Marylee Gatov Pence

Marylee Gatov Pence, affectionately known as Merrily, passed away on December 22, 2024, at the age of 80. Born on June 16, 1944, in Glendale, California, to Robert Danz and Ruth Eva Border Danz, Merrily exuded creativity, energy, and an adventurous spirit (ofttimes mischievous) from an early age. Even after the loss of her father at the age of five, her hoydenish* nature was undiminished. Two years later, her mother remarried Dr. Max Gatov, who adopted Merrily and her older brother, Janaka, expanding their family with the addition of stepsister Andrea Gatov and eventually a younger brother, Michael Gatov.

Merrily's adventurous nature persisted throughout her life. She enthusiastically pursued a wide range of activities, including sports, dancing, surfing, sailing, camping, motorcycling, white-water rafting, singing, and acting. Her love for exploration and new experiences filled her life with vibrancy and joy.

At twenty-four, Merrily married Ted Schamel after a whirlwind romance, and they were soon blessed with a daughter, Marguerite Nicole, lovingly nicknamed Niki. With her characteristic humor and practicality, Merrily chose the name Niki to suit her daughter’s spirited nature. However, due to circumstances beyond her control, Merrily divorced Ted shortly after Niki's birth. Despite the challenges of single motherhood, Merrily’s resilience and determination shone brightly. With the steadfast support of her grandmother Marguerite, Merrily worked tirelessly as a licensed vocational nurse (LVN) and property manager, ensuring a stable and nurturing home for Niki.

In 1973, Merrily relocated to Little River, California, to assist her parents Ruth and Paul Tay (Ruth’s last husband) in establishing The Woods, a pioneering retirement community. Initially balancing multiple roles to support herself and the growing community, she worked as a waitress at Gregory’s Restaurant and as a charge nurse at Sherwood Oaks Convalescent Hospital. As The Woods flourished, she transitioned to a full-time role as its dedicated property manager. Her commitment to her work and community was unwavering.

Faith played a central role in Merrily’s life. As a devoted member of the Mendocino Presbyterian Church, she taught Sunday School, directed the Adult Choir, founded the Children’s Choir, and uplifted the congregation with her powerful soprano voice. Her passion for music extended beyond the church to The Mendocino Theater Company and The Gloriana Opera Company, where she charmed audiences for over three decades.

In 1977, Merrily married Joe "Skip" Pence, who adopted Niki. Their shared love of singing and participation in the Cursillo Movement were hallmarks of their life together. Though their marriage ended in 1991, Merrily faced this new chapter with the same strength and grace she applied to all challenges, balancing careers in real estate and managing her family's Christian bookstore, The Good Book.

Merrily’s resolve was evident in her battles with health challenges, including chronic sciatica, spinal stenosis, knee degeneration, and systemic lupus. Despite these hardships, her spirit remained unbroken. She found immense joy in her daughter’s marriage and in the arrival of her beloved grandsons, Aidan, Michael, and Evan.

A life of compassion and service, Merrily also served as a chaplain at Mendocino Coast Hospital, offering comfort and guidance to those in need. Her quiet acts of kindness touched countless lives, embodying selfless love and support.

Merrily’s legacy of love, compassion, and resilience continues through her family and the many lives she touched. She will be remembered as a beacon of light, a safe haven, and a tireless supporter. Her grace in suffering, vibrant spirit, and boundless love made her an inspiration to all who knew her.

Merrily is survived by her older brother Janaka Param and family, her younger brothers Michael Gatov and Christ Tay (by marriage) with their families, her daughter Niki Kolokithas, son-in-law Steven Kolokithas, and beloved grandsons Aidan, Michael, and Evan.

A Celebration of Life for Merrily Pence will be held on Thursday, March 27th, at 4:30 PM at the Mendocino Presbyterian Church, with a reception to follow in Preston Hall. We invite you to join her family in honoring the remarkable life of service Merrily devoted to her community. Her legacy spans the theaters, the arts, the churches, and the hospital, where her contributions touched countless lives. Let us come together to celebrate her enduring impact and the joy she brought to all.

In lieu of flowers, the family requests donations be made to the Mendocino Presbyterian Church’s music and children’s ministries or the ASPCA in honor of Merrily’s love for her rescue animals.

*The meaning of HOYDEN is a girl or woman of saucy, boisterous, wild, or carefree behavior, especially in a way that is considered inappropriate for a girl or woman. Synonyms of hoydenish include tomboyish, unladylike, and unruly.