Carrie Jo-Marie Sheppard

Jo-Marie was a daughter, a sister, a wife, a mother, a friend, but mostly Jo-Marie was her own person. She was the first born and only daughter to Carrie and Pat Sweeney of Middleton, the older sister to brothers Hugh and Mike. I learned of her young life through the many visits to my grandparents home where I would pour over the photo albums and marvel at her glamour, athletic accomplishments, and wide circle of friends. No doubt unusual for the era, her love of sport and competition - playing and watching – was passed on from her mother. I recently found her grade 6 yearbook, for which she was co-editor and her music books - talents not showcased in those albums, unlike her high school days at Middleton Regional and her sport participation (basketball, volleyball, track and field, swimming) that also appeared on the local sport pages. Her two best friends from those days, Sheila and Maxine stayed lasting and true.

With secretarial credentials earned at Mount Allison University, Jo-Marie moved to Halifax, embarking on her career with Backman Advertising. In Sept. 1956 at age 19 Jo-Marie married Richard MacKay, a musician in the Navy's Stadacona Band. I was born five years later. Early family years and memories included camping, boating at Rockingham Yacht Club, and A&W onion rings. A woman ahead of her time, Jo-Marie continued to work. With the dissolution of her marriage in the early 70s, this engagement in the workforce shifted in its meaning and significance. The two of us grew up together during this time of many challenges. Independence was learned and earned. Everyday we took the bus together, she to work at the Dept. of Finance, and I to school at the “Convent” and before we left each morning Jo would chant "keys, tickets, money, pills" ensuring I would have keys to get in, bus tickets to get home, a dime for an emergency phone call, and my medication. Her valuing of education ensured that I remained at the Sacred Heart where she was often the sole spectator at a high school girls basketball game. I'd hear her yell to me "shoot" and I’d trust her eye for a good shot (although I am certain mine didn’t go in as often as hers did). Dedicated sports fans, we travelled to Montreal for the 1976 Olympics, staying with her brother Mike and Glenna in Ottawa and commuting daily to the sport venues. It was a dream trip for us both. Raising one teenage daughter on her own should have been more than enough but when my childhood friend's family was moving to Ontario before she finished high school, Debbie moved in with us. Debbie called Jo-Marie "Ma #2".

As Debbie and I headed off to Acadia, Wayne was becoming a constant companion to Jo-Marie. They enjoyed visiting us at Acadia and attending weekend football games. In March 1981 Jo-Marie and Wayne were married in Middleton at her parent’s home. They travelled to the Bahamas, the first of many trips together, and happened upon a Superstars competition of professional athletes competing in their nonprofessional sports. It was a sport fan's dream - mom collected autographs from Mike Schmidt and Lynn Swan, among others. They continued their active lives playing tennis and golfing at Oakfield Golf and Country Club and Eden in the Annapolis Valley. Wayne introduced Jo-Marie to the beauty and warmth of Newfoundland and a welcoming family that included his young daughter Cindi. They continued to follow my university career and enjoyed trips to Texas and Illinois and much bigger football stadiums for those Saturday games! A Florida trip to visit with her greatly admired “Uncle Gerry”, and relaxing with Wayne while meeting local characters in Galveston were happy vacation memories. Jo-Marie also travelled on her own to visit me in Alberta where she had her first view of the rockies before then travelling to BC to see her brother Hugh, for years separated geographically but never in their hearts. One of Jo-Marie's last solo trips was to Winnipeg where I was working at the University of Manitoba. We then set off together on a road trip to Champaign Illinois for my convocation, meeting Wayne there on arrival. With no reservations, no air conditioning, no set agenda, and side trips to hike up scenic look-offs - it was the best kind of road trip. This was three years after her scleroderma diagnosis. Jo-Marie and those close to her knew there was something wrong long before the diagnosis, which ended her career but not her determination for an active engaged life. She continued to resist the ravages of a little known disease.

Wayne was her co-conspirator in this resistance. When many of us would have relented, they persisted and insisted on carrying on with life as usual, seeing their friends regularly, as well as continuing to travel to celebrate anniversaries, weddings, and visiting friends and family across the country and province. Certainly the numerous Newfoundland journeys and the hospitality of Wayne's family, Kevin and Carol and Roz and Walter were highlights as Jo-Marie so enjoyed being out on the water and by the ocean. While there was no ocean in Winnipeg, we always managed to get to a lake or a take a riverboat ride. When Jo-Marie's words left her, Jennifer constantly reassured me there was no doubt she still was very much in the moment and communicated with her expressive eyes. In recent years, the trip radius got smaller but still included an almost ritualistic sojourn to the Mid-Valley Motel for lunch with Mike and Glenna, who so thankfully retired to Nova Scotia, and her mother Carrie, who in her nineties finally decided going out was easier than cooking.

I held my mother’s hand as she wept for her mother just one year ago.

Jo-Marie, a woman as unique as her name

a mass of contradictions, juxtapositions

strong weak

dependent independent

fearless afraid

alone social

soft tough

troubled carefree

active still

Jo-Marie

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SHEPPARD, Carrie Jo-Marie (Sweeney) – of Halifax, N.S. passed away December 4, 2011 at Maplestone Enhanced Care one day shy of her 75th Birthday, with her husband Wayne by her side. Born in Middleton, she was the daughter of the late Pat and Carrie Sweeney. Jo-Marie graduated from Middleton Regional High School, attended Mount Allison University, and began her professional career in advertising and finished it with the provincial government finance department. Jo-Marie was active throughout her life and played competitive basketball, softball, and enjoyed all sports. She particularly loved swimming, being on the water, traveling, and more recently golf and tennis. It was a bitter irony for her to be diagnosed with scleroderma in 1991. Although her physical activity was curtailed, she and Wayne kept up their social contacts until this September. She is survived by her husband of 30 years Wayne Sheppard, daughter Dr. Kelly MacKay (Dr. Jennifer Mactavish), Toronto Ont., brother Hugh (Barbara) Sweeney, Chilliwack, B.C., brother Ret. Col. Michael (Glenna) Sweeney, Centreville, N.S., step-daughter Cindi (Charles) Shirley, Sackville, N.S., nieces Leigh, Denise and Erin. Arrangements have been entrusted to J.A. Snow Funeral Home, 339 Lacewood Dr., Halifax (902) 455-0531. Visitation will be held at the funeral home on Thursday, December 8th from 2-4pm. Memorial service will be held on Friday, December 9th at 2:00pm. Cremation has taken place. A private interment will follow at a later date in Pinegrove Cemetery, Middleton, N.S. In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to a charity of your choice. Thanks to the staff at Maplestone and special thanks to her home care worker Brenda. On-line condolences may be sent by visiting: www.jasnowfuneralhome.com