OBITUARY
Brian John Lilly Jr.
April 12, 2001 – January 4, 2021
Brian John Lilly, Jr., 19, of Scarsdale, NY met our Heavenly Father on January 4, 2021. Brian was born in New York, NY on April 12, 2001. A voracious student of life, Brian was an accomplished athlete, creative and big picture thinker. He was a loving and admired son, brother, grandson, nephew, cousin, friend and teammate. Brian graduated from Scarsdale High School in 2019, where he was the single recipient of the Henry David Thoreau award, given to a student who marches to the beat of their own drum. He overcame Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis (JRA) through a love of sports and competition. He adored nature and being outside in all kinds of weather. He loved skiing with his family, with favorite ski trips to Heavenly in Lake Tahoe, CA. Brian was a passionate rower in high school for the Pelham Community Rowing Association (PCRA). He was named the Most Improved as a junior and served as a team captain as a Senior. He earned a bronze medal at the Philly Youth regatta in the 8+ in 2018. He ran and finished the New York City Marathon in 2018 for the Arthritis Foundation Team. Brian proudly competed and finished the Ironman Lake Placid triathalon competition in 2019, requiring a 2.4 mile swim (3.9K), 112 mile bike (180.2K), and 26.2 mile marathon run (42.2K), widely considered one of the most difficult one-day sporting events in the world. As a D1 athlete, he was a member of the UC San Diego Men's Rowing Class of 2023. He helped the UCSD C boat to a 10th place finish of 21 crews in the Men’s Open 8+ at the 2019 San Diego Fall Classic Regatta. Brian was pursuing a BS in Real Estate and Development at UCSD. He worked summers in construction and interned in corporate sustainability management. He loved creating art and fashion design and was the founder of a mens streetwear brand, Pyrony. Brian learned to silkscreen the brand apparel until he found a production company for outsourcing so he could focus on his studies. Brian is survived by his parents, Brian Sr and Brenda (Hawthorne) Lilly, sister Virginia Lilly, grandparents Patricia Corrigan Lilly, Charles Hawthorne, Mary Peters Hawthorne, paternal uncles; Kevin (Debbie) Lilly, Michael (Michele) Lilly, Sean Lilly, Patrick Lilly, Brenden Lilly, Paddy (Pat) Lilly; maternal uncles and aunts; Stephen (Amanda) Hawthorne, Susan (Steven) Lawrence, Donna (Tim) Jackson, Raymond Peters, Carolyn (Allen) Rogers and many loving first and second cousins. Visitation hours: Thursday, January 14 & Friday, January 15 2021 4:00 pm to 8:00 pm Edwin L. Bennett Funeral Home 824 Scarsdale Avenue Scarsdale, NY Mass of Christian Burial for immediate family Saturday, January 16, 2021 10:00 am at IHM Catholic Church 8 Carman Road Scarsdale, NY. Mass will also be livestreamed from IHM Scarsdale website: • Funeral Mass Live Stream Link Private Burial to immediately follow Mass. In Lieu of flowers, please give to: • Pelham Community Rowing Association PCRA is a non-profit 501(c)(3) organization led by a volunteer board. 100% of all fees collected by PCRA are committed to maintaining and enhancing the program. PCRA offers need-based financial assistance to committed participants. https://gofund.me/316624d7
• Vibrant Emotional Health Vibrant Emotional Health helps people achieve mental and emotional wellbeing with dignity and respect. Formerly the Mental Health Association of New York City (MHA-NYC), Vibrant Emotional Health’s groundbreaking solutions have delivered high quality services and support, when, where and how people need it for over 50 years. Through our state-of-the-art technology-enabled services, community wellness programs, and advocacy and education work, we are building a society in which emotional wellness can be a reality for everyone.
Please add special photo memories and short videos for a memorial slide show at visitation https://www.mem.com/memorysharing/0f4d6e56-805a-46dc-a84d-ea35ceea01d4?lang=en
Services
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Visitation
Thursday, January 14, 2021
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Visitation
Friday, January 15, 2021
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Mass of Christian Burial
Saturday, January 16, 2021
Memories
Brian John Lilly Jr.
have a memory or condolence to add?
ADD A MEMORYOren Iosepovici
January 17, 2021
It was my honor to have served as Brian’s Dean at Scarsdale High School. He was as genuine a person as I had met, and someone who I could always count on to do and say the right things. That was true when he was a student, and equally so when we asked him to speak as an alumni at our Senior Transition Day this past spring. I still remember being in awe of his accomplishments as a senior - marathon runner, crew recruit, and most incredibly an Iron Man Triathlete. I shared that last piece with friends at the time, as I was amazed by what he had accomplished. To Virginia, Brenda, and Brian Sr. - My deepest condolences, and know that the entire Scarsdale High School community mourns with you.
Amanda Hawthorne
January 17, 2021
Brian's life has touched so many. He is a part of each of those he has interacted with and with that he continues to touch others. It's like a ripple in the water where Brian is the pebble that sets it off.
I had the privilege to be chosen as his aunt for 9 short years. I remember meeting this sweet, full faced, yes ma’aming boy for the first time. He had a way of just pulling you in to his beautiful view of the world. Fast forward to tracking him online for the marathon and then the iron man. I was so proud of him. I was so in awe of his ability to set goals and stick-to-it-ness. Discipline of that nature is admirable.
God is holding Brian and he hears our hearts’ cries as we greave our loss. God continues to use Brian to share his story of love.
All my love – Amanda
Peter and Jennifer Godshall
January 16, 2021
Our families became close as a result of meeting through Edgewood School. Regardless of what it was that we were doing together, school fund raisers / sports / Cub Scouts / trips to Disney / etc, Brian always brought an incredible energy. The combination of his gentle personality, razor sharp wit, and unmatched sense of humor created a personality that simply lit up every room he entered. We are all better for having known Brian and can smile while reminiscing about good times, even as we are left with a gaping hole in our hearts. We love you and know that, by now you've got a circle of angels around you and you are making them laugh.
Kimberly Greene Family
January 16, 2021
Brian and my son Elliott laughed together and danced together during Mr Noble's SHS band class and before concert performances. A memory to embrace. Sending healing prayers, warmth, and thoughts from our family to your family.
~Kimberly, Elliott, and Isaak
Lauren Lilly
January 15, 2021
More happy memories
Nathan Yoder
January 15, 2021
I was a fellow student athlete with Brian at UCSD and every moment I got to share with him I cherish now. It's hard to put into words exactly what his friendship meant to me, but every interaction with Brian would make my day better. Seeing him even for a few seconds in between classes would be a genuine treat that I would think about for the rest of my day. I wish I could have more of those interactions in my life, but I know Brian has left a legacy on my life that I'll never forget and I thank him for that.
Lauren Lilly
January 15, 2021
Baby Brian Jr.
Devin and Lauren Lilly
January 15, 2021
We love you Brian Jr.
Nancy Riina
January 15, 2021
Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Brian Jr. will always be remembered with so much love, may he Rest In Peace. Sending lots of love and hugs.♥️
Jason Noble
January 15, 2021
I was honored to teach Brian in the Scarsdale High School Band program during his four years with us at Scarsdale High. He was an immensely talented percussionist and an incredible person in every way: soft-spoken, a heart of gold, and a willingness to mentor each incoming class of new musicians without any hesitation. He leaves behind a legacy of kindness, warmth, and authenticity. My deepest sympathies to the entire family during this immense time of loss. May his memory be a blessing.
Doug Vermes
January 15, 2021
I was fortunate to have the opportunity to teach Brian in my Introduction to Computer Science class when he was a junior in high school. I remember Brian was upbeat and got along very well with everyone else in the class. Though the class only lasted for one semester, Brian's enthusiasm added so much to our class. My sincerest condolences to Brian's family.
Carol D'Angelo
January 15, 2021
I was blessed to have Brian in my Spanish class for two years at SHS. He brought joy and laughter to the classroom everyday. As Advisors to the Senior Class, it was an honor for Mr. Egan and myself to present him with the Henry David Thoreau Award on Graduation Day. He was the perfect recipient and I was thrilled that his peers recognized how special he was. It highlighted his ability to be an individual. Brian was a gift to all of us.
My thoughts and prayers are with all of you!
With love,
Carol D'Angelo
The Newman Family
January 14, 2021
Brenda, Brian and Virginia
We have so many happy memories of Brian and the our kids running all over the Wood together. The Lilly’s, Lamberts, and Johanssen gang had so much fun. So many birthday parties and summer evenings filled with Brian’s smiles and laughing. My favorite memories is of us parents taking the kids around Trick or Treating on Halloween. Brian will be missed dearly and always remembered fondly.
With Love,
Cindy Steve Jackie Rebecca and Jacob
Carly Kessler
January 14, 2021
Although I was never close with Brian, he was someone I’d always admired since middle school. From grade 6 and onward, I knew him as the friendly, industrious, and bright kid who could get along with anyone.
I remember when Brian received the Thoreau award, upon which I thought, what a fitting recognition for someone so worthy of it. There’s a lot to say about being authentically yourself, and Brian never failed to do just that. That inimitability, coupled with his relentless kindness, are qualities that will inspire me going forward.
Brian will be remembered and missed as someone who touched the lives of many, whether directly or indirectly. I can say with certainty that he made Scarsdale a better place just by being himself.
To the Lillys—no words can describe the tremendous lament I feel for you. Sending love
Angie Gottlieb
January 14, 2021
Brian must have been around 7 or 8 years old in this picture. This was taken at my rehearsal dinner in 2009. I babysat for Brian and his family and I have such fond memories of Brian and his sweet beautiful family! He was the smartest and cutest little boy. We had so much fun going to the park, the library, playing, making arts and crafts and more. Brian will be greatly missed. I am so heartbroken to hear of his passing. May he Rest in Eternal Peace. My thoughts and prayers go out to all of you during this incredibly difficult time. Sending you all a hug. ❤️
Nola Riina
January 13, 2021
I am so thankful for the time I got with Brian. Although it was short, I’m so glad to have gotten the opportunity to get to know such a wonderful person. I met Brian when he joined PCRA. Gradually, we bonded during our daily commute to Glenn Island. The Scarsdale community on the team was small, but we stuck together during away races and team dinners.
I could always count on Brian to brighten my day. Whenever workouts got tough, I could always rely on him to share a funny joke or a laugh. His mere presence was enough to put a smile on anyone’s face.
Brian will not be forgotten. May his memory live on.
Hallie Sheinbaum
January 13, 2021
Brian was the kindest, funniest, and most determined friend. The first thing I could not help but notice about Brian when I first met him in 6th grade was his quirky laugh that was beyond contagious. His sense of humor and smile were priceless. Brian’s presence was one that always radiated light and happiness. Brian truly cared about his friends and always had our back. Brian was the only guy to ask me every single time I was with him, “So Hallie, how are you really?” and genuinely wanted to know. Brian was the most caring friend that I could have asked for, and I will forever cherish the time I got to spend with him.
To Brenda, Brian, and Virginia- There are no words to express my sorrow. Please know that my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Brian will never be forgotten.
Katie Karp
January 13, 2021
There are so many wonderful things that come to mind when thinking of Brian. Whether it be his ceaseless determination, his genuine curiosity for the world and the people around him, or his true artistic talent, Brian continually impressed and inspired me to become a better version of myself. I can’t help but note Brian’s contagious laugh and smile that are in many ways reflective of the true source of light and joy that he was and will forever be to anyone who was lucky enough to meet him. I am so grateful to have had a truly extraordinary friend like Brian and know that he will live on through his widespread but still profound touch on this Earth.
Forever and ever, Brian.
To the Lilly’s, I am always in your corner spreading love.
Mao Fukada
January 13, 2021
I first met Brian our Sophomore year at Scarsdale High School, it was not until our Junior year when we started to spend more time together. He never failed to make you smile and laugh until you were crying. He always had my back when things got rough, and I’ll always remember his genuine care and kindness. Although we were only friends for a short amount of time, it felt like we had known each other for longer. You will always be in my heart. Until we meet again, Brian.
Jenna Riina
January 13, 2021
I will never forget the wonderful times and memories I was fortunate enough to have with Brian. I met Brian my sophomore year of high school at the tryouts for the rowing team. From that moment on I would look forward to the time we would spend together during practices, bus rides, and regattas. He always knew the right things to say and would alway bring such a wonderful positive energy to practice. Brian was one of the few people I felt I could go to about anything no matter how ridiculous. He was a wonderful friend to have and I will miss him dearly, but my memories of him will last forever.
Elise Pailthorpe
January 12, 2021
Brenda,
My deepest condolences. I love you dearly.
Aaron Aboodi
January 12, 2021
Where do you begin when talking about Brian Lilly? Is it the numerous amount of times where he was expected to fail and proved the world wrong? How about his unique ability to put a smile on your face, even when there was nothing to smile about? Do you start talking about how not only was he the best friend someone could ask for, but even a better person?
I met Brian when I was in 6th grade at Scarsdale Middle School. We were in social studies and English together. To be perfectly honest, it wasn’t a relationship where we immediately connected, it was something that grew gradually over the period of time. Brian was a unique friend to me as many of my other friends had played and watched sports. That wasn’t Brian. He had other interests and talents such as fashion, photography, and music. Brian was one of the only people I could sit in an empty room with and just talk. He had the ability to listen to what you were saying and make something out of it. He was constantly thinking of how he could make the world a better place, and that, I believe he did.
Brian Lilly taught me to have no fears of failure. He taught me to challenge myself and accept obstacles thrown my way. He taught me to embrace life and be in the moment.
I love Brian, I always will.
I am fortunate to have had such a special relationship with an even more special person.
His name will never be forgotten.
Evan Huo
January 12, 2021
I first met Brian in 6th-grade classes. In middle school, we would create music videos for class projects and outside of school, we would travel to basketball tournaments and bar mitzvahs. Throughout the years of our friendship, Brian showed me what extraordinary friendship and character could look like. Despite his comfort level and how daunting the task may have been, Brian never failed to seize an opportunity or try something new. No matter what he did, Brian approached every new endeavor with determination, resilience, and a strong work ethic.
Many friends come and go, but Brian stuck by my side throughout the ups and downs and I will never forget all he has done for me and the memories we have created. I will always be proud that I was able to consider him one of my closest friends.
carolyn rogers
January 11, 2021
Brenda, Brian and Virginia,
Remembering all the wonderful Christmas Eve celebrations and swim get togethers at our home in Fairfield CT. Also, many fun times at your home in Scarsdale.
Such a great family.
Rest in peace dear Brian, Jr., we love you dearly.
Aunt Carolyn and Uncle Allen.
Max Brody
January 11, 2021
Brian was the best friend I could ask for. He was always looking out for others and putting his friends’ needs above his own. I have never met someone who was more confident yet humble than Brian. He had an incredible ability to stay true to himself and achieve his goals, whether it be on the dance floor or the rowing erg. I will forever cherish the time I spent with him.
Lisa McIver
January 10, 2021
Dear Brenda, Brian and Virginia,
There are no words to express our sorrow. Brian will always be remembered for his strength, determination and his leadership. His beautiful kind smile will live on forever in our memories. Know that your PCRA family is with you. Please lean on us for whatever we can do for you and your family.
Our deepest condolences,
The McIver Family
Julia Denion
January 10, 2021
I met Brian through St. Pius during CCD. I always remembered how funny and kind he was. Years later we were in some of the same classes and he would always make everyone laugh and smile with his amazing sense of humor. Sending prayers your way during this unimaginably difficult time. I am so sorry for your loss.
Lisa Ferris
January 9, 2021
May our Lord bless and comfort you and your family during this time of grief. Please accept my deepest sympathies.
I met Brian at our church in sixth grade and I was lucky enough to share classes with him throughout our time at Scarsdale. Brian was a kind, intelligent, and truly amazing young man who was well-liked and admired in our grade. Since middle school, he managed to light up the room with his good-nature and extraordinary sense of humor. Brian was so so special - he will never be forgotten as his spirit will live on in all those who knew him.
Jennifer Upton
January 8, 2021
Dear Brenda,
We were boats passing at PCRA, and I never really got to know Brian, beyond the joy and pride he brought to you. Your face lit up when you talked of him. My heart goes out to all your family. May Brian's memory be a blessing.
Jennifer Upton
Kristen Timmermans
January 8, 2021
Dear Brenda, Brian and Virigina:
Our hearts are so heavy. Brian will live on in our hearts and in the hearts of everyone who were lucky enough to know him. He was a leader and an inspiration for everyone at PCRA. Our rowing community has lost a bright light. God bless Brian and your family.
Love,
The Timmermans Family
Barbara Anderson Graham
January 8, 2021
Brenda, Brian and Virginia, we offer you our sincerest condolences. We are thinking of you and praying for you. We have the fondest memories of Brian. Scott remembers coaching him and remarked on his kindness and sportsmanship. He was a wonderful friend to Robert in the early Edgewood days and someone we all remember with affection.
Nancy Denion
January 7, 2021
Our deepest condolences to your family. We have very fond memories of Brian during our time at St Pius. Please know that our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
Elisabeth Brew
January 7, 2021
Holding you in our thoughts and prayers. Our deepest condolences.
The Brew Family
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Brian’s first rowing experience.
Good form!
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Brian with PCRA
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PCRA
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Summer 2018 PCRA
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Brian and Reid
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Ergathon PCRA
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Regatta PCRA
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How short is Allen?
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Pals
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Bring on the chow
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Hurry up Brian
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One of many Christmas Eve parties and treasure hunt
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12 miles into the NYC marathon
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Brian on his 112 mile bike ride
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Ironman Marathon
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yoga
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Ironman finish line
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After the 2.4 mile swim
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RIP Brian ❤️
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the unforgettable day at the beach with brian
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the unforgettable day at the beach with brian
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the unforgettable day at the beach with brian
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the unforgettable day at the beach with brian
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the unforgettable day at the beach with brian
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the unforgettable day at the beach with brian
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the unforgettable day at the beach with brian
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the unforgettable day at the beach with brian
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the unforgettable day at the beach with brian
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the most productive and unproductive team study hours
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the last bonfire of the season with the seniors
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nature knows no kings
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nature knows no kings
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make sure you dress fancy for dinner tonight
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make sure you dress fancy for dinner tonight
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weekend post-row recovery
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acapella trip went right
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fall classic racing with brian
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study encouragement
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fall classic racing with brian
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valentines bachelor
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fall classic racing
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beach day
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baywatch
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beach day
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quality you can taste
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tritons up
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nature knows no kings
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tritons up
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One of my best memories at UCSD was when Brian and I would cycle down to Mission Bay before Saturday practice. We would meet just after 5 am in Sixth college and barrel down the La Jolla bluffs in pitch black to make it to the boathouse before practice started. I have a distinct memory of stopping with him on the way back one morning and him telling me that this sort of activity was just what he absolutely loved to do. Brian was actually the one to inspire me to buy that triathlon bike and I'm forever glad I did and have so many great memories with him.
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Brian’s first rowing experience.
Good form!
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Brian with PCRA
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PCRA
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Summer 2018 PCRA
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Brian and Reid
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Ergathon PCRA
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Regatta PCRA
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How short is Allen?
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Pals
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Bring on the chow
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Hurry up Brian
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One of many Christmas Eve parties and treasure hunt
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12 miles into the NYC marathon
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Brian on his 112 mile bike ride
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Ironman Marathon
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yoga
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Ironman finish line
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After the 2.4 mile swim
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RIP Brian ❤️
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the unforgettable day at the beach with brian
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the unforgettable day at the beach with brian
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the unforgettable day at the beach with brian
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the unforgettable day at the beach with brian
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the unforgettable day at the beach with brian
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the unforgettable day at the beach with brian
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the unforgettable day at the beach with brian
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the unforgettable day at the beach with brian
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the unforgettable day at the beach with brian
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the unforgettable day at the beach with brian
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the unforgettable day at the beach with brian
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the most productive and unproductive team study hours
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the last bonfire of the season with the seniors
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nature knows no kings
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nature knows no kings
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make sure you dress fancy for dinner tonight
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make sure you dress fancy for dinner tonight
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weekend post-row recovery
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nature knows no kings
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acapella trip went right
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fall classic racing with brian
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study encouragement
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fall classic racing with brian
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valentines bachelor
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fall classic racing
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beach day
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baywatch
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beach day
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the most unproductive and productive team study hours
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nature knows no kings
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quality you can taste
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tritons up
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nature knows no kings
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tritons up
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One of my best memories at UCSD was when Brian and I would cycle down to Mission Bay before Saturday practice. We would meet just after 5 am in Sixth college and barrel down the La Jolla bluffs in pitch black to make it to the boathouse before practice started. I have a distinct memory of stopping with him on the way back one morning and him telling me that this sort of activity was just what he absolutely loved to do. Brian was actually the one to inspire me to buy that triathlon bike and I'm forever glad I did and have so many great memories with him.