Idalis Thillet

On the passing of our beloved Idalis Thillet July 28, 2019. Born on July 15, 1933, in Ponce, Puerto Rico, she was married to Manuel Toro predeceased in 1975. She was known as Tata, Mami, Mama, Abuela, Titi, “hermana”, “co-madre’, and friend. She had six children and is survived by three, Julio, Letty and Mayra. Heaven is having “tremenda fiesta” as she reunites with her first child she lost when he was an infant, and her dearest Epi and Nydia. Her fourteen grandchildren are Robby, Cindy, Eddie, Julio, Arthur, Albert, Johanique, Johan, Ariel, Genesis, Danny, Cesar, Gennifer and her namesake Idalis. Six great grandchildren: Saliyah, Aniya, Bella, Phoenix, Finn and Grayson. And blessed great-grandchild Parker. She loved all her sons-in-law and daughters-in-law regardless of some status of divorce: Diane, Paige, Krista, Kayla, John, Manny, Artie, Tito, Joanne and Dan.

She had only one sister. These two sisters built a large family for us. Her sister Hilda and her husband Milton were her best friends and she loved her nieces and nephews as if they were her own: Edna, Luis, Betsy, Lissy, Angel and Milton. We pretty much spent every weekend together. Picture a house with twelve to fifteen kids around at one time...all the time. Because every weekend was somebody’s birthday, anniversary, wedding, baptism, baby shower or holiday...occasions she loved to celebrate with her zest for the joy in living.

We learned so much from her throughout her 86 years with us. We learned to curse bilingual. We learned to love our Puerto Rican heritage through food, music, dance and history. We learned that public displays of affection are mandatory and hand shaking is for other people...not us. Her recipes for “arroz con gandules”, “pasteles”, “pernil” and “coquito” are our family heirlooms. Her parties are our dropbox of memories. Three o’clock “es la hora del cafe”, hot...very, very hot and fresh. We learned telenovelas, all the latest celebrity gossip and her political stance as a staunch Democrat and lifelong “Palmista”. She had an opinion on everything and never hesitated saying exactly what she wanted. She was always well dressed with full makeup and a lady’s attire.

She played many roles. She sewed clothes in a NYC sweatshop and was chairlady of her local ILGWA labor union. Her activism saw her throwing punches at protests, and labor strikes. We learned one never becomes a scrub or disrespects by crossing a picket line. She was precinct captain for the first ever, person of color Congresswoman Shirley Chisholm. Later she went back to school and became a Certified Nurse Assistant. She retired from the bakery at Winn-Dixie from which she had us all stocked with fresh bread.

She loved to send greeting cards long after e-cards became the trend and loved long conversations on the phone...never texting. Many will miss her frequent phone calls. We learned one should always have a clean house and plenty of food in case “visita” showed up. Her idea of a vacation was going somewhere not to see the sights, but to visit the home of each and every friend or family member possible.

We are sending her off her with the ashes of her daughter Nydia along with a spoon so she can start her next pot of “arroz con gandules” and a shot glass for her next sip of Don Q rum.

Her motto was strangers are just friends you haven’t met yet. Her door was always open for anyone at anytime. Generosity was her way of emitting the abundance of love inside her. She would rather sacrifice and go without than know there was someone in need. Her legacy is in each and every one of us lucky enough to have known her, for you walked away knowing you had just met a fascinating woman. To know her was to love her. Farewell, now our hearts beat for yours.