Jacqueline H. Stalnaker

December 24, 1935October 10, 2020

Jackie Stalnaker died peacefully on October 10, 2020 at Sunrise Assisted Living in Raleigh. Jackie was born in Ball Ground, Georgia on December 24, 1935 to Morgan and Ernesta Haithcock. After graduating from Cool Springs High School in Forest City, NC she attended Women’s College of Greensboro, now UNC-Greensboro. She would later transfer to UNC-Chapel Hill, graduating with a degree in journalism in 1958. While studying at UNC-Chapel Hill, Jackie was inducted into The Valkyries, the highest academic honor society for women at the time. In Forest City she met the love of her life, Clay Stalnaker. They were married in June of 1958.

Before becoming a mother, her professional career utilized a diversity of Jackie’s gifts. Her first job as a writer for The Charlotte Observer drew on her journalism skills. After moving to Raleigh, she became the administrative assistant to the NC State Campus Minister which highlighted Jackie’s organizational skills and her love of people. While working in campus ministry, Jackie organized the first lesbian organization on NC State’s campus which included faculty and students. In 1980, after raising her two sons, she began her career with the North Carolina Department of Vocational Rehabilitation. She retired from that Department in 2010.

Jackie enjoyed life to its fullest. Among her interests were: reading, art, cooking, tennis, swimming, playing bridge, attending the symphony, and traveling. Spending time with her granddaughter, Claire, became her greatest joy in her later years. For 25 years, Jackie and Clay, enjoyed the friendships made in their marriage enrichment group. The group of 15 couples met weekly along with a number of marriage enrichment retreats throughout those 25 years.

Jackie is survived by her husband of 62 years, Clay Stalnaker; her two sons, Mark of Newton, NC and Brent of Raleigh; NC; and her granddaughter, Claire, the delight of her life.

In lieu of flowers, the family asks that donations be made to Pullen Memorial Baptist Church in supporting the homeless population of Raleigh. A family memorial service will be held at Pullen Memorial on Thursday, October 15.

If you would like to leave a message of condolence to the family, you may do so below within "add a memory".


  • Visitation

    Thursday, October 15, 2020

  • Funeral Service

    Thursday, October 15, 2020


Jacqueline H. Stalnaker

have a memory or condolence to add?

Sam McKnight

October 27, 2020

There are many good memories of being together with Clay and Jackie, at church, at parties, playing tennis, and on it goes. We were blessed having you as friends. May grace and peace be with you.

Joe Gomez

October 20, 2020

Dear Clay,
I was so sorry to hear about Jackie's passing. I remember with fondness the lunches she and I had when she was involved with Encore programing. On occasion, I think that I played "hard to get" about teaching in Encore just so we could have lunch together. She always struck me as so kind, witty, caring, and smart.
With much sympathy to you and your family,
Joe Gomez

Gail OBrien

October 15, 2020

Jackie was one of the most marvelous people one could ever know. My sincere condolences to you Clay and the other members of the family. Gail O'Brien

Nancy Huber

October 14, 2020

It was a true joy to get to know Jackie and her husband Clay through OLLI. I loved her spirit, her intelligence, sense of humor, and treasured her friendship. My heart goes out to Clay and his family. I know this is a huge loss, but she will always remain alive is so many hearts.

Mickey Gault

October 14, 2020

Dearest Clay,

Jock and I are sad to hear of Jackie's death. How we remember dearly the West Raleigh and beach years we spent with each other's families and friends. That group gave us the family we needed when our own was so distant
We send our love to you, Mark, Brent and Claire.


Ricki Hiatt

October 14, 2020

Jackie was a joy to have as a friend! She was one of the most delightful people I've ever known. She showed such great compassion for others. I admired her actions on behalf of those less fortunate or down trodden by prejudice. I will miss her as will all who had the privilege of knowing her. Clay - I wish you the time to grieve but with the knowledge that Jackie would want you to find pleasure in life again - just as she always did.

Joe and Ann Mann

October 14, 2020

Ann and I send all our love as we join you in sorrow for Jackie’s death. I remember her commitment to racial and gender justice and her ability to care deeply. Her work with campus ministry was significant. We will always remember her wonderful laugh and humor as we are so appreciative of her friendship. Joe and Ann Mann

David Zucker

October 13, 2020

Mark, Clay, and Claire,
I'm sorry to hear about Jackie's passing. She did many good things and was always nice to me. Tonya and my thoughts and prayers are with you at this time. David and Tonya Zucker

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