Phyllis Oakley Bandini

Phyllis Oakley Bandini, 76, passed away peacefully at her home in Raleigh, North Carolina, on Sunday, August 31, 2025. Born July 28, 1949, in Seattle, Washington, she was the daughter of the late Howard Oakley and Beverly Bates Oakley.

Phyllis grew up in Seattle with her brother, Bruce Oakley, and sister, Susan Trautman. She attended Covenant College, a Christian liberal arts college on Lookout Mountain near Chattanooga, where she met Gerald “Jerry” A. Bandini. They married in 1970 and shared 55 years together. Their long marriage was a significant part of her life and remained a defining relationship over the years. Her deepest joy came from her family. Phyllis was the proud mother of three: her eldest son, Jeff Bandini, and his wife, Jeanine, and their daughters, Anna and Claire; her daughter, Jennifer Bandini; and her youngest son, Jeremy Bandini, his wife, Erin, and their children, Dylan, Julia, and Owen. She is also remembered by her sister, Susan, and her husband, Andy, of Memphis, along with their children, Caleb Trautman and Jessica Abernathy.

She was preceded in death by her parents and her brother, Bruce Oakley.

Phyllis was a gifted educator and mentor. She taught at Sanderson High School in Raleigh and earlier worked as an English assistant across elementary, middle, and high school levels. Later, she served as an ESL tutor for children of Research Triangle families, guiding many from their first years of school through high school. She served as PTA president for each of her children’s schools, working tirelessly to support their education and opportunities.

Phyllis’s warmth and outgoing spirit meant she “never met a stranger.” She cherished her “lunch bunch” friendships, enjoyed shopping, and always greeted salespeople by name. She was known as one of the best-dressed teachers in her school. She was an avid fan of UNC Tar Heels basketball and rarely missed a televised game. She loved to travel, decorate, and garden. She stayed active throughout her life, embracing each stage with energy and grace.

Above all, Phyllis devoted herself to her family. She taught her children that they could accomplish anything they put their minds to, and when setbacks arose, she showed them how to stand back up and persevere. She leaves behind a legacy of resilience, kindness, and love, carried forward by her children and grandchildren.

The family is grateful for the compassionate support provided by Transitions LifeCare in Raleigh.

A Memorial Service will be held on Saturday, September 13, 2025 at 11:00 am in the Chapel of Mitchell Funeral Home, with a Luncheon to follow within the Reception Room. Flowers are welcomed; however, memorial contributions in her honor may be made to Transitions LifeCare - 250 Hospice Circle - Raleigh, NC 27607.

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