Pauline Annie Hicks

THE FOUR SEASONS

Prelude – Four Seasons

We must live through the weary winter,

If we would value the Spring,

And the woods must be cold and silent,

Before the robins sing.

The flowers must be buried in darkness,

Before they can bud and bloom.

And the sweetest and warmest sunshine,

Comes after the storm and gloom.

So the heart from the hardest trial,

Gains the purest joy of all.

And from the lips that have tasted sadness,

The sweetest songs will fall.

For as peace comes after suffering,

And love is reward of pain,

So, after earth, comes heaven,

And out of our loss, the gain.

Author unknown

Cinemas, automobiles, radios and airplanes! Bootleggers, booze, flappers and jazz! The twenties seemed to usher in a new modern age. After the ordeal of the First World War, people were eager to enjoy life in the 1920s and a number of new inventions added to the excitement.

In 1916, women in Manitoba won the right to vote with Ontario followed in 1917. In 1929 women were declared “persons”. What an eventful decade! It started off with a bang ending the first year of this decade with the birth of sweet baby girl Pauline Annie Hinds……… on Thursday, December 2, 1920. The Great War was two years into history and the Roaring Twenties were under way. By the time Pauline was nine years old, the Roaring was silenced and the Great Depression hung like a black cloud over the country and the world. Edward and Jean Hinds were starting their lives together in the last years of The Great War. They started their family in Amhurst Nova Scotia against a backdrop of tragedies and uncertain times. It was in December of 1918 that the infamous “Halifax Explosion” rocked the province effecting lives of families everywhere for all time. Approximately 2,000 people were killed by debris, fires, and collapsed buildings, and an estimated 9,000 others were injured. This was not the anticipated end of World War 1.

Not everyone was roaring in the early years of this decade. Maritimers were rapidly falling behind central Canada economically. Unemployment was high. This was the world into which Pauline was born.

Welcome, My name is Nancy Reimer. I am honoured to be the funeral celebrant today as we mourn and celebrate together the long life of this amazing woman Pauline Hicks. The music you were listening to before the service started is Vivaldi’s The Four Seasons. We have entered a season of sorrow to mourn the death of Pauline but also to celebrate and give thanks for the many years she was gifted to us. . I am sure that you would like to join me in saying to Pauline’s daughter Donna, grandchildren Kristine, Bill and Becky and to her great grandchildren that you are in our thoughts and prayers because of your loss. Although you are grateful for her long life, her death represents the end of an era, the loss of the matriarch and the connection to your past and to your heritage. We want to be available to you in any way possible as you face this season of grief.

We also remember Pauline’s grandchildren who couldn’t be here with us today in the sacred space: Cleve, Todd, Terry Clint, Clayton and Clark.

May I express the family’s gratitude for your presence here today. In seasons of grief, nothing takes the place of friends. Your presence helps the family realize how valuable Pauline was to others and reveals the significance of her life.

“A funeral is not a day in a lifetime. It is a lifetime in a day.”

Today is Pauline’s day. She earned her time in the sun. She wouldn’t be comfortable with all the attention, however. Although she was happiest when surrounded by her friends and especially her family, she didn’t want to be the focus of attention. We need to make this her most special time, honouring her life, standing in awe at her heart, her tenacity, her generosity and her wonder. We will breath together the sighs of sadness that she is gone and joyful whispers that she was a part of your life. We will hear some of the stories of her life, and be touched by words from her family, and hear the music of her heart.

The Human Seasons - John Keats

Four seasons fill the measure of the year;

There are four seasons in the mind of Man:

He has his lusty Spring, when fancy clear

Takes in all beauty with an easy span:

He has his Summer, when luxuriously

Spring's honeyed cud of youthful thought he loves

To ruminate, and by such dreaming high

Is nearest unto heaven: quiet coves

His soul has in its Autumn, when his wings

He furleth close; contented so to look

On mists in idleness -to let fair things

Pass by unheeded as a threshold brook: -

He has his Winter too of pale misfeature,

Or else he would forgo his mortal nature.

John Keats says of the spring time of our lives that we take in the beauty of spring and become youthful and we dream of our futures. I’m certain Pauline would have been dreaming of a better future for herself with a husband and children as she and her family lived through the ‘Dirty Thirties’ as they came to be called. By the time the thirties were well on their way, the Hinds family had left the tragedies and hardships of Nova Scotia behind and made a life for their family here in St. Catharines. Pauline was now in the Summer Season of her life. According to the poet Keats, summer is the best time in our lives, we are still young, but, we “ruminate thoughts”, that is, we have had some experience and we are able to think about what we did in our childhood. Through these thoughts men can be totally happy, “unto heaven”. As Pauline thought about her childhood and looked into her future, she knew it was time for independence, to enter the workforce and soon start a family of her own.

Pauline was working at Thompson Products at this time. Another employee of TRW was about to enter her life and change it forever. It was here that Cleve Harper spotted this pretty and petite woman and eventually gathered up his courage and invited her for a date! Cleve courted Pauline, winning her heart, a courtship that lasted the next 46 years.

Traditions were a lot different back in the thirties and Pauline would have been living at home while working and bringing her pay cheques home to her mother. That’s just the way it was done. Certainly no fun for a young working woman whose fancies were focused on fashion and fun. In 1938 at the young age of 18, Pauline eloped with the love of her life. There was a no nepotism rule at Thomson so that was the end of Pauline’s career and pay cheques going home to mother. (she secretly kept her last pay cheque thinking what a devious and delightful secret she kept from her mother). This pay cheque would certainly be needed for this young couple to start their lives together.

While Cleve was courting his soon to be bride, they likely danced to the music of Fred Astaire, Bing Crosby and the Benny Goodman Orchestra. This was the era of the Big Band Music. They would have gone to ‘moving pictures” to see everyone’s favourite child Shirley Temple in “Captain January” and “Poor Little Rich Girl”. Pauline was probably swooning over the handsome stars of the day, Cary Grant and Erol Flynn. She would have laughed at the clown Charlie Chaplin has he entertained and wowed the world with his last movie (still a silent movie) “Modern Times”

As Cleve and Pauline travelled through the summer of their lives, they were adding babies to the journey. In 1941, their son Gary was a new edition followed a few years later by their daughter Donna. They now had a ‘millionaires’ family.

They slowed things down a bit and later Butch would join this happy family in 1951. This family started out their lives in a house on Geneva Street just south of the highway. Then in about 1956, they moved their home on Gen Park Road where Pauline would spend the next 44 years living through the summer, fall and winter of her life.

Pauline and Cleve were entering the fall of their lives. According to Keats, autumn includes spiritual experiences. In this stage human beings are mature, their tiredness is reflected in their acts. The words used are calm and relaxing: What the poet tries to express is that we have to admit that we are getting old, we have to be satisfied of our deeds and we just let time pass by. Pauline by this time was content. She could look back on her life with satisfaction for the most part and witness the legacy she had created. We mothers give birth, raise our children to be strong and independent but then comes the hardest part. We have to let them go. I can only imagine how difficult and painful it would have been for Pauline when her first born son exercised his strength and independence, used the life skills his mother and father had taught him, and left safety and security of home and family, and joined the American Navy. Gary made a life for himself, married and started a family of his own. The difficult and sad part of this for Pauline was that this life was in Utah. This would break any mother’s heart.

With Donna in Montreal and Gary in Utah, that left Butch and his wife Leanne and family close by right here in St. Catharines. Bill and Becky became the lucky grandchildren who would get to spend weekend sleepovers with Grandpa and Nana. So many wonderful memories were created during those years.

A mother becomes a true grandmother the day she stops noticing the terrible things her children do because she is so enchanted with the wonderful things her grandchildren do. ~Lois Wyse

Going to Nana’s place sounds to me from the stories I’ve heard, like going to a carnival. They had a big back yard, an oasis in the city as seen through the children’s eyes. There was always so much to do that would entertain young minds. In the summer, there was endless wonderful barbeques, a kiddies pool set up on the lawn, there were swing sets, croquet sets and even Go-Carts to be driven. Indoors held even more treasures and adventures. Grandpa and Nana had a ‘rec room’! They even had a pool table. This room was a treasure trove in itself. Bill told me there was lots going on at Nana’s all the time. Then there was Gary’s old bedroom. It was filled with toys waiting for them just as they had left them the previous weekend. It was a home away from home. Pauline actually kept those toys and that toy room in tact and so it was when the great grandchildren started coming around, the magic happened all over again.

There was more to Cleve and Pauline then just family and grandchildren however. There was much more. They had pet names for each other for one thing Pauline called Cleve Father, while he simply gave her the name “short”. They shared and enjoyed so many wonderful days out on the golf course with all the extra amenities and friendships that come with membership to a golf club. Winters weren’t spent sitting around the fireplace either. There was bowling and bowling trophies. I guess most if not all of her grandchildren have some of these proudly earned trophies now. From all of these activities come the bonus at the end of season – the banquets! Cleve and Pauline never missed a chance to attend any of these banquets. This allowed them to re-live the joy of their youth but with the knowledge and appreciation of being in the fall of their life. The banquets meant great food and best of all, dancing! They were still enjoying the ‘dance of life’ in every sense of the words.

I’m sure Pauline would have wished for this dance to last forever but Cleve had entered the winter of his life before his dance partner, his golfing and bowling partner, his life partner had reached hers. How difficult it must have been for Pauline when she had to let go of Cleve’s hand and in 1984 bid him a final farewell.

Pauline was a petite bit of a woman but you were not to be deceived by her diminutive size. She was a force. She was tough and she was a survivor. Pauline was after all, a product of the depression and a war. Now 64 years old, she was alone for the first time in her life and was now faced with learning new skills and a new way of living. She had to learn the business of running a household, paying the bills and all the maintenance involved in keeping up the house and yard……and she did just that.

She made a life for herself. Pauline was a survivor. For all the joy and successes she had in her life however, she had more than her measure of heartache. Pauline endured the loss of her husband and in her lifetime, the loss of every one of her siblings. She was the sole survivor of that happy and close family from Amhurst Nova Scotia. But Pauline had her friends. Her active lifestyle and warm nature won her lifelong and devoted friends – and of course, she had her children and grandchildren.

“More people than ever before are crossing the line into senior citizenship and I see them being intensely curious about how to make it work, how to do it better than their parents or grandparents. These are Baby Boomers, the generation who once screamed, ‘Hope I die before I get old.’ That line should be rewritten, ‘Hope I die before I feel old.’ That is the crux of the matter.” (from Keep Moving) – Dick van Dyke

….And keep moving she did. Pauline and her best friend Teresa became a Thelma and Louise of their time. Well, maybe they weren’t robbing banks and driving off the ends of cliffs but they sure did a lot of travelling and driving around. They took trips to Florida and several other driving trips and in general were just chumming around and enjoying themselves. Pauline liked to earn a little pocket money and took on a few baby sitting jobs for the working mothers in the neighbourhood. Pauline was even ‘hot rodding’ around in her brand new Sunfire. Unfortunately, she had a couple of reality checks along the way. One day she was kicking the garage door shut when she slipped and fell and broke her wrist. That slowed her down a bit. She was 87 when this happened. Another humbling event happened when she lost control of her Firebird while reaching for something falling in the car . She drove over a ditch and up onto the neighbour’s lawn. This time she scared herself and for the first time, actually thought about the fragility of her body and her age. She was on the cusp of the winter of her years.

Previous to these mishaps, she of course remained active and enjoyed a great social life. Pauline was active in the Dunlop Seniors’ Centre and the Russell Avenue Community Centre. She enjoyed these two great ‘hangouts’, playing cribbage and euchre and meeting new people. In around 1995, she caught the eye of another member of the Seniors’ Centre. Without realizing it, she had enchanted this a man named Roy Hicks. Roy’s charms and kind nature won Pauline over and they married and enjoyed a new chapter of their lives together. Pauline was about 75 at this time. Roy treated Pauline like a Princess. No wonder she was so charmed. She earned this time to be fussed over and a little spoiled. Roy was a good man and they enjoyed ten happy years together. Once again, Pauline found herself saying a final goodbye and closing yet another chapter of her life.

As the years passed, Pauline seemed to quickly enter the winter of her life. Keats said about winter that death just happens once, it is everybody’s destiny and nobody can run away from it. The mortal nature of men is described in his poem as “pale misfeature”. At this time in the seasons of her life, Pauline was developing dimentia. There are sometimes hidden blessings hiding behind the dark clouds. Pauline was thus spared the reality of the terrible twist of fate that would claim her two sons. Gary and Butch died within months of each other in 2013 certainly a cross too heavy to bear for any mother. She was blessedly oblivious to these sad and unjust events. “Short” was now in the winter of her life.

………………….words from Pauline’s grandson Bill

Pauline was most certainly a special woman. She lived in her own home of 44 years up until a couple of years ago. She made yet another adjustment to her life and moved into Heidehoff. This was fine by her as it meant new friends and new adventures. She was unique indeed. Pauline was just a few days short of her 95th birthday when she died on Nov. 28th Her birthday was on Monday of this week. Will Rogers said “Eventually you will reach a point where you will stop lying about your age an start bragging about it”. Pauline had certainly earned bragging rights.

Nana was a gentle and loving woman. Going to her home always meant good times. Good times and great memories. I will end this sacred time together by reading some words from Pauline’s daughter:

“In the quiet peace of your prayers, may the spirit of eternal Grace find you and surround you in the comfort of His Holy Love. May the Lord be especially close to you now’….Your daughter Donna

………………………recessional (listen to first several lines before exiting for the cemetery)

* * * * * * * * * *

Hicks, Pauline (Harper nee Hinds)

Passed away at Heidehof Home on Saturday, November 28th, 2015 at 94 years of age. Loving wife of her late husbands Roy Hicks (1995) and Cleve Harper (1984). Dear mother of Donna Harper. Predeceased by her sons Gary (Marva) and Butch (Gail, Leanne). Missed by her grandchildren Cleve, Kristine, Todd, Bill, Becky, Terry, Clint, Clayton and Clark. Fondly remembered by her many nieces and nephews and extended family. Predeceased by her parents, Edward and Jean and all of her siblings of Amherst, Nova Scotia.

Many would probably recall the fun times up north or the countless barbeques in the back yard. Pauline also enjoyed golfing, bowling, playing cribbage and euchre. She loved going dancing at the many banquets attended. In her later years, Pauline made many friends at Dunlop Senior Centre and Russell Avenue Community Centre. A very special thank you to Renee Harper and the staff at Heidehof for their kindness.

Cremation to take place, with a Celebration of her life to be held at the HULSE & ENGLISH FUNERAL HOME & CHAPEL, 75 Church St., St. Catharines, Ontario (905-684-6346)on Friday, December 4th, 2015 at 2pm with a memorial visitation period two hours prior to service time. Interment to take place in Pleasantview Memorial Gardens. Online tributes may be made at www.hulseandenglish.com