Edward R. Ayling

May 31, 1937October 28, 2011

STATEN ISLAND, N.Y. — Edward Ayling, 74, a native Staten Islander and former NYPD detective, died Friday in St. Mary’s Medical Center in Langhorne, Pa., after a long illness.

Born in Brooklyn, Mr. Ayling attended high school there before joining the Marines. He served from 1955 to 1958. He was stationed in various places, including Lebanon. While serving, he received his associate’s degree.

After returning from service, Mr. Ayling moved to New Dorp and eventually relocated to Arrochar. He was an detective with the Street Crime Unit and a hostage negotiator with the NYPD and retired in 1989. In 2004 he relocated to Bucks Country, Pa.

In his leisure time, Mr. Ayling loved rooting for the Mets and spending time with his friends and family. “He was very sociable. He had a lot of friends,” said his wife of 24 years, the former Maureen Destasio.

In addition to his wife, Mr. Ayling is survived by three daughters, Elizabeth Thorsen; Barbara Ayling, and Deborah Ayling; a stepson, James Destasio III; two stepdaughters, Barbara Destasio, and Sandra Lynagh; a brother, Raymond Ayling; and 11 grandchildren.

The funeral will be Wednesday from the Virginia Funeral Chapel, Dongan Hills, with a mass at 10 a.m. in St. Ann’s R.C. Church, also Dongan Hills. Arrangements include cremation.


Edward R. Ayling

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Robert Louden

November 4, 2011

It was my pleasure to work with Ed, and Maureen, when they were both members of the NYPD Hostage Negotiation Team. Gone too soon. /s/ Bob Louden - NYPD Chief Hostage Negotiator (retired).

Mansi Shah

November 2, 2011

Dear Deborah,
So sorry to hear about the passing of your father. May God bless you & your family at this time of sorrow.

Cheryl Michaelis-Gerfin

November 1, 2011

Stevie, Barbara and Deborah,
I am very sorry to hear of the passing of your father. I hope you can take comfort that he is at peace and will always be in your heart.
Love to you all.

November 1, 2011

October 31,2011
What moves through us is a silence, a quiet sadness, a longing for one more day, one more word, one more touch, we may not understand why you left this earth so soon, or why you left before we were ready to say good-bye, but little by little, we begin to remember not just that you died, but that you lived. And that your life gave us memories too beautiful to forget.
Our prayers are with you & family.
Indira Prasad, New York.

Thomas McMurray

October 31, 2011

i am sorry for ur loss Barbara and Christa

linda smith

October 31, 2011

May God bless you and your family in this time of sorrow.