Dela Van Hoy was born Adelia Mae Nesset, in Bellingham, WA on June 5, 1925, to parents Esther Helene Hillard and Ole Aadne Nesset. She was named for her mother's cousin who was a missionary to China. Dela joined older sister Irene and brother Orren 'Bud', who at age two called her 'Dela' because he couldn't pronounce 'Adelia.' The name stuck.
Dela's father and all her grandparents (Aadne and Ingeborg Nesset, and Ole and Inga Strand Hillard) immigrated from Norway and eventually all settled in the Nooksack River Valley in Deming and Saxon. Dela grew up in Lawrence in the farmland of that beautiful valley, nestled amid Mt. Baker, Mt. Shuksan, and the Twin Sisters; surrounded by grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins.
Dela was baptized on July 26, 1925. Faith and church were at the center of her family life. She remembered that as a child she would get on her knees to pump the organ for her mother at Sunday worship. Sunday was the best day of the week. After church the extended family gathered at Esther's parents for dinner where they played croquet and baseball outdoors, and then played games indoors and gathered around the organ to sing. "No television in those days," as she was fond of reminding us.
The Nesset family lived in a three room home built on eight acres by her father Ole - just across the creek from her aunt, uncle and cousins - which made for all kinds of fun. At home they raised chickens and shipped eggs. They grew tomatoes to sell and all their own vegetables to eat. They also had a cow and one of Dela's jobs was to churn butter. Her father Ole worked as a logger and stayed at the camp in the woods all week. Dela could hardly wait until he came home for the weekends when he would climb in bed with the kids and tell them stories about Norway and trolls and all sorts of adventures.
Dela had a special relationship with her grandmother Inga Hillard who lived just a quarter mile away. She remembered working and baking together and long talks. She attributed her love of flowers to the many wildflowers that grew on the hill behind the farm--wild roses, Indian Paint Brushes, violets, tiger lilies, trillium and Johnny Jump Ups. When asked as a young girl what she wanted to be when she grew up, her answer was always the same--"a grandmother".
When Dela was nine years old, her life changed dramatically. Her father was killed in a logging accident, and the family was left without much support. Later that year after her sister Irene graduated high school and left for nurses training in Seattle, the family moved to her grandparents Hillard for mutual support where they helped to run the farm. Everyday Dela helped her grandma Inga pack the eggs for shipping from thousands of chickens. One of the most cherished parts of living with her grandparents was seeing and being a part of their prayer life. She said that began her strong belief in prayer and the action of the Holy Spirit. It's so very fitting that we are gathering for her memorial on Pentecost Sunday. In 1939 after her grandparents died, the family moved back to their family home and Dela's mother went to work 20 miles away, only able to come home on the weekends. Bud and Dela were on their own during the week with; Aunt Myrtle and Uncle Jens keeping an eye on them from across the creek.
Dela loved school and was very active in high school government, music and sports. She played flute and piccolo in the band, sang in the choir, and lettered in baseball and speed ball. She graduated from Mount Baker High School at age 15 as Salutatorian (second) of her class. Because her older sister had become ill with TB and died just before her senior year, Dela did not go on to college as she had hoped. After four family deaths in six years, she and her mom needed each other. They got an apartment together in Bellingham where Dela went to business school and found a job at Bellingham Iron Works as Payroll Clerk. She had to get a work permit because she was only 16.
WWII was expanding to the Pacific and in need of medical personnel, so at age 17 ½ Dela joined the Army Medical Corps, entering nine months of training in Lab Tech School. Her mother Esther decided to join her, and after training they were assigned together to Fitzsimmons Hospital in Denver, Colorado. The family story tells that when they joined up, Dela was too young and Esther was too old, and they both had to "fib" about their age. Brother Bud was already in the Army Corps of Engineers, so the Bellingham Herald featured a photo and story of mother, son and daughter all serving together in the army.
Just before joining the army, Dela's girlfriend Bobby introduced her to a cousin-- Bill Van Hoy. Three weeks later Bill left for Navy training and service, and was stationed in the Pacific as an electronics technician. They wrote letters for three years and the rest is history. When the war was over Bill came immediately to Denver and proposed. Dela said, "He had to wait for me from October to June when my time was up in Denver." Dela and Bill were married on June 5, 1946 in Bellingham, Washington. She kept those precious love letters for 75 years.
Their first home was an apartment in the Wallingford district of Seattle, where Susan Irene was born June 13, 1947; joined by Gary William on March 31, 1949. Six months later they found the perfect two bedroom house in Lake Forest Park with trees and space for vegetable and flower gardening. That was where they raised their family. Many jars of raspberry and strawberry jam and rhubarb pies followed. Rhodies and roses were her favorite flowers. Well into her eighties she was still bringing cookies and flowers from her garden when she visited 'the old folks.' It was in her garden that I learned many lessons about life and faith. Lessons such as cutting and sharing flowers just make more flowers in your garden. And lessons about pruning and bearing fruit that we will shortly hear in our gospel reading from John. Gary and I learned about caring for the earth and recycling before it was fashionable. And we learned from mom to 'consider the birds of the fields and the lilies' and to be thankful for God's care.
The family spent precious summer vacation time hiking, camping and fishing with family and friends; as well as trips to Bill's parents' cabin on Hood Canal.
Dela has written that the most important event in their lives was joining Bethel Lutheran Church in 1950, shortly after they moved to Lake Forest Park, where they formed lifelong friendships. They immediately became involved in music. Dela directed the children's choir, Bill played instruments, and they both sang in choir and quartets. Dela sang in Bethel's choir for at least 50 years. She also taught Sunday School, served as confirmation mentor for several youth, served on many committees, and eventually joined the staff as Parish Administrator in the sixties, especially working with children and youth.
During those years, she was part of a small cadre of adults who organized high school youth in a project of sharing faith and singing musicals accompanied by guitars, at Bethel as well as many surrounding congregations and camps, complete with retreats and prayer and fun. The first musical was "Good News" and those 90 plus youth became known as the Good News kids, who of course now are in their sixties.
Several years earlier when Susan was in junior high, Dela started working outside the home in order to earn money to send the kids to college. She worked as a school cook, first at an elementary school and then at a junior high, in the days when they actually cooked the food at each school. So, adding to her Scandinavian baking talents, she learned how to use the big mixers and ovens that led to her making thousands of her legendary cinnamon rolls for Bethel gatherings. She organized lefse baking for special events both at Bethel and in the community like the Foss Home Bazaar. Dela even taught her great grandsons Leif and Max how to roll and bake.
Dela's love of youth also led her to take her cooking and organizing skills into the Bethel kitchen in other ways. She recruited a whole host of partners to help cook, host and clean up for weekly Wednesday night dinners for 120 youth, along with congregational soup suppers many other events at church such as funeral and marriage receptions and women's events. In all these endeavors she was so very grateful for her partnership with Bill and many Bethel friends.
Because 4-H had been an important part of Dela's childhood years, she started a 4-H club when Susan was 8, and was a leader for those girls through high school; also leading a club that included Gary. After Gary went to college, Dela led two more 4-H clubs--a summer program for girls from the Central District and another for developmentally challenged youth and adults living at Fircrest School in Shoreline. In the larger community, Dela was also an organizer for FISH, a volunteer for many other organizations such at LATCH, Bread for the World, North Helpline, and eventually helping to start the North Helpline Food Bank in Lake City, serving as the Secretary of its Board of Directors for 18 years.
Dela lived out her Christian faith in concrete ways and (although she would never tell you) she was given the Brotherhood Award by the National Conference of Christians and Jews for her many volunteer and leadership roles in the greater community. In a Bethel newsletter interview a few years back she said: "Jesus gave us the one important thing we should do: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' That is what keeps me busy at North Helpline, Lake City Food Bank and Bread for the World. I believe we must be continually in prayer for peace in the world." I vividly remember mom saying more than once: "It just drives me crazy when people say they don't feel like doing this or that. Loving your neighbor isn't about liking them or feeling close to them . . . . neighbor love is not about feeling, it's about doing and acting."
In the mid seventies, Bill and Dela began participating in the daily care of Bill's mother Eleanor who had Alzheimers, and supporting Bill's dad still living at home. And then in the midst of all this, in 1988, Dela's husband Bill died unexpectedly of a sudden heart attack. At this time she was especially thankful for her Bethel family. Dela continued caring for Bill's parents through their deaths in 89 and 90.
Dela did get to achieve her childhood goal, becoming a loving grandmother and then great grandmother. Bill and Dela traveled across the country visiting the grandchildren. Dela sewed, knitted, embroidered and designed amazing projects for them all; wrote hundreds of letters; provided home away from home when they were in college; and home during transition times. She has also been a loving mentor, parent, grandparent and godparent to many others gathered here today.
In 2011 Dela moved from her beloved home and garden of 62 years to an independent senior apartment in Lake City, then to assisted living at Foss Home, and finally to Memory Care at Foss. This spring she was giving many signals that she was ready to let go and be at rest with God, after her own journey with Alzheimers. And so it was on Saturday evening, April 28 (almost exactly 30 years after Bill's death), Dela died peacefully at age 92; after her family had gathered with her all morning. Even her great grandchildren had marked her with the sign of the cross.
Dela is preceded in death by her husband Bill; and survived by her son Gary Van Hoy and wife Christine; daughter Susan Vanhoy Burchfield and husband Red; grandchildren Margo Van Hoy, Jesse Van Hoy and wife Elizabeth; Erin Burchfield Hertel and husband Ken and son Walker; and Megan Burchfield Hampson and husband Joe and sons Leif and Max.
Dela was greatly loved in life and will be greatly missed in death.
We are grateful to God for the gift of Adelia Mae Nesset Van Hoy.
Susan Van Hoy Burchfield, daughter
May 20, 2018
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