Sammy Jean McKay

Our lovely mother and wife left this earth May 17th, 2026. She lived a long, happy and active life with tremendous inner strength. With that strength she soldiered through health challenges with grace until the end when her beautiful enormous heart took its final rest.

Sammy was born in Fayetteville, AR, to Warren and Esther Whitlock. A year later the family moved to Bakersfield, CA. In 1943 the family settled in Fallbrook, CA - northern San Diego County - where she attended Fallbrook Union High School from 1946-1950 and met the love of her life and future husband, Howard McKay, Jr. She excelled in athletics as well as academic courses. She was a leader, well respected by classmates and teachers. After graduation she earned a Red Cross Water Safety certification on Catalina Island and became a swim instructor, teaching many youth and adults how to swim. Sammy loved to sing and had a beautiful voice, singing often with family, friends and at many functions. She was multi-talented and always ready for a challenge and hard work. She had a loving, bright spirit and brought love and light to the lives of so many. She was extraordinary.

Sammy and Howard were married January 25, 1952 and had a beautiful relationship for 74 years. They had two beautiful daughters, Kim and Melanie, who benefited from her learning to sew as a young newlywed, creating many outfits for first day of school, Easter, Halloween, and tutus and dance recital costumes for Melanie. Sammy was a loving, cheerful, supportive mother and wife. She helped guide her daughters through school, college, and life in general, as well as supporting Howard through college, law school and his Civil Service career. She was our champion. Her vibrant and resilient nature was ever encouraging and made our journeys smoother. In later years, she earned an A.A. degree, reveling in the process from start to finish and sharing her class experience with family at the dinner table. Her greatest joy was her family and being together.

There were many family vacations with Sammy as our personal and stellar family travel agent, planning trips to amazing locations with exceptional accommodations. Sammy and Howard traveled extensively throughout the U.S., Europe, New Zealand and Australia. These were happy, fulfilling times resulting in many photo albums and lasting memories revisited by family often. In 1993 Sammy and Howard retired and built their dream home in Snohomish, WA. Together they worked very hard and made their surrounding 3.5 acres look like a park. She had a special touch that turned all things lovely, inside and out. Sammy loved the view of the Cascade Mountains, and especially all the wildlife: deer, squirrels, rabbits, butterflies, and myriad birds. She marveled at the spectacular sunrises, sunsets and brilliant rainbows. Her last words were, "I want to go over the rainbow." Whenever we see one, we will think of her. One of her favorite phrases was by Bev Doolittle: "Let my spirit soar."

She is survived by Howard, Jr.; daughters Kim and Melanie (Dennis); sisters-in-law Andrea and Cathy; and many loving nieces and nephews. She was preceded in death by her parents; sister Judy Merry; brothers-in-law Tom Merry, David McKay, Bill McKay, Ron Dixon; sister-in-law Vicki McKay; father-in-law Howard McKay, Sr.; mothers-in-law Thelma McKay and Irma McKay.

As Sammy wished, there will be a celebration of life attended by family members, to be arranged at a later date.

We miss you so much. You will always be in our minds and hearts.

In lieu of flowers, donations in her memory can be made to:

Alley Cat Allies

National Audubon Society

(Please see links below)