Florence Blackbird-Lyman

Florence (Blackbird) Lyman was born February 26, 1926 in Rocky Ford, Oklahoma and passed from this life on June 14, 2022, in Tulsa, Oklahoma. She is preceded in death by a baby daughter, Elizabeth Ann, and a baby son, Bill Ross Jr., and her father, John Blackbird, her mother, Lydia Cummings, her husband, Bill Ross Lyman, siblings, Ellamae Van, William Blackbird, Dave Blackbird, Lucille Walker, Sarah Lyman, Annas Downing, Mary Jane Fields, and Wendell Cummings. Florence is survived by her brother, Joseph Cummings, of Keys, Oklahoma, and her daughters and their husbands: Bea Asher and her husband, Ed of Inola; OK; Marilynn Sadler and her husband, Mike, of Tulsa, OK; Sally Hardcastle and her husband, Terry, of Inola, OK; Linda Saye and her husband, Ron, of Tulsa, OK; Roberta Lyman and her husband, Dale Deerinwater, of Inola, OK; and grandchildren, Wendy Dempsey, Eddie Asher, Sean Asher, Chase Asher, Lindsey Helling, Sherrie Coppinger, Andrea Taylor, Stephanie Sadler, Stacey Cantrell, Roberta Crow, Heather Kinney, Cicely Fanning, Daphne Fanning, Vanessa Morris, Kenny Miller, Ashley Wilson, Whitney Miller, and 27 great grandchildren, and 9 great- great grandchildren, and a host of nieces and nephews.

Florence was the eldest of 10 children and due to some unfortunate family circumstances, she became the mother figure to her younger siblings at an early age of 11 years old. While her daddy worked, she used her creative ways to take care of her siblings during a time of no indoor plumbing, no refrigeration, and only cooking with a wood-burning stove. She would take the babies to the creek, set them on a blanket, and catch fish and crawdads for their meals. Leftovers were a tricky thing back then since there was no refrigeration, but again, Florence did the best she knew how. In order to save left-over beans, she would keep them out at room temperature till the next day and would rinse the bean juice off the beans since the beans had soured, and would cook the beans in bacon grease. Yum! Maybe that’s the secret to living to 96!

After several years of taking care of siblings and giving up school, her mother returned home and took the two youngest babies and the second oldest daughter. This was most distressing to Florence, but she was still determined to care for the other children and her daddy. Florence tried to go back to school, but was only able to catch up to the eighth grade. She had another obstacle to face now. A new language. Cherokee was Florence’s first language, and the school she tried to attend did not allow Indians to attend, so she was sent to the Indian school where English was the language used. She was continually disciplined for speaking Cherokee and learned English as a teenager. Since the Cherokee language was frowned upon, she tried to only speak English to her family. And eventually became fluent in English, as did her siblings and mother.

Florence worked many types of jobs throughout her lifetime. Some of her earliest jobs were at the cotton fields caring for the children of the families that worked in the fields. She cleaned, ironed, and cooked. By this time, she was an excellent cook as a young teenager. Cooking was definitely something she has done well throughout her lifetime. She later cooked for work camps and a school cafeteria. Back then, everything was homemade everyday... even her fresh rolls. Everyone loved her rolls! But cooking for her family has always been the most important and special to her. She always watched what people ate and how much they ate of her cooking. It gave her such a sense of pride to see a smile on someone’s face after tasting her delicious meals. Oh, how much we will miss watching her at the stove working her magic and eating her amazing food!

Florence married Bill Ross Lyman in 1947. After having two daughters, Bea and Marilynn, they moved to California during which the family grew. After nine years they returned to Oklahoma with three more daughters, Sally, Linda, and Berta.

After the passing of her husband, she moved to Tulsa and became a caregiver to several families until she accepted a job at The University of Tulsa as a maintenance technician. That was her title, although she simply called herself, a janitor. She worked at TU for 13 years until she retired. She loved her job there and the people she worked with. She was responsible for cleaning the classrooms and professors offices, but on Saturdays, she cleaned Sharp Chapel. Sharp Chapel is where weddings and receptions were held and it was a coveted job her older grandchildren remember fondly. Each week they would wait to see which one was “the chosen one” to go with her and help clean the building after those weddings. Not only did you get to watch a wedding sometimes, but there was always a promise of a Wendy’s Hamburger. Florence walked to the Wendy’s restaurant daily on her lunch break and Saturday was no exception. She loved hamburgers! Even up until she lost her appetite, when you asked her what she wanted to eat her reply was, “Oh, a hamburger sounds good.”

Florence got her driver’s license as an adult but never liked driving. She would have her daughters drive her even before they were old enough or had a license themselves. And even later when her grandchildren became pre-teens, she would want to go somewhere and let an underage grandchild drive her around. And she would always say, “Don’t tell your mom!”

Florence was a caretaker, a great cook, a diligent and hard worker; she was witty, feisty, sarcastic, and had a great sense of humor, loved to go places, and was the matriarch of a large family. A family she loved and a family that loved her dearly. Whether it was her siblings or her own children, she wanted her family to be together. She especially loved her daughters. She was happiest when they were with her just talking, laughing, and acting silly like only they can do. They were her joy. And how beautiful a picture it is that the “caretaker” was so lovingly taken care of by one of her daughters in her last years. Linda has sacrificed much to lovingly care for Florence and it shows such a wonderful picture of God’s mercy and care for His own children.

Florence wasn’t a perfect mom, or granny, or wife, or sister, or daughter, but she was definitely the glue that held her family together. Although one thing is certain, Florence was a sinner who repented and asked Jesus to be her Lord and Savior at the age of 79. Knowing she is in the arms of Jesus is such a comfort. “The only time good-bye is painful is when you know you will never say hello again.” Anonymous. Florence will definitely want to be able to greet all of you with a smile and say “ ‘Siyo” in heaven one day, so please don’t let this time of reflecting on such a beautiful life go without thought to your eternal home.

Funeral services for Florence Blackbird-Lyman will be held on Friday, June 17th, 2022 at 1:00pm at Reed-Culver Chapel with Pastor DJ McCarter officiating with obituary reading by Chase Asher. She will be laid to rest at Oaks Cemetery. Serving as pallbearers will be Eddie Asher, Sean Asher, Chase Asher, Kenny Miller, Michael Taylor, Elijah Taylor, Jaxon Coppinger, and Tyson Crow. Honorary pallbearers include Justin Dempsey, Seth Warder, Branden Crow and Braiden Crow.

A visitation will be held prior to the services on Friday, beginning at 10:00am.

Fond memories and expressions of sympathy may be shared at www.reedculver.com for the Blackbird-Lyman family.