Virgil Edward Stockard

Virgil Stockard, of Westminster, CA, passed away peacefully surrounded by his family on July 29, 2015. He is survived by his wife, Mary of 51 years; two daughters, Chrissie & Amy; two grandchildren, Evan & Nate; four siblings, Ernie, Robert Duel, Nelva, Anna Bell, numerous family and friends; preceded in death by parents, EB & Mary Stockard who were married 81 ½ yrs and lived in Lawrenceburg, TN., brothers, Leon, James, Ken & Herschel & sister, Marie. The family has requested everyone wear casual or golf attire to the service. A visitation will take place at Westminster Memorial Park on Sunday, Aug. 9, 2015 from 10:30-11:30 am, A Celebration of Life Service at 12:00 pm and a Graveside Service to follow. In lieu of flowers the family has requested donations be made to: Long Beach Little League, PO Box 15217, Long Beach, CA, 90815.

Virgil Stockard

By Amy Stockard

I am Amy, Virgil’s youngest of two daughters and my sister is Chrissie Seal. Thank you all for coming to celebrate the life of my father Virgil Stockard.

Virgil Stockard was born in the small town of Lawrenceburg, Tennessee, on May 6th, 1940. His parents were E.B. and Mary, who were married for 81 years. My dad was the youngest of 10 children, and they all still refer to him as their baby brother, no matter what age he was. E.B. ad Mary’s children are:

(1) Marie

(2) James

(3) Melvin “Leon”

(4) Robert “Duel”

(5) Nelva

(6) Ernest

(7) Anna

(8) Kenneth

(9) Norman “Hershel”

(10) Virgil

They had real southern names.

When he was first born, he lived in a big house in Dearfield off Buffalo Road until he was 5 years old. His parents rented the big house and decided to purchase a little house in Etheridge off Flat Woods Road. This little house had a water cistern running through the middle of the house and did not have a bathroom. If you can imagine, from 5 years old to 18 years old, my dad used an outhouse, whether it was raining, snowing or in the middle of summer when it was 100 degrees out and 100% humidity. The house originally was a one bedroom house for 8 people. Granny and papa slept in the living room, Nelva and Anna Bell slept in the one bedroom, Duel slept in the cistern and the back porch was converted to a bedroom for Ken, Hershel and my dad, where there were two beds. It was rare when a person had a bed to themselves. Often the neighbor boys, Billy and Joe would stay with Hershel and my dad in their converted room.

My dad attended Etheridge Elementary School and then Lawrence County High School. He originally attended Etheridge Church of Christ and after they moved to the little house, he went to Flat Woods Church of Christ. They did not have a car, therefore they all walked a far distance to go to and from church. If they were lucky, sometimes a neighbor would give them a ride. Each of the kids would receive one pair of shoes a year. When they no longer fit or were worn out, they were out of luck and had to continue to use them. Of course, one of my dad’s favorite “stories” to tell us was how he walked 5 miles to school, uphill, both ways, barefoot in the snow.

My dad’s family had a farm and farmed cotton, corn, peanuts, cane and soy beans. Often when they would pull the peanuts off, it would be freezing cold, but they mustered through it. To earn extra money, the family helped neighbors with their farms by picking cotton and strawberries. Granny had a large garden of her own and would grow everything that they ate. Since they did not have a freezer, they canned everything, including pork. On the farm, they had pigs and cows. The boys would milk the cows every morning, while the girls would hand wash the laundry by scrubbing it, then they would place it in a big iron kettle and lastly, they would hang the laundry to dry on the fence. As my aunt Anna Bell said, they looked like real hillbillies.

Since my dad was the baby of the family, I’m told that he was the pet. He was the only one in the family that was able to get involved in activities at school. He received a letter in school for being in the FFA (Future Farmers of America). The teacher, Mr. Odeneal, nicknamed Wheaty by my dad and his friends, was always his favorite teacher. His senior year, the FFA won first place at the fair by showing how to increase profits on hogs. My dad was also the only child of the ten kids that ever had a party at the little house. I noticed at a young age that he was his parents pet when we would arrive to their house in Lawrenceburg, Tennessee and if anyone was staying at their house, they would be kicked out so our family could stay at Granny and Papa’s.

When my dad was in high school, to earn money, he worked the concession stand at the high school football games. He also worked at the grocery store delivering groceries to people that were unable to go shopping. He would always take it a step further and would unload the groceries and put them away in the cabinets and refrigerator. Another job that he had was at Nietergess Brothers Grain where he separated and bagged grains.

At the little house off Flat Woods Road, the neighbor’s had a daughter named Ann Lox. Unfortunately Ann had encephalitis and the doctors said that she could never walk. Ann was always around the Stockard children, including my dad. She wanted to keep up with them and somehow she learned to walk just to be a part of the group. The neighbor thanked my dad’s family for helping her reach the unreachable, but that is the type of family that they were.

My aunt Anna Bell was able to save money by keeping the books for the grain store in town and she bought a car when she lived at the little house. Whenever Anna Bell had a date, my dad was so excited because he and Hershel would use Anna Bell’s car. Anna Bell thinks that my dad put as many miles on her car that she did. Whenever Anna Bell went to sell her car, one of my dad’s friends wanted to buy it from her. He said that he had been in the car many times and he knew exactly how fast it went because he was in the car with my dad when he tested it.

After my dad learned how to drive, he taught his dad how to drive. Although Papa was such a bad driver, his neighbor told him to let her know whenever he needed to go anywhere and she would drive him, just to keep him off the road.

In 1958, when my dad was 18 years old, he joined the navy. After boot camp, he was originally stationed in San Francisco on Treasure Island for 6 months. Even though he grew up in the snow, he said that Treasure Island was the coldest place that he ever lived. He was stationed in Long Beach, California as a Basic Fundamentals of Radar Equipment Operations (AKA Radar man). He also served on the USS Edson, where he traveled to Japan, Guam and off the coast of Cuba. He served in the Navy until July 31st, 1962.

During his time in the service, on the days that he would have liberty, he periodically would give his seaman buddies rides in his car. In 1959, he often dropped off one of his crazy seaman buddies named Barry to go and see my mom’s sister LuAnn. While he was at their house, one particular day he offered to give a young 16 year old Mary Alice Nicholas a ride to her grandma’s house. For three years, they wrote to each other and would see one another when they could. On November 29th, 1963, my dad at the age of 23, married my mom, at the age of 19. That is when they lovingly became to be known as Virg-n-Mary.

When friends of ours were young and in Sunday school, they were learning about the Virgin Mary. When they spoke about the Virgin Mary, one of them raised their hand and said, “I know Virg-n-Mary.”

My dad began working for General Telephone Electric/GTE and worked there for 30 years. He was the plant manager of the Slater office. In his early years with GTE, he worked on the Queen Mary for two months and installed the electrical and phone system. He was fortunate enough to be able to retire from GTE at the young age of 52.

My dad was always a hard worker. When he first starting working for GTE, both he and my mom worked second jobs at Mission Pharmacy in Long Beach. They each would deliver medications to people that were unable to pick them up. My dad would drive his motorcycle, which allowed him to park and get in and out faster. He was paid $0.50 per delivery. Together they made $100 a month, which paid for their rent and their mortgage on their first little 600 square foot cabin in Big Bear. Earning this extra money allowed the two of them to save to buy a house in Westminster.

My parents waited seven years before they welcomed Chrissie into the world in 1970, with a full head of black hair, and 22 months later, they welcomed the very bald me, which a year later, my hair finally started to grow in, we all found out that I actually had blonde hair. My sister and I were so different from the start, but we were wholeheartedly loved equally by mom and dad. My parents were a great match. My mom is the extrovert and my dad is the introvert and they complimented one another so well. They were married for 51 years and 8 months, to the day. A year and a half ago, my sister and I threw my parents a 50th wedding anniversary party at Old Ranch Country Club in Seal Beach. My dad picked out the location, helped plan it and chose the food selection. My dad was all for the party, but my mom had reservations. After the party was over, we were all so glad that we had it. We celebrated the two of them and they both had the best time. It was fun to celebrate this great feat in life with them.

Both of my parents are really handy. They built 2 ½ homes in Big Bear, alongside with my parents friends Lowell and Viola Young, whom my sister and I refer to our grandparents through love. My dad could fix just about anything in the house and on a car. If he didn’t know how to fix it, he would tinker with it and figure it out. He was a problem solver.

I wanted to share some of the sayings that my dad would often repeat, which my sister and I call “Dad-isms”. Some examples are:

• One of his favorites was by Jackie Gleason from the Honeymooners: “One of these days Alice, you’re going to the moon!”

• My dad would tell Nate “You’ve got to have patience” and Nate would say “No patience”. Anytime anyone would mention the word patience, my dad would say “no patience!”

• Can’t walk and chew gum at the same time

• He would tell my friend in the Marine Corp “Thanks for being the Navy’s helper”

• He quoted his mom by saying “She has on $1.00 worth of $0.10 perfume”

• If anyone was getting a haircut, they were “getting their ears lowered”

• “Shopping is for girls” “I don’t do shopping”

• He would quote Chrissie from when she was little by saying “Fit me”. It’s so appropriate since Chrissie is the shopper in the family.

• While growing up, the friends of Chrissie and I were referred to as Mr. & Mrs. and he would say our friends name, for example, Mr. and Mrs. Jerry or Mr. & Mrs. Penny.

• Whenever he said that he was talking to friends or family, he would say that they were “sitting around swapping lies”

As many of you know, my dad loved to play golf. He walked the golf course whenever he played. He went over to Nelson's house every week to putt in a putting tournament, where he often won the monthly tournament. Putting is especially where he excelled when he played golf, I think mostly due to his patience. He always loved to compete when playing golf.

One time when he played golf in Tennessee with his sister Anna Bell, the trash talking was on and the competition was fierce. At the 14th hole the two of them were neck and neck. The hole had a left dogleg with a creek at the end. Anna Bell went first and she hit hers just before the creek on the fairway. My dad went next and hit his ball into the creek. Anna Bell was so excited, as she thought that that would put her ahead of him. When they got closer, they found out that his ball did not go in the creek, and in fact hit a rock in the creek, bounced off and went straight in the hole. He most certainly liked to re-tell that story to anyone that would listen.

Besides my mom, my dad’s next true love were his grandsons, Evan and Nate. When his grandchildren were born, all bets were off. They had his heart once they were born. He would visibly light up every time he saw, spoke to them on the phone, or when he spoke about them. He was so nurturing to them as babies. He even babysat Evan when he was a baby while Chrissie went back to work. It was so enjoyable for him and strengthened their bond even more. He even respected the wishes of Chrissie, a first time mother, when watching Evan, no matter how crazy he thought her requests were. Both Evan and Nate brought out the fun loving child within my dad. He laughed, played with them, whether it be in the pool, golf, basketball, baseball, soccer, football, on scooters or what have you. He let them play with his hair and make pho-hawks. He was so proud of them and would talk your ears off about them, whether it be about one of the many sports they played, especially baseball with Long Beach Little League, or their music recitals, school holiday shows, graduations, or something funny that they said. He helped guide the boys to be the wonderful, well grounded, fun loving, thought provoking young men that they have grown to be. He helped give them this wonderful base in life to grow on, which they will build on and can model bits and pieces of their lives after him, much like many other people have done.

My dad’s favorite hobbies and interests include Long Beach Little League Baseball, where he always did the pitch count, golf, UCLA Bruins, Boston Red Sox - his favorite all time player was Ted Williams, Boston Celtics -his favorite player was Larry Bird, Nascar - favorite driver was Bill Elliot, Awesome Bill from Dawsonville and later was Casey Kane, and the Tennessee Volunteers. If you were a fan or wore anything other than what he liked, he would tell you how his team, player or driver was better. I’m sure many of you have experienced him telling you that you couldn’t come into his house with anything that went against who he was rooting for, including tattoos. The thing about my dad was that you always knew that he liked you when he joked and bantered with you. He was a die-hard fan, but still made competition light hearted and fun.

My dad was everyone’s friend, even to my sister and I, his grandchildren, siblings, nephews, nieces, parents, aunts, uncles and in-laws would agree. He was a man of few words and chose his words carefully, except when it came to his grandchildren Evan and Nate. He could talk for hours about those two boys. Many people looked up to my dad with admiration and strived to be like him.

My dad believed in having fun in life and appreciated that each of us get there in a different way. He always patiently watched and supported us while we all tried to figure it out.

He wasn’t afraid to make mistakes, but learned from them. He always supported anyone that truly tried, but if it didn’t turn out well, he would say “You’ll get ‘em next time”.

One time I tried to play an April Fool’s joke on my dad and it completely backfired. My car was in the shop and I borrowed his truck to get to work. My sister and I worked at the same place at the time. We thought it would be fun to play an April Fool’s joke on him. I told him that I got in a car accident and totaled his truck. All he cared about was that I was okay. I told him that I was okay, but again told him that his truck was totaled. He said, that was fine, as long as I was okay. My joke didn’t work at all. That was the type of person that he was. He didn’t care about possessions, but he cared deeply for my sister and me.

My sister has a magnet in her house that reads “When all else fails, call Dad”. This is exactly what both my sister and I would do. He was a plethora of information and he could communicate clearly and precisely, so something difficult was easy to understand. He was always there for us when we needed him, whether it be to fix something, to come over our houses to have work completed, to support us with our hobbies and interests, he would give us a couple of dollars to buy something at the snack bar at the baseball game, or just to talk. He truly was a rock for each of us individually.

When I was in kindergarten, we had to write a fill in the blank book and draw a picture to go with it. It asked what my favorite thing was is about my mom and my favorite thing about my dad. I wrote that my favorite thing about my dad was his big belly laugh. To this day, that is still one of my favorite things about my dad. He loved to laugh and it was infectious. I can still hear it in my head.

I’ll end this by telling you a few ways that I admired about my dad:

• His gentle way about him

• Encouraging attitude: If you set your mind to it, you can do it

• His work ethic

• Encouraging

• He was a friend

• His big belly laugh

• He was the best role model anyone could ask for

• Positive thinking

• Generosity

• Genuineness

• Fairness

• Patience

• Most humble person I have ever met

• Grateful

• Taught me to respect nature and soak in the beauty of it

• The love that he gave

When my dad and I would sign our names on a card or note, we would always write or say “Your wonderful Dad” or “Your wonderful daughter”. My dad truly was that, a wonderful dad.