Thomas H. van Arsdale

June 20, 1937 - February 23, 2023

Tom, affectionately known as “Sir Tom” to his family and friends, passed away surrounded by his family on February 23, 2023 from aggressive pancreatic cancer. Tom passed in the Hospice Life Facility in Wilmington, NC where he received excellent care during his final stage in life.

Tom is survived by his wife of 37 years, Susette. They have two sons, Tommy and Matthew. Tom’s family also includes his daughter Kathy Hefele, husband Rich, and two sons Clark and Kent; son, Jim van Arsdale, his wife Connie, and their two children Kathryn and James; daughter Debby Guedes, husband John, and two sons Jacob and Patrick; his sister Marianne Lindquist and husband David. He was predeceased by his brother Frank John van Arsdale, Jr. 

Tom was born in Brooklyn, NY to Kathryn Anna Seele and Frank John van Arsdale, Sr. His family moved to Fitzwilliam, NH when Tom was 14 years old. Tom attended Keene High School and graduated in 1955. Tom graduated from Thomas Edison State University and Brown University’s Graduate School of Banking.

After high school, Tom enlisted in the US Army. Tom was assigned to serve in the Signal Corps as a top secret cryptographer due to his high intelligence scores. He served his country from June 1957 to June 1959 and received an honorable discharge. 

After his service, Tom began his business career in banking in New Jersey and quickly rose to the position of Vice President. In 1985 he became President and CEO of the Savings Bank of Central Jersey where he served from 1985 to 1989. He was President of the Dime of New Jersey and President and CEO of Franklin First, PA. Tom was a member of the Pennsylvania Bankers Association, America's Community Bankers and chair of the Community Bankers Council of the Federal Reserve Bank of Philadelphia.

Tom retired in 1999 when he and his family moved to Wilmington, NC. Tom has always given back to the community, serving on several academic and cultural boards. He joined the Cameron Executive Network at UNCW, served on the vestry at St James Episcopal Church, was Chairman of the Cameron Art Museum, served on the board of Cape Fear Academy, and was a member of the New Hanover Emergency Response Team.

Tom did not stay retired for long. He worked as a substitute teacher at Cape Fear Academy and St. Mark Catholic School. He loved being in the academic environment. In 2018, Tom started working for Cape Fear Provisions, Boars Head as an ambassador. He traveled to various grocery stores to train staff in new products and interact directly with customers. He worked for Boars Head up until two weeks before he passed.

In 1998, one of Tom’s proudest achievements was being invited to join and subsequently being invested in the US Priory of The Order of St. John. The Order is a Royal Order of Chivalry that was first constituted by a Royal Charter from Queen Victoria. The Sovereign Head is currently His Majesty King Charles III. On November 8, 2008, Tom was raised to the grade of Knight of Grace of The Order of Saint John by then Lord prior Anthony Roger Mellows, OBE, GCStJ, TD. Hence “Sir Tom”.

Tom enjoyed being with his family, walking on the beach, spending Friday nights on dates with Susette, running (especially marathons), playing tennis, entertaining friends and shaking a martini for them.

His wife, Susette, would like to thank everyone for their cards and kind words of support. It has been heartwarming through a very sad and difficult time. She wishes to share some of your written words describing Tom: loving husband and father, soft spoken, articulate, impeccably dressed, caring, friendly, a true gentleman, compassionate, thoughtful and a lovely man.

In lieu of flowers or other offerings, kindly donate to the charity of your choice in honor of “Sir Tom” van Arsdale.

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