Ethel Grace Ida Lloyd

A woman of faith and family, Ethel Lloyd was born in New York City on September 28, 1930, the youngest of the five daughters of Grace Itah Sparks. She was baptized at St. Rose of Lima Catholic Church in Manhattan and, at the tender age of three, crossed the ocean to join her sisters—Grace, Cleone, Emily, and Corinne—at their native home, the Caribbean Paradise of St. Thomas, U.S. Virgin Islands. In the years that followed, Ethel came to know her Aunt Blanche, Uncle Ernie, and cousin Leah; her Grandmother and Grandfather Joseph; and other family and friends, many of whom were parishioners of Saints Peter & Paul Catholic Cathedral in Charlotte Amalie.

Ethel received the sacraments of Communion and Confirmation at Saints Peter & Paul and attended its elementary school, where she graduated at the top of her eighth-grade class. Ethel spent time with the nuns at Saints Peter & Paul, helping to clean the Church and arrange the flowers for the altar on Sundays. Each year, when the sisters would go on a week’s sabbatical in Puerto Rico, one had to stay behind to take care of these chores for the Church. When Ethel was in eighth grade, they trusted her to clean the Church and arrange the flowers, so that they all could go to Puerto Rico together. Ethel happily recalled this experience in recent years, proud of the nuns’ show of confidence in her.

After completing the ninth and tenth grades at Charlotte Amalie High School, 15-year-old Ethel went to live with her sister’s family, first in the Bronx and later in Fall River, Massachusetts. Ethel attended Evander Childs and BMC Durfee high schools; clerked at Woolworth’s Five & Dime every afternoon, Friday nights, and all day on Saturdays; and continued her tradition of arranging altar flowers on Sundays. She attended Evander Childs and BMC Durfee high schools; clerked at Woolworth’s Five & Dime every afternoon, Friday nights, and all day on Saturdays; and continued her tradition of arranging altar flowers on Sundays.

Over the course of nine decades, Ethel came to be known by many names: Ethel, Grace, Gracie, Gracie Ethel, Essie. Used by friends and family to convey fondness and affection, these names and nicknames somehow fell short of expressing the depth of love and devotion she aroused in others. Ethel also answered to Mom, Grandma, Aunt Ethel—and as Jack’s wife. In a note found in Ethel’s missal, Jack Lloyd wrote to her a few years ago, saying:

“My dearest Ethel, thank you, my dear for—

1. Your love, affection, and understanding for all our years together.

Ethel met Jack at the subbase in St. Thomas in 1947, where she worked as a secretary and he was stationed. After months of chaperoned dating and more than a year of deliberation, Ethel accepted Jack’s proposal. The two were married in January 1949 at Sacred Heart Church in Augusta, Georgia, with the nuns and seventh and eighth graders of Sacred Heart School as guests at their nuptial mass.

2. Five wonderful children in each of whom I see many of your own characteristics.

Ethel became Mom in 1949 with the birth of Stephen, followed by Susan in 1953, Jackie in 1954, Philip in 1957, and Annette in 1961. Along the way, she welcomed niece Nancy and nephew Ronald into the family.

3. Giving them the loving care that means so much to them, and to me.

Ethel expressed her love for her children in so many ways. She scrimped so the boys could participate in sports and scouts, and the girls could take dance lessons; she took part-time jobs at Christmastime and to pay for braces. As Mom, Ethel supported, consoled, encouraged, and admonished all five. She put the kids in snowsuits, opened the back door, and told them to go play. She met their teachers, made sure they did their homework, and signed report cards. She got them into uniforms on weekdays and “good clothes” for church on Sundays. Mom made sure they were punctual and polite, “put [their] behinds in the back of the chair and sat up straight,” chewed with their mouths closed, and kept their elbows off the table. In short, Ethel prepared her sons and daughters for life.

4. Taking care of our home and other material things so well.

Known for her “eat off the kitchen floor” housekeeping, Ethel organized the Lloyd household, established its routines, and meticulously maintained the family home. Mom made sure that beds were made every morning, sheets changed every week, and pillowcases ironed as they came out of the dryer. She taught her sons as well as her daughters to hang up their clothes—and to do it properly, by fastening the top buttons on shirts and coats and smoothing the pleats on skirts and the creases on pants. Called by some “the Energizer Bunny,” Ethel set a demanding pace for herself and others. By her daily example, she demonstrated the enduring value of hard work and attention to detail, instilling in her children a sense of purpose that would serve them throughout their lives.

5. Being my constant inspiration, whether I am with you or away.

Ethel was a full partner, perhaps the managing partner, in the Lloyd enterprise. She was steadfast in her support of her husband, whether Jack was attending college in the evenings, away five days a week selling industrial paint, serving in the National Guard on weekends, or climbing the corporate ladder at Motorola. Ethel tended the home fires; managed multiple out-of-state moves; and created attractive, comfortable sanctuaries for the family in New Jersey, Pennsylvania, Florida, Illinois, and North Carolina. In later years, Ethel became a BeautiControl consultant. She advised clients on their appearance; provided high quality, direct sale cosmetics; and offered a flexible career plan to those who were interested. Ethel held many positions with the company, managed a number of consultants, and formed several lasting friendships. Ethel seemed unaware that she herself—with her luminous skin and forever-youthful figure—was the best marketing money could not buy.

6. Taking care of yourself, so that today you are more beautiful than when I first saw you.”

Ethel was beautiful in spirit and mind, and generous with her time and talents. She enjoyed participating in the local Red Hats Society and, with friends, formed a book club that met monthly. The book club members soon found that they enjoyed socializing over food and wine, but seldom discussed the book of the month. At Ethel’s suggestion, they became the “unbook” club. A member of many parishes over the years, most recently Ethel belonged to St. Andrew the Apostle Catholic Church, and served Holy Communion to residents of nursing homes in the parish. Ethel also founded the Senior Silver and Gold Society at St. Bernadette’s; belonged to a Bible study group; and was especially devoted to the Virgin Mary, Mother of Jesus, often praying to Mary to intercede on her behalf.

Ethel is prayerfully and lovingly remembered by her sons Stephen Lloyd (Rita) and Philip Lloyd (Betsy) and daughters, Susan Lloyd, Jackie Lloyd (Bill), and Annette Conners (Rich); six grandchildren: Michael (Andrea), Dana (Rich), Lizzy, Nick, Kate, and Jack; and five great-grandchildren: Mira, Emma, Evan, Sydney, and Owen. She will be missed by family and friends, especially Cindy Beebe, Margaret Centamore, Kim Hilt, Mary Ellen Lloyd, Catherine Mills, her godchild Liz Miller, and Corinne and Vinny Toomey.

A funeral mass will take place on Wednesday, April 13, 2022, at 11:00 a.m. at St. Andrew the Apostle Catholic Church, 3008 Old Raleigh Road, in Apex, North Carolina. Those unable to attend in person can view the funeral mass online at 11 a.m. at this link: https://youtu.be/HCoSx4TIJEk . Burial will take place at Oakwood Cemetery, 701 Oakwood Avenue, in Raleigh, North Carolina, followed by a reception at Apex Funeral Home, 550 West Williams Street, in Apex, North Carolina.

In lieu of customary remembrances, memorial contributions may be made to:

Saint Andrew the Apostle Catholic Church

3008 Old Raleigh Road

Apex, North Carolina 27502

(919) 362-0414

https://www.standrew.org

Sisters of Charity of Saint Elizabeth

P.O. Box 476

Convent Station, New Jersey 07961-0476

(973) 290-5000

https://www.scnj.org

Fond memories and expressions of condolences can be shared online at www.apexfuneral.net.

Hail, holy Queen, mother of mercy, our life, our sweetness, and our hope.

To you we cry, poor banished children of Eve,

to you we send up our sighs, mourning and weeping in this valley of tears.

Please visit https://youtu.be/9w-tK_rc86Y for the memorial video.