Maria Elena J. Benitez

Maria Elena Jacobo Benitez, age 90, of Chula Vista, California passed away peacefully on Saturday, January 6, 2024. She was born in Bariometo, Sinaloa, Mexico on November 15, 1933 to Fidel Jacobo and Porfiria Espinoza. She was the youngest of eight children, affectionately called “Nena” by her family. As a child she loved playing baseball and was in the choir at her church. She left school after 6th grade to work at the cooperative store of the local sugar cane factory. By the time she was a teenager, she had lost both parents and went to live with an older sister. In her late teens, another sister encouraged her to move north for better opportunities.

As a young adult, Nena built a life for herself in northern Mexico. She worked at a restaurant in Mexicali, volunteered for the Red Cross collecting donations at the border, and made many friends in her new home. By the late 1950s she had two sons who were her world. When things didn’t work out with their father, her friends set out to find her someone better.

Nena met Jose Conklin Benitez through mutual friends. He was newly divorced with five children of his own. Nena agreed to a blind date set up by Jose’s friend but was clear that her biggest priority was that Jose was a good fit for her life, that he would love her two boys. The blind date was a success, and the rest is history. They were married in 1961 and had four daughters of their own, a modern, blended American family. Their life together in Chula Vista was full of love and laughter. Nena was very spontaneous, often persuading Jose to dance with her with a playful “ándale viejo!” Through good times and bad, they were dedicated to each other. Jose was the love of her life. He passed away in 1994 and Nena cared for him devotedly until the very end.

Nena was a woman of many talents. She took English classes while raising her family. She had a flair for cake decorating and built a reputation for herself in the community as the go-to for special occasions. She could sew and crochet and made clothes and blankets for her children and countless family members. Her love of singing continued as an adult as she was a member of her church choir for many years. Her skills in the kitchen were unmatched. Whether making hundreds of tamales every year for Christmas or slapping together the humble “grandma sandwich,” Nena always ensured her family was well-fed and well-loved.

She was an avid reader, especially of the Reader’s Digest. Her musical interests spanned genres from Johnny Cash and Gene Autry to Vicente Fernandez, Pedro Infante, and Jorge Negrete. She would always sing along to the radio while cooking. Nena was a big fan of novelas; she was known to slip away from family parties to catch the latest episode of her favorites. She loved Chinese food but perhaps even more, she loved ice cream – she always had room for a paletita after dinner.

Nena was a dedicated homemaker, but she was also a savvy entrepreneur. She was an Avon Representative for 30+ years starting in her early forties, working her way up to the President’s Club. She built a loyal customer base and maintained strong relationships with all her clients. Working for Avon started as a way to contribute a little extra for her family, but even after her children were grown, she continued because it gave her a sense of independence and she enjoyed the social aspect of serving her customers. Throughout her life Nena was a go-getter. If there was something she wanted to do, she would make it happen; if she didn’t know how, she would find someone who could teach her.

Nena would say that her greatest achievement was her family; her legacy is her family. She was a strict but loving mother who always wanted the best for her children. As an immigrant she had one foot in both worlds, careful to impart her cultural traditions while pushing her children to dream big in her new country. She instilled the value of education. She built memories for her children through beach days and church days, birthday parties and annual visits to Sinaloa. In the latter half of her life, Nena delighted in her grandchildren and great-grandchildren. She would frequent ballet recitals, graduations, soccer games and Grandparents Days with enthusiasm. She would often have a few grandchildren in tow at daily mass and on the long walk home. She showered them with hugs, blessings, and the occasional dab of purple medicine, and showed them off with pride at every opportunity.

Nena lived a life of love, service, and faith. She had a big heart and went out of her way to help those in need. Her family witnessed her charity to others over the years as she often welcomed friends in need into her home. She will be remembered for her generosity of spirit and her devotion to her Catholic faith. For the last decade she battled Alzheimer’s Disease, and it must have been difficult to slowly forget the life she knew. But even on the foggiest days her spark showed through and a glimmer in her eyes would remind us that she was still the same feisty, charismatic, loving Nena. She lived the American Dream. Who could have imagined when her sister nudged her to move north all those years ago that this is how wonderful her life would be?

Nena is survived by sons Carlos Jacobo (Maria) and Alejandro Jacobo (Linda); daughters Elizabeth Gutierrez (Francisco), Margarita Sticker, Manuela Aragon, Mary Benitez-Nixon (Joy); goddaughter Alicia Cacayan (Lodivico, Jr.); stepchildren Joseph Benitez (Irene), Alexander Benitez, and Anita Vidal (Leo); and many nieces and nephews across the U.S. and Mexico.

She is also survived by grandchildren Carlos Jacobo, Jr. (Melissa), Jeannette Jacobo, Rafael Rodriguez (Denisse), Daniel Rodriguez (Karla), Christina Jacobo (Matthew Hubbell), Veronica Jacobo, Victoria Castro (Misael), Joseph Gutierrez (Lindsay), Stephanie Jacobo, Mark Aragon, Jr., Jennifer Gutierrez, Sarina Aragon-Lopez (Bernardo), Samuel Aragon, Matthew Cacayan, and Vanessa Cacayan. Her surviving great-grandchildren are Camila and Carolina Jacobo; Ricky and Isaac Rodriguez; Daniel, Elijah, and Isaiah Rodriguez; Mya, Delilah, and Noah Castro; and Issac McElroy-Jacobo.

She is predeceased by her parents Fidel and Porfiria; husband Jose; daughter Leticia Jacobo; stepchildren Betty Ososkie and Bertha Garcia; and siblings Juan Francisco, Felicita, Maria del Rosario, Carlos, Maria Luisa, Maria Silvina, and Martha.

The family would like to thank the medical staff who helped care for Nena in her final years: the Glenner Town Square for providing an enriching environment for dementia patients; the nurses from the St. Paul’s PACE Akaloa home care department who cared for her at home daily; the respite nurses from Senior Helpers who visited Nena while her loved ones took a break from caring for her; and all the doctors and nurses from St. Paul’s PACE clinic who did home visits and met her needs as she became less mobile. Accompanying a loved one on their Alzheimer’s journey is not easy, but the San Diego Alzheimer’s Organization helped the family learn how best to care for Nena with patience and thoughtfulness.

“Not all of us can do great things, but we can do small things with great love.” St. Teresa of Calcutta

A visitation for Maria Elena will be held Monday, January 15, 2024 from 2:00 PM to 12:00 AM at Funeraria del Angel Chula Vista, 753 Broadway, Chula Vista, CA 91910. A rosary will occur Monday, January 15, 2024 at 6:00 PM at Funeraria Del Angel Chula Vista, 753 Broadway, Chula Vista, California 91910. A Funeral Mass will occur Tuesday, January 16, 2024 from 11:00 AM to 12:00 PM at Our lady of Guadalupe, 345 Anita Street, Chula Vista, CA 91911. A graveside service will occur Tuesday, January 16, 2024 from 12:30 PM to 1:30 PM at Holy Cross Cemetery, 4470 Hilltop Drive, San Diego, CA 92102.