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Rollins Funeral Home

1401 Hudson Road, Rogers, AR

OBITUARY

Pamela Lee (Smith) Gayer

September 6, 1951February 4, 2020
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Pamela Lee Gayer, 68, of Little Flock, died Tuesday, February 4th, 2020, at Mercy Hospital in Rogers. She was born September 6th, 1951 in San Antonio, Texas to the late Howard Eugene and Jane Catherine Jordan Smith.

Her family moved to NW Arkansas when she was a young girl and lived here the remainder of her life. She was a homemaker devoted to her family while volunteering many hours to her children’s school. She loved all her adopted dogs and cats over the years, taking in strays whenever they showed up. She enjoyed crafting for many years and especially loved being a grandmother and great grandmother. She was an excellent cook until her later years when acute pain forced her to become a homebody who loved watching TV and shopping endless catalogs.

Survivors include her husband, Burley Gayer of Little Flock; two children, Cory Gayer (Becky) of Bentonville, Lindsay Bien (Eric) of Springfield, Missouri; four grandchildren, Tad Gayer, Caitlin Gayer, Baileigh Chadwick and Brayden Gayer; two great-grandchildren and a 3rd due next month; one brother Steve Smith (Sally) of Big Fork, Arkansas; two nephews and one niece; and many other relatives.

Visitation will be 5-7:00pm, Friday, February 7 and her Funeral Celebration is at 10:00am, Saturday, February 8, 2020 in the Chapel of Rollins Funeral Home in Rogers with Pastor Tony Harrison officiating. Cremation will follow with eventual burial with her husband at Boatright Cemetery in Madison County.

In lieu of flowers, memorials are suggested to Rogers Humane Society for Animals Inc, 407 E Nursery Rd, Rogers, AR 72758 or www.nwahumanesocietyforanimals.org

Arrangements are under the care of Rollins Funeral Home in Rogers. Condolences may be expressed at www.RollinsFuneral.com

Services

  • Visitation in the Chapel Friday, February 7, 2020
  • Funeral Service Saturday, February 8, 2020

Memories

Pamela Lee (Smith) Gayer

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Burley Gayer

February 11, 2020

Continuation of Baleigh's facebook page:

• Amanda Gayer I’m so sorry for your loss. You truly had the most amazing grandma and she adored her grandchildren! Prayers coming your way!
• Ami Glover I'm so sorry!! She was an amazing lady! She loved me like I was one of her own kids.
• Tad Gayer Those videos are too much for me right now. I'm going to miss her so much!
o Baileigh Chadwick Tad Gayer Me too, I’m here for you
• Tanner Roberson I’m so sorry Baileigh. She was a sweet woman.
o Baileigh Chadwick Tanner Roberson I really appreciate that Tanner. I’m glad you got to meet her.
o Tanner Roberson Baileigh Chadwick I am too.
• Steve Barnes I sure did love her with all my heart and soul!!!!!!!

• Lindsay L Gayer Bein Oh babygirl, this post breaks my heart. We need to see if we can put those video clips on the memorial video. I love you kid.
o Baileigh Chadwick Lindsay L Gayer Bein I wish I had clips with her voice that were long
• Dawn Walker Oh Baileigh I’m so sorry to hear that your grandma passed away. I am glad you have so many
wonderful memories with her. Praying for you and your family.
o Baileigh Chadwick Dawn Walker thank you. So many of those memories are circling my brain and are what have been making this experience easier to understand as the time moves.
• Tammy Rhodes Knox I’m so very sorry for your loss 🙏🏼
• Brianna Whorton I’m so sorry B, she was a very sweet lady❤️ if you need anything let me or mom know, we love you like family.
o Baileigh Chadwick Brianna Whorton I’m glad I have you and your family there, and always have been.

Burley Gayer

February 11, 2020

From our grand daughter Baileigh's Facebook post:

Baileigh Chadwick added 14 photos and 3 videos to the album: Farewell 🌿🌵💐🍁🌼🌻.
February 4 at 3:19 PM ·

Last night we lost a very special woman. She was the best I had ever seen with no one coming close to her poise, her personality, the way she would joke.. she had a love like no other. A instinct willed grater than her faith, to love her family, even those who were not blood; to teach other the wonders of her past experiences... I will miss how she tells stories, but will not forget because I will hear her when I speak, for I tell stories the same way. I will for ever remember the way her face would light up when we/anyone would drop by for a visit. Maybe it was she who started my love for plants. Thank you for loving crafts as much as you do because your tools help me make what ever my heart wanted to do. THANK YOU for being there arms open when you only heard my voice have a different tone. I’m thankful I knew to just stay on the phone talking and making a super long voicemail just so you had time to get to the phone, you ALWAYS answered. Thank you for leaving me in great hands, the ones I know you knew would always be there. Ne, thank you for teaching me every thing you ever did, taking the time and energy to keep up. Thank you for being so cute that you labeled your top 3 favorite lipsticks, we made sure you will be wearing your number 1. You were an amazing wife, mother, literally the best grandmother anyone could have asked for. Kindness and uplifting love always radiated through the house, and with everything I said and everything I could keep talking about... Farewell Ne, you will be missed greatly, forever, but will always be felt.. because I know you will be watching.

38You, Lindsay L Gayer Bein, Cory Gayer and 35 others
16 Comments
Love
• Michelle Love Madden Sending you love, B.
• continued:

Burley Gayer

February 11, 2020

From our grandson Tad's Facebook post:

Tad Gayer is with Baileigh Chadwick and 2 others.
February 4 at 10:24 AM ·
You are an amazing woman and even better Nana. I am sad you didn't get to meet my son but I will make sure he knows his loving, beautiful, fierce, and kind Nana Pam. Just know that you are deeply loved and will always be remembered. Rest in peace Nana🙏❤️

56You, Cory Gayer, Lonnie Gayer and 53 others
18 Comments
Love
• Rylan Robinson Sorry for your loss brother! 🙏🙏
• Steve Barnes I am so sorry for your loss!!!
May she R.I.P.
• Dawnnell Lea I’m so sorry, Lindsay and family. Praying for His peace for all of you.
• Merri Lawson So sorry Tad
• Ami Glover I'm so so sorry for your loss. She was an amazing woman. She was like a second mama to me, I spent as much time with her as I did with my own family. Lindsay L Gayer Bein love you bunches let me know if I can do anything.
o Lindsay L Gayer Bein Ami Glover thanks lady. She really was 2nd momma to a lot of folks. Love you too.
• Amanda Gayer That’s a great picture! Sending prayers your way. So sorry for your loss. Rest in peace Pam,
you were greatly loved.
• Danny Wilson I am sorry to hear , give Berly and all my prayers
Lindsay L Gayer Bein Danny Wilson thanks, I'll pass them along.
• Missi Bright Martin I’m so sorry you all. She was so kind to me.
• Whitney Schrader Sorry for your loss🙏🙏😢😢
• Lori Mark Merritt I’m so sorry to hear about Pam. She was always so sweet & welcoming. Keeping you & your family in my prayers. Love you Tad Gayer!
• Kelly Holloway-Charlton Many prayers for you and your family
• Patty Haefner Sorry for your loss. If there is anything y’all need let us know.
• Angela R Estep So sry Tad. 😥🙏 God Bless y'all.
• Terry Cops So sorry Thaddeus. Love ya
• April Dively Sorry about your loss, Tad. Hugs
• Joan Price Sorry for your loss Tad.

Burley Gayer

February 11, 2020

Continuation from Eric's Facebook post:

• Tara Oliver Sorry to see such a sad post. May you celebrate her and the live she gave to you all. Big hugs
• Tani Lynn Your in my thoughts and prayers. Sending hugs and love your way
• Kelly Mooneyhan Hugs to you and your family!
• Scotti Inmon So sorry for your loss! Love you!
• Terri Shanks So sorry for your loss. We love you!
• Michael Knapp Sorry for you and your family’s loss. You’re in my thoughts today.
• Dawnnell Lea Love you guys.
• Dawnella Bennett I’m sorry for your loss, you guys will be in my prayers! Love you all
• Laura Scott I’m so sorry! She sounds like a beautiful person. Now you all have an angel who guides and watches over you. ❤️❤️💔💔
• Debbie Hill So very sorry for your loss. Love to all
• Brad Wrightstone Sorry brother. This is never easy. Praying for your family to heal in time!
• Becky Shanks So sorry. Love you guys
• Roberta Baker Schirmann You guys are in my thoughts and prayers!
• Lonna OConnor Thoughts and prayers for you and your entire family.🙏🙏💗
• Arthur Gene Sewell I am so sorry for your loss. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.
• Sam Robertson Sorry for your loss brother

Burley Gayer

February 11, 2020

Facebook post from our son-in-law Eric Bein's page:

Eric Bein
February 5 at 7:30 AM ·
I am so very saddened by the loss of a dear sweet woman. She welcomed me and my children into her family with open arms. She was a doting mother to my beautiful wife and her brother, loved her grandchildren and great-grandchildren and was a wonderful example of family love. Thank you Pam for everything. Even though I knew you for far too short a time, I loved you.

Lindsay L Gayer Bein is feeling heartbroken with Baileigh Chadwick and 3 others.
February 4 at 7:28 PM
My madré, my momma, my mudder, my best friend, has gone to heaven this day. When she talked of her time to go she said she was so excited to be with her Daddy again and to watch Cleo the basset hound running to her. This woman y'all... she was a spit fire and a little bit old person crazy but she loved so strongly! There are so many stories I want to remember that they all seem to be bottlenecking and won't come out. She spent the better part of the last 20 years in some kind of pain, so tonight I will be grateful that she is at peace. I will mourn my loss of this amazing human, mourn for the time we have lost, but I will be thankful for all the life treasures she passed on to all those who came in contact with her. You are missed so much mom, already. I have been so blessed to have the family I have grown up with. I love you.
For anyone wanting to know, the viewing will be this Friday from 5-7 and her Celebration of Life will be Saturday at 10. Both will be held at Rollins Funeral Home. We are asking in lieu if flowers that you make a donation to the Rogers Humane Society or a charity of your choosing. There will be an online signing through Rollins for anyone who would like to leave her a message. We would love to hear any memories you care to share. I believe that should be up by Thursday.
27You, Elizabeth Bein and 25 others
18 Comments
Like
• Erin Tice (((Hugs)))
• continued:

Burley Gayer

February 11, 2020

Continuation of Cory's Facebook post:

• Kevin Calhoun Praying for strength and love for you and family.
• Kevin Green Prayers for you and your family! 😢
• Shawna Specht Paulson So sorry for your loss Cory💞
• Miles Boyce This made her happy. Great pics
• Sherrie Frick Schooley Sending prayers and love to you and your family Cory.💝
• Nilson Clark Condolences, my man.
• Flint Boyce Whoa! Cory! Deep Breaths Brother!
• Erin Usher Blanton Sorry for your loss Cory, I’m sure she is very proud of the man she raised and the beautiful grand babies you gave her to love. May she Rest In Peace.
• Terry Cops So sorry my brother. May she Rest In Peace. GOD bless you all.
• Paula Wishon Prayers for you & your family.
• Cherri Pinkerton Peace be with you and your family! 🙏❤️
• Lori Mark Merritt I’m so sorry for your loss Cory Gayer. Sending prayers for strength & comfort. Your mom was the sweetest & always welcomed us into her home. She had a beautiful smile & loved her family dearly.
• Scott Young So sorry to hear of your loss, our thoughts are with you and your family
• Larry Penick So sorry cory, your mom was the best!
• Marceia Reynolds So sorry Cory Gayer! Praying for you and your family!
• Justen Hoffmann Hulce Man so sorry to see this Sir. Jans and my condolences to you and your family and her friends.
• Susan Gayer I was sad to hear about your mom. All of you are in my prayers ..
• Cheyne Dake Sorry for your loss Cory. Sending prayers !
• Jason Winchester So sorry for your loss buddy. Prayers sent your way.
• Chad Millican I’m so sorry brother for this worlds loss and heavens gain
• Erich Pietzsch Sorry for your loss! Praying for you and your family

Burley Gayer

February 11, 2020

Continuation of Cory's Facebook post:

• Al Buckner So sorry for your loss Cory.
Praying for you and your family.
• Kacee Philip I'm so sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. Much love and hugs to you all. ❤
• Dee Anne Davis-Owens I am so sorry Cory Gayer.❤️
• Megan Loveday Sorry for your loss. We'll be keeping your family in our thoughts.
• John W McCullough Oh Cory, I’m so very sorry for your loss my friend! God’s Blessings on you , your family and others who are suffering her loss... praying for all of you...
• Rosetta Murphy Fletcher Sorry for your loss. My deepest condolences.
• Brandon Boeneke Sorry to hear this! You and your family are in our prayers!!
• Dixie Gilmore I’m so sorry Cory! What a sweet looking lady. I hope you are doing ok and can find peace with family during this time.
• Connie Gayer So sorry for your loss Cory. Praying for your family.
• Charles W. James Sorry for your loss Cory. Praying for you and your family brother
• Brenna Kayser I’m sorry Cory Gayer! Take care!
• David Roberts Sorry Brother! Lots of prayers coming your way
• Ross Kephart Praying for you, brother. So so sorry to hear of your loss.
• Patti Ortiz Lashley Cory, I am so sorry for your loss. Your mom must have been a remarkable woman, she raised you. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Love to you my friend ❤️
• Scott Ruble Sorry for your loss Cory. My thoughts and prayers of comfort for your family during this time.
• Nicholas Adam Lawrence Stay strong, love you bro.
• Laura Lovell Hartman So sorry Cory! Love ya friend, God bless!
• Summer L Wright I’m so sorry for your loss Cory Gayer! Prayers for you and your family.
• Mike Whalen Sorry to hear this old friend
• Eric French So sorry for your loss Cory.
• Jim Milligan Praying for your family, so sorry for you loss 😢
• Sandra Boyce-Hamilton I’m so sorry for your loss of your Mother!
Prayers for God’s peace and comfort!
• continued

Burley Gayer

February 11, 2020

Continuation of Cory's Facebook post:

• Brian C. Waters Praying for you and your family my friend.
• Sarah Elizabeth So sorry for your loss and I will always remember my precious aunt Pam from when I was a child and she was always so kind to us all!!!
• Paul S Hunt So sorry for your loss my friend! Prayers
• Shaun Malik Sorry Cory. Prayers for you and your family.
• Arthur Kemper Praying for you and your family. God bless!
• Brian Lasley Prayers for you and your family
• Lisa Johnson So sorry...she was such a sweet soul.
• Tony Crowsey Praying peace
• Andrea Kay Stumbaugh Sorry for your loss ❤️❤️❤️
• Holly Lewis Thoughts and prayers of comfort to you and yours 🙏🏼
• Mary Ann Speed Green I'm so sorry to hear this Cory! You and your family will be in our thoughts and prayers!
• Shannon Owens-Dale I’m so sorry Cory! Sending much love and many prayers! ❤️
• Dustin Gerbig Sorry for your loss Cory
• James Gates Very sorry to hear this Cory, let me know if there's anything I can do for you. Prayers for you and your family.
• Michelle Peterson Baughman So sorry for your loss Cory, you and your family are in our thoughts and prayers ❤️
• Rob Baugh Very sorry for your loss🙏
• Brett Beavers My thoughts are with you and your family.
• Waynell Renfro Sad news, God Bless🙏
• Albert Pelayo Sorry for your loss.
• Christopher Harper Perdomo Cory
Sorry for your loss. Thoughts and prayers coming your way. 🙏
• Kathleen Jordan Hansel Love you Cory so sorry to hear this 😪
• Tammie Oliver Cory I’m so sorry for your loss. Prayers for you and your family!
• Tammy Wilson May fond memories of your mother bring you comfort during this hard time in your life. Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
• David Fleming III So saddened by this news Cory. She was such a special lady. You and your family are in our prayers.
• Glenda Conner Rightmire So sorry for your loss, prayers for your family 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
• Danny Guess Sorry for your loss Cory.
• continued:

Burley Gayer

February 11, 2020

This is a facebook post from our son Cory's page:

Cory Gayer
February 4 at 4:39 PM ·
Rip my sweet dear mom. I know your dancing with the angels and taking care of all the pets you rescued over the years. Your love and guidance molded me into the man I am today. I will be forever grateful for that and love you with all my heart.

110You, Lindsay L Gayer Bein, Cory Gayer and 107 others
93 Comments
• Eric Wood Sorry for you loss my friend
• Brian Cops Condolences my friend....
o Christy Cops From the whole Cops family. ;)
• Carla Brandow Hodges I’m so very sorry 🙏🏻
• Kelly Holloway-Charlton Many many prayers for you and your family
• Michael Johnson Thoughts and prayers....sorry for your loss
• Clint Chastain Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.
• Robin Bockholt Sorry to hear Cory. Prayers for you and your family!
• Khristeen Rose Condolences
• Amanda Gayer So sorry for your loss. My prayers are with you and your family. Your mom was a sweetheart and I know she is doing exactly what you said!
• Amber Reinemann So sorry about you mom! 🙏🏼
• Alexis Shelton You are all in my heart thoughts and prayers. I sure loved your momma
• Randy Odglen Prayers my friend
• Kimberly Casper So sorry.. May she rest in peace.. many prayers❤
• Mark Wiedebusch My heart is with you and your family my friend.
• Terry Birdcreek Sorry for your loss. Prayers. 🙏🙏
• Dawn Mackey Wood So sorry to hear this. Prayers for all of you!
• Greg Sanders Cory, I’m so sorry for your loss. Please know that I praise for peace and comfort for you and your family.
• Matt Gaines Cory Gayer, I'm sorry my friend.My thoughts and prayers go out to all your family
• Laci Myers-Edwards My condolences
• Nadja Streit I am so sorry to hear about your loss!! Praying for you guys!!!
• Nestor Grump Sorry for your loss... 🙏🙏🙏 To you and your family
• Cassandra Murray So sorry for your loss. Prayers for your family
• Jax Young Healing and strength
• continued:

Burley Gayer

February 11, 2020

Continuation of Lindsay's Facebook post:

• Roberta Baker Schirmann So sorry for your loss! Prayers your way ❤
• Cody N Tonya So sorry
• Jill Nicole So very sorry! Hugs and love your way
• Tonya Lile-Cody Sorry for your loss
• Misty Ptomey So sorry for your loss! Sending prayers your way
• Lashena Wheat Ohh Lindsay L Gayer Bein I am so sorry sweetheart you have all my prayers. I know this ache and the peace at the same time. I will continue praying for you and your family.
• Darrell Slawson I'm so sorry for your loss, that's terrible, but at least she's at peace, I know it doesn't help though
• Amber Mahlstedt Sorry for your loss sweet lady.
• Tara Oliver Celebrate her wonderful life and what she left behind 😍😍. Sorry for your loss.
• Davis D Hughes I’m sorry to hear your loss.
• Jolana Church Sending you my love, prayers and hugs!
• Carey Dawn Thorne-Rippe Oh lovey, soo terribly sorry for your loss. Healing thoughts headed your way for you and yours! 💗
• Tammy Wilson Condolences from our family to yours. May your memories give you peace and comfort.
• Karl N Michele Plepla Sorry for your loss
• Linda Bein My thoughts and prayers are with you Lindsay. GOD BLESS
• Robert Leazer I’m sorry for your loss Lindsay!
• Carmen Shanks Bein Lindsay L Gayer Bein, my heart breaks for you. Losing your mom is one of the hardest experiences you will have in life especially when you haven't had time to somewhat prepare yourself and didn't really get to say good-bye. could never and would never want to try to replace your mother but I promise you both I will do my level best to be cognizant and capable to fill in for her wherever I am able. Although I never knew your mom, after reading the comments by those who did, I firmly believe that she would do the same for me. 😘💕💙💕🙏🙏🙏

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Biography

Eulogy from Lindsay during the funeral service:

I am going to share a little bit about mom and the things she taught me and moments we shared. Both my parents taught me that humor can help you deal with hard times, so bear with me. Sprinkled throughout will be our kind of humor. I tried to keep myself in check.

I had an amazing upbringing. I was lucky to have both of my parents teaching me about life and how to live it. I had the best of role models who taught me a traditional marriage could look easy, but it was something that you had to work for. They had over 43 years together. That is something to strive for, and something to cherish. She would tell me frequently how dad was her soul mate and she just knew from the first moment that she wanted to always be with him. In the recent years they would have dinner dates in her room, since she didn't get out much otherwise. She told me how much she enjoyed those casual dinners and how it was the little moments that meant so much.

My mom was a homemaker, which she was awfully proud of. That’s all she ever wanted to be was a wife, a mother, and a grandmother. She made sure we were always taken care of and she took pride in looking her best for dad when he came home. Apparently she also didn't want to be apart from her daughter. When I started kindergarten, she could not bear to leave, so she sat in the parking lot the entire time. At one point one of the employees even came out to tell her I was fine and it was okay to go home, but she stayed. She volunteered my entire elementary years, from crosswalk guard, to home room mom, to lice check lady. I never had lice, but I used to pretend my head would itch so she could look through my hair. It was my “sneaky” way of getting my hair played with, even though I’m certain she saw right through it.

She was an excellent cook. In fact, she never quite mastered how to make just enough food. We always said she was a reincarnated army cook. I remember thinking that breakfast for dinner was one of the best things ever, but it wasn't until I was a grown woman that she let the cat out of the bag that she would only fix it because it was super simple to make. I refused to learn how to cook while I was growing up, but she was who I ran to when I had the idea of impressing a man with my cooking. She taught me how to make her enchiladas and I do believe he was sufficiently impressed. There are so many food stories, but I’ll just say this last one. More often than not, I can remember her famous lasagna and cheesecake being requested for Cory’s birthday. I never understood why we didn’t have it more often until a couple years ago I asked her to teach me how to make it. I finally perfected it, but it’s only made on super special occasions because of how much effort goes into it. I didn’t know then to appreciate all her effort, but I sure learned.

She taught me other tricks too. She taught me how to be a classy lady, even if I don’t always follow the teachings. She said that no matter how I felt I should always get up fix my hair and put my make up on. She said taking care of myself would make me feel better. She taught me when applying mascara you wiggle the wand on your lashes and you don't pump the wand in the bottle since it allowed bacteria in. She knew putting your makeup on with a sponge was a good thing way before the beauty blender sponges were popular. She also taught me to always try on clothes and never trust the size. But also make sure to put all the clothes I wasn’t buying back on the hanger. It was just the polite thing to do.

She taught me it was OK to be myself, that I did not have to fit in if I didn’t want to. She taught me independence, although I think this may have backfired on her. Most of you have met me.

She taught me to be accepting of everyone. She not only took in the 4-legged strays, but also the 2-legged ones. Any of our friends were welcome under their roof, even if it was an extended stay.

She shared her love of animals with me. She was terrified of horses but was always out there with a treat for mine. She had a basset hound, Cleo, who was her best buddy for a very long time, but she took in many others. The first animals I can remember in my life were stays or rescues and there wasn’t a time in my life that I can remember being without a furry friend. Mom and Dad decided to make a little girl’s wish come true and bought me a pony. Little did we know he was the devil. The first time I was thrown from him was so traumatic. The stupid little pony took me for a run under a tree and I hit my head and fell off. It hurt something awful and I remember thinking to myself how could I get my parents outside to save me. I wasn’t but about fifty feet from the house, so I decided to scream bloody murder. It worked, they heard me. Both mom and dad come running outside and mom runs to me and scoops me up. Dad being dad runs to the horse and punches him in the nose. I don't know that anyone could have done anything to make me get up faster.

She taught me that at some point in a woman's life she will probably pee on herself when she runs. Ladies, if it hasn’t happened yet, just wait for it.

Growing up I always thought I had amazing taste in anything I showed her because she always responded so positively. She would say, “Oh yes that's beautiful!” or something of the like. As an adult and showing her different things when we went shopping, I couldn’t understand why now my taste was so awful. She had to tell me she wanted to build me up, to have my own opinions and to have courage sharing them. If you know me, you know I have no issues in that department. Maybe she did her job too well.

She would let her ironing pile up so she could watch a movie while working. I remember she would sometimes watch Stephen King’s The Stand. All, that was an 8 hour mini-series movie. She may not have made it through the whole movie, but she gave it a good try. Speaking of Stephen King, she passed on her love of books to me as well. I remember sneaking a book that she told me I wasn’t allowed to read when I was young, way too young. I should not have read that book, she was right, it was so terrifying and odd that I remember it to this day. When one of us did something stupid we would look at each other and quote from the movie It, “I worry about you Bevvie, I worry a lot,” and then laugh because we were so goofy.

There was a dinosaur park just outside of Eureka Springs. It's closed now but when I was growing up we used to go often. I remember going once with grandma and maybe Sally and Dakota. We got a bucket of chicken and some fixings and we had a picnic right out there by the dinosaurs. I sat on the brontosaurus’ tail with my chicken wing and had a grand time. There was a suspension bridge over a valley that she hated but I loved, so of course we would walk across it. Remember her teaching me independence?

I can't tell you how many times we went to the Gentry Safari Zoo. We would buy tons of bread to feed the animals in the drive though and then go play with the animals in the petting area. I think she was just as scared of the ostriches as I was. I continued the tradition with Baileigh and even Brayden.

We watched Arachnophobia in the theaters even though she was scared of spiders. At one point when a spider dropped down on the screen she screamed, jumped, and came back down with her nails in my arm and wouldn't let go of the entire movie. I’m pretty sure I still have a scar.

Mom was always terrified of electronics. She would not even go to the ATM and instead would have me go. Who in the world trusts a teenager with their PIN? For Christmas one year Cory and I decided to get her an iPad. I was already in Springfield and we wanted some way for her to stay connected with me and her newest grandson. We thought it would be great to be able to video chat with her whenever we wanted. It turns out it was just a very expense solitaire game. There was never any video chatting.

Of course, there were rough times too. When a girl becomes a teenager she becomes possessed by a demon. There was a lot of head butting through my teenage years and I’m pretty sure we didn't much like each other, but when I moved out we became best friends again. I'm sure there are some of you out there that can relate. I also think she was psychic. We called it her mommy seeing eye because no matter where I was it seemed like she always knew what I was doing. I found out later that she was just very good at putting the clues together and I generally dimed myself out in some way or another.

When it came time for me to learn to drive, mom tried her best. I’m pretty sure she only rode with me once though, but I don't blame her. I was very scary. There was a group of us going to Taco Tico and I remember changing lanes without even looking and almost side swiping a car. It was only about a 5 minute drive, but I remember she was not the adult who drove back with me. Dad became the parent with nerves of steel and taught me the ins and outs.

She always had time for anyone who needed her. Although in the later years you did have to choose your moments wisely because if you tried to talk to her during one of her shows you were hushed. Come commercial you had her full attention. She always knew what to say and was very often the sounding block for problems when I needed to talk through them. I can’t imagine the rest of my life without her support.

There are so many stories that we have with those we love. When we lose someone it is painful, but if we can remember them as they were and celebrate the life that they lived it may help the heartbreak just a little. We want to invite anyone who has a memory with mom to please step up and share.




Eulogy from Cory during the funeral service:

Opening
Good Morning family and friends. I am so grateful that this room is filled with so many people that knew and cared for my mom. Seeing the tremendous love and support for my mom and my family is humbling and inspiring. Thank you for taking the time today to be here. It means a lot to our family.
I’m not really known for my short talks or speeches. And this will absolutely be no different.

Mama’s boy
My mother gave birth to me in January of 1970 when she was barely 18 years old. In my early childhood I was raised primarily by my mother (but influenced strongly by my grandma, my big grandma and Bopo my great great grandma). Most of my early years and into my teenage years we had 5 generations alive and well, with me being the only boy. Needless to say, I was strongly influenced by women, I was and am the classic example of a Mama’s boy. I derived most of my values of the heart from these fine ladies and I’m forever grateful for this. As proud as mom was of me, she always left a little room to be more proud. I believe this was her way of instilling humility and pushing me to excel in life. She was always there to comfort me if I was hurt physically or emotionally but never let me use that as a crutch. She was an amazing nurturer not only to me but every kid (and girlfriend) I brought around.

Faith
My mother was a woman of faith and believed in the saving power of Jesus. I’m extremely grateful for this, I know she is now in heaven with her heart and soul full of joy. As I reflect back on my childhood, I can remember her always making sure I had good faith influences in my life. Now don’t get me wrong I was a handful and did not realize the impact it had on me until much later in life. Which I believe helped guide me to be the best man I can be today.

Mom
Mom and I endured a few challenges along the way but I always felt loved and never remember wanting for anything. I do remember wanting stuff I didn’t need but was corrected rather quickly. My Father and Mother were excellent providers, not only financially but emotionally as well. Mom gave me strength and taught me some of life’s most important lessons. And she did so in a unique but powerful way. Rarely, if ever did she preach a specific message or compel me to act in a certain manner. Rather, my mom inspired me and influenced me through her actions. With her words she was humble and caring, and her actions were bold and powerful.

Discipline
Mom taught me the power of discipline. I gave my mother more than her fair share of grief and she repaid me by using a big metal spatula on my ass. I used to think she had a 12-foot arm. She could swing that weapon from across the room and land it perfectly. Although my mom never had a career outside of the home, I can guarantee she had one of the toughest jobs being a homemaker and mother to this kid. I tended to buck the rules and thought I knew best. boy was I wrong (a couple of times). My poor sister never had a chance after all the crap I pulled. Dad and Moms favorite punishment was to ground me for like 3 months and I had to roof the house or paint the 20,000 sq foot barn. I swear that damn barn usually did not even need painting. I think they got a kick out of it but I was not amused at all. But as much as I hated it back then I now know It molded me into a better person that is self-disciplined and driven to accomplish my goals. My life is awesome today and I owe that to you Mom and you dad. Thank you.

Belief
My mom taught me the power of belief. By believing in me and the power of god, she cultivated the belief within me that I could do anything. That belief is powerful. Many of us struggle with this. We think we aren’t good enough or intelligent enough or skilled enough. We tell ourselves we can’t or are not capable of accomplishing our dreams. These thoughts are myths rooted in the lack of belief, and without belief we will not take action. We won’t take the necessary risks or leaps to achieve a truly fulfilling life. Fortunately, I had my mom. A strong woman that believed in me, her son. When I failed, she picked me up and sent me back in. When someone did me wrong, she would happily correct them, but when I did someone wrong, I would be the one corrected. With all of her actions she created the belief that drives me today. Believe in them and let them show you what they can accomplish.

Compassion
Another lesson my mom taught me was compassion. Now it wasn’t until I was well into adulthood that I even realized this. I can recall many times in my life I have not treated people with compassion and I have strived and struggled at times to change that. She listened without judgment. She gave without expectation. Growing up I can remember every morning before I woke, she was up cooking breakfast for us. This was always a freshly made breakfast with variety and not just cereal and milk. Same with dinner and lunch on the weekends. She gave to us unselfishly even when she didn’t feel well. She even showed this type of love with all the stray pets we had through the years. She was the best mother a son or dog could have. She was great with other kids, my friends. We were always the home to hang at or spend the night. My friends adored her and she made everyone feel welcome.

Dad
When my mother found my dad there was no Facebook or Match.com. They had to work hard at it, the old fashion way, by chasing a spouse down in their car. My mom found my dad when I was around the age of 5. I remember her telling me something like, she saw him at a stop light driving his blue Baja VW bug with his hippy hair (possibly embellished). She chased him down and I assume stalked him until he took her on a date. For her I believe it was love at first sight, at that light. The rest is history, because A short time later they were married and my Dad adopted me. I’m sure this altered my future in the very best way possible, as I could not have asked for a better life. All I know is she could not have made a better choice and I will be forever in her debt for this.

I have lost my wonderful mother, my companion, my mentor and friend. I am honored to have been her son. I am grieving for the amazing relationship and bond I had with her. I am grieving for my dad who lost his best friend and best wife he could have had. I am grieving for my sister and her family who lost her rock, her mentor, her mother and for the grandchildren who lost an amazing grandmother.

She taught us all what was really important in life – to love, support and care for family and friends in our lives. I know we are all better off for having known her and I consider it a privilege to be her son.

Thank you again for taking time to celebrate my mothers amazing life.





Memories of Cleo from Judy Smith Fletcher during the funeral service.

Several years ago, a friend who was a breeder of Bassett Hounds had a puppy that he couldn’t sell and gave it to us for free. The puppy had something wrong with her hips, but would make a great pet for us. We took her and named her Cleo. Our border collie did not like her and we were afraid that he was going to hurt her, so I asked Pam if she would like to have her. Of course, Pam said yes. She took her home to be her very own. Burley got home from work and found out that Pam had a new friend. He did not want Pam to have a dog so he didn’t like Cleo from the start and in the following days and weeks after much discussion; Pam decided to give her away. Pam being Pam with her love for her dog, grieved for Cleo. So Burley told her to go get Cleo. One little problem with that: the family who had Cleo didn’t want to give her back. Their little girl had fallen in love with her dog. Pam asked them if they would consider letting Cleo be her dog again if she could find their little girl another dog. They agreed to do just that. Pam called me and asked if I could find another puppy. We found a Bassett puppy for her and Pam had to pay for this pup and she took it home. The little girl was satisfied and Pam got Cleo back. Everyone was happy again….well except for Burley! Every time that I saw him, he always told me “I will never forgive you for giving Cleo to Pam! But, all’s well that ends well….when Pam’s disease got bad and she could no longer go on walks and hikes with Burley, he still had companionship with Cleo along. He finally did forgive me! Pam and I were very close when we were young and raising our children and I loved her very much. We didn’t speak as often in our later years, but I always knew she was there and that when I did call, we would talk for an hour or more. I will miss her, but I know that I will see her again in heaven.