Era Hancock of White Rock, British Columbia passed away on Saturday, September 24, 2022.
A funeral service for Era was held Saturday, October 8, 2022 at Victory Memorial Park Funeral Centre, 14831 28th Ave, Surrey. Below are the eulogies that were shared during her celebration.
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Robin Hancock
Hello everyone; on behalf of myself, Elisha and, of course, Era, I’d like to thank you all for coming today to acknowledge the passing, and celebrate the life, of darling Era. To lose Era at such a young age is a tragedy - a life cut all too short. As we all know, Era had to withstand increasing levels of disability and hardship in the past several years, which sadly were becoming more impactful with each passing month.
The various indignities and ailments which stemmed from her MS were a source of regret and heartbreak for her - for all of us who loved her.
But throughout these difficult and trying times, Era showed a resilience and resoluteness that was humbling as it was and awe-inspiring - she rarely complained, if ever, and consistently demonstrated incredible stoicism and patience. I only wish I could have done the same.
We were married for 28 years, together for 30 - this should tell all anyone should ever need to know about Era’s super-human levels of tolerance and humanity! Truth be told, I’d never met anyone like Era before. In those early years especially, she was a force of nature - so much energy, such confidence, such spirit, I was often - usually - left trailing in her wake, which I was more than happy to do.
She was beautiful, of course but also so exotic to me - born in India; she spoke French; played the piano!
And I learned important lessons from her, as you might expect, her being a teacher - such as, how to fold towels and fitted sheets properly, how to never cut your nails at night, to know the lyrics of “Life is a highway” by heart, that Caribou the animal is spelled differently from Cariboo the region. Although not everything stuck with me, despite her best efforts - I never became a fan of Coronation Street, a show she continued to be devoted to, and pineapple on pizza remains a hard ‘No’ for me.
I’ve often thought that Era was the best friend anyone could have. She was so thoughtful - I’m sure we can all attest to the fact that she never forgot any one’s birthday, wherever they were in the world. She was the most generous and loyal friend - her friends were like family to her.
I’m sure many of you here are already familiar with how Era and I first came to meet. I won’t bore you with all the grizzly details, suffice to say it was the event of a series of frankly ridiculous coincidences - which can only mean it was meant to be. A chance introduction to a young Australian backpacking in Europe led, through happenstance and good timing, somehow to me being in an Irish pub one late summer Saturday evening several years later in Vancouver.
We met in a pub in Gastown in 1991 - Era literally saw me across a crowded dance floor and pretty much swept me off my feet. Within a few days her mind was made up, unbeknownst to me, and she made it her mission in life to convince me that she was right, that we were meant to be together. Even if it meant crossing an ocean and leaving the life she was busily making for herself in her brand new teaching career.
We often laughed about the fact that no sooner had I arrived back home from that live-changing vacation that I was greeted with a heavily scented “welcome home” card waiting for me on the doormat.
Era came out to England the following summer, initially working at a summer school and soon thereafter secured a position teaching in a South London elementary school.
Here Era was truly in her element, living her best life - working hard, playing even harder, making fast and lasting friendships. She often spoke of how much she enjoyed this time in her life, without a care in the world.
I was so smart enough to realize I was holding the winning lottery ticket in my hand, all I needed to do was claim the prize! I proposed to her on her birthday in March 1994 (although she was mad at me for not proposing on Valentines Day a few weeks before) and we were married that August.
Our wedding was an amazing occasion, filled with love, fun, family and friends - I’ll never forget it. These were happy days indeed.
Sadly, within just a few short years following our marriage Era was diagnosed with MS, and shortly thereafter we decided to make the move to Canada. Looking back, the decision to emigrate was fraught with risk - neither of us had a job, no money to speak of, and a fresh diagnosis which brought with it a huge amount of uncertainty.
But we both clung to Era’s unwavering confidence that it was absolutely the right thing to do and that it would all somehow work out. I was just happy and grateful to have a partner that I could lean on, safe in the knowledge that whatever hurdles and difficulties were likely to come our way that we would come through it, not just intact but stronger for it.
Not for the first time, Era’s tenacity and fortitude came to the fore and thanks largely to these qualities, these many years later, we’ve been able to make a good life for ourselves, with the support of an incredible extended family and our wonderful friends, both in Canada and the UK, some of whom are here today.
Our greatest accomplishment as a couple, of course, is our amazing daughter, Elisha. Era was born to be a mother - because of her illness were knew there was no guarantee she’d be able to tolerate more than one pregnancy. Thankfully, one was all we needed.
To see the bond that Era and Elisha forged, from the beginning, was a constant source of pride and happiness for Era and I - and she was so unbelievably proud of the young woman Elisha has become.
When the end time came, we are comforted by the fact that her passing was very peaceful and in keeping with her usual generosity of spirit, Era afforded her family the opportunity to tell her, over the course of those final days, just how much she meant to us and how very loved she was.
Darling Era, you will forever be in our hearts. I love you.
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Elisha Hancock
Dear Mom,
Thank you for all you did for me as a mother, even with having limited resources and abilities, you made
me feel loved and feel special every day.
Thank you for being my number one protector. I know from now on you'll still protect me, just from up
above. You will be my guardian angel.
Thank you for pushing me to stick with my piano lessons. Even with me kicking and screaming you’d
always say, “one day you’ll thank me”. Here I am at 21 years old, extremely grateful I know how to play
piano.
Thank you for yelling at the Dairy Queen manager when I flipped my blizzard upside down and all the ice
cream fell out, you made sure I got a new one.
Thank you for holding my hand through all the hard times. I’ll never forget on my first day of high school I
was so nervous, so you waited in the parking lot until I was done.
Thank you for teaching me to enjoy the simple things in life. Even when I’d surprise you with a Broccoli
Crunch salad kit from the grocery store, you’d react as if it was christmas. Doing small acts of service for
you would make me so happy. Being your daughter has taught me how to be empathetic. Even when
buying your salads, you’d gracefully say “this shows me you think about me even when I’m not there”.
Thank you for making me say my daily affirmations when I was little. Every day before school you’d make
me say “I am beautiful. Nobody can make me do anything I don't want to do”.
Thank you for doing your daily check-ins for me every morning. I will truly miss my physical check-ups
when I’d greet you at breakfast and you asking me: “Does your head hurt? Does your tummy hurt? Does
your leg hurt? Do your toes hurt?”.
Thank you for accepting me for who I am.
Thank you for making me the girl who I am today. You always made sure I was comfortable and within my
boundaries. I will live the rest of my life working hard to make you proud.
Thank you for cradling me like a baby anytime I was upset. Even at 20 years old you'd rock me like a
baby while I cried. Just like our favorite book says “as long as I'm living my baby you’ll be”.
I can’t thank you enough for all you’ve done to be the best mom I could ask for. When I was little, you’d
always read me I’ll Love You Forever. Which is why I read the book to you right before you left us. This
will be a book I keep close to my heart for eternity, mostly because it says…
I’ll Love you forever.
I’ll like you for always,
As long as I’m living
My Mommy you’ll be.
With love from your daughter,
Elisha
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Neena Oberoi
My sister was born in New Delhi India on March 9, 1966. Her sense of adventure began before she was born when my dad drove my mom side saddle on his motorcycle to the hospital. In November 1966, when she was 6 months old, my parents immigrated to Winnipeg, Manitoba. But before they arrived, they spent a week in London, a day in Paris and some time in Washington DC. A part of her was left in London, where she later returned in September of 1992 to teach and follow her heart.
For 15 months, Ira was an only child, until my parents welcomed me into this world to be her sister. For the first six years of my life, it was her and I. Since my parents were new immigrants to Canada, they wanted us to be immersed in Canadian culture. We were kept very busy enrolled in swimming, skating, Brownies and piano. Ira was much more of pianist than I was, she played the piano beautifully. Music was always a part of her life, even playing a role when she became a teacher. When she settled in BC, my parents shipped the same piano she learned to play on from Manitoba. She passed her love of music to Elisha, and loved to hear Elisha playing on that same piano.
When Ira was 7 and I was 6, our brother JC was born and was a wonderful addition to our family. Ira and I were so excited to have our own live doll. Sometimes, we would make him cry so we could cuddle him. The woman in the Ahluwalia Bawa family have always been strong minded and stubborn. Jassie was the perfect addition to keep our sisterhood fights to a minimum and constantly be our voice of reason. That is the beautiful thing about sisterhood, no matter how many times we disagreed about things, at the end of the day she was also my lifelong best friend since the day I was born.
Ira gave our parents a run for their money, I’m sure our parents got a few gray hairs from her independence. She experienced life fully and quickly taught us, including my parents the ways of the west. It wasn’t easy for my parents coming to Canada not knowing the Canadian culture, Ira quickly taught them that she was going to be an independent Canadian woman. Attending school dances, parties, dates were all new experiences for my parents. I don’t think my parents were quite prepared for the fireball of energy Ira was. She made life easier for my brother and I as she paved the way. I am pretty sure my parents were happy once the teenage years were over. Ira also introduced a lot of non-Indian cooking to our household because she wanted to try different foods. Era loved to go out to eat, it wasn’t just about the food but enjoying each other’s company.
Ira always had an eye for fashion, she spent some time in California working in the fashion industry with our Raj uncle and living with him and Baljeet Massi. Her closet was an accurate display of her fashion
sense, and one I wish I had. When we lived at home together, I would always borrow her clothes but had to make sure I was home before her so she would not find out.
Growing up we were a tight knit family. We spent our summers, road tripping and camping visiting family across Canada and the US. Despite the many camping trips, Ira was glad when she got a summer job at ChiChis restaurant and did not have to go camping anymore. This was the start to her career path. Before Ira became a teacher she tried different career options, including fashion design, actress, nursing but her love of teaching prevailed. She moved to Vancouver to study education at the University of British Columbia, where she met many lifelong friends. Ira always hated the cold making her move to BC, one of her best decisions. Not only did she escape the cold she met the love of her life Rob which kickstarted her move back to England and their adventure together.
Even though my brother and I lived in different provinces from Era and Rob that didn’t stop us from being close. Every summer we planned a family holiday together so we could hang out with our families. We will continue this tradition with Rob and Elisha. My girls will miss their aunt who they facetimed frequently discussing the best shows to watch on Netflix. Era always had good recommendations on shows to watch or food to eat. She was always interested to hear about what was going on in their lives. She never missed calling on birthdays or anniversaries.
Ira was loved so much by our parents. They moved to Vancouver to be close to her when Elisha was born. We have a large extended family and are so grateful that many of them are here to support us.
My sister was a fighter. Battling Multiple Sclerosis for 25 years she put up a fight till the very end. With the support of her family she was always researching new treatment options that would mitigate the MS symptoms. Ira was not defined by her MS, she continued teaching, having a family of her own, travelling and being an amazing presence in all our lives. Ira had a zest for life and an energy that was contagious and loved by everyone.
When we think of our sister we will never forget her smile, her infectious laughter and the love we shared for each other. We admired her strength and strong determination. The deep sense of loss we all feel losing Era a wife, mother, daughter, sister, aunt and friend cannot be measured. She will be with us always and will never be forgotten. Rest in peace Era – we love you.
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The following words have been written by our mum, Jean Bullivant, and as much as she wanted to be here, at the age of 89 has been unable to make the trip across ‘the pond’ as she would say:
In Memory Of A Much Loved & Missed Daughter-in-Law
I first met Era more than 30-years ago when Robin introduced me to this vibrant, full of life person who you couldn’t help but warm to and be infected with the love that shone out of her.
That was the spirit she lived with and that helped her cope through the last few years of her sadly shortened life.
We spoke on the phone every Tuesday after their move to Canada, rarely missing a week. I was not ‘allowed’ to ring her as she insisted it was cheaper from her end, so it was ‘..no ma, put your phone down, I will ring you back….!”.
We talked about everything under the sun, but especially Coronation Street (a well known Northern soap opera, for those not familiar…). She was a huge fan, as was I. So we had to have a catch-up to see who’d done what to whom!
Tuesdays are no longer the same for me.
When this awful illness began to take to take over more of her life, we all felt so useless over here in England. I just wanted to put my arms around her and give her a huge hug.
I was still hoping to do that, as we had plans to visit next Spring, but sadly it wasn’t to be.
I wanted to tell her how much we all love her and treasure all the times we spent together as a family.
Era, you will never be forgotten. But you’ve left behind some wonderful memories.
We remember a very brave, stoic girl who bore all the distressing symptoms of this very cruel illness with huge fortitude and never said “why me”.
I was so full of admiration for the way she coped.
Dear Era.
We shall love you forever.
Your life was certainly a life well lived but cut short in the most unfair way. But the love you leave behind, will live with us always.
I feel very proud to be able to call you my beloved daughter-in-law.
Much love.
Your English Mum (Ma). xx
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Sally’s eulogy
Era was much loved sister in law to myself and my husband Michael, to Ros and her husband Howard and to David and his wife Julie.
I know those of us that are not here today will be remembering Era in their own way.
I’m going to choose to remember the fun Era, as I know my children Antonia and Joshua will too.
That infectious, loud (obviously!) laugh;
that fabulous, bright red lipsticked smile;
that weird and wonderful broken glass pie she would make at Christmas, that kicked the arse out of our pathetic English trifle;
and of course our joint efforts in the kitchen at party time….we are and always will be ‘the buffet queens…’ Era. Love you always x
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Ross eulogy
Era was a much loved sister-in-law, but, more importantly, a supportive, fun and treasured friend. She was the one person in our often far too British family to dispense her wonderful hugs, spontaneous, timely, generous. She enriched our family, without a doubt.
She was also a fabulous auntie to our children when they were little. Indeed, her babysitting skills are now legendary. I recall one particularly memorable occasion when Rob and Era were looking after our three children, Hannah, Lauren and Joe, who, at the time, were all under six. I was amazed to discover that, on our return, their dad and I were excitedly regaled with their adventures with their aunt and uncle: not for Era would a day at the park or an afternoon in front of the tv suffice. No, with Rob, she took them boating on the River Thames, swimming at the local leisure centre and then afternoon tea below the Queen’s castle in Windsor - all in the space of four hours! The bar was set very high and I never quite managed to emulate this level of entertainment! Throughout, Era injected her irrepressible sense of fun and complete joy of just enjoying life, of finding that pocketful of happiness every day.
My daughters also remember the dance routines she created with them in the back room of our house. I can still see them concentrating and looking up, completely mesmerized by this force-of-nature, energetic, enthusiastic auntie whilst performing to ‘Every little thing she does is magic’ by The Police.
And I guess that’s a very fitting metaphor to Era:she did manage to sprinkle a little bit of magic into all our lives and for that, dear Era, we will always be so very grateful.
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Era's service was live streamed for those who were unable to attend.
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