When we found out we were going to be having a fourth boy at home, we panicked a bit. It felt like we were stretched so thin with the three we had, and worried we wouldn't be able to give him the amount of love and attention a new baby deserves. We were wrong. Evan filled our hearts even fuller than ever, and while our hands were also very full, it didn't matter. He was so perfect.
Evan's personality shone bright, just like his beautiful eyes. He quickly became the center of attention, no matter where he was. He loved so fiercely, grabbing our cheeks to give us the biggest and best kisses he could. He was always the first to come running to the door for a hug when Daddy got home from work, and was always Mommy's first hug and kiss in the mornings. He was so fast. Oftentimes we would catch him with his brothers, doing things we never thought a baby his age could do. Nobody could tell him he couldn't do something. He would quickly prove you wrong if you thought so, despite being so small. He loved to climb, slide, and jump on the trampoline with his big brothers. If he fell, he would laugh, get up, and do it over, again and again. He loved his cousins, brothers and sister very much. Anything they were doing, he was right behind. If we were on a video call with his oldest two siblings, he was always trying to take the phone, kiss them, point to them and say "Bubba" and "Sissy". Lincoln was his right hand man, Mason his twin, and Gavin his protector.
He learned to say brother, and he said it often. He knew so many words, and could even sing his favorite kids song, 'Baby Shark'. More of his favorite words were Mama, Daddy, Nanny, No, Naughty, Hi, Bye Bye, Ball, and mommy's favorite Go Away. He was full of personality. He loved listening to music with Mommy and Daddy, always dancing and singing along. Evan experienced so many new things. He visited the zoo, science museum, aquarium and countless parks. He went camping, fishing, and swimming in the lake. He visited the beach and had so much fun. He was simply extraordinary in every way.
We admire him because we've lived with a sense of fear that he truly never knew; absolutely fearless. We can only hope to be as brave and free spirited as he was. He has forever changed our lives in so many ways that we still haven't realized them all. There is no greater joy in the world than remembering his cutest smile with his chubby teeth and big, icy blue eyes, and no greater sadness than not having him here with us. It's not fair, and while we will never know why we had to lose our perfect, whole baby, we know it's not for us to understand. We take comfort in knowing he was doing what he thought was so fun.
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