Ernest Reuben Scow

Born in Alert Bay, mainly because the government didn't want births to occur in our villages anymore. Dad's parents were Chief Peter Scow and mother was Margaret Scow (nee Newman). Dad was the youngest of 7, his brother Alfred was the oldest, followed by 5 sisters, in order, Grace, Annie, May, Emily, Helen who was 12 years older than dad, before dad brought up the rear and was last. Sad circumstances were most likely the reason dad was born, as his sister Annie Laura died from TB at the age of 18, so one year later in 1927 dad was born.

Having sons was important in our culture and this was no exception, dad was raised very traditionally in our village of Kingcome Inlet, as his bloodlines tied him to a very rich culture in which his family that he was born into had very strong ties and lineage to. 3 years into his young life, he tragically lost his mother, she was 50 years old, it played a very important part in his early life, as his older sisters helped raise him, shortly before both got married and started their own families. Grandpa Peter Scow would take dad out fishing with him in the summers, rare in those times, for a 3-year-old to spend the summers out on a fish boat. Being on the ocean would be in dad's blood and for just about 90 years, the ocean would be a place of tranquility for him. The role his sisters played cannot be stressed enough, he made certain to tell anyone that his sisters shaped who he was, and molded him into the respectful, hardworking family man with high integrity and as honest as the day is long.

In 1933 just before he turned six, he began school, at Kingcome Inlet day school, then at the age of 10 began residential school at St Mikes in Alert Bay, where he spent four years of his life. Yearning for family and loneliness became part of daily routine and made the days seem so much longer. Even being at residential school with nephews, nieces and many close relatives, did not dissuade from the situation that they were being transformed. Speaking their own language was forbidden, a culture rich in history, tradition and knowledge was no longer practiced by the children and their lives would forever be changed.

Dad had immense faith, which served him well for his entire life, he had always been a glass half full person, with a stubborn never give up attitude. Leaving St Mikes at 14, almost a full-grown man of 170 pounds. Almost immediately his brother took him aboard his seine boat where he was part of a crew with his nephews Jimmy Dawson and Lawrence Scow, A few years later, he would purchase his own gillnet boat, with the help of his father. Over the decades dad would own a few different boats, but much like his dad did with him, he took all his sons on his boat fishing with him, it was with immense pride he would share the tails of teaching all his boys some of what was shared with him by his father. His three older sons would eventually all have their own gillnet boats, carrying on the family tradition. Once dad had his own boat, he was already with the love of his life, our mother Harriet, they would be together over 2 years before marrying in Feb 1946, in a traditional cultural wedding in a big house in Gilford Island.

They would go on to have 5 sons and a daughter. Splitting time between our two villages of Kingcome Inlet and Gilford Island was something a few did in those days, also in 1946 Dad’s only brother Alfred would die in December, the landscape of his life was changing, with no notice and would have an impact on decisions the family made in the years to come. Dad missed seeing his brother once more by mere minutes, landing in Alert Bay on the boat, he ran to the hospital, but it was too late, elders surrounded Alfred, singing hymns to him, and it hit dad hard he had to turn around and run out of the room. When mom had her second child in 1948, Mom wanted a bigger place and home of their own , and they would primarily reside in Gilford Island, because it meant they would have their own house. In 1951 they would have their only girl. Dad worked even harder, clam digging in the winter months, and working with logging companies. Their fourth child came in 1954, yet another son it would be, and in 1960 a fifth child was also a boy. A few months after this birth, dad would be diagnosed with TB, a disease which had already taken the lives of 3 of his sisters and his mother, amongst many other relatives in our villages.

Shortly after dad was admitted to the Indian TB hospital in Nanaimo, his only daughter would soon join, a very difficult time for both of them, as much like residential school, you could not visit females on the opposite side, they were sequestered. Dad would be admitted in Sept 1961, vowing he would be out before salmon fishing season the following summer, and with his deep faith ( and very healthy doses of Balsam Bark tea made by my moms Aunty Mary ( Mun’tla ) and extreme stubbornness he was indeed released June of 1961. Sadness struck him again during his stay in Nanaimo, he lost his father, at aged 92, dad could not attend the funeral, as he was not clear of TB yet, and this would have a profound effect on him. During his stint in TB hospital, letter writing with mom, spawned the idea of moving, at first, they tried the village of Fort Rupert near Port Hardy, after a one-year stay, they then moved to Cape Mudge on Quadra Island, but in 1964, they found a house in Campbell River, where they paid $25.00 a month. A few years of being renters, they then decided to purchase their own home.

This was the goal when they left our village in Gilford Island, to own their own home, be close to schools for the kid's education and be near a hospital. Losing both their fathers and countless other family members, was part of the reason for the move, coupled with the fact both mom and dad were not drinkers nor partiers, and unemployment and alcoholism were both prevalent in the village, so moving was instantly accepted by the whole family. Marriages by the three oldest children and all purchasing their own homes was indeed a high point in my parents' life. Hard working and good paying jobs made them all self-sufficient and all starting families of their own brought grandkids, which was something mom and dad dearly desired. They were amazing grandparents, very loving, caring and attentive to all the grandchildren.

Soccer, basketball and softball were all part of our fathers life, being very active and healthy was of high importance to him, in his teens, working in the woods and coming home from work to play soccer with his contemporaries before and after supper helped earn lifelong friendships and help keep the village a tight knit community.

At 18 years of age he would become a starter on the highly competitive Kingcome Wolves team. His older brother played on the first squad that began in 1923, it was a proud and prestigious club. Soccer would become integral in our family. What may not be known is dad was a good shooter in basketball and a very intimidating pitcher in softball, perfecting curve balls, with perfecting the whipping half arc delivery and clipping his hip before releasing the ball made the ball do funny things and strikeouts would be piled up by dad, He was the cleanup hitter on a St Mikes team loaded with players from other nations as well.

Mom and Dad had two main goals at the outset of their marriage, to be the best husband/wife they could be, and to be the best parents they could be. They may not have agreed all the time, but on the few occasions when they did, mom got her way, beginning with the move of the family away from the village.

55 years of marriage, and raising a family of six, in which the two oldest had brief spells in residential school. The oldest would later finish his school through a boarding school program way out in Ladner, BC.

A daughter also surviving a bout with TB, and moving to a town where they did not belong to the reserve, and being First Nations in a middle-class neighborhood provided many challenges, but they persevered.

We have much to be grateful for and our dad showed us what hard work and a never say die attitude can do for you. He was always there for us and showed us all unconditional love, putting us before anything else. He gave up so much for all of us, at each difficult time in any of our lives, it was dad who would drop everything to lend assistance or support. I can name multiple times in all my siblings' lives where it was dad who was highly visible at important crisis in our lives.

His love extended to all our family, our house was rarely empty for many decades, we had company all the time. Our parents supported, lent a hand, put a roof over their heads and food on the table for countless dozens, all without expecting any payment in return. I've heard the stories from many of them, and literally we couldn't count them all, but it has to be over 100 family members who our parents helped out over 6 decades. Showing us all by example what both our parents learned, to pick up the slack when needed and support your family, as best as you can was an amazing teaching they showed all of us. Dad spent 20 plus years as a widower, something we or he did not anticipate, but once again his deep faith and belief carried him through. He had two severe heart attacks in which he just sat through them and prayed. His strength, courage, and will to live are to behold. Even in his latter years, he wasn’t certain why he lived such a long life, but I think a testament to him was his love of family, his extreme gratitude to his sister Annie that he never knew, to his Mother who passed when he was 3, his sister Grace who passed when he was 12, his sister Helen and brother Alfred who both passed in 1946 when he was 18, his sister Emily in 1956, and father in 1961, culminating in Aunty Mays death in 1995, leaving dad the last of his generation, alone for so many years and decades. The unrelenting love, not just to his siblings, parents , but to all the offspring of his siblings, and children of his Uncle’s Chief John Scow and Chief George Scow. With immense pride, he can go up and down the family tree, and tell you the order in which all the children were born of those in his Scow line. His Mom’s legacy never faded from Dad’s memory neither, knowing her line and connection to other families, dad knew equally as well as his father Peter’s lineage. Showing by example was a gift he shared. May our father now rest in peace, he has earned his rest. Until we meet again Dad…