Marilyn Gomeau

Marilyn Lowe Gomeau was born in St. Louis, Missouri, on August 8, 1946, to Lucille and Buster Adams. At the time, Marilyn’s father was playing centerfield for the St. Louis Cardinals as they made their run for the National League pennant that year.

After Buster retired from baseball, the family moved to Indio, California. Soon, the family grew and Marilyn found herself the babysitting older sister to two brothers, John and Jim. Marilyn attended and graduated from Indio High School in 1964, the same year the Beatles made their first trip to the United States.

After graduation, Marilyn found a job as a lab technician at a doctor’s office in Palm Desert. But Marilyn did not settle down to a quiet life among sand dunes and cactus. She was a product of her generation and embraced the music and culture of the 1960s, often driving for hours to attend rock concerts. One of her greatest memories was seeing Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, and Jefferson Airplane perform at the 1967 Monterey Pop Festival. She was, in the words of Bob Seger, “a dark haired beauty, with big dark eyes.”

After working in Palm Desert for more than a decade, Marilyn decided it was time to move closer to the coast, and she soon secured a job with Dr. Lucas Bonagura, MD, a gastroenterology specialist attached to Tri-City Hospital. Marilyn rented a house in Carlsbad and was happy to exchange desert heat for a little marine layer. Little did she know at the time, but she would work for Dr. Bonagura for the next 35 years.

Marilyn saved her money and eventually bought a small house on a hill in Vista, overlooking Eucalyptus Avenue. In the spring of 1980, Marilyn met Philip Gomeau on a blind date at the Vista Entertainment Center, where they were supposed to go dancing. Phil said that she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. They dated for five years, entertaining friends at the house on Eucalyptus Avenue and building a menagerie of pets that included dogs and cats and birds.

Just before Thanksgiving, 1986, Phil and Marilyn decided to get married. They didn’t want an elaborate wedding, and they didn’t want to wait. So they gathered up their friends and relatives and flew everyone out to Las Vegas. On December 5, 1986, they all squeezed into the famous “Little White Chapel” and within an hour or so, Phil and Marilyn were married.

As part of the Gomeau family, Marilyn gained a brother-in-law, Patrick, and two sisters-in-law, Therese and Michele.

Rather than go on a honeymoon, Phil and Marilyn began looking to buy a new house. Ultimately, they found the perfect lot on El Pajodo in Vista and built their own home. With two large yards to work with, Marilyn developed a love of gardening; and her flowers – especially her orchids – were stunning. About this same time, Marilyn’s friend Barbara Bochover introduced her to a special breed of cat – the Tonkinese – that craves human contact. Marilyn and Phil immediately bought two of them, Samson and Delilah, to go along with the feral cats they had adopted from the neighborhood. Later, Marilyn would bring two other Tonkinese into the house, Willow and Azul.

In their 26 years of marriage, Marilyn and Phil enjoyed spending time with their friends and family, traveling to Hawaii and Mexico, and going to Thorton Winery in Temecula to see jazz bands like Hiroshima and Spiro Gyra.

Everything Marilyn did, she did with precision, taste, and class – from picking out clothes to selecting wine, from making a flower arrangement to buying art and furniture. Few people were more lovingly fascinated by the natural world, the world of hummingbirds and exotic cats, of cymbidiums and viceroy butterflies. Her yard was not so much a garden as a biosphere. Everything grew there. And Phil was always there to help tend to whatever she planted.

In 2011, Marilyn retired from Dr. Bonagura’s office, leaving behind scores of colleagues who had become friends. Marilyn fell ill in 2012, and after a brave fight passed away on August 5, 2013.

She is survived by her husband Philip; her brothers Jim Adams and John Adams; and the many friends and relatives who loved her.

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Philip was the love of her life, and she his. Her kindness and beauty were indelible, unforgettable. She made life better for every person she knew and every creature she touched. We all will miss her.

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In lieu of flowers, donations may be made in Marilyn's memory to her favorite charity: Feral Cat Coalition, 9528 Miramar Rd., PMB 160, San Diego, CA 92126, (619) 758-9194, www.feralcat.com