Muy Hong

80 years ago, my mother was born in Guandong, Zhongshan, Cheung-Jao. She was the 2nd youngest of 7 children.

I remember asking my mother about her life and she started by saying this: ‘As far back as I can remember, I have always worked’. There was never time to play or go to school.

She had to clean the house and cook for her family - often while taking care of her baby sister. The rest of the time, she spent working in the fields of the family’s farm.

She was just a young girl when war broke out. Her village was invaded, and she often had to hide from soldiers and bombs. People around her were dying of starvation. But no matter how little she had, Mom would always make sure that others were fed. She’d line up to get food offered by the Red Cross, but gave it away to her friend. Her father often scolded her for doing that.

After the war ended, Mom continued to care for the family. Then, when she was 18, she met and married my father, who had just returned from Cuba and was looking for a bride.

This was a happy time for my parents. They were newly married and expecting their first child, but that peaceful time was short-lived because of the revolution in China. The following year, my father decided to go back to Cuba, to work, save and then return to China to be with his family - but he wasn’t able to return.

Meanwhile, Mom was left to take care of the baby by herself. This was my sister Sau Ling.

Mom was determined to get her family together. With no news of my father, she decided to take action herself, and after 5 years, found a way to leave China to join him again. But it was under one condition - she would have to come alone and leave her daughter behind.

Leaving Ling was the hardest decision that Mom had ever had to make. She promised herself that once settled in Cuba, she would send for her.

In 1954, she joined my father, in a new country and a new culture. Mom worked in their small produce store where she learned to speak Spanish by speaking with the customers. Within a year, my sister Vio and I were born.

Soon, there was political unrest in Cuba and Mom was worried about her family’s safety once again. She was not able to bring Ling from China.

By 1962, after many months of trying, she was finally able to get exit passes to America. But again there was one condition – only her daughters could leave, and she and my father would have to stay behind. So Vio and I went to a new country by ourselves - all alone. We were 7 years old.

Things got worse for my parents after we left Cuba. Food was scarce, their store was forced to be shut down, my father taken away for work labor, and there was fear of war. With hardly anything left, Mom knitted socks for people in exchange for rice to eat.

Several years later, Mom was finally allowed to leave for America but my father was forced to stay behind. She didn’t want to leave him but he persuaded her that it was the best thing to do. So in 1966, she left for America.

It had been 4 years since Mom had seen us, and 9 years since she had seen Ling. We could not speak with Mom. She did not speak English, and Vio and I did not speak Chinese. Again, she had to learn the customs of her new country.

We moved to San Francisco with the help of an uncle and a few months later, my father was finally able to leave Cuba. My father – mi Papa - lived with us for a short time, until his death 5 years later.

Mom then raised Vio and me by herself. Several years later, she met and married Tommy Hong. Her life was once again filled with happiness, especially as her new extended family now included Tommy’s children - Jack, Jean and Jane.

Around this time, Mom started the paper work to bring Ling over. It took about 10 years to get everything approved. By this time, Ling already had a family of her own and in 1984, they all came to America.

Mom was ever so happy, so ecstatic! At long last, her dream was fulfilled. She was with all of her children for the first time.

It took her 35 years to reunite her family.

With her first great granddaughter, Isabella born one year ago, her life was completed.