Tom Wier was born on the south side of Chicago on Easter morning, 1927. He always attributed special meaning to that fact and mentioned it often. He was born at home, a 4th floor walkup occupied by his parents, John and Jane Wier and his older brother John. The story goes that his first bed was a shoe box or dresser drawer.
Tom spent his youth hanging out with the neighborhood boys, his older brother and his friends. They had lots of freedom in those days and given that his brother was 6 years older, they spent a fair amount of time exploring downtown Chicago as well.
In his late teens, two substantial things happened in his life. He met the love of his life, Barbara Grace McGuire, and he went into the Navy. Tom met Barbara in high school, where he was a “late bloomer” and small for his age. Barbara said that he’d better grow or she wasn’t going to date him anymore! But Tom was lucky in love and in the Navy – the war ended before he was shipped out, he grew, and so did his relationship with Barbara. They married on September 4th, 1949 and headed to Cornell College in Mt. Vernon, Iowa where Tom used the GI bill to earn his bachelor’s degree in Social Work.
Their first daughter, Nancy, was born in Chicago in the spring of 1951. They later moved to Wisconsin where Tom took a social work position in Crandon, Wisconsin and their second daughter, Beth was born in the spring of 1953 in the neighboring town of Fond du Lac.
After Beth was born, Tom was called back into the service during the Korean Conflict. He was shipped to Guam. Barbara and their daughters returned to Chicago and stayed with Barbara’s mother Ethel and her little brother Micky.
Strange but true, at different times, Tom’s mother and brother-in-law Mickey lived in the SAME fourth story apartment that Tom was born in. Even though they never owned the property, some family member from one side of the family or the other occupied that apartment for 35 years.
In 1956, the family moved to Downers Grove, IL and purchased a small bungalow on a big lot. That was home for the next 13 years. Tom was working at Western Electric in Cicero and took the Burlington into the city every day. Weekends were filled with family picnics and outdoor activities. There was a two- story tree house, a little barn with a REAL pony named Sunday, a raft so we could be Tom Sawyer on the swamp across the street, campfires, an ice rink and so on. Most things were done in the middle of the night – by himself -- so it would be a surprise for his daughters. His energy was endless.
In the late summer of 1957, their youngest daughter, Susan Barbara, was born in Hinsdale, IL. Life continued in Downers Grove with Indian Princess meetings, family gatherings, trips into the city to see other relatives, long family vacations by car.
In 1969, Western Electric asked Tom to transfer to San Francisco or Denver and Tom and Barbara decided on Denver. They initially looked at Boulder, but when they visited, there were naked young people in the river right off Pearl Street Mall. So we moved to Applewood instead and we were all told that CU/Boulder was not an option for college.
Next came marriages and grandchildren with family always being the center of their lives and they were available at a moment’s notice for anything…good or bad. You just needed that tone in your voice and they were in the car and off to help.
Their first grandchild was Sarah, born in 1975 to Nancy. Then came Andrew Thomas born in 1982 to Beth. Next was Susie’s first son, Austin in 1985. In 1987, Jake was born to Beth and 15 days later came Miles, born to Susie. His great grandchildren were born to his granddaughter Sarah. In 2006 came Rylan Thomas and in 2010 came Payton Grace.
In the spring of 2004, Tom’s beloved Barbara died from an aggressive form of Parkinson’s. Tom took care of her 24 hours a day up until the last 18 days of her life which she spent in Hospice. The grieving was deep and profound but Tom rallied and became a volunteer at an elementary school in the neighborhood to honor Barbara – she had always wanted to be a teacher but had babies instead of going to college. He started with the kindergarteners and stayed until those children had completed their education at the school. He was also active in politics, loved the outdoors, was an avid bike rider and loved to connect with people.
He had a short stint in a Senior Living Facility when he learned he was diabetic and needed an additional level of care. He spent the next 6 plus years at an Assisted Living Facility in the Highlands in Denver. He maintained his interests in the world and interacting with people until the very end. Some of his favorite activities were interacting with the staff and trying to save energy for future generations. He could be seen daily taking the TV remote out of his red walker and turning off unwatched TVs, and he turned off the lights in any rooms that were left empty.
Tom developed close relationships with the restaurants within a couple mile radius of the facility and LOVED those connections. Once, after a visit, he forgot his credit card at the restaurant across the street. They ran over with the card, another lobster BLT and a Bloody Mary!
This year has had lots of happy memories. Tom enjoyed one-on-one visits with all of his grandchildren and with close friend Dave Hicks. He also had a visit from his brother-in-law Mickey and Mickey’s wife Shirley Mae. Tom had introduced Mickey to Shirley and they are still going strong all these years later. Tom also spent a wonderful evening in Denver with his newfound 70-year-old niece, Mardelle. Thanks to 23 & ME, it was discovered that his brother John was doing more than painting at the Art Institute in Chicago!
Two weeks before Tom’s death, he was in Estes Park, enjoying a bratwurst on the patio and watching the rapidly moving river. Tom’s sister-in-law Shirley Olson had all SIX of her children, lots of her grandchildren and great grandchildren in town and Tom wanted the opportunity to see them. Tom pushed himself hard to get there and it provided a great final memory.
The following Tuesday, it appears he had a heart attack and needed urgent and additional care. We were very blessed to already be part of the Hospice program. The miracles continued to happen as his first conversation with his hospice nurse, a few months back, revealed that she grew up in Downers Grove, IL and lived on Cumnor Road about 4 houses away from where we grew up! The years didn’t overlap but nevertheless, it was AMAZING! There was an instant connection and she was by his side from morning until night, helping him make the transition on that final day. A few hours later, he was gone and she was back to finalize the end of life tasks. Thank you, Kimberly!
Tom’s life was all about connection and being of service, whatever that meant. He also was an important male role model, starting in his mid-teens with Barbara’s brother Mickey, who lost his father when he was just a couple months old. He continued with Barbara’s sister’s kids when their dad, Jack Olson, died at 49 years old. Then he stepped up for Beth’s son’s Drew and Jake, when there was a void of a male role model in their lives.
He was no angel but he never stopped trying to understand and contribute to Planet Earth. Rest in peace Little Daddy. You are very loved.
He is survived by his three daughters, Nancy ( Dennis ), Beth, and Susie ( Rick ); his five grandchildren Sarah ( Eric ), Drew, Austin, Jake ( Erin ) Miles, and his great-grandchildren Rylan and Payton.
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