Alice Virginia Haynes

The Early Years

Alice Virginia Haynes was born on Jan. 31, 1931 in Amarillo Texas as the great depression was underway. She was the only child of Curtis Jay and Virsie Lee Holland Jay.

When Alice was two years old she lost her father to appendicitis, and her mother moved with her to Abilene, Texas where Virsie met and married Lonnie B. Williams. Lonnie adopted Alice, and he and Virsie went on to add to the family. Alice became big sister to a brother and two sisters.

As a child, Alice and her family lived in Texas, New Mexico and Arizona. After she married, she settled permanently in Tucson where she and her husband raised 6 children, 3 boys and 3 girls.

The “In Between” Years

Alice began working for Hughes Aircraft in the late 60’s and, after her retirement, she enjoyed attending water aerobics classes, caring for her grand children and great grandchildren and perfecting her skills in solving crossword puzzles. She also became more active in Phillips Chapel CME church, the church she had been a member of since she was a young woman. She was an avid reader, and was constantly swapping books with friends, neighbors, and family members.

Alice was passionate about solving very complex crossword puzzles, and learning new words from them. She also enjoyed putting together complicated puzzles that were 1,000 pieces or more. The more difficult the puzzles were, the more challenged she was, and it was a real victory for her when she completed one. She had several of them laminated and framed, and she hung them on the walls throughout her home.

Another passion of Alice’s was collecting unique and unusual wind chimes, and she lined her front porch with them. She loved opening her front door, on a windy day, and listening to the melody of the wind chimes blowing in the wind. Family members knew that they could never go wrong by gifting her with a wind chime for her birthday, Christmas, Mother’s Day, or “just because”.

She came to enjoy the Nook that her son gave her for her 81st birthday. At first there was skepticism as to whether or not she would use it, but that was put to rest when the Nook soon became her new best friend. She would spend hours working on mastering the various games and applications and when her Nook developed a technical glitch, she was relentless in trying to determine what the problem was, and getting it fixed so that she could continue the love fest she had with it.

Alice’s priority was her family. She was eager to show anyone who visited her home, the pictures she had of her children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren that were displayed throughout her home and lined her dining room walls. She was very proud of them all.

Alice’s pride and joy was her home. Over the course of many years, additional rooms were added on to her existing home, and she delighted in remodeling, decorating, and furnishing those new additions. She loved browsing through Home and Garden, House Beautiful, and Good Housekeeping magazines and getting ideas that she incorporated into her decorating plans. She was always on the lookout for the latest and best sale.

Alice looked forward to decorating her home during the Christmas holidays, and her decorations were exquisite. She enjoyed watching her grandchildren and great grandchildren experience the joy of watching the revolving Christmas tree with the beautiful ornaments, the talking Santa, the bright lights, and the train circling the Christmas tree.

If you called Alice and asked her what she was doing, she usually responded “nothing”, but after talking to her further, she would eventually tell you what she was doing or had done during the course of the day. It was usually a far cry from “nothing”. On any given day, you could find her grocery shopping, strolling through the “petite” section of Macy’s, watching her favorite Soap Opera or an old black and white movie, working on one of her crossword puzzles, playing Scrabble or advanced Solitaire, tinkering with her Nook, reading the latest best seller, listening to music her son had downloaded to her iPod, or zipping around Tucson in her red Chevy truck. Her family would tease her about her “I’m doing nothing” comment.

The Golden Years

The last two years of Alice’s’ life were extraordinary. She was hospitalized in April 2011 and had surgery performed, after which her Surgeon and Oncologist informed her and her family that she had two weeks to live. She was sent home complete with Hospice staff and a variety of medications, but Alice had other plans. Within three months of that prognosis, Alice had returned to the life she was living prior to her surgery. She resumed driving herself to church, doing her grocery shopping, and shopping at Macy’s, her favorite department store. It was not uncommon to see her running errands while zipping around Tucson in her red Chevy truck.

Alice never turned down an offer to go somewhere or do something with her family, and she truly did live each day as if it were her last. During the last two years of her life, Alice saw many movies, attended numerous plays and concerts, ate at a variety of restaurants around Tucson, and attended a variety of fundraising events with her children. She enjoyed taking part in celebrating her children, grand children and great-grandchildren’s birthdays as well as the birthdays of her daughter-in-law’s family. She accompanied her family to their weekly exercise/dance class where they encouraged her to participate, but she chose to support them as a spectator. She particularly looked forward to the annual post Christmas shopping trips to Phoenix where she was able to take advantage of all of the after Christmas sales. She eagerly anticipated her annual road trips to California and Nevada, with her son and his family, and enjoyed recounting the details of those trips and how much fun she had.

Each year Alice’s family rang in the New Year by attending the J.W. Marriott’s annual New Year’s Eve Jazz Extravaganza. Her family had always encouraged her to join them on the dance floor, but she always declined; that is until this past New Year’s Eve event. When the music began, her family took to the dance floor and half way through the song Alice suddenly appeared on the floor, dancing and enjoying herself. Her daughter-in-law stopped dancing, went to the family’s table, retrieved her camera, and returned to take some candid pictures of Alice dancing the night away with her family and friends. She always enjoyed staying overnight, and waking up to have brunch with her family on New Year’s Day. The 2013 New Years Eve Jazz Extravaganza was the best one yet!

Alice had always wanted to see the Broadway play “Wicked”. It came to Tucson in 2012, but she didn’t find out about it until the play had come and gone. She was so excited when she learned that “Wicked” was returning to Tucson in March 2013 for a two week run. Two weeks before Alice passed, she saw “Wicked” with her family, and thoroughly enjoyed the play and the dinner they shared afterwards.

Alice had lived in Tucson most of her adult life, but never really had the chance to experience the beauty of the desert until she began attending events at the J. W. Starr Pass Marriott Resort & Spa. She had a fear of heights and, as a result, she had never been comfortable driving up to “A” mountain, Sabino Canyon, Mt. Lemmon, or Old Tucson, and never had the opportunity to experience the beauty that those scenic places offered. However during the last few years of her life, she came to appreciate the beauty of the desert and the Tucson skyline when she started attending different events at the J.W. Marriott Starr Pass Resort and Spa, and was able to experience Tucson from the vantage point of the incredible views from the Resort. She especially liked the view of Tucson that she saw when she walked across the Resort breezeway at night. It was a “no brainer” when her family asked her where she wanted to celebrate her milestone 80th birthday.

When Tucson experienced a substantial snowfall in the winter before she passed, Alice was just as excited about the winter wonderland as her great-grandsons were. She was fascinated by the snow capped Catalina Mountains, and the white clouds hovering over and in between them. She loved the beautiful Arizona sunsets, and particularly enjoyed the beauty of the desert when it bloomed in the spring.

While Alice was soft spoken, reserved and was known for her genteel nature, in reality she was a very strong willed and determined woman. She did not engage in idle chit chat, and was always the one quietly listening as others talked. However when she did speak, everyone listened because they knew that she had something to say that was worth listening to.

Because of that quiet demeanor and wisdom, family and friends sought her advice on many occasions. She always listened intently to other’s concerns, and was always there with words of encouragement and support. She was a surrogate mother to some, and a good friend and trusted confidante to others.

In the last three years of her life, Alice was able to experience the joy that comes from adding to the third generation of children in the family. She was able to celebrate the addition of two new great-grandsons who were born in 2010, 3 months apart from one another. She enjoyed doting on and playing with them, and sometimes it was difficult to determine who the children were, and who the adult was. She had a very unique and special relationship with each of them, and looked forward to their visits.

Alice was never permanently bedridden, nor did she ever require the use of a cane, walker or wheelchair. She lived an active life up until the very end, and passed away on Thursday, April 25, 2013, at her home and in her own bed, which was as she had wished. Her transition was peaceful, tranquil, and surrounded by loved one.

Those that she leaves behind will always remember her quiet and gentle spirit, and her unwavering devotion to her family. Alice's final resting place is in the curio in her living room, next to her son Jimmy's Urn.