Lillian Audrey Stephenson Woods

She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. She watches over the affairs of her household
 and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: “Many women do noble things,
 but you surpass them all.” Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.

[Proverbs 31:25-30 New International Version (NIV)]

Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.

[Matthew 5:4 New International Version (NIV)]

Having lived a vibrant and fulfilling life, Lillian Audrey Woods, a long-time Houston resident, went home to the Lord on December 8, 2015 at the age of 90. As many have shared with us, our mother was one of those individuals you remember, bright and full of personality. Born the youngest of three sisters and one brother, our mother was raised in Rochester, New York, before she moved South at the age of 20. Our Mom lost her own mother at the age of 10; her mother and father had previously separated. After living with her older siblings for a while, Audrey spent time living with an aunt and uncle. She also spent time being part of what became her life-long, friend-sister’s family. Alice was 14 months older.

Granted these experiences clearly influenced who our mother became. For us, however, her resiliency shouted out more notability. Our mother pushed through surgeries, stents, TIA’s, degenerative arthritis, a host of other heart concerns and what we understood to be age-related macular degeneration in one eye. Even as she-- and we-- recognized her own frailty after she turned 90, for exercise this “Sweeper Lady” was out at the crack of dawn sweeping her driveway and sidewalk from one street corner to the other. (So you know, while it was still a considerable amount to sweep, it was only a short block of three houses). Perhaps she was programmed to do so as a photo we found captured her shoveling snow?

Our mom also continued the daily feeding of her faithful --and what seemed like trained—wild birds of all kinds. We observed them hanging out on the power lines in the backyard awaiting her placement of seeds in the readily identifiable feeding spots. Those spots actually increased overtime as the word got out in the bird population. In fact, we were once taken aback when we heard pecking on the glass sliding doors by pigeons clearly announcing dinnertime.

Mother shared countless stories of her friendship with Alice that later expanded to include their husbands. One cherished story she relished in retelling was the time Alice and she set out to shop for Easter clothing separately. You see, when they went together they seemed to always want to get similar, if not the same, outfits. Okay, you clearly are way ahead of me, but, yes, they came back from shopping to show their purchases to one another and they had made the same selections! We don’t recall her telling us that either one of them made a return.

Speaking of shopping, you would definitely want to go with Audrey. She rarely paid full price for any item of clothing, shoes, or accessories. She’d spot something she wanted and patiently wait for the price to go down. My brother, dad, and I benefitted from that knack of patience and frugality. Seems the youngest granddaughter (although she doesn’t patiently wait to purchase) has that gene. Invariably her purchases seem to always ring up far less than the ticketed price.

Color coordination was key to Audrey as well. It is like she had the color wheel as a part of her DNA. And when you speak about shoes, we just knew her collection rivaled that of Imelda Marcos, former First Lady of the Philippines. Now we are not sure we will ever understand this—she loved starching clothes and ironing. To this day there was always something rolled up in the icebox awaiting her “just so” glide of her hands.

Over the years, we began to recognize that glint in her eye—something “just right” was about to happen and probably would become part of our routine. My first memory (my brother was almost 3 years younger) was when she got all dressed up and left us mid-day with a sitter to ride the bus to town. She always had something for each of us when she returned home. Or like when she would come get me from MYF (Methodist Youth Fellowship). My brother would be with her and we’d stop at the Carnation ice cream parlor, bringing home ice cream for all four of us. Or like on Saturdays when the regular, wholesome fare of fruit cup, vegetables, and meat and potatoes was replaced with something like milkshakes (made with a handheld mixer), bean soup and BLT’s.

Cooking and baking called our mother’s name. She volunteered almost anytime someone needed cookies, pies, cakes, and mastered the concept of bringing meals to a neighbor she perceived was in need. In retirement, she often said she made oatmeal and chocolate chip cookies -- with her signature solo pecan in the center-- for her husband. In reality, she was baking to give most of them away. During Hurricane Carla, mother opened her home to our block of the neighborhood as we had gas appliances—people needed that morning coffee! Later when she had grandchildren, she relished (no pun intended) in being able to pick them up from school with some kind of edible treat she had made. Later, when they could drive, she loved that they would drop by with a request for one of her sandwiches or a casserole to take back to college. Even now, the youngest granddaughter can taste the roast beef and ketchup sandwich; the oldest, her Nana’s tuna salad sandwich.

As so many grandmothers before her and so many grandmothers to come, Audrey was a doting Nana. She made a point, however, to ask about and use similar discipline measures as I did. Breakfast was the only complaint from the grandchildren when they stayed with Nana and Papa. Sleeping or not, Nana wanted her granddaughters at the breakfast table at the time she cooked breakfast. She did this, too, when we were home from college. Once you had breakfast you could go back to bed. Despite this downer, her granddaughters knew, they could count on Nana and Papa to be at as many of their recitals, school events, and award ceremonies as they could.

My brother and I recall the same as we grew up. Mom balanced home and work. She would make sure we were all on time for Sunday school and church. We attribute this to the fact she never missed an opportunity to work ahead and the characteristics of her being a Leo. After the evening dishes were done and the kitchen cleaned, she would set the morning table for the next day’s breakfast. She would ready the stove with the items she would need to cook-- eggs, bacon, toast or biscuits--everything perfectly timed for us to be outside when the school bus rolled up and for our parents to leave for work.

As many others during WWII, Audrey happened upon a 22 year-old man, Earl. While very time-bound when we were growing up, apparently that wasn’t always the case. Mom was to meet what was to become her Navy man husband under the clock at Grand Central Station at a certain time, but was late. Thank goodness for us their love-at-first sight attraction overcame her tardiness. We wonder if that was the first example of how Audrey could help you see and accept her way of thinking. In this instance, explaining why she was late.

With an ever-so brief courtship, she left Rochester and traveled alone by train to meet Earl in San Diego where they married. Somehow, even with the priority being the soldiers, our mother figured out a way to have that train ride. There is a scripture that most aptly reflects what my brother and I witnessed about their marriage: A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. [Proverbs 31:10-12 New International Version (NIV)]

Amidst the sorrow of her passing, there have been multiple uplifting experiences for us (and also the “say what/why” moments) in discovering our mother’s penchant for saving everything. These discoveries are now gifting us with new learning after all these years. She saved letters that she and dad wrote to one another during the war and those from anytime his job separated them. She did the same for both our college letters and letters from family and friends. We found her 1943 USO Hostess Organization card and her Brownie Troop and Cub Scout Troop leader cards. And, my-oh-my, the countless cards discovered that were addressed to her and saved from all occasions, including, of course, ones from her granddaughters. Like putting a puzzle together, each find has added a little more to the picture of our mother’s life. Certainly, we knew our parents deeply loved one another. We just had no idea the wealth of love so many others had for her. One Hallmark sentiment captured it best: I want to have your giving heart and be there for people as you have been there for me / I want to be wise like you and able to share advice in a gentle quiet way / Most of all I want to inspire faith in all things good wherever I go as you always have … as you always will.

We stumbled upon a telegram that told mom when to pick someone up at the train station named “Woody”. Okay—my brother and I know of only one man in her life—our dad—so naturally we wondered. Their love letters to one another revealed that “Woody” was our dad. Never knew that! Never knew that mom was in Texas only two months after they wed. A postcard, dated 12/12/45, clued us in about mom’s spunkiness. Since she had had no idea when she was going to be arriving at various points on her journey to the Texas home of her husband’s parents and his youngest sister (whom she had never met), she had no way to tell his family when she was coming. On the postcard she simply wrote, …so I’ll just politely walk in on the folks. Apparently, too, she dated the drummer in Frank Sinatra’s band because she was more interested in him than Frank Sinatra? No way to verify, but it makes for a good Audrey story.

With her move to the South there is no shortage of humorous stories for this transplanted Yankee about her getting used to Southern ways and appropriate pronunciations. One we highly prized learning is when she told us that she was eating in a diner and asked for “pee can” pie. Per her storytelling, the waitress told mom they didn’t have that, but they did have a facility she could use and pointed to the restroom. Following the laughter, the waitress did offer mom pecan pie from the menu.

Because most of Audrey’s large, extended family is in New York, my brother and I benefitted from learning about many cities and states. Our summer vacation road trips to New York had varied routes, affording us many sightseeing opportunities and history lessons, even if only a quick drive-by. My brother and I both remember mom would make lunches on each driving day, up and back. Dad would find a spot, usually with a picnic table, and we would have lunch. We also learned lessons about organization and attending to many things at once. As the years have unfolded, we recognize how much more enriched our lives have been because this Yankee woman and Southern boy met and fell in love with one another.

The minute our mother cared about you, she only had one speed and approach--full-throttle, heart-felt caring. One apt scripture seemingly captures what we witnessed: This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters. If anyone has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person? Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth. [1 John 3:16 -18 New International Version (NIV)]. Our mom taught us to consider the underdog for overlooked strengths. Perhaps this is why my brother and I, including the grandchildren, see multiple sides of “a something” before making a choice.

When Alice died, mom often lamented she was the only one left, referencing the death of her husband, her own siblings and those of her husband’s. Audrey was really never alone until our father passed away almost two years ago. Even then her loving neighbors, some for 50 years, surrounded her like guardian angels. These neighbors fondly and protectively watched over her. Their loving action enabled us, her children, to honor our mother’s desire to live in her home for as long as prudently possible. Her weekly visits to the hairdresser provided yet another support. Coupled with her neighbors and hairdresser are the countless friends who checked in on her from time to time, including those from her many years of volunteering at Memorial City Memorial Hermann Medical Center after she retired as payroll administrator.

As independent as she had been all her life, she was lonely after dad’s passing. That’s when my brother and I realized that our mother had truly never ever lived by herself. According to His plan, she was ready to be called home to the Lord. Her deep conviction in the Lord grounded our family and sustains us now (see The Church and Society at the conclusion of this narrative): My son, keep your father’s commandment, and do not forsake your mother’s teaching. Bind them always on your heart; fasten them around your neck. When you walk, they will guide you; when you sleep, they will watch over you; when you awake, they will speak to you. [Proverbs 6:20-22 New International Version (NIV)]

Throughout her 90 years, she maintained a zest for life and kept offering pearls of wisdom such as the one she most recently told her oldest grandchild: If it is not worth hurting your foot by kicking the toilet, then it is not worth worrying about.

Her family and friends will greatly miss her sparkle and caring spirit.

*******

Seems only fitting that the following handwritten note was found in one of Audrey’s recipe files--for surely she built our family life on this “recipe” of understanding:

The Church and Society

The church has a place in every society—in politics, business, the classroom, the hospital, houses of detention, Skid Row, the elite, the downcast and the outcast. All of these are the concerns of the body of Christ--which is the church.

The spirit of Jesus Christ should be taught and practiced, spread into every society and not just confined to the church building.

When we believe Christ is our Savior, and we are loyal to the church, which is the body of Christ, then we will not be swayed by total sin of any variant bidding for our loyalty,

~Author unknown

Visitation will be held at 9:00 a.m. on Friday, December 18th at Waltrip Funeral Directors, where funeral services, led by Rev. Dr. Scott Endress of Chapelwood United Methodist Church, will begin in the chapel at 10:00 a.m. Graveside services will follow at 1:00 p.m. at Houston National Cemetery.

In lieu of flowers, the family requests a donation in Audrey’s name to the Volunteer Service Scholarship Fund at Memorial Hermann Memorial City Medical Center, 12335 Kingsride Ln #137 Houston, TX 77024 (713) 242-3832.

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