Rebecca Ann Dillard

Rebecca Ann Dillard was born July 25, 1985, at Duke University Hospital in Durham, NC at 33 weeks weighing 2 pounds and 10 ounces to Gurney Reece and Mabel Ann Osborne Dillard. She spent 4 weeks at Duke Hospital ‘s Neonatal Intensive Care Nursery and 5 weeks at Wake Med’s Intermediate Care Nursery. She was able to go home with her parents on October 1, 1985, and had lived with them till her death, which fulfilled their desire to take care of her as long as they could. She passed on December 17, 2024, at home with her parents after a brief illness with a respiratory virus. The family is grateful to EMS and their efforts to revive her.

Rebecca had many health challenges in her life with numerous surgeries and other procedures but was blessed to have exceptional doctors who got her the right medical care when she needed it, enabling her to live an amazing 39 years. She was diagnosed with a chromosome anomaly at birth which meant she was missing part of life’s instruction book, and you need every piece of every chromosome. She required total care, 24/7 365 days a year. Her parents’ goal became “to help her be the best she could be.”

Rebecca first received early intervention services from Tammy Lynn Center. Next, she attended UCP Preschool and then entered the special education classes of Wake County Public Schools. While in school she enjoyed participating in the Special Olympics program for many years. After finishing her school career, she attended an adult day care program at the North Raleigh Total Life Center for the next 19 years operated by Resources for Seniors. The program was better known to her as “school” where she loved attending and participating in things she liked and understood. She was always asking if it was “back to school day” so she could go where she knew she was loved and safe. She attended two different churches over the years where members volunteered to stay with her during services. Rebecca was fortunate to have had so many wonderful people in her life through the years who worked with her at the various schools, programs and churches she attended. We are very grateful to everyone who interacted with Rebecca in whatever capacity and made her feel loved.

Rebecca could appear very weak but be as strong as an ox if someone was trying to make her do something she did not want to do. Just try to draw blood, where it could take her Daddy and the whole doctor's office staff to get it done. But once it was over it was over for her, and she moved on to the next thing saying “all done” as she rolled out of the office in her wheelchair. She would “work” for stickers in less stressful medical procedures.

Rebecca loved to watch Norm Abram on “The New Yankee Workshop” program, which she called “Hammer”, build furniture. A day rarely went by that she did not have to watch part of an episode or several entire ones. She would tell you what he was going to build next when an episode ended. Putting a finish on the furniture was not something she liked to watch so she would say “fast” (think VCR). She loved watching her numerous VCR tapes and DVD ‘s. She gave them her own names so when she asked for “eyes” one had to know which one it was because it was not the name on the box.

Rebecca was a keen observer of all that was going on around her even when she did seem to be paying attention, she was. Her favorite color was orange so when the orange crayons were gone a new pack of crayons had to be purchased just to get an orange one. She loved Barney, Bert, Ernie, Grover, Elmo, Mickey Mouse. Christmas, Halloween, numbers ABC’s, stuffed animals to sleep with, and flash cards. Her shirts and socks had to have characters and/or designs on them. Pink was the color she looked good in. She loved music and had a good sense of rhythm and timing and could tell you what the next song that was on her musical tapes. She might start singing a song, then stop only to come back in at the end with perfect timing and rhythm. She could sing longer song lyrics than she could string together words. She did have language to make her wants and wishes known but not to carry on a conversation. But she certainly did let her wants and wishes be known quite loudly at times.

Rebecca loved to ride for hours in the adaptive van on weekends and holidays. On Saturdays she loved to go to the RDU airport to see the planes and by the NC State farms on Trinity Road to see the sheep, goats, horses and occasionally cows. On Sundays there were various routes to take to locations where we could find all kinds of animals from donkeys to emus. She was always in “driver mode” with her eyes facing forward to see what was coming next, making it frustrating for her parents to point out the animals she might see if she would just turn her head.

Rebecca couldn’t tell time, but she could. She would be at the door of the center waiting for her daddy to pick her up at 3 o’clock. She also knew when it was time for a haircut or shot and would let her Mommy and caregivers know. Rebecca loved to give high 5’s as a greeting or goodbye. She had a big sense of personal space and did not like people too close. It was a good sign if she let you in her space, even if only for a few seconds, that she liked you. Bath time was a special time for her as she splashed in the tub while listening to music. It was a calming and relaxing time for her.

Rebecca was a very strong-willed young lady, a trait that helped her survive for so many years, so all who worked with her had to learn to work with her on her terms and make her think what she was doing was her idea. No matter what the situation Rebecca only had to flash her “million-dollar” smile and everything was okay for those around her.

She was predeceased by her paternal grandparents Clifton Ward and Flora Della Sebastion Dillard; her paternal Uncle James Edward Hodges; her maternal grandparents Arthur Howard and Marjorie Helen Riggsbee Osborne and her maternal Aunt Iva Juanita Osborne Billings.

She is survived by her parents and by her paternal Aunt Edna Della Dillard Hodges and maternal Uncle James Oscar Billings and several cousins. She will be missed by her Direct Service Professional worker “Miss Mary”, who has worked with her for 11 years in the home, and all the wonderful staff at The Total Life Center.

Rebecca’s mission on this earth was to help the people who had the privilege of knowing her to develop compassion, empathy and a love for people who have disabilities and/or differences. She liked everyone who showed her attention and did not understand the concept of hate. Her parents considered her a gift from God and feel blessed and are thankful He gave them 39 amazing years to be her parents. They consider themselves to be much better people because of the experiences they have had and have grown in their understanding of unconditional love and acceptance of those who are different. They also were given the opportunity to be of service to others through the years because of her. Rebecca was exceptional, one of a kind and she will be missed.