Helen Frances Zwernemann Aude

My mother, Helen Frances Zwernemann Aude, born July 13, 1935, died on February 22, 2017, after living with Alzheimer's for more than 10 years. Helen was born in Seguin, Texas and married Harvey H. Aude in 1953 at the tender age of 17. Her life growing up was tough. She was the youngest child, and her mother and father divorced after her sister and brother left home, leaving Helen and her mother to figure out how to support themselves when women seldom worked outside the home. They were strong women. Laverne, Helen's mother, went to work, but with little education and no work experience, she could not make ends meet. Helen, just 14, dropped out of school and went to work. She worked at a soda fountain and then as a telephone operator.

She was living in New Braunfels when she met my father, a military man. Soon after they were married, off they went to their first assignment in Fort Worth. Helen became pregnant and lost her first child through miscarriage. She soon was pregnant with her daughter Gayna. Two years later, her son Steven was born. The family then packed their bags and moved to Illinois, and then to Oklahoma, where in 1963, her son Daniel was born. The family began their military wanderings through California, Texas, New Jersey, and England. At Helen's insistence, the family settled in San Antonio, Texas. During all of the years Dad was in the military, Mom was a stay at home traditional mom, cooking, cleaning, and raising children. She was determined to finish her high school diploma so she took classes and finished her schooling by mail. It was a proud moment for my mother. During the 70's, women's liberation embraced Mom, as it did so many women with limited choices. She went to work, and boy, Dad was mad! She was determined however, and in the end, Dad lost out, and accepted that his wife was his equal and always remained his superior in cooking skill!

Helen retired after a career in Civil Service and she and Dad traveled to various locations that they enjoyed immensely. Helen loved to go to Las Vegas, but she was a stingy gambler and never lost more than $50. They loved a trip they took with their son Daniel and his wife to Europe as well as the Olympics in Atlanta in 1996. Helen had many friends from childhood, military travels, work and neighbors and visited them whenever she could, sometimes with the camper (which she hated). She was a well-loved and devoted friend.

In 1991, the family was struck with tragedy and lost Steven to drugs. Helen was strong and courageous throughout and did all she could to take care of the beautiful son, Jeremy, that Steve left behind. Helen was a spiritual person and found strength and encouragement in the belief that she would once again be reunited with her son and other loved ones.

At 71, Helen began in her journey with Alzheimer's disease. She did not reveal that she had it although she must surely have known since her father had died of the disease just six weeks after losing her son. She tried to carry on as normally as possible, and when that was no longer possible, Dad took over and began cooking, cleaning, and caring for Mom so that they could continue to be together. After Dad died in 2010, Mom came to live with me, and then moved to Brookdale Shavano Park where she lived for another four years until her death.

In all the time that Mom was sick, she never pitied herself or acted in any manner but accepting and cheerful. She was dignified and calm and pleasant to be around until the very end of her life. Mom had tremendous courage to wait out this dreadful disease with dignity and strength. I am lucky to have been able to be with her during this time as she said her "long goodbye". I will never forget my mother's courage, dignity, and continual cheerfulness during this time and I hope you will remember that about her too.

Helen was preceded in death by her mother, father, sister, and brother; her husband, Harvey; and beloved son, Steven. She leaves behind her daughter, Gayna and husband Ed Dupont; son, Daniel and wife Tawanna Aude; her loves and darling grandsons, Jeremy Aude and husband Wayne Haughn, Joey Dupont, Timmy Dupont, and Seth Aude; her step sister Linda Craig who she dearly loved; as well as many other friends and extended family.

I will be forever indebted to the many people who are neither recognized nor paid enough as caregivers to those who suffer from Alzheimer's and dementia. The people who took care of Mom at Brookdale Shavano Park were loving, kind, and compassionate every single day. Helen was fortunate to live among angels her last years of life and Helen's family thanks you all from the bottom of our hearts.

The family will receive friends from 1:00 to 2:00 p.m., Monday, February 27, 2017, at Porter Loring Mortuary North.

SERVICE

MONDAY

FEBRUARY 27, 2017

2:00 P.M.

PORTER LORING NORTH CHAPEL

Private interment will be held in Fort Sam Houston National Cemetery at a later date.