Doris Jean McKelvie

Doris Jean (Wakefield) McKelvie was born on November 23, 1924 in Shelburne, Ontario to Elma Maude Grant Fowler and George Wakefield. Her parents were from England. Her mother came from Exmouth, Devon and her father came from Reading, Beedon.

Mum wrote: I grew up on First Avenue in Shelburne, Ont. My mother was a lovely lady, a real English person with peaches and cream complexion. Mother loved to work with her hands and was always knitting or crocheting. She always had to wear her pearls. My Dad was a very hard working man. He worked for Imperial Oil for 36 years. He had a large vegetable garden. Dad kept horses in a barn out back in the winter.

Mum had two older sisters, Marguerite and Irene. Mum and Irene shared a bedroom.

Mum enjoyed all sports, baseball, basketball, tennis, hockey. And she was a good athlete. In winter she skated, snowshoed, and skied. She also enjoyed dancing. Mum would sing in the choir and also sang solos at church. Often her sister, Irene, played the organ for her.

Mum worked at White's Grocery store on Saturdays and made $0.75. After working a year she asked for a 25 cent raise and they said no so Mum quit. She babysat and made 25 cents a night. Mum always did a lot of sewing, painting and loved to cook. As a teen when her mother took ill Mum did all the cooking and baking at home. Mum also went to Farmerette camp for 2 summers and enjoyed that. After graduating from high school in Shelburne Mum went into nursing at St. Joseph's Hospital in Toronto. Two years into her training she married Dad so had to drop out of the program.

They lived in Windsor, Stratford, Hensall, and Essex where Dad worked as a veterinarian.

Mum was a very loving caring nurturing devoted mother. Mum devoted her life to caring for her family. She and Dad created a loving family.

My memories go back when I was preschool age when mum worked hard sewing, cooking and keeping the house in order.

Mum could make a meal for us all out of a pound of meat. And if Dad was late getting home from work the meal was just as good, even if she had to keep it warming in the oven for an hour. Mum made it all look easy.

We all went to church and on the way home we would get a pint or brick of ice cream and have it for dessert after salmon sandwiches.

I can see Mum in the kitchen and at her sewing machine. She sewed curtains for the trailers that were manufactured in town. She also grew cucumbers to sell. Dad's office was in the house and I recall Mum dispensing medicines to farmers if Dad was out on country calls.

Mum made us elaborate Halloween costumes then. All sewn by her. It was amazing what she could do with crepe paper for my little Bo peep outfit. And Dad's roll of cotton batten came in hand for Robert's grand king costume. Another Halloween I was the Little Dutch Girl from the cleaner Dutch Cleanser. Mum had save many labels from the product and sewn them around the hem of my dress. Which I believe was one of her nurse's uniforms. I looked just like the little girl on the can.

Mum and Dad were instrumental in organizing the bean festive in Hensall. And one year mum was on TV demonstrating how to make the Hensall Bean Festival baked beans. I remember how excited we were to see her on local TV. That would have been in the early 1950's Mum was a wonderful mother to Robert and Anne. She loving stayed at home to run the household. As well as helping Dad manage the veterinary office, Mum raised money in many ways, sewing curtains for the Trailer business and growing and selling vegetables. In Essex Mum started up a business with Fran Francottie called Fran-Dor Gift Shoppe. Everywhere they lived Mum was involved in church, community organizations and clubs and held positions as president in all.

Mum was a devoted daughter. When her mother needed her there after her dad died and later when both my grandmothers needed help she took her turn to care for them in her home or their home. Mum would send grandma pink carnations each month.

As Robert mentions below Mum was the ultimate hostess. She loved to have people over. And would remember just what they liked and if they had a special drink she would be sure to have it on hand. The parties. Lots of food! And lots of clean up which she would get my girlfriend, Beth and I to do after they left for the dance....so it would be clean when they returned to party more after the dance!

Mum loved to entertain and try new things. And we served everything elegantly with doilies on silver trays for parties, fancy napkins, the whole shooting match! Mum made a special meal and used the good dishes every Sunday for dinner in the dining room. We really appreciated her meals.

I remember one time though, we had band exchange students staying with us for a couple of days. Mum made this beautiful meal. Whole chicken breasts with a fresh mushroom sauce and spiced peaches on the side. And of course some fresh green vegetable and lovely potatoes. And Dad and I were eating and going on about how tasty it was. We looked over and the two visiting girls were barely touching their meals. It was sad. My mum's creativity in the kitchen was beyond their appreciation. But Dad and I sure enjoyed it. I can still taste it! Everyone else who came for dinner though, knew it would be a delicious meal with equally spectacular desserts. Like crepe Suzette's flambé or baked Alaska, fresh berry or fresh peach or cherry pie. Or when Mum took a baking lesson and made us many samples of ganache for such beautiful cakes.

We had a welcoming home. There were always lots of visitors, especially at Christmas. My mother made at least 12 different types of cookies and squares and my job was to keep the silver platter full whenever the doorbell rang.

The pantry downstairs was always full at the end of the harvest season. Mason jars of peaches, pears, plums, pickles ....bread & butter, dill, lazy housewife (her mother's recipe), relish, jams strawberry, raspberry, black currant. We lived in the sun parlour of Canada so we had access to fresh produce and Mum preserved enough of it to last all winter. One tomato season Mum picked tomatoes so they could buy the dining room set they still have today.

Mum was there in the morning, at noon when we came home for lunch in public school (to grade 8) and after school. In high school she owned a gift shop and I would stop in on my way walking home from school and see what I or Robert had to do to start making supper. Perhaps that was a start of a culinary adventure for both if us.

My mother was a strong support for me during my life. She praised me and championed me. She never compared Robert and I. We were both special to her.

Mum and Dad had a way with people which was extraordinary. I think mum must have been one of those special people who made a connection easily because she had a genuine interest in people and had a lot of acquaintances. I have known only a few people who whenever you met them they made you feel special. My mother was also one of those people. Now I never noticed because she was my mother... But I know that other people felt it from her. Mum had friends from her youth right up to people she met recently. And it included store clerks, artisans and vendors at the local market, people they sat beside at church or at a concert. And our friends in high school and friends of ours from wherever we lived. For instance Mum connected with a woman I interned with in Saskatoon while they were travelling In Scotland. There are many friends of Robert's here today who our Mother has kept in touch with over the years and been invited to their parties.

I have spoken to many children of her friends (my age) who Mum had on her email and kept in touch with. They all commented on how special it was to be in touch with her, especially after their parents had died.

After Dad retired they moved to London and eventually moved to Halifax, NS. to be close to Robert and Anne. Mum was a proud Nana to Sarah, Sean and Emma. She was also thrilled to be Everett's Great Nana.

At the memorial service:

Brenda Ferris-Hyatt, niece, read 1st Corinthians 13: 1-13

Sarah MacDonald, granddaughter, read The 23rd Psalm

Words of Remembrance were given by son, Robert McKelvie, daughter, Anne McKelvie and granddaughter, Emma McKelvie

Emma spoke:

"Good morning. For those of you who don't know me, I'm Emma McKelvie. I'm here to share some memories of our Nana on behalf of my cousin Sarah, my brother Sean and myself.

The fact that we had Nana in our lives for as long as we did, is something we are all extremely grateful for. We all had our own special relationship with her.

Whenever we had a family dinner, or were gathered together, Nana always had our favorite drinks on hand. If she knew someone in particular was coming, she always had their favorite dinner or dessert made for them. She was always thinking of the likes & dislikes of others…She could always be heard remarking "I made this pie especially for Emma," or "I made this because I know it's Sean's favorite."

When we were out shopping with her, you had to be careful with what you said you liked, because no sooner had you made a comment about liking a particular item, then she was up at the counter payingfor it before you had time to protest. And she was more than happy to do it.

Incoming boyfriends/girlfriends were always put through a "hug test." If you liked hugs or were a good hugger you were "in." We knew that Nana showed her approval and her love through her hugs.

Nana was very proud of all of her grandchildren. She never passed up an opportunity to share our latest accomplishments or experiences. She was always eager to know what we were doing, and asked lots of questions to get all the details. On several occasions someone would ask me what I was doing, and before I had a chance to answer she would say "Emma is a teacher, and the best one around." Never mind that she had never seen me in action! It didn't matter what we were doing, she always believed in us, and knew we were capable of anything. She always joked that Sean was her #1 grandson....although he doesn't have much competition in that field!!!

One of the things my friends commented on most about our grandmother was her style. She was always dressed to the nines and always up on the latest fashion trends. Even when she was sick ,she knew the upcoming color for the spring, and had an outfit picked out and ready to wear. I know I've said many times "My grandmother is more stylish than me!"

Nana truly loved her family and all that life had to offer. She knew how to have a good time. She danced the night away at Sarah's wedding. She was always up for a game of cards or crokinole. And she even learned how to play washer toss this summer.

There are so many little things I will miss the most about Nana. Being able to call her up, and have a chat. To tell her about my day, to ask advice on a recipe, or for her to tell me a story from her past. It's hard for us to say goodbye but we know she is up there with Papa dancing the days away."

Anne spoke:

"Thank you all for being here today to honour and remember Doris McKelvie and help us celebrate the wonderful person she was and her life.

We are so pleased that Wayne and Brenda, two of our cousins on Mum's side of the family, are here. As well as, my Dad's brother, Uncle Bob, is here with our two cousins, Bill and Leanne. And a friend from my school, Randy is here. He is one of the many of our friends who was close to our parents, calling them Ma and Doc.

Family was what Mum valued the most. She was very loving and caring. A nurturing Mother, Nana and Great Nana Do and a devoted wife, daughter and cherished sister. Mum was a kind and thoughtful aunt and friend to many.

To start I'll state an obvious trait - Mum's sense of style. She was very interested in the latest styles and what was "in". And would have to shop until she found the fashion which you had to have, because, in her words it was "all the go!" This past summer it was a Jean jacket!

What you may not know /is that if Mum could have had her wish she would have gone to New York City to study fashion design....at which she would have excelled, I'm sure. Instead she created beautiful outfits and fine projects, without that training such as sewing wedding dresses, making hats, and covering shoes to match . She even had her own designer label ....Dore Jean....with an accent on the e!

Also, you may not know that Mum modelled in fashion shows in Essex and in London.

Robert spoke:

No one I knew growing up had parents that could throw a party like my mother. I was the bartender, underage of course, but....they often lasted well into the wee hours of the morning.

Doug playing the piano, "Roll out the Barrel, We'll have a Barrel of fun", "Five Foot Two, Eyes of Blue", ....my mother leading the sing song.

Much like her keen interest in fashion, she skill and creativity in the kitchen in many ways was unrivaled.

Always trying something new, always using nothing but the best of ingredients. She would often search far and wide for a little known or ethnic ingredient just so that she could follow the recipe correctly.

Anyone who came to our home for a meal of a visit knew what an ultimate hostess she was.

A friend wrote recently that they'll always remember Mom's in season peach pies and if you were lucky enough to have a piece you would feel the same , nothing quite like it.

Recipes that she had given to others to try never seemed to taste quite the same...since they used margarine instead of butter....or didn't have any almonds so left them out!!!

My tribute in some ways....I had a picture painted several years ago that still remains in her kitchen. A chef with a tall hat (who looks vaguely like me) in a big professional kitchen with a large brigade of staff, talking on the phone out of earshot from everyone and asking, "Mom, do you heat the oil up first before you fry the onions?"

Anne spoke:

I always told people that Mum was Martha Stewart long before MS was born.

One Christmas in Essex she had someone spray paint our evergreen tree black. Then she put on white lights and trimmed it with silver ornaments.

For over the fireplace Mum took a large sheet of plywood, spray painted it black and drilled some holes to insert a string of white lights, and she glued on a crescent moon spray painted silver. And voila she had a masterpiece...a night sky with stars to hang over the fireplace. Other Christmases it was a white tree with pink trim, or silver with blue lights and ornaments. (My friend Jim wrote," I remember walking through the front door and seeing silver, gold and blue lavishly adorning your living room. And I thought - whoa there was a different way to look at things rather than just the traditional way...a life lesson..."

Mum also made beautiful bows. A gift from Mum was expertly wrapped and adorned with a fancy bow...hand made especially for you. One such gift for my bridal showers was covered in a spray of individually made ribbon roses of varying sizes. It was a real work of art.

She always had an eye for colour and decorated our home with a flair. We'd come home after school and the living room would be changed around, or Robert and my bedrooms where switched, or mum had upholstered a chair or mum had painted a room. We always joked, dad could spill the paint taking the lid off the can and mum could paint a whole room in her good clothes and never spill a drop!

Later in London Mum learned to paint pictures and her home is filled with her lovely art work, watercolours, acrylics and oils.

Mum and dad had a way with people which was extraordinary. Mum showed a keen interest in everyone she met. I think it is a rare quality. And people who have written since mum died say how wonderful it was to have that connection with her. And a lot of these people are my age, and are the children of my parents' friends. Over the years, Several people claimed to be Mum's second daughter or son. She was also adopted as Canadian grandmother to others.

Mum was a shining example of good living. My friend Beth wrote

"What an inspiring spirited creative woman she was. I am so glad I had the opportunity to tell her how much she influenced my life: teaching me so much about having fun, cooking and baking with gusto and finesse, enjoying life, cultivating friendships, dressing well, having faith, singing and dancing whenever there was an opportunity. "

Robert spoke:

Mom was always ready for anything. If you called her up and asked if she would like to drive to Timbucktoo she'd quickly reply, "Give me 30 minutes to pack."

And she never put off anything that could be done right now. There is no time like the present.

And Mom certainly was not afraid to take a chance....judging by the way she used to sneak things back across the border from Detroit. Gorgeous satin material for a wedding dress she was making for someone was lain on the back seat of the car. "Oh, that is just a car blanket, Officer" Or somehow hiding my father's surgical instruments in her long mink coat which she would wear even when it was not the season for it.

And don't call me 'Bob", even though I was named after Uncle Bob. She would quickly inform you that, If I wanted to call him Bob...I would have named him Bob not Robert.

McKelvie's was Mom's favourite restaurant....surprise!...and she would never hesitate to tell anyone she met. I often thought that I should give unhappy customers, you know the ones you just can't satisfy, if they would like to discuss their dissatisfaction with my mother. That would be a conversation I would love to listen to.

My mother was an undefeated Golf Champ: she was the only female winner in the 40 year existence of the Fall Classic at the Highland Links.

She and my father made the annual trek to Ingonish for many years and regardless of the antics that took place it just made them want to return even more.

They just like to have fun which was in abundance in the place we fondly referred to as, "the kingdom of golf".

Mom's last golf game was this past September with Margie, Sean and I. We played 18 holes and throughout the game I kept telling her that she didn't have to play every shot. That didn't stop her from planning out every hole, much easier when Mom hits it down the middle every time!

She was competitive...a great curling skip, she enjoyed her share of bonspiels and was a master bridge player. She helped set up teams and make up draws for the Cremesse IWK bridge fundraiser.

Any game of euchre, crib, fish, crokinole you played against Mom....you'd better pay attention. She liked to win.

My mother maintained her great spirit right up until the end of her life. Still concerned about others, never complaining about her own circumstances. The hostess with the mostest.

Anne spoke:

And an era has died....a great time of love, acceptance, simplicity, and trying new things. Now....to do something to honour my mother. Let's...try to stay connected. .....be open to hearing what others have to say and take an interest and support them like my mother would. Mail a card to someone instead of just emailing. Or pick up the phone and make someone feel special that you took the time and you care about them. That will make Mum proud!

* * * * * * * * * *

McKelvie (Wakefield),Doris Jean. We, the family, are profoundly saddened to announce that our dear Mother passed away peacefully on Sunday, March 2, 2014, but know that she is reunited with her beloved Douglas.

Born November 23,1924 at home in Shelburne, Ontario she was the youngest daughter of the late Elma (Fowler) and George Wakefield, England.

Doris grew up in Shelburne, Ontario. She married Douglas McKelvie while she was in nurse's training at St. Joseph's Hospital in Toronto in 1947.

Mum was a loving and supportive wife and unforgettable mother who devoted her life to raising their family in Windsor, Stratford, Hensall and Essex, ON. Eventually they retired to London, ON and Halifax, NS.

Being highly organized and very efficient Mum managed the household with excellence and still had time for her own business, serving on various charity and service club executives and helping Dad manage his veterinarian practice office.

Artistic in home decor, entertaining and fashion, Mum had a flair for style and kept up with the times. Other passions were golf, curling and bridge.

Over Mum's life she gathered friends whom she kept in touch with regularly remembering their birthdays, anniversaries and special days. She always showed a genuine interest in their lives and was a supportive counsel to many resulting in being adopted as their "Ma" or Canadian grandmother.

Family was paramount for Mum and she was the best mother and most precious Nana Do. Mum was also a special Aunt to her many nieces, nephews and their families. Her memory will be deeply cherished and she will be terribly missed by her children and their families.

Predeceased by her beloved husband, Douglas, of 64 years and sisters Marguerite Ferris and Irene Exelby, sisters-in-law, Betty McKelvie, Barb McKelvie and brothers-in-law Jack McKelvie, Allan McKelvie and Howard Ferris.

Survived by son, Robert (Margaret Guy), daughter, Anne (John Jordan) and grandchildren, Sarah (David MacDonald), Sean (Lucy Medvedeva) and Emma (Sam Edmonds), and great-grandson, Everett.

Also by sister-in-law, Helen McKelvie, brothers-in-law, Donald Exelby and Robert McKelvie and many nieces and nephews and their families.

A service will be held on Saturday, March 8, 2014 in St. Peter's Anglican Church, 3 Dakin Dr., Halifax at 11 am. A reception will follow in the church hall.

By request, no flowers please. Memorial Donations can be made to St. Peter's Anglican Church, (3 Dakin Dr. , Birch Cove, Halifax, NS. B3M 2C9)

Or to the Music Therapy Program (c/o QEII Foundation, 1276 South Park Street, Centennial Bldg, Room 1-040, Halifax, Nova Scotia, B3H 2Y9, 902 473-7932)