Demaine Funeral Home


Susan Shirley NEITHAMER

March 3, 1955November 12, 2020

Susan Shirley Neithamer, 65, of Alexandria, Virginia, passed away peacefully on Thursday, November 12, 2020, at home and surrounded by her family after a courageous battle with cancer. She was born on March 3, 1955 in Rural Ridge, Pennsylvania to Daniel and Angelina Simonetti. Susan married husband Calvin “Vin” Neithamer on December 30, 1978, and accompanied him through his medical school training and his internship and fellowship, taking the young couple from Pittsburgh, to Naples, Italy, to Denver and New York City before finally moving to Alexandria, Virginia in 1987. While stationed in Denver, Susan attended Metropolitan State College, graduating with distinction in 1985 with a Bachelor of Science degree in Business Administration.

After graduation, Susan began her career skillfully managing medical practices, with one brief interlude at E.F. Hutton in New York. Susan dedicated herself to this work so that, in her words, “physicians could do what they were trained to do best…treat patients.” Susan navigated through the many issues presented in the ever-changing practice of medicine for more than two decades. She forged strong connections supporting finely tuned practices that were successful in no small part thanks to her good work. She worked locally with Drs. Ryan and Sullivan at Alexandria Pediatrics and finished with Alexandria Urologists before changing careers. In her unique way, Susan could coalesce relationships between vendors, service providers, co-workers, and practitioners with seamless effort. She was efficient, effective, infectiously energetic, positive and highly respected in all her professional endeavors. She was a significant loss to any practice when life drew her in another direction. In a departure from her previous work endeavors with physicians, Susan spent ten years, from 2009 until 2019, as a partner in the successful retail-design business, Coco Blanca, located in National Harbor, Old Town Alexandria, and Bethesda. Susan and her partners delighted the community with a much-needed source for specialty clothing, accessories, furnishings, and design services in the tri-state area. Coco Blanca frequently participated in community-oriented events that benefitted local charities and offered internships for young entrepreneurs seeking first-time work experience. Susan was a stalwart supporter of fostering curious minds and teaching needed skills and principals for success, while giving back to her community. Susan’s final career challenge was her successful management, reorganization, and relocation of Hudgins Law Firm which she accomplished brilliantly despite her diagnosis and caring for her husband. The firm affectionately refers to their new location as “the house that Susie built.” Susan’s greatest joys in life involved caring for her husband, Vin, and sons, Jason and Gregory. When not working, Susan enjoyed supporting her boys in every sporting and theatrical endeavor, leading the packs and fan base with her infectious laugh and distinctive cheers. She also loved hosting her extended family for holidays and special occasions and reaching out to her community to contribute in any way possible, usually in leadership roles. Susan was the former President of the Northern Virginia Practice Management Association, Secretary and volunteer for the St. Stephen’s & St. Agnes School APT, and President and volunteer for the Belle Haven Women’s Association. Susan was a gourmet cook who shared her talents with family, friends, the Belle Haven community, SSSAS, and the Bucknell men’s lacrosse team when her older son matriculated there. She was known for her impeccable taste, attention to detail, ability to welcome, and her tireless compassion for her community and all she counted within her circle. Susan loved tennis and captained her club’s A team for many years. She adored all varieties of sports, skiing and travel, and she spent the little free time she had enjoying these activities with her family and friends. Susan moved with quickness and deftness and always made any one in her path feel special. She was a loyal friend of so many as she was gifted with her unique ability to engender trust and kindness. Her friends, colleagues, and family are all better for knowing and having her in their lives. Susan was greatly admired and much beloved by everyone in her life, and now sorely missed. In addition to her parents, Susan was predeceased by her brother, Daniel Simonetti, Jr. and a nephew, Anthony Simonetti. She is survived by her husband of 42 years, Dr. Vin Neithamer, sons Jason of Arlington, VA, and Gregory of Boston, MA, brother Joseph (Teena) Simonetti, nephew Dr. Joseph (Jennifer) Simonetti, Jr., niece Jennifer (Mark) Simonetti Platts, grandnieces Sydney and Charlotte Platts, and grandnephews Jackson Platts and Samuel and Nel Simonetti. There will be a private viewing held at Demaine Funeral Home on November 17, 2020. In addition, there will be a private service, due to COVID-19, at St. Mary’s Basilica and private internment following at the Ivy Hill Cemetery on November 18, 2020. The church service will be available via Zoom. A full celebration of Susan’s life is expected to take place on November 12, 2021, COVID-19 permitted. Please feel free to send flowers to the Funeral Home by November 17, 2020. In lieu of flowers, please send contributions, in the name of Susan Simonetti Neithamer, to the National Ovarian Cancer Coalition. St. Mary’s Basilica Service Vimeo Link (11/18/20 9:30AM-10:30AM ET): Flower Donations: National Ovarian Cancer Coalition:


No public services are scheduled at this time. Receive a notification when services are updated.


Susan Shirley NEITHAMER

have a memory or condolence to add?

Stephen ryan

November 18, 2020

God Bless you Susie. Like many people who have shared their memories here, I also feel so lucky that you were part of my world. Tania, Andrew Meredith and I are going to miss you more than we could ever say in words. Susie was the strongest and most positive person I have ever known. You defined the meaning of the "joy of life" You are the essence of it. You will forever be missed.

Steve Ryan

Elisabeth Dupee

November 17, 2020

Susie Neithamer—always full of life, laughter, compassion and endless energy. I loved every second knowing her and being able to spend 10 years of pure outrageousness—working our tushes off and laughing (sometimes crying) all the way. Simply magical. Susie could "Sussy" like no other! Heavens, I miss her! But her boundless aura of positive energy will always remain, conjuring up all kinds of fantastic memories. I can't tell you how blessed I feel to have known Susie and to have been a business partner on a fabulous roller coaster ride together. I am very sad right now, but she makes me smile from ear to ear.
I love you, Susie. See you when it's this Coco's turn, and we'll be sure to share some holy wine together.
Elisabeth Dupee xoxoxoxo

David Neithamer

November 17, 2020

We first met Susie when she and Vinny were in New York City at Cornell Medical School, visiting them while we were in graduate school at Cornell University. Our first impression was how gracious and welcoming she was, and we’ll never forget her genuine smile and infectious laughter. We were able to connect periodically over the years with Vinny and Susie at family gatherings, or when we were able to stop in for a visit when we were near Alexandria. We will be forever grateful we were able to see them relatively recently, surely a life lesson to take advantage of opportunities to spend time with those you love. Susie, we will miss you dearly but celebrate your life and all the warmth and love you brought to those you knew. Our deepest sympathies to Vinny, Jason, Gregory and the Simonetti family. David and Elizabeth Neithamer

Tom and Lorna Cropcho

November 16, 2020

Friends forever, that was what we planned. We have been a part of each others lives for almost 50 years. I will miss our long talks and unplanned visits. Tom said that he can still hear your voice and your laughter, always ready to laugh and make everyone happy. So smart, so talented, so beautiful. Our sadness is buffered by the wonderful memories that you have left us all with, tears turn into smiles. I will miss you terribly my friend , rest in peace. Our deepest condolences to Vin, Jason, Gregory, Joe, Teena and family. She loved you so.

Frank Sabatini

November 16, 2020

I will always remember her bright smile and sparkling eyes ever since our childhood growing up in Rural Ridge. As the younger sister of my best friend(Joe), she was always there, (even when we didn't want her to be!) but I loved her like a sister. Though we have not had the opportunity to see each other for many years, I will always remember sweet (and sassy!) Susan.

Love and sympathies to all the family.

George Schu

November 16, 2020

We first met Susie 40 years ago in Italy where she was a happy new bride. The young Italian American was a natural at creating her new life in Southern Italy. She absorbed as much as she could about the culture and language. She was instantly relatable, making new friends with ease. Susie amplified the joy of living La Dolce Vita.

Our friendship with Susie and Vin continued to grow after Italy. We always delighted in Susie’s ability to embrace and excel in every phase of life as a young professional, wife, mother and entrepreneur.

Life without Susie will hard for Vin, Jason, Gregory, her other relatives and all of us who loved her and were lucky to have her as part of our lives. But our lives are forever enriched because of Susie. That will be her lasting gift to us.

George and Theresa Schu

Donna Carlock

November 16, 2020

My dear friend Susan. I will treasure the memories of us in our childhood. We grew up in a little town but you always created giant and pleasurable memories. The playhouse your dad built for you was the neighborhood gathering place. We haven't been together for a long while but you were always on my mind and in my prays. I will always remember your bright smile and your silly little comments and nicknames. Mrs. Kanutoo going to miss you to! Love you, my friend Rest in Peace until we meet again. My deepest sympathy to Vin, Jason & Gregory, Joe and Tina Love, Donna (Mariani) Carlock

John Sabatini

November 16, 2020

There are no words that can express the sadness we feel for the loss of a beautiful person like Sue. Her smile lit up the room and was always present . The Lord will welcome her with open arms. God Bless the family. John & Audrey Sabatini

Trish Thibeault

November 15, 2020

Maybe, if you’re lucky, once in a lifetime a
Susie Neithamer comes into your life!! We are so lucky she came into ours. Susie was vibrant, happy, fun and beautiful, inside and out. I will greatly miss my sweet friend.
Vin, Jason and Gregory our hearts and thoughts are with at this time. Our love to you all,
Trish and Tom Thibeault

Kathryn McCarthy

November 14, 2020

Susan was a beautiful force of nature with her great energy and abundant personality. She was as full of compassion as she was full of fun. Susan will be greatly missed by her Belle Haven neighbors and tennis community. Our deepest sympathies and prayers to Vin, Jason and Gregory.

Kathy, Craig and Kristen McCarthy


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