father, and her sister, who at the time had two small children. The family’s grief was heavy and Mom dropped out of school to become a care-giver and income earner to help support her family. As Mom and her family “picked up the pieces,” Mom re-entered social life.

She was a beautiful and vivacious young woman and was loved by everyone who met her….with the exception of Joe Ryan. When Joe and Brenda met it was not love at first sight. Dad thought she was a bit “stuck-up” and Mom would say “he walked like a swabby right off the deck”. They were brought together by mutual friends, and when Mom’s car broke down one evening, Dad and his big wonderful heart fixed it for her. That was it for Mom. Brenda and Joe married on May 23rd, 1969. Since that day you would rarely see one without the other close by. Their love and marriage was the example for us of what a great relationship looks like. We were very blessed.

Family was important to Mom and she loved to travel, so we have so many memories of family vacations in an RV – most of which went awry and have become known as “Ryan Adventures”, but that was all part of the fun. While Dad was a free spirit, Mom was a serious planner. She loved order and everything had its place….exactly where she put it! We would joke that God kept her here so long because he wasn’t quite ready to have her take over in Heaven. Mom’s faith in God was incredibly strong, though. Even though she loved concrete plans, predictable situations, and control, she trusted God in everything. That trust was her greatest well of strength. Jacqueline Brenda Ryan truly showed us all just how it’s supposed to be done.

Mom had a determined mind and never let anything get in her way. She was a force of nature and the strongest person I have ever known. Throughout her life she found great joy in serving others and volunteering. She especially loved being part of the Pastoral Care Team and visiting cancer patients at the local hospitals. I deeply believe that God allowed her to deal with cancer in such long stages to build up the strength she would need to encourage and uplift so many others battling as well. Only those who have come through the fire themselves can fully understand and witness to those who are still there. Love you, mom.

In lieu of flowers the family asks that you make a donation to the Port Charlotte United Methodist Church. Thank you.