Tillie was my colleague for many years. and the therapist to whom I sent the people I worried about most in my psychopharmacology practice. She practiced in the expressive tradition — she said relatively little, she let people speak, she let the past arrive in the room and the now on its own — and yet she was never passive or absent behind the method. She managed to be entirely herself while being able to keep to  the therapist’s reserve, which is rare in the therapy world. She refused the false choice between change and acceptance; she held both, and her patients learned to hold both. Her silences said more than most people’s words. She understood the whole human repertoire — the drama, the comedy, and the tragedy — and met each with the same unhurried humanity. In the more remote past, as a school principal,  Tillie authorized my kids, one after another,  to  join me on business trips to many generative places, allied with the kids and I in front of individual teachers (and, in the beginning, my wife)- for whom perfect attendance was paramount. She did it lightly, paraphrasing Mark Twain's "Don't let school interfere with education". In her therapy stance- i thought she embodies an analogue - "Don't let words interfere with communication". Yet one thing Tillie continued doing which was much from the supportive rather than expressive end of therapy- she praised people lavishly. And her praise, not cheep but formative,  made you want to grow to fully inhabit the compliment.  People who had refused help for years accepted it because it was Tillie who offered it; more than once she was, quite literally, a reason someone chose to go on living. To Laura, Ken, and the whole family: none deserves more praise, and she was undeniably one in million. She is irreplaceable to us, who worked with her. I can only imagine the loss and pain you carry.  May her memory be a blessing!
Teodor T. Postolache, MD (Teo)

I am so sorry for your family's loss. Tillie made such an impact on me and the lives of others. It is because of her I was able to start a career as a teacher, learn how to be a leader, and most of all, have a sense of community, belonging,  and confidence. Tillie was funny, caring, and taught me that it was okay to march to the beat of my own drum. I will miss our conversations and always say her name whenever someone asks me who my mentor has been. Thank you, Tillie. May her memory be a blessing.

Mrs. Garfinkel was the principal at Fairland for all five of our children — Nadine, Thea, Sonia, Tudor, and Anna — and for all those years she was the first person they saw in the morning: standing at the door, quiet, welcoming each child by name as if that child were the one she had been waiting for. She believed a school should sing and act and recite, not only test. She filled the calendar with performances and came to every one of them, and at every graduation she read poetry to the children herself — Dr. Seuss, more than once, in a voice that made the fifth graders laugh. Our children learned from her that being welcomed is a . Five of them passed through her door; all five remember it. Laura and Ken, we are so sorry. Your mother was part of our family’s mornings for a very long time,  had a lasting impact on our entire family. 
— Bernadine Postolache

My sincerest condolences for your family’s loss! Tillie Garfinkel will forever be our principal. I had the honor of being one of the many elementary students at Fairland whose lives she touched, with her wisdom, guidance, and strength. There are no words to capture this legacy of giving to your community that she embodied. She had a beautiful impact on me and my family, including pivotal moments of changing my life’s course for the better, responding with genuine kindness. As a little first grader new to the school, she was the first and last kind face to greet us each and everyday at the door.  I truly believe that the education at Fairland under Tillie’s leadership is a cornerstone of my academic and professional journey in the mental health field. She will be very much missed and I know my family will continue to keep her memory with us. Fly high Fairland falcons! With love and so much gratitude
Nadine -former student and mentee

I am so sorry for your family's loss.  Tillie made a difference in so many lives and will be remember by many.   Tillie had touched my life during my years at Fairland Elem.  She offered me encouragement and support during those years.  Through her little notes, thoughtful comments, and kind words, she consistently showed me that my teaching was valued and appreciated.  Those gestures meant so much.  Tillie made me and everyone else feel seen, valued and respected.  Teaching under her leadership was such a wonderful experience.  Tillie is and will always be loved.

Tillie
Thank you for so many years of support and love sounds so minimal to say. You were there through my darkest moments with a hug and a smile. Your wisdom and mentoring made me the leader I am today. As you always said to me after we both left Fairland - “we made great memories and we will always be tied together”. You made us the Fairland Family and for that I will be truly grateful. Love you always! Alie

OBITUARY

Tillie Carol Garfinkel

August 17, 1947 – November 1, 2026

Hines-Rinaldi Funeral Home

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