Brian taught and coached my girls when they were in high school at SMH. My favorite picture ( although I have no idea where it is ) was of the seniors on the 1996 soccer team, all dressed up in their white graduation dresses, holding up their skirts to reveal their soccer cleats. They were gathered around in a semi-circle with Brian in the middle. Perfect. He was a large part of both my girls' high school experiences,  in the classroom, on the field and on the road for the many zone and SPC games.  Rest In Peace, Brian.
Barbara Sykes
mother of Taylor (1996) and Annie (2005)

From the San Antonio soccer community:  Brian was a long standing participant within the amateur leagues as a player, coach, organizer, supporter and friend to all. It is impossible to count how many lives he touched among the hundreds of men's, women's, and youth teams in our area. Respected by all for his fair play, love of the game, and concern for all of us. His joyfullness in sport and in all his life was an enduring example not to be forgotten. Cover back and go wide my friend.

So many great memories with Brian! 

- When I decluttered my classroom upon arrival, I contacted Brian and he made sure to get everything to the most sustainable options. This was a blessing. 
- Generously hosting the science department so we can make deeper connections with our colleagues. 
- There was a lightness and approachability to him that was refreshing.  Always willing to lend a helping hand.  For a while he processed the reimbursements for the department and did it with a smile. 
- One of my favorite memories was taking my middle school students on a nature walk with him. I noticed that two of my more squirrelly boys in the classroom turned into the two most engaged students on that walk. They were the ones who picked up the most trash - almost making a competition out of it. It was delightful to see that transformation. 

Thank you Brian for your love and legacy.

Most smh community members knew Brian as a beloved teacher, coach, colleague, and friend, and I knew him first as a parent of a student he mentored both in soccer and in the classroom, and also as an inspiring friend. My favorite Brian aspect was his love of the natural world. He not only was passionate about teaching and coaching his students, but ensuring they fully engaged in learning outside. His guided hikes on Salado Creek, student greenhouse operations, and the planting of their own work around the campus all speak volumes towards this. I worked with him on small parts of this as I too am a gardener; we traded cuttings of plants that I still have in my own garden and will try to always nurture in his memory. What a beautiful human. We are grateful to have known you.

Brian (Coach Kaestner) - touched so many lives during his 44 years at Saint Mary's Hall. He will forever be remembered by my family as my 2 sisters played soccer for him in the 1980's and I was blessed to call him my friend and college for 20 years.  The mark he made at SMH in the science and soccer world will live on and the stories we lived and tell will continue to be shared.  He will be greatly missed and my thoughts, prayers and love go out to Jane and Branden.

I was one of Brian's middle school students many years ago. I remember him as having a great sense of humor and being very passionate about the ecological well-being of the planet. 

I can only hope that Saint Mary's Hall and the students, faculty, and staff of past and present will be inspired by his life's work, and carry on the torch for all of our sake, and for the generations to come. 

Sending hugs to Brian's family and loved ones and honoring his life's wonderful, life-giving and life-protecting work. 

Warmly, Fox Convey (formerly known as Kady Monroe)

Mr. Kaestner was truly a one of one. Walking into class to be greeted by him was always such a delight and the positive vibes he radiated around campus were contagious. Mr. Kaestner was truly a good person who loved sharing his passion with students and colleagues, and he will be greatly missed, especially within the SMH community. It was an honor to be taught by Mr. Kaestner and I will be forever grateful for learning from such a great person. My thoughts and prayers are with Mr. Kaestner's loved ones.

So very sorry to learn of Brian's passing. One summer Brian's & I painted the SMH gymnasium. It was always fun working with him.
My deepest condolences to the family.

I can’t express in words how amazing he was. He was the best soccer coach I ever had. I loved his class and just being around him. A beautiful soul and aura. Thank you for enriching my life. He will be missed very much.

You were a force in Chloe’s life!
You were a wonderful soccer coach to her, but more importantly, a mentor, a role model and a true mensch:  a man of integrity, warmth and humor. 
  You valued all of your players as so much more than girls with soccer skills. You modeled how to love soccer, take it seriously, but to remember where it belonged in their lives, as they balanced so many competing, sometimes overwhelming demands.
  I know that Chloe wrote to you, and hoped you received it. I hope you knew how much you meant to so many of us.
Madeleine Reichert Zachary

It was a complete joy and surprise to be reunited with Mr. Kaestner a couple of years ago in Santa Fe, NM. My name is James Wood, I graduated from SMH in 2001 and had not seen Brian since. At the time I was working at the Randall Davey Audubon Center, a fitting place to have such a reunion. I was working outside in the gardens when I heard a familiar voice. I couldn't believe my eyes, there he was, 20 years later and nearly a thousand miles from San Antonio. He looked exactly the same :) Brian was searching for a place to entertain a group of AP Environmental Science teachers from the Southwest. I gladly offered our sanctuary, and the next day I found myself sharing the natural history of the area with him and his class. We took water samples in our historical Acequia. I'm so honored to have been with him once again. His compassion and positivity for sharing, learning, and being with the Earth has been part of me since I was young. I'm glad I was reminded of what I had learned from him. Thank you for everything Mr. Kaestner, I hope you enjoy exploring the universe. Love and Kindness, James.

A friend asked me the other day: what was your favorite Brian Kaestner memory. I have to say  that my favorite memory was in my 2nd year back at SMH, I blew out my knee playing dodgeball with the middle school teachers. It was a painful accident, and I had to wait weeks to have surgery. He nearly immediately asked what he could do to help, and I think he may have come over to mow the lawn at least once during that time. Rachel remembers him going to Home Depot to get a light bulb and wound up changing it for her as soon as he got back. 

Where he really helped us was after the surgery and when I returned to SMH. He and Brendan, then in lower school, carried me in the back of his old Xterra for nearly 6 weeks while I had a cast on my leg to immobilize my knee after surgery. I think he even took me to a couple of Friday after school appointments to have my cast changed as my leg atrophied and my knee started moving too much. Once I started driving again, I was so thankful to him for all the kindness, effort and care he gave us. I think I tried to pay him back in coffee but you could never repay kindness like that.

Brian, you will be missed so much by me and my family. You were a great guy, a great teacher and most of all, a great friend!

Jane, Branden and family,
It is with a heavy heart that I send condolences to you all. Brian was a valued friend and colleague. He came to every Upper School chapel service and was always the first to volunteer to help with anything. The day he spoke to the students about his call to the vocation of teaching and his young start as an environmentalist was one of the best talks we ever had. His help as a student mentor when we started the Duke of Edinburgh program enabled young people to reach their goals and was no small part of our success. Brian was an inspiration to his coworkers and our students. He taught me a great deal about values and spirituality. I shall miss our talks. Sending love and comfort to you in this sorrowful time.
Sincerely,
Chap Sue

My favorite teacher at SMH, a true legend. He was always smiling, always excited and was easily convinced to have outdoor classes (we may have had more classes outdoors than indoors). It was awesome being able to visit with him these past few years to talk through various projects. You will be deeply missed!

Dear Jane and Branden,
I can not imagine how heartbroken you must feel.  Everyone who knew your family mourns with you.  I hope you feel the love and healing sent your way from those who benefited from knowing Brian.  You are in my prayers.  He will be greatly missed.
Deb DeVeau

Brian and I both had a passion for planting oak trees. He is a legend, a friend, a coach and mostly he is good man. He showed at my doorstep with all his wheeled gear, like the walker, chair, etc when my father was having surgery. The most selfless man who dedicated his life to soccer, science and smh. Miss you dude.

I played on the Upper School women’s soccer in ‘84 and ‘85. Mr. Kaestner made an incredible impact on my time at SMH. He was one of the best coaches I had the pleasure to work with and being from outside Texas, he always made me feel included and very much seen. I am very sad to hear of his passing and my heart is with his family at this difficult time. 
Betsy Fernald Garcia
SMH ‘85

He will truly be missed by many I remember my time working at SMH he was always a joy to be around I will never forget him especially when I needed a good laugh sincerely Mr frank from sage dining

Brian was my good friend and colleague for 28 years at SMH. He will be missed by all his students and faculty at the school. My condolences to the family.

OBITUARY

Brian Guy Kaestner

April 5, 1955 – April 8, 2025

Porter Loring Mortuary - North

Show your support

Add a Memory

Share Obituary

Get Reminders

Services